This is going to be a bit long but it's something that has been really heavy on my mind lately and I just need to know if it's just ME or if other ADD/ADHD mummys struggle with it to....please guys and women who aren't mummy's feel free to give advice, your point of view whatever.....

~a little bit about me~ I'm 24 (almost 25) yrs old I have ADD,OCD and am boarderline.. I'm a single mummy, I have a DD thats 2 yrs old. She has ADHD for sure and if you read in the parenting section she needs to see a doc. about some other issues. Shes a gem and I love her and I wouldn't know what to do without her.~

So here is my questions....I have a few friends (non-adhd) that have told me i'm not a good mummy and i'd kinda like your point of views....here a few reasons why they think this about me....

* I have my DD go to the babysitters house every Saturday night and then she takes my DD to church where I pick her up. That way I can have a weekend night to myself to do whatever I want to do. My DD loves it over there cause the lady has like every Disney movie and she's nice....I wouldn't allow my DD to go somewhere that I felt was un-safe.

* My older sis and her hubby like to take my DD over night about once a week to their house then they bring her to daycare....I don't mind, they want to spend time with her thats fine. She loves them has fun with them and will tell me all about her night there...

* I don't give my DD a bath every freaken day. And in all honestly I don't understand why people do this...yes in the summer she did get a bath 4 days out of the 7 in a week. And in the winter she gets a bath 4 out of the 7 days. I don't have the energy to do this every night. I think it's great that people can do this everyday and still have time to do other things ... but when I come home I want to play with her or give her dinner or whatever...then she goes to bed...and I can breathe....YES when her feet are dirty or what ever she'll get a "bath" in the sink...she loves this and she's never dirty, or smells.

* I don't make food for her....no she doesn't starve...but i'd much rather open a can of olives and have cheese and other finger foods then make a mess in the kitchen....she doesn't mind and we sit watching her movies and have our finger foods....I was told I wasn't a good mother cause I didn't actually make my child food...so I said (joking of course) "isn't that what her daycare does...makes her 2 hot meals each day for the 5 days that she's there??" the lady wasn't smiles after that....I thought it was funny though. I don't really like to eat myself and so for me to eat I'd rather have finger foods then a full blown meal cause those scare me ( I struggle with an eating disorder).

* She doesn't have a routine....OK first of all she's never had one second she'd switch it on me in a heart beat....she does have things she'll do right when she gets home ... (OCD) other than that she's a whatever child...doesn't care...she's like me...but then thats bad cause my other friend said that since she doesn't have a nightly routine like bath, books, singing...etc...that she'll never sleep well...my child sleeps just fine...and she's happy to read alone in her bed...she doesn't like me to read to her unless she says so!!

Okay okay this is super long...but really the list goes on .... I know my child loves me and I know I love her...I just don't fine the "normal" parenting stuff important... and yeah I don't see her a lot cause I work full time she's at daycare full time but really if I was a stay at home mum...I'd be drinking up a storm or going crazy....I like my time away from her and she's always happy to see me pull up to get her after work...and the weekends...that two days with her is the perfect amount....the weekends we'll go to the Zoo just us two or I'll invite a couple of other little kids...and we'll have fun...we go to the parks...we do loads of stuff together on the weekends...so it's not like we are just doing nothing....

Does all this make me a bad mum? My few "friends" seem to think so...My friend thats ADD is the same as me....we love spending time together with our girls cause we'll do our best to make them play upstairs and laugh at the fact that we wouldn't make good homemakers!!! :)

Advice, imput??? Am I just a crazy mummy? or is this something that comes up often for anyone else??? Oh the other mums that think I'm a bad mum...one doesn't work the other works part time and their HUBBYS work full time....I don't have anyone else.. I'm mummy/daddy I'm her everything...thats HARD....even though i'm at work doesn't mean i'm taking a break....i'm still busy trying to make money to feed my child and make sure she has an at least okay life. :) I even work half days on Saturdays house cleaning so that way we can have some extra fun money.....

ARG....sorry it's long...thanks for getting through this...:rolleyes:

Your daughter is two and has "ADHD for sure?" I wonder about that...it's very, very difficult to establish the diagnosis that young...has a psychiatrist made that diagnosis? Second opinion? I'd be wary.

