I have worked as a production tech in a small media firm earning a paltry 8.5 dollars an hour. I joined in May 2004. I have seen many people come and go and all but one person have been promoted, most of them after 3 months of their joining.

the bosses kept me because they thought I was hard working, sincere, etc. But I went through a lot of lows. I was told to take meds for ADHD. The doc even asked me to quit this (graveyard), but I am a poor student. I would not be able to eat or pay rent if I do not hang onto this job.

Today I noticed that two young girls who joined like 3 months ago, were promoted - almost too easily and effortlessly. I was so tensed and shaken that I did not know what to do. Offcourse I have gone through countless panic attacks and suicide thoughts over the last few years. Somebody commented (a kindly friend of mine who has epilepsy, "your brains seems to find it hard to cope//""

My work record there is one of mixed success and failure. I do really good on days and really bad on some days.

I think of Strattera, or whatever add drugs that are supposed to help. And here I am unable to afford them and being unable to make a difference in my life.

One of my supervisors told me. "a man is what he is, because of his own choosing and thinking""..

My brain wants to get out of this, but my brain is its own enemy and this goes on..

sometimes I think of suicide. I have my lexapro to keep me from getting obsessed, but today is another bad day when I think of hopelessness and despair

http://www.lilly.com/products/access/direct_patient.html#LillyCares

Please check out this Eli Lilly website. Maybe you can get Strattera for free. I think your doctor will have to contact them.

I feel your pain and hopelessness. The right medication can work wonders so please don't give up yet.

I had a few similar real bad days. August 25th and 26th, but then Hurricane Katrina hit and then I couldn't feel sorry for myself anymore.

Keep us informed. We care.

Hi
I visited the site you mentioned. It appears to me so far that the program that Ely Lilly has is meant for Senior US citizens. I am an international student and possibly not eligible..
But I will look again.

Thanks for your support and compassion

ilango

hmmm, i don't really knwo what the laws are in CA, but you might want to check out if they have a free care system--just call the nearest hospital and ask--try a university hospital as well.....when I graduated from college in Boston, and was out of a job, MA law allows those who don't earn that much to free care--literally, the best health care available. And while I was on that plan, I could see any specialist, any procedure, whatever--so check out if they have something simmilar in CA.... you may not have Kennedy out there pulling for you, but you never know..good luck

I have worked as a production tech in a small media firm earning a paltry 8.5 dollars an hour. I joined in May 2004. I have seen many people come and go and all but one person have been promoted, most of them after 3 months of their joining. are you considered a minority?

hey ilangocal,

I'm an international student too in Georgia though, andI can suggest to you to go to a community health center and they will hook u up with meds mostly for free, although I do suggest you try concerta out if strattera causes u things like to go sleepy and stuff. Also, the psychologist who diagnosed me suggested stimulant medication for me for a few days for a confirmed ADD diagnosis.

Let me know if I can help you in any way...feel free to PM me..

Thanks a lot.
I will look for this community health center. I believe this adhd is causing me small problems with my roomies. I forget to do small things and I am constantly and sternly reminded by my roomies. My roomie is not talking to me properly even today..

I will PM you.

Hiya ilangocal,

I do that alllll the time too! I always intend to do the small things, then forget about them. This annoys friends and co-workers.

People who don't understand ADD may assume that you're lazy, or inconsiderate, or self-centered. This is not the case, so don't you believe it either! I know from your post that you already realize this, but keep reminding yourself not to put yourself down, ok?

You will find a way to get the medicine you need, and this problem will go away.

Just wanted to check back and make sure you were still with us.

I understand about the roommate thing (why is everyone so darn fussy about things that don't really matter?).

Getting married is more of the same --- I TRIED to warn him! It's not my fault that he didn't listen ;)

Have a great day! Oh yeah. Strattera didn't make me sleepy, as a matter of fact, I lay awake a few hours every night. At first I couldn't eat or go to the bathroom, but that went away. (I lost about 12 pounds).

Hi everybody
I am so grateful to each person who took the pains to write.
I do realize that despite all the problems that adhd can create, I am a good person in ways, 'normal' people cannot think of.

I was thinking of finding another apartment and moving on. These people are irked that I eat raw vegetables, fatless milk, etc. It is as though such things make me unacceptable to them. People have called me slow, confused, moronic, etc..etc..But I moved on.

Well, I have to try and get hold of Strattera. I am planning to tell one of my friends to get me 2 months stock of strattera from India when he goes there.

thanks everybody

You might want to think about ordering two different dosages from India. I started Strattera with two 18 mg per day (I think I was supposed to start with two 20 mg per day=--but the doctor didn't have those samples). After the first month, progressed to two 40 mg per day. Things are much better now, especially since I've learned what the word "compliance" means, lol, usually I forget to take them on time and then I get a headache and I'm "stupid" the whole next day.

At first, I took two at a time and found that wasn't good. I laid on the floor and the room spun just like I was really drunk.

I admire your healthy food choices. Good luck.

