Hello!

I am a housewife and mother of a two years old son. My life had been a total professional failure until now. Though I'd like to lern languages on my own to start a training in a few years to become translater.

Anyway it is so difficult for me to find the time and silence to do this. My son is always disturbing me and doing the chores takes so much time.

My mother in law often takes the boy, but I am so ashamed to tell, that the languages are more then an exclusive hobby, because in the past my professional aspirations did always fail. So I don't wan't to tell, why she should take him more often. I don't want to tell my husband about my plans either for the same reason.

First I want to have a certain level of language-skills to be sure enough to make my plans public. So for the time beeing I have to lern with my son around me.

How can I succeed under this circumstances?

Thanks
Xandra

Tell her your working on a special project right now and don't want to tell what it is because you want to surprise your husband and her as well. Then ask her if she is willing to help you out by keeping your son more often.

I'm sorry to hear that you are so hard on yourself. There is nothing for you to be ashamed of. A lot of people go through many different professions before they find the right one for them. The only reason to be ashamed would be if you gave up and quit trying. However, I can understand where you are coming from because I worry about being judged by my own inlaws and husband. It's silly because it's me who is judging myself not them. I tend to project it on to others so I can maintain that self fullfilling prophecy I have.

Good luck in your studies. I hope things work out for you this time.

I agree with casinowife...don't be so hard on yourself. Try and keep the impatience down and accept that, for right now, you can only move forward in small steps. Soon your son will start Kindergarten and then you will have more time for yourself. You could also check your area for a "mini" kindergarten...where they go once or twice for a couple of hours each week. I did that, and it was a great relief!

Hang in there.

Kim

If it were me:

I'd blab my plans to everybody who will listen, BUT, I'd also admit that my confidence to achieve these goals is shaky. Then, I'd ask for their support and assure them that their investment won't be in vain. Give it your all and make sure everyone knows you are giving it your all. If it doesn't work out, you've at least tried.

Good luck


Barb

Fortunately for me, my husband is my biggest fan. He encourages me when I feel like quitting, which is becoming more and more frequent as I cannot seem to find a job. Like many ADDers, I have had a number of jobs, and I dread getting another job that does not work out. My self esteem just cannot take another hit.

Anyway, do you think maybe you are not giving your husband enough credit? I mean, I completely understand not wanting to tell you MIL and other people what your plans are, but if your husband knows and is supportive, he may be able to give you the encouragement you need to move forward. He could also then help with your child while you are pursuing your plan.

Best wishes!