This is what happened I moved from my home town to ohio for three months and when i was here I had some really good friends i mean i spent everyday and night with them. Well, when i come back they are fixing to move and they did. well, something was different when i came back. we didn't spend any time together hardly and i felt them starting to slip away from me. Well, they kept blowing me off and i got mad i saw my sister husband hit her and i called them cuz i didn't know who else to call well they didn't pick up and so i got mad and said on there answering machine " well, i just saw my sister get hit by my brother in law. but i guess you are to F*cking busy to answer your phone. So then Samantha my sister talk to mariah(my friend) sister in law ans she started to talk some mess to my sister. Yeah like i am scared of them. lol. But then i talk to mariah husband and he said that she just got used to me not being around and that she wanted it to stay like that. She didn't want me around anymore. So that kinda hurt but it was the truth now she is going to end our very good friendship over some bullsh*t. and i am mad. I don't hang out with a lot of poeple and so i value the friends i have and now i am down more than ever. i odn't know what to do. :(

Shella,

Sorry to see you are sad kiddo. I was browsing around for a little while today.
I had popped in to check my messages, and send one back to your mom.

I hope you and Mariah are able to work it out. Maybe after you let it cool off for awhile, you can meet with her on nuetral (sp) ground and find out what happened.

It should be you and her. Not her hubby and you sis involved. Then everyone knows what each other says, nothing is misrepresented.

I hate to hear crap going on with Sam.
Let me know how it goes.
Hope all goes well for you?
Hang in there.

Miss ya,
Lova ya
Hope

Um. Did you ask Mariah why she has decided that she doesn't 'want you around anymore?' That might be a place to start; keep an open mind and try to listen to her, and consider what she says before you respond. Remember, even if you don't like what she says, or don't think her reason(s) are good, she is entitled to her feelings. If you feel that you are going to respond angrily or defensively, say that you want to think about what she says and talk more about it later.

It is never easy to 'lose' a friend; it hurts, and it's confusing. If you have done something to cause this, talking to her will give you a chance to rectify the situation, if possible. If it's not possible, you can consider what you might want to do differently in future friendships; it could be making a change in your behavior, or it might be choosing your friends in a different way.

One though I had after reading your post is that you don't sound hurt; you sound angry. Expressing anger by using profanity can be offputing for lots of people, and can make them less inclined to want to talk about what's going wrong. Many of us go straight to anger when we feel hurt, but the anger is often based on assumptions rather than facts. We want to blame the person who hurt us, because we think that it's intentional....instead of trying to find out what's really going on. Sometimes people are so preoccupied with their own problems that they are unintentionally thoughtless or inconsiderate. Sometimes we ourselves have unintentionally done something thoughtless or inconsiderate, and our friend finds it easier to avoid us rather than tell us what's going on.

Keep an open mind. It will help not only with this friendship, but other relationships as well.

Good luck!

Hey Michelle
I'm sorry to hear that you've lost a friend....I KNOW what thats like, I've lost heaps of friends because of trivial sh*t.

The fact her husband said that she got used to you NOT being around would show that she had all intentions of ending the friendship with you and obviously there were problems within that friendship that she didn't bother communicating with you when she should have done so, the fact this person kept "blowing" you off should have told you that they were no longer interested in the friendship and you should have not have bothered chasing them up....if they're not going to be a good friend and they're not going to tell you whats wrong then thats their problem and they should have came to you.

This is what happened I moved from my home town to ohio for three months and when i was here I had some really good friends i mean i spent everyday and night with them. Well, when i come back they are fixing to move and they did. well, something was different when i came back. we didn't spend any time together hardly and i felt them starting to slip away from me. Well, they kept blowing me off and i got mad i saw my sister husband hit her and i called them cuz i didn't know who else to call well they didn't pick up and so i got mad and said on there answering machine " well, i just saw my sister get hit by my brother in law. but i guess you are to F*cking busy to answer your phone. So then Samantha my sister talk to mariah(my friend) sister in law ans she started to talk some mess to my sister. Yeah like i am scared of them. lol. But then i talk to mariah husband and he said that she just got used to me not being around and that she wanted it to stay like that. was the She didn't want me around anymore. So that kinda hurt but it truth now she is going to end our very good friendship over some bullsh*t. and i am mad. I don't hang out with a lot of poeple and so i value the friends i have and now i am down more than ever. i odn't know what to do. :(

okay the first reply i like and the second was cool.

Crybaby...I should mention that I recently also "lost" a friend. We used to drive around together, and be kinda flirtatious. I knew that he didn't want a 'relationship' and although for awhile I thought I did, I decided that I'd rather have him for a friend than to get all traumatized because he didn't want more.

Then when he thought he might have a chance to move to Florida, he stopped calling and driving around....but mostly it bothered me that it seemed like he didn't even want to talk with me anymore. And he wouldn't look at me across the room with that kinda fond look that he had before.

I tried to ignore it, and figure that he just had a lot on his mind or something, then just before he went to check out florida, I asked him why he stopped calling. He told me that it was no particular reason, just moving on.

Well....I agonized a bit....What did I do? Is he just an a**h*l*? Was he just messing with me all along? Did he decide to keep his distance to avoid some kind of emotional good bye?

Finally I decided that, if our friendship wasn't worth taking the time and effort to tell me what was wrong, then I wasn't losing as much as I thought. Whatever his reason, he is doing what works for him, and I can't change it.

I guess to be honest, I might have done this too, to other people. Where I liked someone well enough, but there was just something that made me not want to put as much effort in as they did. Or they wanted/expected more from our friendship than I thought I could give them.....

Relationships - even friendships - can be tough. There have been times where I just avoided people because it all seemed too complicated. It hurts....but as the years have passed, it gets a little easier. I'm only now realizing that as much as I admire and respect and love someone, and what them to be a big part of my life.....they aren't always going to feel that way about me. But I'm lucky to have a few good friends who for some reason or other do feel that way about me, and I am real lucky to have them in my life.

I'll bet you can say that too.....just look around here!

Really