View Full Version : Experience with ADD Coaching


JH376
11-02-03, 08:47 PM
I found that everything made sense when my coach and I were talking, but as soon as I left her office I would just drop it. I guess there was no accountability.

I also tried being coached by the shrink who diagnosed me. He gave me a piece of paper listing all the things I should be doing. When I came in next time, he got kind of mad at me for not having either tried, or followed though on any of it.

I've tried all kinds of time-mgt courses, life-mgt courses, therapists, books, not to mention being given "suggestions my whole life- first from my parents and teachers, then from my wife and bosses. None, or at least very little of it seems to stick.

As you all get to know me, you'll see I like a lot to make analogies, and I feel one coming on right now: thinking about this topic makes feel like a kid who's on a bike, being pushed by someone. As soon as they stop pushing me, though, I stop rolling. It's like I'm coasting on a bike on sand! Has anyone else had that experience?

I don't know if I expect too much of myself, like the habits I'm supposed to be learning are supposed to become automatic, but when they require any kind of extended effort, I just stop trying them out.

Wheel1975
11-02-03, 09:03 PM
Originally posted by JH376
I found that everything made sense when my coach and I were talking, but as soon as I left her office I would just drop it. I guess there was no accountability.

I also tried being coached by the shrink who diagnosed me. He gave me a piece of paper listing all the things I should be doing. When I came in next time, he got kind of mad at me for not having either tried, or followed though on any of it.

I've tried all kinds of time-mgt courses, life-mgt courses, therapists, books, not to mention being given "suggestions my whole life- first from my parents and teachers, then from my wife and bosses. None, or at least very little of it seems to stick.

As you all get to know me, you'll see I like a lot to make analogies, and I feel one coming on right now: thinking about this topic makes feel like a kid who's on a bike, being pushed by someone. As soon as they stop pushing me, though, I stop rolling. It's like I'm coasting on a bike on sand! Has anyone else had that experience?

I don't know if I expect too much of myself, like the habits I'm supposed to be learning are supposed to become automatic, but when they require any kind of extended effort, I just stop trying them out.

I have become less interested in "guessing" reasons (I tend to think they are ALL wrong!) and more in simply trying to characterize what really happens... (When I am alone, I don't get things done.)

Blame is, or so far has been, of very little positive use.

In every case where I have clearly identified what doesn't work, and quit signing up to do what doesn't work, I cease to FAIL. This is the hard part. I am SO easy to convince to "try to do it."

THAT is foolish.

There are things I can do in the company of others that I don't get done when alone. The trick? Get someone to do them with. Not always so easy or possible.

There are other things that get done when I get someone else to do them. These groups of things need to be segregated.

Doing something ONCE or occasionally on my own is not enough. We need to be talking, always can do when....

What is the answer to: It always gets done when:? That then is the base, nothing else.

IMHO

Tara
11-02-03, 10:08 PM
What type of coach did you work with? Was this person an ADD coach or just a general life coach?

Ian
11-28-03, 01:07 AM
Wheel1975 your comments sure rung a bell with me.

My coach was the local mental health nurse as I have mentioned before I think. She was very effective, but I gather that she really did not see the merrits of what was happening during the sessions. We met for an hour once every three weeks or so, sometimes weekly over a couple of years.

When she suggested we shut down the sessions sometime earlier this year I was not happy. I didn't know enough to back up my ideas that stopping would lead to bad places.

Right from the time I quit seeing her on a regular basis I began to spiral down.. and finally went to see our family doctor and asked for help. She recommended some chemical intervention. Once the dope kicked in I slowly have been building back up to the point where I can stay mobile. Now it's a month and a half I think since I started first with the drugs.

I want to begin to make a case to have this nurse continue to coach me on a long term basis. I don't think she is a skilled adhd coach in any way but irrespecitve of that she was very effective in implementing some constructive guidance.

I will scour this forum and others for some of the attributes of coaching others have found useful. Thanks for your post. My eyes are being opened almost hourly.

Cheers.. Ian.

bluesman
06-08-04, 04:25 PM
I asked about coaching too. It seems like a legitimate way to make a gratifying living. Probably won't do anything about it :). But I'd still like to know as much as possible about it.

Has anyone heard of Dr. Weathers? I searched 'adhd treatment' and he came up. http://www.adhdhelp.org/

I just plain didn't like the guy at first. But I forced myself to be open minded and I understand where he is coming from. On one hand is seems like a brutal tx or another "program". On the other hand, when I looked at some of the things he talked about, i realized that they are true in my life. So I'm just wondering what anyone else thinks.

Tim