So shall I tell him to get 20mg and 40mg doses respectively? Thanks a lot for sharing your experience.

my heart goes out to you ,What kind of work atmosphere do you work in ? I have noticed in my past that when working for people whom expect you to fail -I would ,no doubt, not let them down .

My work history
-restaurant-going nowhere
-painter -monotonous-going nowhere
-Navy -too strict and regimented but received training
-IBEW -Dangerous ,deadly,complex ,-read challenging ,risky ,sometimes thrilling and fun+ always changing coworkers -For me- ADD =good fit

hi william
thanks so much. I work in a place that proclaims itself as a company that 'drives advertizing opportunities online". I work as a production technician "cutting" ads. This is basically not a complicated process, whose end result is to have a set of ads processed.

But very dense ads can screw up the production rate and there are several other variables that can affect both speed and efficiency. My condition prevented me from making the required 12 ads per hour after the end of my 3 month period. But they evaluated me and kept me saying, " I am very hard-working, focussed, honest, etc. They even said I have good communication skills"

After nearly a year I started producing about 10-11 ads per hour and now I make about 11-12 but it is not consistent.

This is what irks them, making them want not to promote me, because I am percieved to have some problem that makes me forget, make mistakes and unsuited to getting promoted.

Well, I am trained to be a computer science professional. This is just a temp job for me and not a career.

I program computers well, and I have what it takes to succeed. C++ is my fav language.

I have a hard time satisfying people who always seem to be evaluating me. My dress, my way of talking over the phone, my attitude, all seem to under the microscope.

People say, " you are unfit. You cannnot survive. Go back to something you can do."

I do not accept that.

may I ask why you are not working in your chosen field ?

There is no shame in a bad fit for a job -you are probably 20 times better at that particular job than I could ever be

It sounds repetitive and painstaking meticulousness ,if you are anything like me ,my mind would tend to wander after I go on auto pilot and then -careless mistake

There are factory assembly line workers and then there are race car drivers -the point is those two are not interchangable ,don't try and force a square peg in a round hole

" "a man is what he is, because of his own choosing and thinking"".. at first this smacked as an insult ,but really there is wisdom in there if you can read it as "find what you love to do that earns a good living "= being happy and a success

This is really a very temporary job, which I took up as a part time job while in school. I know that this is not at all going to be my career in any way.
I chose to do it in the first place, just because I needed some money to fill my pocket, while I was in school.

You are right. My mind is meant to wander and I think it can be very suited for a job like programming, where I need to be able to think in all directions.

I am on the way to getting the job I want, and I will go for it.

I think it would be wise to try and obtain 60 each of 20 mg/40 mg Strattera.

I have no suggestions med-wise. I can tell you the reason you are not being promoted is because you are not producing enough - regardless of the fact that it's due to a medical condition.

I would recommend first taking care of the add problems. Do what you can to get on strattera or whatnot. I make decent money and have good healthcare, and strattera was still too $$$ for me.. ~$50 for a bottle of 60 40mg's (twice a day). I ended up switching to extended release ritalin even though strattera seemed to work pretty well.. this is just based on cost.

It's funny -- I always did worst at the "easy" jobs. I was a bus boy once, and was always getting ragged out. I just couldn't keep all the things to do straight. There'd be three tables needing clearing, and the owner would find me polishing silverware or something... I'd be like, this is such an easy job, why does it make me feel like such a dimwit?

Now I do much more challenging things, but they are so much easier for me. If I were you, I'd start looking for a part time job involving C++ programming or something else you find challenging and interesting.

Hi
I recently got a part time job in C++ recently. I will be paid 8 dollars per hour

that is the silver lining for me

yes, that is the reason. I am not productive. I know this issue is alive and burning. I have been told this often.

the funny thing is: I produce higher than they expect on some days and lower on other days and just what they expect on other days. So I am not at all consistent, which is part of my problem of not being productive.

are you considered a minority?
No, I am not a minority. I am an international alien here.

Hi alien:

Just wanted to check in and see how you were doing. Congratulations on the new job. I start a new job on Monday too. It's very detail oriented and accuracy is very important so God help me. Hope things work out for you.

Congrats and good luck to both of you, ilangocal and nuffsed!

Yay!! Congrats to both of you...nuffsed, my heart goes out to you--but I'm sure you'll be great at your new job!

Yay!! Congrats to both of you...nuffsed, my heart goes out to you--but I'm sure you'll be great at your new job!
thanks. Let us see how it goes. I have not touched C++ for over 4 years now and so I am scared.

hey ilangocal? how did it turn out? how are you faring?

hey ilangocal? how did it turn out? how are you faring?
I am not sure. The heat is still not on me yet. And I have not a clue yet as to how to do this project.

But I am on a Visa and so I have additional pressure on me.

Yay!! Congrats to both of you...nuffsed, my heart goes out to you--but I'm sure you'll be great at your new job!

thanks, guys. If I do well for the next month or so I might be better off. I have to get the Strattera soon too