I don't see any evidence of anything wrong in this parenting...the child is 2 years old, and shouldn't have routines outside of dinner times and bedtimes...and even those may be waved. Sending her to a babysitter's is a good thing. Bathing 4 of 7 times a week? I didn't bathe daily until I was 12 or so, or when I was dirty or sweaty. I'd normally bathe every other day as a child. Plus, you having to do that makes it much more difficult. Make food for her? She's two years old! She can hardly appreciate that.

Perhaps I have a bad view on what a parent _should_ be, because I've spent years working with what parents _shouldn't_ be. You aren't that. You seem to truly care for your daughter, and the fact that you're even considering this shows that you're probably not a bad parent. Your daughter is not neglected or abused, she eats, she's bathed, provided the necessities of life, and from what it sounds, even some of the perks. You working extra so she can have 'fun' money is something most parents wouldn't do.

I question the need for psychiatric diagnosis, but recommend going for it. ADHD is very, very difficult to establish at this age, as is OCD. OCD is marked by obsessive and intrusive thoughts which severely disturb the individual...I don't think a 2 year old can have that very well...I am not a doctor, and I don't know the child personally, but I can say that a two year old should behave pretty much how you described, regardless of being ADHD or OCD.

Doing things "right when she gets home" is more her learning routine systems and learning to check surroundings than an OCD symptom, I'd think. Overactivity and inattentivity are normal in children of this age...this is why it is absolutely important to make sure only a professional makes a diagnosis like this...please don't assume your child has a disorder. It is natural to think that way, because individuals with psychiatric disorders learn to think in disorders, so to speak; every behavior becomes a symptom. It is important not to think like this though, especially with a young child, who has every chance of being 'normal.'

Remember, though there is a genetic link, even if both parents carry ADHD, it is a recessive trait, meaning there is still only a <25% chance of a child actually exhibiting the disorder.

Are you a bad parent? I don't believe so, you care for your child. But I do recommend not assuming there are conditions based on symptoms. I would in all honesty even question a doctor who would say that a 2 year old has ADHD. 4 years old is the youngest I've ever seen it diagnosed, and even that was, in my opinion, clinically misguided.

OCD is a very involved disorder...I know, I have it (in partial remission, hoorah). It's a lot more than just "compulsively doing things" or "obsessing about things." It requires obsessive anxiety which is almost literally debilitating and very, very unnerving, and the formation of compulsive behaviors which alleviate that anxiety either directly or via "magical thinking." A 2 year old is barely capable of linguistic thought, and is just beginning to develop vocabulary and understand that they can affect the world. With that limited cognitive capacity, it's almost impossible to be ABLE to worry in the way required by OCD, and without an understanding that we can affect the world around us, it's virtually impossible to develop a compulsion to alleviate anxiety.

I imagine her doing certain activities upon entering the house is probably resultant from her learning that she can affect the world.

It's important to note that you're not a bad parent or a bad person for thinking there are disorders here; having had psychiatric diagnoses yourself, you're likely to think of behaviors as symptoms, regardless of what those behaviors are. Anyone who works in or deals with psychopathology regularly does so; in fact, clinicians are trained in identifying what is normal after they learn what is abnormal, because once you learn what's abnormal, you have a natural tendency to assume every behavior is a symptom.

I think you're doing a great job as a parent, from what it seems. If you are seriously concerned that there are psychiatric issues in your daughter, though, take her to see a professional; preferably one who does not know your case history, because that could bias them. And, if that doctor says there is something, I'd still get a second opinion: your daughter is very young to be making any diagnoses aside from PDD/MR type disorders.

Wow FlyGurl! ...You are doing a great Job gal!

A lot of Non-ADDers haven't a clue what it's like to have ADHD
A lot of Parents with Partners and support, don't know what it's like to be a Single Parent, having the full responsibility of a mother/father to that child/ren.
Being an ADDer and a Single Parent isn't easy... I know that for a fact!
I'm not too sure who is diagnosed with ADHD..You or your Daughter and i'm not sure what 'DD' refers to.. I hope you can enlighten me :confused:

I'm a single Parent of 5 Children... 3 of which have ADHD and Conducts Disorder...
I have only recently been diagnosed with ADHD... i'm on my second attempt of med's, but,all my life, i've been a raw undiagnosed ADDer, living day to day, with all the difficulties that having ADHD causes... But somehow, i survived and here i am,to tell the story LOL

My Eldest child is now 16 years old and besides being a pain in the *** Teenager, he also has his ADHD and Conducts Disorder, for me to deal with!!!..(Obviously, it's hard for him to deal with, but harder for his 4 siblings and myself, as he abuses us daily!).

