Instead of it being something else or just in your head?

(Gonna be a long first post, warned ye be. I figure I can't really ask for your advice if you don't know most of the facts. Not going to get too personal, though. Hopefully.)

I guess I'll preface by saying I'm 15- which means I'm a teenager first and foremost, so most of what I'm thinking of could just be that whole experimentation stuff. But uh, anyway... Oh, and I haven't actually been analyzed for ADD or anything. My parents don't want me on medication and think that I wouldn't be in honors classes if I had ADD, but then that's them.

I should probably start out with why I think I have ADD, shouldn't I? Gah, where to start. For one thing, my parents said that when I was like 2 or 4 that I was horribly hyperactive, but were reluctant to put me on medication or anything. Still reluctant, actually. Anyway, for one I was always running around; jumping off stairs(small ones, not full flights...) and climbing bookcases. Bookcases. My parents to this day tell me I'm lucky for not breaking the bookcase or something. Heh, they told me how they couldn't take me anywhere; for instance if they took me to a bookstore I'd knock down all the books. I apparently got alot calmer once I was put in school- much to the satisfaction of my parents.

In school, I guess I did well. But it sure as well wasn't cause I was responsible or hard working. Homework is hard for me, I guess. Just with starting it, really. I do nearly everything the night before it's due. Daily homework isn't nearly as much as a problem as weekly homework. Large assignments are killer; I can't get every thing down like I'm supposed to. Hell, for my English class I'm still having trouble keeping everything in MLA(Modern Language Association, I think) format- even with just putting the name, date, and period/teacher in the right order. Tests are easy if I remember to study- I never do, though. Except, like, right before. And if I do infact study right before, I end up getting A's. I actually always do better if I do it right before than over a period of time. Like in History.

We get this test, which my teacher says is an actual college history test from some professor John Mckay. I think the first test we took, I got an 86 on it- three less than the highest score in all three of the Freshman classes. The second test, I studied before- well, I finished half of the notes I should've taken throughout the two weeks, put them in a study guide he gave us, and just studied off that for around a combined total of an hour( a bit after I completed the study guide, and intermittenly at school. Thankfully I had a free period in my English class). I got an 89 on that, which was one of the two highest scores within all three periods. He says it's the "highest any student got for the past five years," but I asked a sophmore friend of my who took the class last year and said she scored higher, so my teacher is probably just feeing us crap to make us feel better. He's still a good teacher though- really likes what he does.

But anyway, that's about it for academics, I think. Except in Math- for that, I always have problems on my first pass. Not so much that I don't know the material, but that I don't what the Hell I just did. Seriously. Today we took a math test- I'm in a Algebra I Honors class(all my classes except PE and Spanish are honors actually, not to boast or anything) that I took last year in Middle School. Took the course I mean- not the test. But anyway, with the test I knew most of the stuff and answered everything within the first pass. But the last test I took I got a C on it- I noticed alot of it were due to stupid mistakes. Noticed the same thing when I reread my answers, which I rarely do. I mean, I'd look at the steps and what I thought I was doing was correct- but I was putting in different numbers. Like moving numbers to different sides in a equation. I'd add a number instead of subtract a problem to the other side, even though within my head I thought that's what I did. Then I found another problem, where somehow I transformed an expression into an equation. Don't ask. I dunno how I did overall, but I figure it's going to improve a bit from last time.

Yeah, that's about it for academics- although I'm probably going to mention it again. I guess I'll mention about my social life and all- again, not going to be too personal. This is actually the main reason why I want to get checked out about ADD, 'course. First off, I suck at talking. Really, I do. I speak entirely too fast- words mush together, or I end up saying something entirely innappropiate in the context or it's unintelligible. This has led to me being quiet, I guess. People say I'm quiet, but I don't talk because I can't get my point across. What's horrible that I know that I don't talk because I can't get my point across with clarity, and that I can't actually tell anybody that because I can't get my point across. Hehe. I like writing for that reason- the undo button/eraser is my best friend.

Anyway, I also get confused easily within a conversation. Someone would say something, and I would interpret it another way. My cousins use to ridicule me for that when I was younger, hence why I think I'm quiet- I learned shutting up was easier than trying to defend in futility. Also, I would phrase things in such as way so that they're not all that direct. Make obscure references and such. I do get a kick if someone does actually recongize it, but usually all I get is a browed expression. Especially with jokes, I could never reproduce them where they're funny. Wrong emphases and left out key words would give out a flat punchline.

What else...well, I guess I could talk about disorganization. That's a biggie among people with ADD, isn't it? Yeah. I'm disorganized. My room is a mess, of course. I'm typing this with a floor that's not made of any carpet frabic, but rather a montage of clothing.(I spent around 30 seconds trying to remember how to spell "montage," I was thinking of menage, which was going to give an entirely different connotation and imagery...)

