View Full Version : Think I may be borderline


Jett
05-11-06, 09:29 AM
I think I may be borderline. Last time I told my therapist she told me that I don't need to be thinking I have all of these illnesses.

Now, I am no hypochondriac and have done a lot of research. I definately don't think I have everything and I definately don't consider myself having an illness just because I display only a few of the symptoms.

As of now, my therapist says that I definately have ADHD and definately have depression.

I have been researching borderline and I can relate to most of it.

For example, I have frequent bouts with depression, I make suicidal threats to manipulate people, I can't stand rejection or criticism, I have black and white thinking, and I sometimes don't know who I am. I am constantly changing my mind about everything and can't follow through on anything.

The most debilitating thing is that I am always fearful of being abandoned. If I make a friend I am terrified of doing something to ruin the friendship, I panic if they don't call me on time, and I have ruined relationships before by jumping to conclusions, being overly defensive, and my mood swings.

I can go from happy to sad to irritable very quickly, sometimes several times in a day. I have an explosive temper. I can have tantrums that last anywhere from 15 minutes to up to an hour. Usually only 15 minutes unless I want to do something really bad ( like go on a trip, etc) and I am not allowed to. One boyfriend I had, I was yelling and screaming at him because I found a note he had written to another woman. I cried and called him every name in the book. an hour later, we were laying in bed together. Yes, I can change that quickly.

My personality pretty well fits whoever I am with.

I don't cut myself but have been known to hurt myself several times in the past. I take people's opinions of me very seriously and if someone makes fun of me or criticizes me, I feel as if it is all about me and I feel like a piece of junk.

I hate feeling this way. I need treatment for these symptoms. If it isn't borderline then it must be something else but it just seems to fit me too well.

dormammau2008
05-12-06, 11:53 AM
its possbale jett id seek more ifon an a doc whos maybe bit more understndinf you dont strik me as someone who thinks they have eveything so why the doc should think that is behond me dorm

QueensU_girl
05-12-06, 12:16 PM
A lot of people have problems like you describe -- with what is called "Emotional Regulation".

Ask your Doctor about that topic.

PS. I understand that DBT (dialectic behavior therapy) really helps. Have you checked out TARA or BPDcentral's websites?

sloppitty-sue
05-13-06, 06:48 PM
JETT!! OMG! I SO identify with your thinking you "are Borderline." I said the same thing to my therapist too, and she said the same thing to ME that yours did.

For some reason I don't really care about it anymore. I know that my therapist understands the "severity" of my poor coping behaviors.

Hope you have (or GET) a good therapist too and find some resolution to what's concerning you soon.

Sincerely,
Sue