View Full Version : Coaching needs to be more than an occational phone call

09-18-05, 09:19 PM
As someone who has interest in being a coach, I would need to make it something where the client can depend upon my services whenever they are needed. While I am completely in favor of proper compensation, those in the business of helping of others service need to look beyond the dollar signs. I would extend this to all areas of the health "industry".

The best scenario would be to live close enough to meet with the person and to get to know them, and get them to know the coach. There needs to be trust on both ends. The client would need to truly feel there is at least one person they can fall back on when they feel lost. Anything less than this, depending on the competence of the client, would be to fall far short of the coaches usefulness.

I just think there is a complete disconnect for adult ADDers and the medical community. I truly believe this is because it is not profitable enough for them to help us--unless they are able to extend some of their services offered to the children. For all the books now published about AD/HD, I would think many more resources existed for individuals to get help.

Anyway, part of our delemmas are a sign of the times: in that the rest of society is too busy to help those who cannot keep up with the pace, and the few who do offer help thinking that problems are solved by throwing us a few pills or giving out instructions on how to organize our lives. A person needs to feel their offerings to society of use to others for them to have the confidence they need to be motivated.

09-18-05, 11:10 PM
What you are describing sounds more like having a personal assistant than a coach. The role of a coach is not for a client to become dependent on him or her. An ADD Coach and client form a partnership. Though the actual phone calls usually take place only once a week the coaching process does not end once the phone call ends. A well trained ADD Coach helps the client during the phone call and email check-in with develop skills to be independently successful between sessions.

I think the problem with the lack of help has more to do with professionals not understanding and being educated about ADD than not being to make money off of Adults with ADD. The is a huge market for Adult ADD in the medical area. A recent study just reported that more adults are currently being prescribed medication for adult ADD than Children.

The fee scale that ADD Coaches set up isn't an easy thing. If coaches fees are too high than many who can't afford the fees will be turned away. If ADD Coaches fees are too low then many will also be turned off because they will wonder why the fee IS so low.

09-19-05, 01:16 AM
I guess what I was trying to imply above was for a client to be allowed the option of talking to their coach at specific times when nothing seems to be going right. There can be the weekly scheduled contacts, but there will always be times when issues come up where there is nobody to talk to.

I had a moment, last week, where everything was going wrong, and all of my supposed friends seemed to be "too busy" to even talk to me--and my counselor was on vacation. Those are the moments I just want to go hide in a cave somewhere and forget the world. It would have been nice for me to be able to call someone to get some positive feedback.

I ask the specialists that I see why more research isn't being done. They don't know, is their response. Why aren't there more programs to help the adults that didn't get help when we were small? I don't know. Do you know of anyone doing studies on adults with ADD? Not that I am aware of. I used to tell counsellors that I wanted to do work where I can help others in their struggles. Why did they not know anything about ADD Coaching (or suggest this if they did know about it), of which I could have spent a number of years training to do that? All of my efforts are met by resistence at every step. Then, some years pass and I find out that there was something I could have done, whether it was taking a particular med., getting documentation so that I could get assistance finding a job, or getting involved in a particular career. It gets so frustrating, I am no longer surprised by others who give up the fight.

10-16-05, 06:19 AM
Some Coaches are in contact with their client more than once a week. There are also some who offer spot coaching or coaching on demand. It all depends on the the coach. As a an ADD Coach I my clients have a set time where we talk. I't usually once a week but in the begining I have started out with some clients talk twice a week.

I do think that have set times is very important it helps with time management and boundaries issue. Also, besides going crazy if I was availible to my clients 24/7 it would also make then dependent on me. The main goal of ADD Coach and others in the human services field is to help clients become successful independently.

A coach might help you come up with strategies for you to solve those issues on your own. You could even write down the issue that is affecting you and bring them up in your next session.

Also don't under emstimate the power of a support community like ADD Forums. You might not have coach on call 24/7 but there's a pretty good chance there are people here to support you most times or the day or night.

The good news is that there is a lot of increasing support and research about Adult ADD. Hopefully in time all people with ADD will be able to get the help they deserve. Groups like ADDA ( have been doing a lot of help Adults with ADD. Those of us who have struggled and are struggling trying to get help are also helping others by speaking out about our experiences.

10-16-05, 12:38 PM
The fee scale that ADD Coaches set up isn't an easy thing. If coaches fees are too high than many who can't afford the fees will be turned away. If ADD Coaches fees are too low then many will also be turned off because they will wonder why the fee IS so low.

Really, you want to pay coaches a decent wage...even well, so that good ones continue to stay in the field. As a society we should pick up the tab because ultimately a functioning ADHDer is paying taxes and not incurring further expenses for society. It is also the humane thing to do. Currently I see this as near impossible in the good ol' U S of A.

Ideally, access should be immediate...say within 24 hours. Regular people can work themselves into a lather....double so for ADHD people, there coping strategies could very well be handicapped....think poor executive functioning skills. Their window of time is also much narrower so that they may not see a problem until it is actually wapping them on the head.

It is worthy goal to slowly extinguish coaches and you can make a case that over time, say as ADHers approach middle age, an ADHDer may slowly develop these skills. Then again, someone with a severe case of ADHD may never get to that stage and have compounding and comorbid disorders like ODD, Anxiety, or Depression. The need may always be there.

10-16-05, 11:14 PM
If a person even one with AD/HD can not wait 24 hours than maybe the person needs something instead of / in addition to Coaching. Part of ADD Coaching is to help people with ADD develop skills and live in the real world. Time management and boundaries are 2 issues that many people with ADD need help with.

I think being there for at a client's beck and call can really set them up for failure. That is not helping them realize boundaries or improve time managemant. If their coach doesn't set up boundaries with them how will they deal with others in the real world who don't give them instant gratification.

Also the role of a coach is not to solve their clients problems. It's to help them develop their own ways of doing things and support them in doing so.

10-17-05, 12:19 AM
At home I preach the same things over and over to my 3 ADHD girls(11,13 and 17). They all have planners, yet still things pop up and I am constantly helping them getting things done. I guess you could imply that I have taught them to become dependent on dad. I look for the simpler answer. They don't think ahead to some degree because they haven't reached that developmental stage due to ADHD. That is all tied into excutive functions.

My girls would all have what would be considered mild ADHD. I would think that an adult with severe ADHD may never be able to plan into the future by themselves. You throw in Depression/ Anxiety and perhaps an addiction and can you really expect all these folks to become fully independent? They occupy our streets, our jails, and our mental institutions.

You help/accommodate according to need.