My backpack is also a mess. The pocket where I keep my pencils and stuff is just a general area, I usually just poke my hand in and pull out whatever I feel. The small pocket above that is a month's worth of crumpled up personal jokes to a friend I sit next to in Spanish. I've been meaning to clean it out, but I never remember too. My two larger pockets behind that are where I keep books and binders. What I put in either pocket is largely up to the whim of my subconcious. Even papers I've been doing badly with- while I keep my binder color-coded to each subject I have, I either put papers pushed up in a given folder(sometimes in the wrong one...) or just outside my binder roaming in my backpack. Yeah. At least I'm better about this than I was last year...there was food in there. Bagel, if I remember. I put it in there during the school year and when I cleaned out my backpack at the end of the year, I found out it dissolved into a neat layer of carbohydrates filling up the bottom crack. Smooth, I say to myself.

That's more or less what I have to say, I think. I do feel bad giving you guys this, though. I mean, giving a nine paragraph essay to people who are gathered specifically because they can't pay attention. I'm sorry, really. I'd just really like it if you guys could tell me that what I'm talking about is actually ADHD symptoms, or just something in my head- trying to cover up me being naturally lazy or disorganized or something.

Thanks!

(Oh, can't believe I forgot to mention this. I have to keep a body part moving nearly all times during class. Used to be my right leg, but ever since I entered High School seems to be progessed towards more limbs. Like, both legs...and sometimes in my arms. I'm into music, learning guitar and listening music for hours every day(even though I switch between songs halfway in usually...) and while I try to keep a rhythm to everything, when I fidget with my right leg it's always so fast and to a beat that I can't really discern. Odd, really. Oh, another thing. When I'm playing my guitar, I'm having a hard time remembering where to go. As in, I memorize a riff or something. I play maybe two measures worth, and then I lose my rhythm and beat when I forgot what I was supposed to play. Frustrating, really. I dread doing cover songs for that reason, as I really don't want to spend alot of time fussing over getting everything in the correct order. Rather do my own thing and improvise or make my own song out of scales.)

I read it! I read it! I read the whole thing! *jumps up and down in excitement* :D

I've had SO much caffeine today, I'm actually able to read really well tonight, and I'm not wildly pacing so much. I heart Red Bull.

Okay. HOLY GOD, you sound like me at 15. Or 16, or 17, or heck... I'm 21 now, so some thing don't apply, but I could nearly have written this post. Especially about tests, and backpack (dis)organization and talking. It all sounds pretty ADD to me.

I was never in honors classes, although I was SUPPOSED to be in GATE. Never got in, thanks to a whole bunch of red tape. (Missing application periods because my family was moving cities, falling outside the quota of students the government paid to have tested, that sort of thing.) Was recommended for it, never got in. My grades in school were generally quite high, though.

Do I think you have ADHD? I dunno, do you? You seem to think you do, and if you have a concern, it should be addressed. It's your life, after all.

Personally, I found it hard not to sway like a tree in a hurricane in response to what any random stranger said about the possibility of my having ADD ("They said I get distracted easily! I might have it!....They said only people with X problem have it, and I don't, I must just be a lazy loser!"). It feels like there must be a stigma about going to get assessed for it, like you're looking for excuses. But you know you're not, right? Even if you don't get the diagnosis, so what - you know you're doing it because you're concerned about your current and future success, and that's a damn good reason.

If you're really concerned, don't let the grade issue get in the way of investigating it. Keep in mind, though, that you need to be able to demonstrate impairment when you get assessed. Think about how you think your symptoms impair you, and why you're bothered by them enough that you believe you need help. Write it down, so you don't forget it. (Classic ADHD thing, I think - not remembering your own damn symptoms.)

Good luck, and check in with the board if you need more advice. People here are awesome and always willing to help.

Personally, I found it hard not to sway like a tree in a hurricane in response to what any random stranger said about the possibility of my having ADD ("They said I get distracted easily! I might have it!....They said only people with X problem have it, and I don't, I must just be a lazy loser!"). It feels like there must be a stigma about going to get assessed for it, like you're looking for excuses. But you know you're not, right? Even if you don't get the diagnosis, so what - you know you're doing it because you're concerned about your current and future success, and that's a damn good reason. Yeah, that's the big thing. I don't really care if the psychiatrist say it's not ADD; I'd rather that I know what it is as opposed to me guessing at it. Which is what I'm doing now...at the very least, to me it seems like ADD is what I have, reading all the symptoms and stuff.

If you're really concerned, don't let the grade issue get in the way of investigating it. Keep in mind, though, that you need to be able to demonstrate impairment when you get assessed. Think about how you think your symptoms impair you, and why you're bothered by them enough that you believe you need help. Write it down, so you don't forget it. (Classic ADHD thing, I think - not remembering your own damn symptoms.) Yeah, definitely had that happen. Not in an actual assessment, but when my mom asked me why I thought I had ADD, I said something to the effect of "you might had it, cause you forgot this..." Even though I know it's alot more than that, I forgot it when push came to shove.

