My son has what seems to be all of the "symptoms" of Ad/Hd listed on YahooHealth. However, he snaps at me for thinking that he has a problem, and thinks that I classify him as a retarded child because of ADHD. I only want to help but whenever I try to he snaps at me that he wants nothing to do with the ADD treatments. Any ideas of what I should do? Any help would be appreciated...

T Edgar

another note: I am not interested in medication for him.

How old is your son?

When my mom first told me that she thought I had it, I had a similar reaction. I did end up seeing a psychologist who diagnosed me, but still didn't believe it. I refused meds at that time because I did not feel I neede them.

It took 4 years for me to realize she was right and go to a Dr. again. It was when I went out with some people from work and did not feel that I was well liked. I looked for information about social skills and came across the symptoms of ADHD. Hit me like a ton of bricks! I now take meds and feel I do a lot better, and I feel better knowing that my struggles have a reason called ADHD.

It is really hard to tell you advice without knowing how old he is, it sounds like he is a minor because you said you are not interested in meds for him. Time and understanding may be the best approach.

Thank you for your quick reply. He is 13 years old, and I'm not interested in meds for him because he is a minor. He has been to a counselor before and we saw a little improvement from that.

T Edgar

That is a tough age. He is still too young to really understand what is best for him. At this age, since you are the parent, I would try talking to a Dr. and see what the Dr. says and telling your son that you are doing this to help him. Ultimately it is within him to accept it if he is diagnosed as ADHD, but since he is so young, it is within your right and responsibilty to look into it as a possiblity. I know that at 13, he will be able to put up a good fight and make it difficult if he wants to, but I think that as a parent you have to think about what you feel is best for him in the long run and do that.

I hope this helps!

Thank you again. I , of course, want to help him, but my husband and I are opposed to the meds.My husband worked for the FDA and consequently we both would really like to help our son without the meds. But our son is convinced that it he is ADD that it means that he is "retarded". He says that is how the other kids at school are categorized when they are diagnosed.

Again, thanks for your replies.
T. Edgar

I understand and respect your opinion on medication, there are many people who feel the same way. I was merely trying to tell you a bit about myself because I feel that the process with accepting ADHD was similar to what you are talking about with your son. There are threads on the board about alternative treatments also behavioral therapies have been discussed as well.

Does he do okay in school? He would never have to tell his peers, but if he is worried about things coming out with the teachers, do you feel that his teachers would need to know about it? You may have already said something about privacy to him, but if the knowledge can be kept to people he trusts, that may help alleviate his fears.

I wish I could give you more advice about how to help him with his fears, but I think that just takes time and their is only so much you can do to change someone's thoughts.

My son has what seems to be all of the "symptoms" of Ad/Hd listed on YahooHealth. However, he snaps at me for thinking that he has a problem, and thinks that I classify him as a retarded child because of ADHD. I only want to help but whenever I try to he snaps at me that he wants nothing to do with the ADD treatments. Any ideas of what I should do? Any help would be appreciated...

T EdgarYou might buy Edward Hallowell and John Ratey's (both Harvard Professors /MD's who have ADD themselves, so that in itself is a pretty good arguement against ADD making you dumb!) book called Answers to Distraction -- it is a short question and answer format and has one section for kids and one section for teens, as well as information for adults. They do a good job of explaining how ADD is like needing glasses. Glasses help you focus, but they don't make you smarter. But being able to focus may help you show how smart you are. Meds do the same thing for ADD -- help you focus, not make you smarter.

Good luck!
Scattered