This is, without a doubt, 'totally' me. I have gone on spending binges so often I could open my own store with all the items that 'I Just Had To Have Right Then And There'..Credit cards..credit cards everywhere..and not a dime, leftover...thereafter to spare...
Nova


http://www.addvance.com/add_friendly/newsletter/april05.html

Overcoming Compulsive Shopping and Spending

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People with ADD often have problems with finances because they continuously spend more than they should. Shopping may be used as a way to deal with depression, anxiety or to create some excitement or stimulation in your life. However, like other addictions, the "high" rarely lasts long and generally makes you feel worse as your finances deteriorate and debt mounts. After shopping, you feel guilty and ashamed that once again you have lost control.

Individuals with ADD are particularly vulnerable to compulsive shopping because their impulsivity makes it hard for them to think through the purchase -- often buying items that they do not need. I remember one man with ADD whose living room was filled with bags of mulch and a table saw and he lived in an apartment!

Do you find that you shop to feel better? Do you go shopping with the intention of buying one or two items and return with bags full of purchases? Do you have bad credit or serious financial problems because of your spending habits? Do you need to take an extra job just to pay the bills that result from your spending?

If you answered "yes" to these questions, try these ADD- Friendly ways to deal with your compulsive shopping or spending:


Make a list and buy only what is on the list.
Don't shop alone. Take along as family member or friend who can help curb your spending.
Try window shopping when the stores are closed or go shopping without your credit cards and wallet until you decide what you want and need.
Use only one credit card and cancel and destroy all others so that you can't run up a balance on each.
Pay with cash and take only a reasonable amount that you can afford with you when you shop.
Take a walk or exercise when the urge to shop hits you.
Don't shop on the internet or use catalogues...only shop in person and only when you need something. Refrain from shopping for pleasure.
If you feel out of control, seek professional help. If you already have poor credit because of past spending patterns, contact a credit counseling center.

Many people with ADD tend to have multiple addictive behaviors. To understand more about ending the destructive cycle of ADD and addictive behaviors, order ADD and ADDiction: When Too Much Isn't Enough (http://www.addvance.com/bookstore/adults.html#addiction) by Wendy Richardson, MA.

Additional tips from Survival Tips for Women with AD/HD by Terry Matlen (http://www.addvance.com/bookstore/books.html#survivaltips), M.S.W. page 140 - 141

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Tip#1: Overspending on credit cards - change your habits.

My credit cards are way over limit so I had to change my habits. First, I now force myself to only use cash. To pay off the cards, I took the one with the highest balance and paid an extra $25-50 per month on it until it was paid off. Then I went to the next highest one and did the same. Only two more left to go! - Karen Kruger Chapel Hill, NC

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Tip #2: Consider joining Debtors Anonymous.

Details at www.debtorsanonymous.org (http://www.debtorsanonymous.org/)

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Tip #3 Spending out of control - freeze your assets!

Woem shop???? Naw never...only for stuff I don't need...now the stuff I need like food/household necessities I won't shop for until I am out of toliet paper, tooth paste, necessary "female protection" cookies and ice cream.

Shoe shopping, clothes (you know in case i grow or shrink), and gadgets for my computer (hey it only took a month for me to attach my CD burner after I stuck it into the computer hole) that un-necessary stuff I could shop for all day...

If my dyslexia can cause me to get my numbers and words transversed why can't it help me get these two shopping priorities "transversed"??????



Make a list and buy only what is on the list.

This would be great if only I could remember the *&^%$ list.....AND/OR remember where I put it!!!!!!!!


Don't shop alone. Take along as family member or friend who can help curb your spending.


You mean people have family members who aren't as impulsive or worse, that will actaully go to the store WITH?????.....impulsive shoppers attract other implusive shoppers while repealing those that aren't.....or is it just that way in my family?????


go shopping without your credit cards and wallet until you decide what you want and need.


THIS suggestion is easy it happens to me frequently...I get to the counter with what I want to find I have no wallet.......check book with no checks.....credit cards what are those?????



Pay with cash and take only a reasonable amount that you can afford with you when you shop.


In other word stay at home because those like me who find this of interest have NO $$$$ After bills are paid....the electric company will still cut it off even if you forget to sign the check, or send one made out to the gas company.....and how would I know that????? :rolleyes:



Don't shop on the internet or use catalogues...only shop in person and only when you need something.