You are doing a lot for your daughters happiness..
Spending Quality time and giving her space to see other people, that can only be a good thing for her and You.

You do need time for yourself, or how are you going to deal with the stress..(You need to be healthy, as You are the soul giver of love and security for your daughter).

Your non-ADHD friends don't understand... but then, a lot of non ADDers don't understand.. If you had a leg missing,they would be able to see that and realize why you can't run!... But ADHD is invisible to a lot of People...(Most people really!).

I could go on to say more, but i'm in a bit of a hurry to go out...Wow! freedom for the evening!!! LOL


FlyGurl, Who has ADHD? and what does 'DD' mean...

I'll get back to you later..
Hugs (You deserve it!!) Karen:)

Wow, thanks for the replys they are both helpful and encouraging.....

KMiller
I'm just assuming that my child has ADHD...I'm not saying that she does...and I don't want to copy paste my post about her other issues so if you'd like to know more about her then there is a post in the general parenting section about her and her issues....I'm not going to make a 100% decision that she's a full "case" till she is a few years older...and i'm not hopping that she is because i know what it's like to struggle with my ADD and OCD....I've had them my whole life.. and needless to say it hasn't been easy for me to handle. That is good advice not to say anything about my issues to her doctor....I have never said anything about my boarderline to anyone besides my best friend....just because people would think i'm crazy...:eek: duh!!! :)

At least other people don't see the need to bathe their kids all the time... their kids...hello dirt should be their middle names!!

karennerak WOW!!! I'm impressed!!! if I lived close to you I'd watch your kids so you could be an adult!!!!! And yes your right...they (the people that have that special gift of TWO adults in the house) really have no clue what I go through....and I just have ONE kid....wow five....you should be having mothers day every day...what a blessing you are to your kids!!!

I have ADD and DD means dear daughter.

Thank you both again so much...I really love to hear other peoples point of views...even if I take the advice or not....it's good to just know and have that information in my mind where i can use it later....well that is if I can find it in my mind....i'd have to search... :D

Hi Flygurl:

Sorry in advance for the lack of colorful fonts... :)

Sounds like you are doing great. Unless you are leaving out something about letting her juggle chainsaws, sounds good.

Schedules for a 2 year-old? Wait until preschool for that stuff.

Baths? 4x a week is fine. Our son only started daily bathing at 7.

Nutrition -- get some fruits and veggies down every once in a while and you're probably doing better than most.

Since you're a single parent, getting some help every once in a while seems quite sound. You can't be a good mom if you keel over.

Keep it up, and don't let what the world thinks get you down.

Looks to me like she's perfectly normal based on the other thread...keep an eye out, but from your descriptions, she's just fine. :)

I apologize for posting in the Women's forum here by the way, I hope it's not a problem.

Oh my Goodness, just because your friends have different view on parenting doesn't make them any better or worse parents. They are just different. And to be honest there is no way of knowing how you are doing until the child grows up. We are all different and need different things from parents. So even the most knowledgeable parents might screw up a child that needs special attention. You love your child and love spending time with her. And that's what matters. Your kid needs attention and love. And most parents who are so concerned with other issues don't have enough time to spend with their children. So you are doing great.
Leaving a child over at babysitters/sister's house. WEll, you do need time for you, if you had someone with you, you'll be able to go away and spend time iwth yourself, but you don't, but you still need the time. So that's great. I remember being a kid and wanting to stay over at other people's houses because i wanted to see how other families were (i was always very curious about seeing people in their every day life, not what they put on up for a show when they have guests..).
I too hated showering every day. I remember pretending that I was showering because i was too tired to actually do it. If you are bath your child in the sink that's good enough. your child is clean and that's good. And if you have time to give her a bath 4 times a week, that's still pretty good. I remember only taking them 3 times when I was 6 to 12 or so. So no worries in that department. Kids don't have to be squeaky clean they have to enjoy taking bath!
Well some people believe that routine is a good thing, and it is when you are trying to organize to do something (when talking about going to school they need a routine) but before that..at 2!! there are no real routines needed. It's actually good that she likes falling asleep by herself. It's better than her not wanting to go to sleep at all. If she falls asleep by herself that means that she spent enough time with you not to feel like she dind't get any at all. I saw it on a parenting show, that kids cry and dont want to sleep when they want to spend more time with you. But you spend lots of time with your kid. So that's all good. The only concern is finger food. She is not old enough to appreciate nicely cooked meal but you do want her nutrition to be good. Finger foods don't provide enough nutrients needed for proper growth and development. So you need to add a lot of variety and nutritious foods. you need to teach her and develop good habbits from young age. Or you might risk raising a kid with unheatlhy food habbits who will end up having health problems. Of course i see lots of parents around who are not too concerned iwth that, but I think it's better to prevent something than to heal it. So I guess that's the only thing that you could change for your child AND YOURSELF. if you know what you are eating you wont' havve to worry about it. I have slight food disorder simply because osmetimes after I eat i feel VERY fat and i don't want to eat for a long time afterwards. So I am learned a lot about nutrition and when I am eating properly and I know that it's good for my bosy I actually feel happier. So good luck to both of you :)

