View Full Version : Questions


snuffleupagus
06-19-06, 12:53 AM
I've suspected I've had ADD for over a year now, and didn't know what kind of relationship related effects it could have until about half a year ago.
Anyways, this is how I've always been:
I am generally friendly, and a good guy. I do have mood swings, and I do get aggressive but not around my friends that much. Thing is, I simply don't care about them. I don't really know but, it is like when I am away from them for more than a minute or two I forget that I even had fun when I was with them. I'll get invited to parties and not go because I don't really care to. If a family member goes away for an extended period of time, almost right after they are gone, I don't even care or miss them. I'm talking leaving the airport here.
If I fight with someone, I generally get really moody during the fight, and calm down very very quickly afterwards, and sometimes I wonder why I lose control, but even though I'm not really angry anymore, I still just don't really care to bother speaking to them.
It seems like once they are gone for a little while, it doesn't matter anymore, I forget what things were like and so I don't really care anymore.
Any advice?

livinginchaos
07-27-06, 12:00 PM
hey snuffleupagus!!

I'm sorry it's taken so long for someone to reply!

It sounds kind of like "out of sight, out of mind" How old are you?

You might want to check out therapy. I used to be a bit aggressive and a very angry person and therapy helped me work through it. I'm so patient, my friends are always very surprised if I tell them I used to have a horrid temper.

Courtney

VisualImagery
07-27-06, 12:06 PM
I have to agree with Chaos. My temper has improved greatly. People are surprised when I tell them about my temper. It's nice to blame it on being Irish. :D

My daughter has a temper and it is getting better now that she is happier. So I have to agree that counseling will help you tremendously. You also need to talk to your med doc about making sure you are enough medication to control your symptoms.

Take care and let us know how you are doing.

RADD

Aizlyne
07-27-06, 12:58 PM
I also seem to have a problem with the kind of apathy you describe when it comes to close friends or family. I dont' get sad when people leave, even if I"m really close to them. I havn't been with one of my best friends in almost a year and I"m not really that concerned about it. It isn't that I don;t like her, I just don't seem to miss her when she's gone.

My temper has always been internalized. Although if I get really ****ed I have been known to be very spiteful with my words. I"m violent, just verbaly nasty. But it's rare when I express my anger openly.

dormammau2008
07-28-06, 07:24 PM
i know louds peps but i woudst say i have meany freinds maybe 4 in the world id call a freind an trust it deps how they take me an treat me ....if there gone there gone ...........if there a true freind then i allways make time for them dorm

Lesovaren
08-15-06, 02:29 AM
I am just like you i wondered if it was just part of being myself possibley as a result of having a single parent and getting over that possibley making me defunct when it comes to expressing emotions. But in contrast i find that i am intensley passionate about relationships. Maybe it is a case of not being able to choose your familly? I also experience the same thing with friends,familly pets but not with my girlfriend so what gives?

Lesovaren
08-15-06, 02:33 AM
out of the people who seem to share the whole apathy facet of ADD have any of you taken part in the DORE program or are currently talking part in said program?? I have no idea if it is going to help me. Your description of your apathy extends to other areas of my life lots of people with ADD tend to have problems relating tenses thinking about the future in terms of the present i feel like if things happen to me i am completely detached and i find myself an extremely self analytical but emotional in relation to my partner

Chele77
08-15-06, 06:41 AM
Snuffleupagus,

hmm, I always thought it was just me (yup, I said that again)....I am especially this way with friends. I think about how much energy they seem to zap out of me, I rarely miss people and I frequently say no to invitations for the same reason you do, I simply have zero interest in them.
Do you find that you resent it if you have to attend something you don't want to? (for example if it is a work related party or something)

~boots~
08-15-06, 01:00 PM
Snuffleupagus,

hmm, I always thought it was just me (yup, I said that again)....I am especially this way with friends. I think about how much energy they seem to zap out of me, I rarely miss people and I frequently say no to invitations for the same reason you do, I simply have zero interest in them.
Do you find that you resent it if you have to attend something you don't want to? (for example if it is a work related party or something)I can be like that a lot too Chele:(
out of site-out of mind is another one of my annoying habits...

dormammau2008
08-15-06, 05:22 PM
your necer outer sight tracy we all have annoying habits....just be yourself as do we all....dorm

CarpeDiem
08-19-06, 10:31 PM
It seems to me that people can be like other things are to us when we have ADD. Something else that is expected to hold our attention. Unless a what a person is doing or saying is fascinating to us for some, usually temporary, reason, it kinda makes sense that we would rather be doing something more stimulating. And while they're talking to us, our minds drift to a topic that demands more thinking about. I always felt like a jerk when I realized I would rather think about or do something else, especially when it came to a significant other. That isn't to say I don't have a lot of really focused conversations. I love learning from other people's experiences!