View Full Version : insecurities kicking in again


fosterthehuman
07-10-17, 12:12 AM
I currently live at my mom's but I'm moving out by next week. Sometimes I go to her garage to smoke and use her bathroom when my grandma or a guest is in there. But this morning, my mom was sleeping but I had a few important things to get out of there. I knocked on the door and asked her to get some stuff and she was really ****** I went into her bathroom and turned on the faucet and she yelled at me, I slammed her bedroom door and she called me a *****. I could of used the upstairs one but I was so lazy and had to pee so bad I just tried in her bathroom first idk it was stupid of me. I asked her why she called me a ***** and she was like cause you derseve it.

My dad and I planned with family to go to this amusement park nearby. He said he wants all of us to leave his house by 11am. Well I didn't get to his apartment until a little past 1pm. My dad said it was no big deal that I ran late cause he We were just going so we can have a chance to play at the water park cause my little sister wanted to. But I still wasted a lot of time shaving my legs, my underarms even though it wasn't even that hot it was 80 degrees for only a few hours. I could have worn this dress that would have covered my underarms and I could have socks that covered my legs and I would have been on time. Plus I wasted time calling my dad and crying about what happened with my mom. I ended up taking Bart and leaving my house at 12 something but I had to take an uber and Bart and ugh. I already said sorry for being late. But I ended up snapping at my dad cause I thought about this other recent situation where I was late meeting with my dad's family:

He called me really early in the morning and asked if we could all get breakfast but I ended up getting there really late. I told dad I had to run an errand before he picked me up from my house in Oakland, they live in Union City.i actually was going to a store to find a smoke pipe. The first store I went into didn't have what I was looking for so I took an uber to another store in Berkeley and told my dad that I just needed to go to the store. I will be back in around 20 mins. So my dad shows up to my house around that time and guess what, I'm not there. My ******* forgot that I was even going to Berkeley, for some retarded reason I thought the smoke shop was in Oakland. Plus I took a pool and extra people got on. Also my uber got lost and couldn't figure out where the smoke shop was at first. Everything was going wrong but I still blame myself. Cause my dad and some of his family were outside the house but then I ended up having to meet them at the restaurant so they had to drive to San Leandro as well.

Also, there were times in the past and still times where my dad will be really late for stuff or wouldn't update me on stuff. Idk maybe somehow I adopted his trait? Idk if that makes sense

sarahsweets
07-10-17, 05:19 AM
I think being late because you got wrapped up in feelings about your mom is one thing but being late because you needed to find a smoke pipe is another.