My kids are 7 and 8 and I am grateful they are old enough now to go take their own showers or otherwise they would be lucky to have a bath 4 times a week lol. As for food,,,, I am also grateful for lunchables and kid cuisine or otherwise they would be eating who knows what. I have my kids with me all the time except when they are in school but I still don't think I spend enough time with them. We spend time together but I am mostly preoccupied. So to heck with what anyone thinks of you as a mother,,, only you can decide if you are doing what you need and as long as child protective services is not in your life,,,, it is no one's buisness. No one is perfect and no matter how much you may want to do everything right as a mother,,, it is not gonna happen,,, this is real life. Don't worry about it.

It is common for a young mother to feel insecure about parenting and your friends are being insensitive by judging your style.

There is no one right way to raise a child.
You have named some improvements you would like to make and that shows that you are thinking critically and re-evaluating your daughter's needs regularly.

It sounds to me like you are doing many of the right things.

Flygurl,

I want to mention something that no one else seems to have hit on yet. For some reason parenting in our society seems to have become a competetive sport with parents all clamoring to best one another. It's ridiculous! The truth of the matter is no child ever looks back on childhood and says, "Even though I knew my mom loved me I really think she should have made sure my hair was shapooed correctly over spending time loving and playing with me!"

Your daughter is still too young for you to be aware of the level of competition that comes with school. ACK! All the dutiful stay-at-home moms clamoring to sign up for who can bring the most beautiful and nutritious snacks to little Sally's Kindergarten classroom, all the harried working moms feeling less than whole in the mothering department. It is CRAZY!

I should say that I am a stay-at-home mom, I have ADD as does my oldest daughter, I also have 2 other daughters. My girls are ages 9, 7 & 5. I have been a Girl Scout leader & I have killed myself making all those beautiful, delicious & nutritious snacks so that I could feel as though I made the grade in Parenting 101. My husband has now been deployed to Iraq for almost 9 months and in these last nine months I have come to realize that I don't really give a good s**t what other parents think. I certainly don't have the energy level required to run around and volunteer for everything under the sun just to prove that I am a dedicated & loving parent. I am now just enjoying being a mom and spending time with my kids. I NEVER enjoyed all the hours planning and preparing for stuff I really didn't want to do anyway. I am ok with the fact that just making sure the laundry is clean and that the kids eat dinner is all that I am capable of. I have learned to be comfortable with myself.

I do want to say thank you to all of those moms that are truly dedicated and love going the extra mile for their children and the children of others. Also, kudos to the working moms that display such poise at having to divide their attention between work and home, you are strong and amazing woman.

One more thing, Flygurl, you should never feel guilty for taking time out for yourself. You are lucky to have the resources to allow you to hire a babysitter and family that are both willing and able to give you time to yourself. Where I am not a single mom in the true sense of the word, I find that these days my husband and I spend more time apart than together and I am playing the single parent roll more often. I am envious of you really. I would give my right arm for a few nights a week to myself! You are doing a good job.

There is a happy medium for everything.I am always second guessing myself and worrying if Im not being good enough.Raising and shapeing little humans can be absolutely mentally draining.I say to myself when I feel like this that no one is perfect and everyone is diffrent.As long as they are full happy and healthy(which sounds like your duaghter is)your doing just fine.Another thing,she needs all the people she can to love her and shape her positively into a young woman.So, going with your family and spending time with people who really love her and want to be with her is awsome!!!!Not to mention really good for her.You too,your a single mom and you need adult time too,besides work.I know that!!!!! Im a stay at home mom which means,I bathe,do my hair,go to the bathroom with a baby on my lap!!!!LOL!!!!!That means I get no days away ever.There is a happy medium,I just have to find it.You and your DD sound just fine to me.

