PlainlyOrdinary
05-04-06, 06:38 PM
i was so nervous about this. i hadn't been in to see him in over five years. i was afraid i'd completely misrepresent my symptoms and come off as either too enthusiastic about getting meds or worse, not descriptive enough. everything i was afraid about, as far as his receptiveness concerning stimulants, he proved me wrong about. he was so cool about it that i feel stupid now about being afraid to suggest that i, as an adult, have add.
i wasn't sure what i was going to say, so i made a list of the problem areas that were affecting my life the most. i also took in dr. amen's test and asked him to read it and all of the comments i made in the margins next to the questions. he said that he hadn't seen that particular questionnaire before and asked if he could keep it. he also gave me two other sets of questions to fill out.
after looking over the answers and asking me his own, much more specific questions about my answers, he felt that, based on my medical record's showing a long history of trying a litany of different antidepressant with no real improvement, that exploring treatment for my adhd symptoms was a good idea. also, given the fact that he treated my little sister for adhd years ago and that he's treated my dad for similar symptoms, he felt that it was a pretty safe bet.
now the best part is how open he is and how open he's allowing me to be with him. of course, he talked to me about straterra and how it's not a stimulant/schedule II drug, that refills are easier, etc. i told him that through my research, i came to the conclusion that because straterra is so much like other norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors i felt that i would more than likely have adverse reactions. and that i didn't want to have to wait 4-6 weeks just to discover that it makes me feel worse. i told him that i hope he didn't mind me doing my own research and making suggestions. it did my heart so well to hear him say, "it's up to you what course of treatment you want to take. i may be a doctor, but i'm not going to wag my finger in your face and make you try things that you don't want. we're partners in your treatment and you can tell me anything you feel that you need to and i'm not going to judge you." at that moment, i just eased up and told him that was a relief.
the appointment was only a 15 minute appointment, but he ended up talking with me for a little under an hour. i told him that i wanted to go on an immediate release stimulant(so i can control it more and not have the rollercoaster) and also back on effexor xr. even though i have theraputically used adderall, given to me by my dad, i said that i hadn't ever used a stimulant. i didn't want him to get any weird ideas. so, he ended up putting me on 10mg/adderall twice a day, for now. and until we find the correct dosage, that i should come in to see him twice a month. i have found this to be 30mg twice a day(but i will let him decide this in time--he's very open to patient input and i already trust him a lot. he's been my family's doctor for over a decade). but until we settle on a dosage that he's going to wait about putting me back on effexor xr.
all in all, i am so happy and relieved that after 2 years of being without health insurance or treatment, that i decided to take my mother's advice and go back to see my old doctor and not pick a new one. it's funny, he was the first to ever give me anti-deps around six years ago when i thougt i had anxiety/depression, figuring i was too old to have adhd. and then i went through three or four psychiatrists who, aside from one, never listened to me, thought i was bipolar, and medicated me with anti-deps and mood stabilisers and tranquilizers. all this did was, in effect, send me to bed for four years. i've come full circle and have found that my family doctor spent more time and effort talking to me and, more importantly, LISTENING to me than all of my years seeing psychiatrists.
i am happy to finally feel optimistic about seeking medical help.
okay, my story is over.
i wasn't sure what i was going to say, so i made a list of the problem areas that were affecting my life the most. i also took in dr. amen's test and asked him to read it and all of the comments i made in the margins next to the questions. he said that he hadn't seen that particular questionnaire before and asked if he could keep it. he also gave me two other sets of questions to fill out.
after looking over the answers and asking me his own, much more specific questions about my answers, he felt that, based on my medical record's showing a long history of trying a litany of different antidepressant with no real improvement, that exploring treatment for my adhd symptoms was a good idea. also, given the fact that he treated my little sister for adhd years ago and that he's treated my dad for similar symptoms, he felt that it was a pretty safe bet.
now the best part is how open he is and how open he's allowing me to be with him. of course, he talked to me about straterra and how it's not a stimulant/schedule II drug, that refills are easier, etc. i told him that through my research, i came to the conclusion that because straterra is so much like other norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors i felt that i would more than likely have adverse reactions. and that i didn't want to have to wait 4-6 weeks just to discover that it makes me feel worse. i told him that i hope he didn't mind me doing my own research and making suggestions. it did my heart so well to hear him say, "it's up to you what course of treatment you want to take. i may be a doctor, but i'm not going to wag my finger in your face and make you try things that you don't want. we're partners in your treatment and you can tell me anything you feel that you need to and i'm not going to judge you." at that moment, i just eased up and told him that was a relief.
the appointment was only a 15 minute appointment, but he ended up talking with me for a little under an hour. i told him that i wanted to go on an immediate release stimulant(so i can control it more and not have the rollercoaster) and also back on effexor xr. even though i have theraputically used adderall, given to me by my dad, i said that i hadn't ever used a stimulant. i didn't want him to get any weird ideas. so, he ended up putting me on 10mg/adderall twice a day, for now. and until we find the correct dosage, that i should come in to see him twice a month. i have found this to be 30mg twice a day(but i will let him decide this in time--he's very open to patient input and i already trust him a lot. he's been my family's doctor for over a decade). but until we settle on a dosage that he's going to wait about putting me back on effexor xr.
all in all, i am so happy and relieved that after 2 years of being without health insurance or treatment, that i decided to take my mother's advice and go back to see my old doctor and not pick a new one. it's funny, he was the first to ever give me anti-deps around six years ago when i thougt i had anxiety/depression, figuring i was too old to have adhd. and then i went through three or four psychiatrists who, aside from one, never listened to me, thought i was bipolar, and medicated me with anti-deps and mood stabilisers and tranquilizers. all this did was, in effect, send me to bed for four years. i've come full circle and have found that my family doctor spent more time and effort talking to me and, more importantly, LISTENING to me than all of my years seeing psychiatrists.
i am happy to finally feel optimistic about seeking medical help.
okay, my story is over.