I'm wondering:

Since depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, negative self-talk and the like are common issues for ADHD folks, has anyone tried writing and/or saying positive affirmations to help break negative thinking or boost self-esteem, change your mood, or etc.?

I know it sounds corny, especially if you conjure up images of "Stuart Smalley" from the old Saturday Night Live skits like I do. But there is some evidence that it can help, because how you feel can affect the release of different chemicals in the body, and that can affect mood, etc.

Think of it... it's a gray dreary day outside, if you're walking around all grumbly and down and only saying negative things to yourself you're bound to feel bad. Versus a bright sunny, mild day and you're feeling good and thinking about positive things, you're laughing, you're bound to feel good.

I'm thinking about trying this, if I can get over the Stuart Smalley image that keeps making me think I'd be being saccharine and hokey. I'd bought a book a while back called, "Change Almost Anything in 21 Days," by Ruth Fishel about using affirmations. I'd remembered a tidbit from an undergrad course that a prof had said typically it takes 21 days to make a habit and 21 days to break a habit. Since I was trying to make some life/habit changes I picked up the book. I read through it, but 1) didn't make time to do it and 2) felt a little silly and so didn't put an effort into doing it.

I know I can't change my brain and the way it's wired, but if I'm willing to try meds to help affect neurotransmitters (which may help me make changes in my life), why not do something non-medicinal like affirmations, positive self-talk, exercise, etc. that could affect endorphins and serotonin in my brain which might affect mood, stress, etc. and make it easier to work on those other changes? I can change the way I talk to myself, my attitude, the messages I give weight to, etc.

So, has anyone else tried affirmations or something similar and found it to help with their attitude, stress, anxiety levels, the messages you send yourself, or etc?

For me, the key would be making the TIME to work this into each day and sticking with it for the 21 days. Heh! Maybe that could be a first one, "I make time for affirmations." :)

Peace, ~~bythesea

I don't think it's silly at all.

About 15 years ago, when I started on a 3-year roller coaster of misdiagnosis, I came to the realization that I needed to work on self-esteem. So, I started to do 2 things:

1) Every time I felt guilty for not doing the dishes or for having fun instead of work, I TOLD myself it's Okay. I TOLD myself that I'm allowed. That I need to take care of ME.

2) I repeatedly reminded myself of the good qualities I possessed. I learned to take compliments, and I learned to give them to myself.

Eventually, as you might be able to tell from my posts :o, I believed these things.

I don't think it's silly at all.
Okay, good! Nice to get another opinion. :)

1) Every time I felt guilty for not doing the dishes or for having fun instead of work, I TOLD myself it's Okay. I TOLD myself that I'm allowed. That I need to take care of ME.

Good advice for the post I just created about seeking balance. Of course, in the mix of work/school vs. Taking care of me, the third option of housework gets avoided. I'm good at rationalizing that I can't do the dishes because I either 1) need to take care of me or 2) I need to work on an assignment. So I do feel guilty, because I feel I need to figure out how to do all 3. I still need to work on some of the guilt thing too. That little nagging voice sitting on your shoulder while taking "me" time that reminds you about the dishes or the paper you have to write.

Good to know that trying to shift your thinking or affirm what you were doing helped with that.

2) I repeatedly reminded myself of the good qualities I possessed. I learned to take compliments, and I learned to give them to myself.
I've been working on this recently. That's why I was thinking positive affirmations might be helpful.

Eventually, as you might be able to tell from my posts :o, I believed these things.
I CAN tell, that's great! Thanks for being a good role model and sharing your experience. :)

~~bythesea

I don't know.

I've tried telling myself that the most important thing is to take care of myself. That is true, but ever since I've told myself that and told myself that its okay not to do the dishes or whatever--they don't get done.

This really isn't okay. I don't feel guilty about it, but it is no way to live and I will feel guilty if child services comes and takes my kids away for living in a filthy house.

And I will feel guilty if, when they grow up, they don't wash their dishes either and, because of me and the lack of things I instilled in them, their husband is mean to them.

Nuffsed. Good point.

I was hoping to figure out a way to balance both the me time and the housework (but then I'm guessing a lot of us are).

It sounded to me like Barbyma hadn't completely ignored housework but had decided to not make it all important, recognizing and valuing other areas that needed her time too.

Anyway, we've gotten a little off-track.

My original question here was about using positive affirmations.

So who knows, maybe affirmations around things like: habits, procrastination, time, housework, parenting, "shoulds", etc. could be helpful if one is trying to balance these things?

I don't know.

I've tried telling myself that the most important thing is to take care of myself. That is true, but ever since I've told myself that and told myself that its okay not to do the dishes or whatever--they don't get done.

Oh, I agree, you've got to have the discipline or it becomes a trade-off. Self esteem for a pig stye? I don't have a solution for that. But, if you can somehow trade the guilt for self-regulation, it works.

Of course, this isn't an easy task for ADDers. Self-regulation is an executive function......

I think positive affirmations are great .

what I try to do when I know something has to be done is try to jump up and do it ,after I wrestle with it in my mind
I learned a long time ago when I used to line up side jobs for after my day job ,during the day I would be loathing the Idea of going ,thinking up reasons not to go ,even though I was the one who scheduled it ,I would go and once I was there ,I was fine ,I was productive

It was the thought :rolleyes: a pessimistic brain in an optimists head

server is slow ,and I'm impatient sorry double post

Years ago when I was in counseling before my ADHD diagnosis. I had a pretty terrific therapist who gave me a couple of very valuable affirmations that really seemed to help.

The first was simple this:

I exist
I have a right to exist
I have value because I exist

The second was kind of a fill in the blank question.

If I knew I was lovable, what would be different right now?

You can substitute okay, enough, or whatever fits best. Once you answer the question act as if it were true even if you don't believe it.

Practiced regularly I found they did help to counter my negative self messages and turn my mind in a different direction. My current therapist encourages me to say affirmations in the mirror. It seems to help too, although I'm not as consistent with it as I could be.

Peace,
Scattered