Wow...Thank you all so much. I just got to work a bit ago and it was so nice to open this thread up and read all your post...some again...but thank you again....I feel a lot better knowing that I am doing the best job I can...and I really want to say that those of you taking care of more than one child and being a single mummy or a military mummy your amazing!!!! and all those mummys that can do all the stuff I just can't seem to do...I want to get your strength :) thanks guys and gals for the replys ... they have helped me out more than you realize!! :D

FlyGurl,

Generally, I'd say you are doing fine. Keep in mind that some of what you are doing right at this moment may need to change as she gets older; but for now, I see no real problem. If she is ADHD, you may need to work harder at establishing some sort of routine when she's older, because that will probably help her...but I'm sure you know that.

My one concern (for when she's older) is that you don't want to make her food. Finger food is probably just fine now, as long as you make sure that's nutritious (like she eats well with a fork anyway?) but you don't want to pass on your attitudes about food to her. I hope that doesn't come across as rude, but you don't want her to suffer with ED too, right? You might want to talk to someone about your issues with food.

And making meals can be exhausting, so there's ways to make it easier. For example, you can get a "crockpot," which is a slow-cooker that you can just leave on the counter. There's about a million crockpot recipes out there to try, and you can have it cooking all day while you're at work, and then it's ready to go in the evening when you get home!

FlyGurl,

You, my darlin, Are a wonderful parent and mummy for even worrying about being a good parent. I am 25 and single mum to my 4 year old who has adhd (have been single from the start) and i am in suspitions of myself having add. I know exactly where your coming from. My friends say the same damn things and its so frustrating for someone elses opinion makes you think less of your abilities ( i have a few times too). If your daughter is HAPPY, FED, CLOTHED, and has love all around her (from yourself). She is in the BEST care that she could ever have. You are doing a fantastic job. Everyone else can stick their parenting issues up there u know what.
Best of luck for everything. The other reply's above are right on too. I hope they have helped you and given you the confidence that you needed and were searching for.
BIG HUGS!! mwa

One of the most important things you can do for your child is to surround them with people who love them and it sounds like do that. you spend fun time with her which is something lots of parents have a hard time doing.
My kids often spend a lot of time with other parts of my family and I'm of the opinion that you are creating deep family bonds and learnng to be independent. I spent tons of time with close friends and neighbors while by dad was in the hopital 120 miles away with cancer. did I not love my mom or think she was a bad mom, NO! She's still one of my best friends.
Don't let people who don't understand your situation tell you your a bad mom. If you choose to remain friends with them I'd explain that your take on parenting is different as is your situation. As for baths, actually daily baths is not as great for kids as some parents think. The soaps can wipe away all the natural oils that keep skin from drying out...especially in the winter.
AS for food...even dried cereal is great..add some hotdogs or lunch meat for protien. As long as it's not a steady diet of junk food your probably doing a good job. Just knowing what your deficits are and compensating for them..like breakfast and lunch at daycare is a good thing.
Your child may even grow to be more confortable with diversity than these other parents kids. A lot of kids have never been anywhere overnight without a parent when they are in first or second grade. They don't know that not all households are the same. Your daughter is getting to integrate that concept form a young age.
Quit dwelling on what's not done and focus on what you do that is good for your daughter. Your doing a good job.

I'm not a parent, but I took care of my then-5 year old niece for about 7 months when my sister got sick-- and I learned quickly that one of the most important things was for her to feel safe and loved-- sounds like your daughter has that-- and not just from you, but from the babysitter and your family! Sounds great! I loved spending nights at my aunt's or grandparents houses when I was a kid, and I'm still close to them.

The one thing I do feel a bit bad about was that when I took over for my sister (btw, she's fine now :)) I had just turned 23, and didn't really know how to cook much--so I fed my niece whatever I could manage, while also going to work..... though I didn't notice it at the time, my niece lost wieght while I took care of her... so just make sure your doc knows her diet, and he/she's OK with it.

But overall, sounds like you've managed to create a great environment for your girl!

Don't stress too much over the finger foods either. I have a 16 year old that has always had "cooked" meals and she's still the pickiest kid I've ever seen. Just make sure your child get's variety and if possible, go with the prepared meals in the freezer section at the store. It's amazing how much your child will change from today to tomorrow.....you're doing great!

God Bless

Dawn

I just found this thread, but in case you're still doubting yourself, I wanted to say something.

First, ADD & OCD are probably not the only cause of your parenting style. I am happily married to a man without disorders and our parenting styles are very similar. And, by the way, similar to yours.