I'm 16 have ADD, diagnosed about 5th grade. On/off meds. Started this year, junior, no meds. I'm in 3 AP (college credited) courses, and honors. My GPA is about 3.33, and my ACT is about a 31. I managed to get through grade school without problems pretty much because my intelligence masked my ADD. Come middle school everything fell apart because of orginization and having to remember more. To make a long story short, im smart but have ADD, which has held me back from being "what I could". ADD to me is mainly overfuntion of my thoughts. I tend to think about a million things at the same time, constantly listen to music in my head over this, and try to focus on school work all at once. I was only very hyperactive as a young child, but grew out of that sort of because I would try to think before I acted. I would be VERY hyperactive on the inside but minimal on the outside except for my constant need to tap things and shake my legs. What was important about the medication for me was not to hide my thoughts but to help center my focus. This start of the year I tried no meds, big mistake. In each class I would forget to do homework, put it off, and not study at all. I some how got out of the quarter with only one C, mainly because my teachers are nice about letting me hand in homework, labs, etc many weeks late. Although I did not study or pay any attention in class, i somehow managed to ace the tests. In your brief article I see myself a little bit. I think if it causes enough trouble for you to be either concerned or struggling to get it checked out. And try to find a psychiatrist who is not a narrowed minded numb skull who concludes that because you look calm and collective that you are not scattered.

Peace,
Critter

Now that there is an entire subforum dedicated to diagnosis, I might as well bump this thread to show I'm still unsure about the whole ADD thing.

Welcome to the Forum.

I was diagnosed in 1972 with a 4 hr neuropsych eval.

Today, an ADHD eval. would be done differently.

Welcome to the forums. This is a great place to come for ADHD information and support.

To start things out, only a medical professional can diagnose ADHD. A general doctor, psychologist or psychiatrist can help. Unfortunately, it sounds like your parents are not to open about the idea of ADHD. Someone with ADHD does not have to take medication. There are many other methods to treat ADHD symptoms.

But based on your post, I would say a lot of your symptoms are similar to the symptoms of ADHD.

- hyperactivity
- disorganization
- hard time starting projects or tasks
- hard time completing tasks
- feeling lazy or stupid, when it's really not the case
- careless mistakes
- difficult time following conversations
- interpreting what is being said during a conversation

When you were in 1st - 3rd grade did you constantly get out of your seat and walk around the class or disrupt other classmates?

I play guitar too. I noticed that I find it difficult to slow down. I want to try and play scales as fast as I can. I just end up making mistakes. I also lose track really easy too. I never learned how to read music in band. I had a hard time transposing the notes to my fingers. Oh, I forgot to mention I am 34 years old and was just diagnosed a year ago.

If it's easy to talk to your parents, then just explain to them how you feel. Ask them to go to the doctor and seek a referal to a psychologist or psychiatrist. They will be able to test you. Your parent may say something like "all you need to do is try harder and apply yourself". This is a common comment to someone with ADHD.

This is one thing that I use to explain ADHD, my mind is constantly going from thought to thought. Most of it is unrelate, but one thought will trigger another thought, which triggers another thought. All within a split second.

Good luck and keep us posted.

Welcome to the forums. This is a great place to come for ADHD information and support.

To start things out, only a medical professional can diagnose ADHD. A general doctor, psychologist or psychiatrist can help. Unfortunately, it sounds like your parents are not to open about the idea of ADHD. Someone with ADHD does not have to take medication. There are many other methods to treat ADHD symptoms. I dunno, really. When I bring it up, they just say that I couldn't be where I am in school if I really had it..or that I haven't seen how people with add really act...

But based on your post, I would say a lot of your symptoms are similar to the symptoms of ADHD.

- hyperactivity
- disorganization
- hard time starting projects or tasks
- hard time completing tasks
- feeling lazy or stupid, when it's really not the case
- careless mistakes
- difficult time following conversations
- interpreting what is being said during a conversation
Yeah, each one of those fits me...

When you were in 1st - 3rd grade did you constantly get out of your seat and walk around the class or disrupt other classmates? I can't really remember a whole lot about my childhood. I do know that before I was in school, I was a horrible monster whom my parents couldn't take anyway(for instance, I once knocked down all the books in a bookstore and my brother had to trail behind to pick them up...) but I calmed down once in school.

I play guitar too. I noticed that I find it difficult to slow down. I want to try and play scales as fast as I can. I just end up making mistakes. I also lose track really easy too. I never learned how to read music in band. I had a hard time transposing the notes to my fingers. Oh, I forgot to mention I am 34 years old and was just diagnosed a year ago. Yeah. Scales I'm alright at, since it's more muscle memory than me actually having to think. But songs are tougher, since everything has to be in order..I lose track a few measures in.

If it's easy to talk to your parents, then just explain to them how you feel. Ask them to go to the doctor and seek a referal to a psychologist or psychiatrist. They will be able to test you. Your parent may say something like "all you need to do is try harder and apply yourself". This is a common comment to someone with ADHD. My dad says my worst trait is that I'm a slacker.

This is one thing that I use to explain ADHD, my mind is constantly going from thought to thought. Most of it is unrelate, but one thought will trigger another thought, which triggers another thought. All within a split second.

Good luck and keep us posted. Well, my friends say that the best word that fits me is "random."