Does ADD make it hard to relate to other "normal people"?

It really feels like that im disconnected to other people...

I know that more people with ADD get depressed and more often and i also knew that they often had lower self-esteam. But wtf i've been hearing that all my life. I just started taking Adderall like 2 weeks ago its all going good' but i can't say the social area of my ADD is getting any better.

Sorry just a random thread, no real point other than I still feel very disconnected to other people.

OxgenThief You are normal people.
Give yourself some time with the Adderall.
Is it depression with the ADD making you feel disconnected?

OT, the feeling of being disconnected comes and goes for some.
I get that way. for me it's a defense mechanism because when I'm connected I'm damn near psychic. So, it's good to turn it off now and then.

You may be experiencing the same thing. You've just never been able to turn it off before. IMO, now you can control it instead of it controlling you.

At least, that's what taking the right meds did for me.

Try this and see if it works to help you: as you go through your routine look for someone who seems like they are trying to avoid peoples eyes and just say HI! or something to them really loud.

I was at the gas station tonight after being "disconnected" for the past two days due to work.
I was just watching those dollars roll by on the pump and when it shut off I looked 20 ft to my right at this woman who was sorta trying to avoid looking at me...and I just said "I NEVER thought it would cost me $50 to fill up a mini van!!"
We chatted for 2 minutes about essentially nothing....and she wished me luck in my day with a smile when I was leaving....and I did the same.

It doesn't take more than a second to get "jacked in" with the "normals." :D

You hit the nail right on the head. Dr. Russell Barkley said the innattentive ADHD type are ignored by society but I think it goes a little deeper then that even. ADHD regular, are rejected.

http://www.continuingedcourses.net/active/courses/course003.php

OT, I can relate. I am not sure what came first....being ignored by society or my inability to focus on society because of overwhelming demands of living with people.




At times, I have felt the influences of rejection which in turn have forced me into self imposed exile.

Yet when i come out, for example, to get gas or go to the market or come to the forums, call a friend, go to a meeting (whatever) I am reinforced by this action. People respond to me and I respond back. And for a time I am feeling supported.

My goal is always to find stategies to remind me that I am good...that I am valued. I have to find that energy from within (meds help me, as does therapy) And I need to give it freely to others (when I am able)in order for it to be returned.

A very complex and difficult but important process for me to participate especially when reminded of old, current and anticipated rejections.

There is no doubt in my mind that this is pain.

Frankly, I find many "normals" boring, but I love the ADHD ability to turn a waiting room full of isolated individuals into a group of friendly, animated, talkative people and make waiting much less boring.

I myself have a very hard time in everyday situations.Like today I have to go take my girls for theyre allergy shots and its really hard for me to feel comfortable with myself.I myself get paranoid and think everyone is staring at me,so you can imagine Im usually in arush to leave.Im usually overly friendly so I have a hard time telling if someone is being rude.Like Ive said,my fight or flight button is broken!!!LOL!!!!

I've never had a best friend so I'm not really sure how the friend thing works. Oxgen, I've been on Adderall for 10 months now and I still am not that social. It takes time.
Hand in there

I could quote from each one of these posts and say, "Yes! That's how it is."
In fact, just this week I was trying to explain it to my shrink. He then said that if I miss social cues, it makes me want to avoid social situations because experience tells me that I'll do something "odd" once again, and feel rejection again.

i can't say the social area of my ADD is getting any better.


Often the medications aren't the sole cure for this conditions of social isolation or awarkwardness... see sociliztions skills take time and energy to develope...most learn how to 'socalize" as children but the ADD distractions prevented many from learning this while growing up....now that you are aware of this area in your life than needs attention you may have to begin the learning process. I mean we usually know about please thankyou and civil requirements because our parents screamed them at us but the little nuances of friendship conversation may have esacped us. How does one learn the same way children do....started in an area where you come into contact with others on a regular basis, stores, cashiers can be a sorce of repeated contact if you shop at the same store frequently, work, and even the start you have already made here in message baords like this. Then observe others whom you view as successful. Note why do you see them as successful? While observing people in various groups look for hints of common behavior, social unspoken rules, body language, flows of conversation. Children learn by observation, then by trial and error, in steps over time, as do we adults.....


As children do not learn to drive cars two weeks after they learn to walk you will not be a social butterfly the first week it will take time and effort as previously suggested.

Also note your personality (look for others who share simular styles but are socially where you wish to go), look at all the different social style, and note your personal preferences . Are you more comfortable amoung people who are out going or shy, do you like lots of surrounding activity or do you prefer quieter enviroments, Part of socilization includes self realization and acceptence.

My nickname at work is "Crazy Lady"! I am full of energy and hardly ever in a bad mood. Some people at work like me others look at me like I am nuts. I let things build up inside of me until I cry. Crying is frowned upon at work but at least I don't scream and hell. Any suggestions on how to stop crying when I get upset?

If Im crying you better get out of the way!!!LOL!!! When I get extremely mad I cry.I cry because they made me so mad!!! Back in my younger days I would be fighting some poor girl and tears would be flowing,I wasnt loosing so it wasnt because I was hurt.Its just a emotional overload and it just comes out.Its much deeper than what you think,its everything coming out at once.Enough of that,making new friends is time consuming and it takes work on both parts to get to know each other and your boundries.Most ADDers barely can find time for themselves or what they are feeling for that 5 min.LOL!!!!

Johna

Crying is a natural stress reliever. You might try, running, jogging, or a workout to relieve stress so you won't need to cry so often.

Me :D


My nickname at work is "Crazy Lady"! I am full of energy and hardly ever in a bad mood. Some people at work like me others look at me like I am nuts. I let things build up inside of me until I cry. Crying is frowned upon at work but at least I don't scream and hell. Any suggestions on how to stop crying when I get upset?