There is a "Friendship Club" social skills group that one of the therapy centers is running this summer, but the schedule is such that it would cause her to be late every day for a band camp that she really wants to do -- and I don't want to add another reason for her to feel set apart from the other kids at band camp.

What is the best way to help her learn some coping skills this summer? Individual therapy? We've done that in the past, and I think it helped but it seems that a group approach is considered more effective.


Moderator's Note: You can read the rest of this post down on post #13.

I'm 53 years old and last week a new therapist gave me some excersizes to do to help with emotional, impulsive responses. I'm a big blurter.
"mindfullness" - I LOVE that word.

Before responding to or initiating a response
1. stop and review who you're talking to, why and evaluate the situation
2. consider the options of a response: do nothing, positive, negative, etc.
3. choose an option
4. deliver it

This has been incredible for me. I've been using it for just about everything I do. It's helped me focus on the task at hand too. "mindfulness"

I like "mindfulness" -- I can use that for myself, too. (I learned the hard way last week to reflect a while first before pressing "send" in email -- yeah, I'm probably undiagnosed AD/HD. ;) )

One problem with the dd is that at the ripe old age of 11 -- Mom doesn't know anything anymore. I can give her advice out the wazoo but it seems to "stick" better if it comes from a neutral 3rd party. I do plan to get her some books recommended on other threads so she can read up on her issues herself.

There is a "Friendship Club" social skills group that one of the therapy centers is running this summer, but the schedule is such that it would cause her to be late every day for a band camp that she really wants to do -- and I don't want to add another reason for her to feel set apart from the other kids at band camp.I want to second this thought -- I doubt she'll learn anything in group that's valuable enough to offset causing a problem in an area she loves. I was a band kid and that was were I found my place to fit in junior high and high school. I think having a special skill and an area to shine is incredibly important to self esteem and is a great place to make friends.

What is the best way to help her learn some coping skills this summer? Individual therapy? We've done that in the past, and I think it helped but it seems that a group approach is considered more effective.Group is usually better but if individual has worked well before with your daughter it might be a good avenue again. Family therapy is also an effective medium -- that way you can reinforce at home what she's hearing in session.

Is your daughter on medication -- meds often help with picking up on those social cues and remembering and applying what is learned in therapy. Also taping therapy session with the counselor's permission can be very helpful for forgetful ADDers (I know it sure helped me and I've heard it has been effective for others as well).

Scattered

Scattered: yes, she takes Strattera though we are planning to take her off of it for the summer.

Whoops, does anyone know what happened to the first 2 paragraphs of my OP?? It says last edited by Scattered?? I'm new to this forum, but I thought only posters could edit their own posts?

Scattered: yes, she takes Strattera though we are planning to take her off of it for the summer.Have you ever tried her on ADHD stimulent medication? Dr. Dodson (who runs a ADHD clinic and does research on medication) told us at the ADHD conference that Strattera only works for half of the folks who take it and only half as well for them. Now I assume he wasn't quoting exact statistics, but the general message was clear.

Scattered

Whoops, does anyone know what happened to the first 2 paragraphs of my OP?? It says last edited by Scattered?? I'm new to this forum, but I thought only posters could edit their own posts?:o :o :o Have you checked your private messages? I PM'd you an explanation. Moderators of a particular section can also edit your responses. Unfortuantely the edit button and quote button are side by side. I got up at 3:20 this morning to take my in-laws to the airport, so I'm a little tired besides being a lot ADD and managed to hit the wrong button. I am very sorry -- I thought about trying to recreate what you wrote but figured I'd just screw it up worse. Many apologies.

Scattered

That's interesting, Scattered -- I've been thinking about taking her for a complete AD/HD workup. She was diagnosed back in 2nd grade. Since we moved here 2 years ago, I've just been getting the Strattera refilled through her pediatrician. We don't have a relationship with a psych person here. Is it a good idea to get re-evaluated every few years??

:o :o :o Have you checked your private messages? I PM'd you an explanation. Moderators of a particular section can also edit your responses. Unfortuantely the edit button and quote button are side by side. I got up at 3:20 this morning to take my in-laws to the airport, so I'm a little tired besides being a lot ADD and managed to hit the wrong button. I am very sorry -- I thought about trying to recreate what you wrote but figured I'd just screw it up worse. Many apologies.

Scattered
No prob! :) It says I have no PM's currently -- am I missing something there?

Can I re-edit the OP?

No prob! :) It says I have no PM's currently -- am I missing something there?

Can I re-edit the OP?Maybe I ought to go to bed -- I definately wrote you a PM but I can't find it either in my sent box.:rolleyes: I wonder where I sent it?:eyebrow:

As far as putting the information back in the original post you can PM the information to me and I can cut and paste it over for you into your first post. You can only edit your own posts for a half hour or so -- I on the other hand can mess it up at any time!:eek:

Scattered

That's interesting, Scattered -- I've been thinking about taking her for a complete AD/HD workup. She was diagnosed back in 2nd grade. Since we moved here 2 years ago, I've just been getting the Strattera refilled through her pediatrician. We don't have a relationship with a psych person here. Is it a good idea to get re-evaluated every few years??It's not a bad idea for a couple of reasons:

First -- it would be a good idea to have someone look to see if there are any comorbid (ugly word for other) conditions involved. A fairly high percentage of kids also have a specific learning disability and issues like anxiety and depression aren't uncommon.

Second -- it's good to have a relationship with a good resource person for the long haul. Both as a support and resource for you and your daughter and as a potential advocate with the school system if special accomodations are needed. I have a bias toward clinical psychologists who specialize in ADHD at least for the evaluation.

Scattered

I'll just re-cap for anyone who is still reading. ;) :D

11 y.o. daughter, just finished 5th grade, MUCH happier and relaxed these last few days than she has been in a long time -- says it is because she is not being teased.

I'm trying to find local resources for social skills training or a similar program that will help her cope in her new magnet middle school next year and make new friends. She is gifted and ADD, and has been academically successful but socially not.

Unfortunately, neither of the 2 girls she is most buddies with are going to her new school. I tried to talk her into going to a different magnet program where she would know more people, but she was set on the one she is going to, which has a science and technology focus.