Baths: My boys are 5 and 8. They are lucky to get a bath 3 times a week! Yes, we bathe them when they need it, but kids IMO don't need to be squeaky clean all the time! We are constantly making them wash their hands and faces and they are sick less than most kids their ages.

Routine: overrated. Our kids have a routine, but it's extremely flexible. My 8-year-old is ADD (no hyperactivity) and my boys are VERY well-behaved and well-adjusted. Despite his "disability", my oldest is scoring off-the-charts academically. Our lack of strict routine has probably contributed to his success; it certainly didn't cause his ADD.

Food: whether or not you cook is not the issue. As long as your daughter is eating quality food it doesn't matter if it's hot or cold. Does she like cheese? Good. It provides a great deal of her nutrition. Fats are important for children because they need them to develop neural connections. Just make sure they're unsaturated fats. Olives are great. At this age, just make sure she drinks a couple of cups of milk each day and the majority of her nutritional needs are taken care of! Listen to her pediatrician. If HE/SHE says she's doing well, it doesn't matter what your friends think.

Babysitting: If you don't take care of yourself, how can you expect to take care of her? Besides, it's great for kids to spend time with others, kids and adults. Kids need different environments and experiences. THAT is how they learn!

My opinion from your post is that you are a terrific parent. Don't worry about what other parents think. When those critical friends of yours have obnoxious, uncontrollable 7-year-olds and your child is a happy, healthy, little angel, you'll have the last laugh.

You've got the right idea, and I have the kids to prove it :D.

Barb

I haven't read this whole thread in detail, but it brought up a memory of a book I had seen discussed on some talk show. Couldn't tell you when or what, think I was channel surfing, but they had the author on and if memory serves me it seemed to fit this thread, so I did a little search to see if I could figure out what the book was and I think it must have been this (found it on this Amazon site):
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/tg/stores/detail/-/books/1405051922/reviews/202-4843198-6432607): Confessions of a Bad Mother: In the Aisle by the Chill Cabinet No-one Can Hear You Scream


From the Inside Flap
Are you a super-duper, totally fulfilled mother twenty-four hours a day? Do you give your children home-made risotto, help them with their homework, read them a fairy tale and sing them to sleep? Or do you give them chicken nuggets in front of the telly, herd them into bed and slump down exhausted with a drink?

Do you feel that other mothers are 'doing it properly' while you're getting it All Wrong?

if you try your best but frequently feel a failure, if you - or your children - are in any way imperfect, then join the club: the Bad Mother's Club. Stephanie Calman has broken every rule and done it all 'wrong'. From giving birth with her pants on to making her kids watch more telly, she has persistently defied all accepted wisdom and professional advice.

Outrageous, funny and hideously true, Confessions of a Bad Mother is her story. Read it, and know - at last - that you are Normal. About the Author
Stephanie Calman is married with two children. So far, she seems to have got away with it.


Anyhow, just thought maybe you'd enjoy knowing that someone's actually written a book pretty much about just the same stuff.

-Sonow

thanks I think i'm gonna try to buy the book...just by reading your post I know i'd like it... :)



so a bit of an up-date.....

1. my DD is with me now just about 24/7. she did go to her great-grandma's house on saturday but other than that she's always around me

2. sister once again decided to watch her a couple of weeks ago and then told me that she just didn't want to have her over night and they'd bring her home at 8:30-9pm...didn't get her back till 10pm and never once called to tell me... i had to call them...and they seemed annoyed...

3. my parents haven't wanted to see her for over a month now...they don't care and i'm done trying to "help" them be grandparents to my child...so they will no longer see her....the holidays are coming up thats when they can see her for half the day then thats it....i don't see the point in pushing my angel on my family....so i'm going to the other extreem...they just can't see her at all....not like it makes a difference they never call to ask about her...

she doesn't have a babysiter anymore....just me and my FH and his family... thats all we need though...he's good about helping me with her when he gets off work or whatnot....he loves her very much and likes knowing he'll get the chance to be her daddy....

it's really to bad that my family thinks so poorly of me that they wouldn't want to spend time with their only grandchild....but like i said before...it's their lose.....once she gets older and doesn't have that special bond with them like she already has with my FH family they will feel terrible...oh well...

she's doing great though, taking showers...she loves them..plays forever and washes her own hair and body....she's eating better...and being a sweety... growing up...its so much fun but i miss her baby ways to. :)

hope everything goes well--your daughter's lucky you love her so much! :)