EEEEeeeee e-bay withdraw!!!!!! :eyebrow: :faint:

If it weren't for ADDed impulsiveness e-bay would go broke!!!!!! They specificially designed this site to suck funds directly from impulsive shopper's pockets. If computer crashes and Gary misses a month e-bay reports a decrease in sales that quarter.



Refrain from shopping for pleasure.

Dinner and the grocery store....... :o



To pay off the cards, I took the one with the highest balance and paid an extra $25-50 per month on it until it was paid off.

On a serious note......

Now this would make scense the other way around...if decreasing credit card numbers therefore interest rates "over all" it would make more scense to pay extra on credit card with the lowest amount due.The lower amount would be paid off quicker simply because it is lower. Feeling of accomplishment.......hopefully will encourage continued modified spending behavior.


When the lowest card gets paid off then you could apply the extra "$25.00" and the amount you used to pay the lower card to the next lowest credit card balance...keep "rolling" the payments over by the time you get to the highest you would be paying the combined amount of all previous monthly credit card debts to that single one!!!!!!!!

Hello, My name is Alethia and I am an over spender. I just got us in some serious trouble, by using the utility money to support my habit. I have sinced asked for help, and sadly turned over my finances to my husband. Please dont judge me, I cant help it. A bit of advice, please DO NOT GO TO EBAY!!!! IT IS ADDICTIVE!!!

I can remember a female comedian saying...Nothing is worse than a woman alone on a Saturday night with a bottle of wine and an ebay password!

I never thought my overspending was due to my ADHD. Now that I know this, I will know what to blame the next time I max out my credit cards! :)

Thanks for all these great comments. I am new on this site and also newly diagnosed. This is all so informative!

Lauriellen

Okay, I used to blame bipolar disorder. Now I can blame ADD. Does this mean I get to write off twice a much?

Don't look at me !
Why do you think I posted this article, LOL !

Like I don't have enough CDs, books and clothes...I have to go and buy more ?

Yup !

I have to buy, two holiday presents, if that...so all of the above is for me.
Again.

I haven't even come close to finishing the books I've already bought, and it's not like they're going to go out of print...and neither are the CDs...and the clothes aren't going to do a disappearing act out of the stores, neither...

As a matter of fact- I just found two more stores that I JUST LOVE, at a town cetner close by me- one called Rave and the other called Pacsun..and I'm there, Mamas !!!!

Who cares !!!

it's either that or I turn into a 'smoke-dangling-from-my-mouth-bar-fly-chickie'...and since they banned smoking in public restaurants and bars in mine and surrounding counties....idiots !!

I'm going to pass a NO FARTING and LEWD LEARING ordinance next that these old biddies have no say so on !!!

I'll continue with my impusive shopping habits..

I really hope no one comes on here to preach, either (0;
That'll be falling on deaf credit cards, LMAO !!!

See y'all at the stores
Nova

Nova Sorry to preach but come on now.
A person can never own to many CD's and Books. ;)
I can stop buying them any time I want too. :D

Ugh Books my one real impulse buy.
My friend said to me last week you read so many books.
Well, yeah I keep buying them. So I have to read a lot. LOL

Ugh Books my one real impulse buy.

Okay, so I have trouble reading and I have stacks of stuff that I HAVE to read for work/school. So, why do I keep buying books?

I have at least 60 books that are "waiting" to be read. But I keep buying more! I do most of my pleasure "reading" using audiobooks, so I always buy those first -- I've got about 30 of those "in the hopper", too.

What's wrong with me?

I spent WAY too much for Christmas so far. It's pathetic! But I love giving. :) I am also a book freak. (wonder if that's an ADD trait) If I can't decide among 3 or more books, I just get them all. Then I end up donating them to the library and they still make me pay my overdue fees.

I do hope that after Christmas I am able to slow down the credit cards. They are taking on a life of their own these days. I know I am "medicating myself" with spending, that's what they say anyway. This ADD along with my bipolar II is wearing me out more than the shopping.

L

I spent WAY too much for Christmas so far. It's pathetic! But I love giving. :) I am also a book freak. (wonder if that's an ADD trait) If I can't decide among 3 or more books, I just get them all.
I knew my son needed meds when I saw him sitting on the floor at the bookstore with 3 books in front of him, crying because he couldn't choose. I think that's a good idea for a new thread.


I do hope that after Christmas I am able to slow down the credit cards. They are taking on a life of their own these days. I know I am "medicating myself" with spending, that's what they say anyway. This ADD along with my bipolar II is wearing me out more than the shopping.
Your profile doesn't give your age, but please let me give you a bit of advice. STOP USING CREDIT CARDS!!!

