View Full Version : Are ADDers just Adults acting like Children?
A co-worker today, made the reference that he thought ADDers acted like children in the behavor he saw in me. No immaturely but in a child like way I hold my head, my expressions, my questions that I ask all the time, my laughing easily and so on.
I'm sortof mixed how to feel about the statement. Anyone want to comment on this?
09-08-03, 04:31 PM
ADHD is a Developmental Delay. It shouldn't be an issue of character. See Sam Goldstien, Ph.D.
PS. I Don't agree with everything he says, but on this issue I agree.
Also checl out Barkley inhis The natuer of self control.
09-08-03, 04:44 PM
I wouldn't take that comment to heart.
I think everyone has an inner child. I will probably always be sort of child like. Especially since I am only 5 feet tall. Last fall I was out in my yard and someone stopped by asking if the lady of the house was home. "Ummm, that's me!".
But there could be some truth to that. The more I look at myself, the more I realize that I am behind in many ways - like I haven't quite mastered interacting with people. Sometimes I give the wrong impression.
I am 27, but I don't feel a day over 18. It is like something out of the twilight zone where everyone around me grew up, and I didn't.
Where was I the day they taught adulthood?!
I don't know why choosing not to hide emotions by facial expressions or other ways is considered child like.
I think others care too much about what others think so they don't ask certain questions and they hide ther emotions.
It all depends on what value you put to the term adulthood.
I will allways be a child at heart that delights in the simple things of life.
As ferrette1976 said "I wouldn't take that comment to heart. "
If you are doing your job to the best of your ability and sucseeding then it is none of there concern as to "How Lucky you are to have maintained the Inner Joys of childhood
There probally just jelous that they take life so seriously and that you are so relaxed and young at heart.
First off, I've always described myself as "one who takes a childish delight in everything," and I'd never want to change that. Too many people wear the "serious suit" all the time. Not that I don't have a dark side as well.... I think it's definitive of us ADDers to laugh easily, to be what could be considered overly excited or too intense according to others' standards, in a nutshell, to display behaviors associated with children.
Check out this article regarding the developmental differences between ADDults and other adults:
If the link doesn't work, go to additudemag.com, click "Ourselves" on the left side of the screen, and click the first article at the top right: "Grow Up Already!..."
Thanks, Garry! :)
Can't remember when I first found that article--last year maybe?--but I always remembered it because it opened up so many more introspective doors for me. Kind of like being diagnosed in the first place...a series of "Aha!" moments on why I did the things I did while I was [am still!] growing up. As soon as I saw this thread, I knew y'all had to have the opportunity to read that article. :D
09-08-03, 05:55 PM
I think I have a lot in common with children.
And I think that is a GOOD thing, and never want to change it.
In some ways I am Peter Pan, refusing to grow up. But in some ways I feel like I CAN'T grow up.. that if somehow I forced myself or was forced, it would kill me...
It is a rough label to wear in front of others, but quite frankly, my self esteem is strong enough, so I don't mind it in my case. I will certainly join the cause to prevent OTHER ADDers from being labelled like this if it is a problem.
Thank you Smooch! I printed it out and I found it very comforting.
I know I battle the "What do I need to be normal" voice in my head, I'm so happy to be ADD. I find others who aren't lack the humor, the joy of life. Thanks for sharing that with me and the rest of us!
first of all how do you pronounce your name
kep-pig kepp-ig ke-ppig ?
Sencond of all
you are normal its the rest of the world that doesnt have the joys of an ADD life and they are jealous and deprived
Actually I'm Kassie
Keppig is my yahoo name. :)
Grin I knew that but i keep forgetting the real names and have to refer to the ADDforums names
Ok then its pronounced k-epic (like an epic novel). Its the only german in me ;)
09-08-03, 08:19 PM
Kassie: What the co-worker said -- COULD be construed as a compliment.....hey if someone called ME childlike -- I'd say thanks....I want to stay "young-appearing" and "young-looking" for ever.....
Let's see you laugh easily, ask questions, hold your head funny:), make certain expressions.....all childlike according to his interpretation......hey maybe they're intrigued with you.....and want to know your "secret"....:)
OR is it possible that what he says simply isn't true?? That you actually are a very mature adult who acts her age......Maybe you remind him of someone possessing these idiosyncracies he claims are yours....but aren't really.....
Me? I would take the comment with a grain of salt....it's their issue...
Oh, Don't get me wrong, I have been misunderstood forever! I was just wondering if anyone else got this kind of line? I don't mind being young minded or in image. Its who I am. To change wouldn't be me. Besides what value is given to being "grown" up? To me "grown up" means you are responsible to your family, you work and provide shelter, food, medical, and nuturing to your family as well as doing your faith. If this is the definition of adult, then I am an adult. So what if I'm child like. A friend of mine once discribed this child like behavior as in elven or fairy like. ;) cute huh? :D
09-09-03, 02:49 AM
I think ADDers may age slower than "norms". I would love to see research on this, but I don't know if anyone has looked into it...
09-09-03, 03:10 AM
My guess could be either way. The slower-to-grow-up gives you advantages of less stress; but ADD'rs meds tend to work on doamine receptors...and Dopamine reduces as you get older till....well, you have have it to keep going.
When I get to a 100, I'll give you a call...and if you still want to down the BMX park, I'll make sure the rest of the gang comes along with their bikes and skateboards.
More seriously now......
When you watch children learning things, you can almost see their mind ticking over as they think things through. Adults tend to get more tunnel vision as they get older and have a large resistance to change, ending up with little ticking over.
Kassie, what your co-worker may have seen is that you are not closed to either learning new things; or thinking through problems with the child like freedom of your mind.
I know many Adults that find it hard to change the way they think; or to look at a problem from a different perspective. Children can do these thing's with ease ; and I'm guessing most ADD'rs can probably do that to from what I have read here.
Definately a curious statement and one to think about.