View Full Version : What's the difference btw Flirt and Relationship ?


userguide
06-30-17, 02:34 PM
I am not very good at it.

I guess a one night stand is not yet a relationship.
It can start a flirt.
It can end a flirt.

I saw a funny movie on youtube one day - "you know you date a Canadian" or something like that.
The "funny" part was, according to many commenters, that a couple is not really a couple until they declare it to one another, even if they've already slept together.

I am not sure whether it's strange or not.

What would you need to do/hear/experience, in order to officially tell everybody you're in a relationship with someone ?

Maybe this should have a poll, but I don't think the raw time is what matters most....

20thcenturyfox
06-30-17, 04:52 PM
I just assumed that people all over the world have sexual relations for all sorts of reasons. Whether you discuss it with your partner beforehand or afterward, how would you possibly know your partner's intentions without discussing them?

And if it's a relationship that you're looking for, why wouldn't you discuss that with your partner sooner than later?

And officially telling everyone else? Why would you tell anybody anything without first having a clear understanding about it with your partner?

Pilgrim
06-30-17, 07:07 PM
Flirting I don't think is a bad thing. A relationship is something completely different. You have to love yourself enough to care about someone else. That's my conclusion.

kilted_scotsman
07-01-17, 02:04 PM
If you're in a relationship, you can flirt with others if you want to and it doesn't matter... because both of you are grounded and know where you stand.

userguide
07-02-17, 05:24 AM
I think I should give a practical example of my problem:

There is a girl I like. I don't know her well, but I'd like to spend time with her romantically.
She seems very busy and introvertic, so I don't know if she's looking for a flirt or a relationship.
Provided that she is into me ofc.

The difference is crucial because I am ADHD.
I have virtually no social life, only work and work and then work again.

I think the problem is I don't think I have an attractive life I can share with her.

If an intense month is all she's into, then I can fake it somehow to have a nice, intensive month with her.

I will pretend I am a normal guy.

I will play cool. I will go to parties. I will go to a concert. Meet new friends. Buy new clothes.
I will call her back after a minute. I will borrow a car. All that stuff for humans.

The reward will be an intense month with a beautiful girl.
Next month we will be far apart and everybody will be happy.


If she's into a relationship, then I should introduce her to my dull life.
That's risky. But obviously worth trying.
I will need to combat anxiety long-run, change strategies, and so on and so on.
It's a lot of work to do.

But it's a different strategy.

No faking, no playing around. Showing real, blant, myself right from the beginning.

I want to know which strategy I need to choose.
Is there any hint ? Am I supposed to ask her out for a date and then ask openly what she wants ?

What if she won't tell the truth?
She's not Canadian ;)


If I ask openly this might be even the last time I meet her :D

I think If I asked this question in my gyms locker room, I'd win "the incompetent guy of the year" prize :)