I'm BiP II as well and it only took me a couple of years to build up debt large enough to follow me for 20. I'm 39 now and still have a couple of accounts to pay off. My husband (most certainly ADD, too) made similar mistakes. As a result, we've paid cash for everything the last 10 years and still have LOUSY credit scores!

We manage to live pretty comfortably in spite of it, but we'd pay a whole lot less on our mortgage and such if we'd been smarter about credit early on. Two cards, kept at a very low balance and high available credit are optimal. Use them, but no more than you can pay off the next month.

I agree barbyma to much charging can be a killer to financial stability.

My credit card system works like this.
I have only two credit cards.

One is a major credit card that I don't keep in my wallet.
It's in a dresser draw for emergence use.
The last time I used it was when I had to purchase a plane ticket.
To fly out of state for a family emergence.

The second card is for a Gas Station.
My gas card I do keep in my wallet.
I use that to get gas when I don't have enough cash on me.

If I had a credit card in my wallet.
I would be to tempted to impulse buy twice as much.

My credit card system works like this.
I have only two credit cards.


That's a great system. I'd add one more to use for everyday purchases that gets paid off EVERY MONTH. The reason for this is to increase your credit rating.

I could have a spending problem if I let myself because I, too, get a thrill from making purchases -- and I have a one-year old daughter, TELL me there aren't about a billion adorable outfits and accessories I would LOVE to buy for her!

I am also a book addict.

My husband and I have a lot of debt and I want to continue to stay at home to care for my daughter, so when I have the urge to spend, I just think to myself -- do I really need this, or do I need to stay home with my daughter? That pretty much settles it for me. I just treat myself like a ten year old who needs to keep it down.

Plus my husband takes care of all the finances, and he's pretty good at not spending impulsively, which helps a lot.

So, is their a tip for those ADD'ers who are depressed by their non-ADD spouses overspending habits?

I mean we have SO many NEVER USED exercise gadgets in our house it's pathetic! I didn't buy them....I already know I'm not going to use them.
Then there is the Target shopping spree's and shoes and coats and nail polish and all of the stereo typical female shopaholic stuff that she does that drives me nuts. And the thing is that she was a "Tom Boy" when I met her. Not into having her nails and hair done, very practical about her clothes but still dressed and looked nice.

And here we are....Santa is on his way and my pocket book is feeling like a fish that was just gutted with a dull jagged rusty knife......

Many times I've tried to get her to sit down and look at our finances. Many times I've tried to get her to cut up her credit cards....and every time I've failed.
Don't even talk to me about ebay and the antique glass collection we have. We started that one together and I was done at 50 pieces. We now have more than 250 on display and another 50 in boxes in the garage that will eventually be resold on ebay.

Oh, did I mention that my wife is one of those people that ALWAYS has to be right?

So, what's the tips for dealing with that?

So, is their a tip for those ADD'ers who are depressed by their non-ADD spouses overspending habits?

Practical doesn't exclude impulsive!

First you MUST get her to admit the problem and agree to be put on a leash. Take the spending power away. Give her a budget and an "allowance".

I know it's insulting and it's demeaning and it's controlling, but this is a partnership. If one person can't control themselves, the other needs to take over. There's no shame in it.

I'm a bit of an impulsive shopper, too, but my husband is much worse, so I get the financial reigns.

Of course, if you don't get her to agree, then this won't work.

Good luck!!!

Practical doesn't exclude impulsive!

First you MUST get her to admit the problem and agree to be put on a leash. Take the spending power away. Give her a budget and an "allowance".

I know it's insulting and it's demeaning and it's controlling, but this is a partnership. If one person can't control themselves, the other needs to take over. There's no shame in it.

I'm a bit of an impulsive shopper, too, but my husband is much worse, so I get the financial reigns.

Of course, if you don't get her to agree, then this won't work.

Good luck!!!
That's the thing...I've tried to get her to agree...but she won't. So, I've done things like increasing my 401k contribution to the max so it looks like we don't have enough money. If we have any extra money I payoff big chunks of credit cards that are in my name. (Unfortunately we lived on credit while I was unemployed for a few months.)

That's the thing...I've tried to get her to agree...but she won't. So, I've done things like increasing my 401k contribution to the max so it looks like we don't have enough money. If we have any extra money I payoff big chunks of credit cards that are in my name. (Unfortunately we lived on credit while I was unemployed for a few months.)
Well, those things are smart, but I don't know what else to tell you. She's gotta face it.

Best of luck to you.