I have a little cuz whom is 4 and will be 5 in oct. he is hyper. he never gets spanked or taught right grom wrong, his parents just dont give a damn i think someone needs to spank them. But that is totally another subject. Anyway my ques. is this is he ADD or just BAD? I asked if I could carry him to the dr to be evaluated (becuz they are to lazy to) but his dad said no he dont need meds he is just so hyper becuz he drank a yohoo but he acts like this all the time he is always out of one thing in into another. the meds could not hurt he weighs 70 lbs and i try to spank him but i only weigh 105 lbs. so by the time i get him held down i am to tired to spank!
What should I do?

Actually, my counselor tells me that spanking isn't all the effective for ADDers. Meds are sometimes given to little guys, but I was reading that Dexedrine (I think was the one) says on the label can be given under six, but the others generally recommend age six as a starting point. Barkley's book Taking Charge of ADHD might have useful information or one of his books on dealing with defiant behavior, but without the parents on board, things are definately challenging. Is this a student you're dealing with?

Scattered

No he is not in school yet, I have tried ti tell them to place in preschool maybe this will also help but they wony listen.

I have a little cuz whom is 4 and will be 5 in oct. he is hyper. he never gets spanked or taught right grom wrong, his parents just dont give a damn i think someone needs to spank them. But that is totally another subject. Anyway my ques. is this is he ADD or just BAD? I asked if I could carry him to the dr to be evaluated (becuz they are to lazy to) but his dad said no he dont need meds he is just so hyper becuz he drank a yohoo but he acts like this all the time he is always out of one thing in into another. the meds could not hurt he weighs 70 lbs and i try to spank him but i only weigh 105 lbs. so by the time i get him held down i am to tired to spank!
What should I do?
I think a bit of both probably fits here. I agree that if he is ADD spanking wont help. It gets their attention for the moment. They need long term punishment and reward. If his parents are too lazy to help him with either problem he is only gonna get worse. Good Luck!

If there is lack of structure there one or both of the parents could also have AD/HD. No matter what the issue is the sad truth is that unless the parents change (or the child gets removed from the home) there is very little hope for the child.

I am also concerned that you as an adult would even consider "spanking" somebody else's child. You could really get yourself into some legal trouble if you hit this child.

He might have adhd. he might have a numbner of disorders in addition to adhd. Spanking is pointless. His inability to control his impulses will keep him in constant trouble no matter what.

Shouting won't help. It will just add to his sensory load and he might just be even more hyper after hearing someone screaming something he did not quite understand for 30 minutes...

You might read up on ADHD and conduct disorders in children.

My daugher has a son who has adhd. He is getting into his teen years and is bigger thjan her. and he can be pretty defiant. Her tactic is to tackle him physiically to get his attention. It works famously. (she is bipolar as well and he knows not to trigger her or he is really gonna be in it in a big way)

My son was VERY hyper at the age of 5. Spanking did not work on him. However, I would make him do timeouts in the corner or on the couch for 5-10 minutes when he misbehaved. He would sometimes be defiant and get off the couch, so I'd physically pick him up and calmly place him back on the couch. He got the point and it worked to some extent.

If he has a severe enough case of ADHD or bipolar, timeouts probably won't work either and might only serve to make both you and him very miserable.

Believe me, an ADDer with hyperactiity would much rather take a beating than be made to sit on the couch with nothing to do for 10 minutes.


Me :D





I have a little cuz whom is 4 and will be 5 in oct. he is hyper. he never gets spanked or taught right grom wrong, his parents just dont give a damn i think someone needs to spank them. But that is totally another subject. Anyway my ques. is this is he ADD or just BAD? I asked if I could carry him to the dr to be evaluated (becuz they are to lazy to) but his dad said no he dont need meds he is just so hyper becuz he drank a yohoo but he acts like this all the time he is always out of one thing in into another. the meds could not hurt he weighs 70 lbs and i try to spank him but i only weigh 105 lbs. so by the time i get him held down i am to tired to spank!
What should I do?

I do not like spanking other peoples kids but I just want him to be someone when he grows up not someone in prison, I agree that no one would spank my child either, but his parents know and I do it in front of them they just dont care! They are not ADD they are just poor excuses for parents. And I now know that spanking or nothng else I do will help him as long as he goes back home so I have quit, because it just wears me out!!

This post reminds me of a story my Dad told me about me when I was 4 ,I was sitting at the dinner table and had eaten my dinner except for the peas, and was whining about not wanting them, he looked me sternly in the eyes and said William Tell, "you eat those peas right now or I will spank you" and I replied "go ahead and spank me because I am not going to eat those peas"

He said that was the day he realized I was different then regular kids and spanking was not the way to go - He was totally right, he taught me with the patience of a saint and later learned to obey him -okay I never really obeyed - but I stayed out of most trouble because I didn't want to disappoint him

This post reminds me of a story my Dad told me about me when I was 4 ,I was sitting at the dinner table and had eaten my dinner except for the peas, and was whining about not wanting them, he looked me sternly in the eyes and said William Tell, "you eat those peas right now or I will spank you" and I replied "go ahead and spank me because I am not going to eat those peas"

He said that was the day he realized I was different then regular kids and spanking was not the way to go - He was totally right, he taught me with the patience of a saint and later learned to obey him -okay I never really obeyed - but I stayed out of most trouble because I didn't want to disappoint him
Disappointing someone is a big motivator for me. My father never spanked, my mother did. I respect my father a lot more, and I think it is part of that intimidation vs. caring type of parenting.