I have a dilemma. I got diagnosed last spring for ADHD but they doctor gave me the diagnoses Mild Neurocognitive disoder due to epilepsy. I hate the diagnoses the name is so generic and doesnt help me get the accommodations I need in college. The student affairs director doesnt know what accommodations to give me to help me


The reason I decided to post this thread is my heart is torn between the love I have for my sister and parents, what i need to do for me, and what I want to do for myself.

Okay here it goes. Last yeare I began college to get my Bachlors degree in education. I have an associate which is a 2 yr degree. I want to go forward. To get my degree. It is important to me to get the degree, I have never really worked up to my potential in my life because there were other problems at home or at school with the kids that seemed to get in the way.

I had a hard time growing up, I was an angry child, i was beat up alot at school in junior high. Back to the reason for my post... I want to get my degree for me . I need to prove to myself that that I can do it.

A few weeks ago my sister and mom had a conversation about my life. OH i know that they love me and my sister is being a good sister by sharing her feeling with me, like it should be. My sister feels that I should just forget about college and not put myself through the hard times of frustration I have had in school all mylife. They6 want me to do something different, like a school guard or teacher aide. I was in tears when my sister was telling me how she felt or what she was feeling inside.

We talked about Dustin, my nephew was just diagnose with a reading problem. Well , they are going to try a school for him that deal with getting to the core of the degree. He wont have to take all the other classes just the core classes.

I dont want that, I want the college scene for me.. I like to be around alot of people and I like the interaction with the teacher and students. I know i have alot to learn but I know i can do it. I feel like they dont think I can do this and are putting me in another category... like I was put in high school ... being considered a slow learner back then they didnt talk about ADHD.

I am so confused how to handle this situation. I know everyone including me is worried about the money issue when it comes to my tution and books. I cnat afford to have a huge debt. My dad doesnt want the family name associated with bad credit. I feel like my parent are holding me back in some ways but I dont want to be held back but dont know how to do what I want with out upsetting my place in the family dynamics.

Here is the clincher. I am 47 and my sister says who is going to hirer someone your age who has not had a job in yrs. Is she right? I dont know what to do. Help:foot::soapbox::confused:

Hi Chris,

Good for you for wanting to go back to college :) I think your family is just concerned for you, but wouldn't it be great to prove them wrong--the plus side, at the end, they'll be proud of you as well. I really see it as a potential win-win. And why should you settle?

Maybe I'm not understanding how this is a choice between you and your family--would your going back to school affect other commitments that you've made to your family? If not, and its just that they don't think you should take the path you want to, then really, you're just making a decision for yourself that they may not agree with--and that's OK, right? This decision will only affect you, right? My family (lovingly) also has lots of advice for me....but if I listened to all of thier suggestions, I may not have ended up chosing a career path that I truly love. I would have been a miserable failed pre-med student, or an accountant ready to pull my hair out.

Also, you mention your dad not wanting bad credit for your family....again, how does YOUR bad credit (if you have it) affect anyone else in your family?

Maybe I'm missng something here, but from what I see, you should go for your goals, and not worry about what your family thinks. And now taht you know about your ADD, I'm sure you'll suceed :) And then won't your family be glad that you didn't listen to them? :)

Best of luck! I'm really rooting for you :)

I think what my parents and sister are worried about is the loans. At the present time I am on Social Security. I was on SSI but it was changed over when my dad retired.
I know they are worried about the loans I have taken out last yr. They keep telling me what is wrong with being on Social Security.

I have lots of medical issues psychiatrist , psychologist bill and they are worried how would I pay all those bill if i got off of my government funding. They are in there seventies. I know there thinking is different at this age and grew up in the depression time. I just want to be like everyone else. I dont think they understand that either. I am at alose of what to do.

Chris, IMHO, I think you should get the help you deserve, and stay in school...
If you feel you need to do it, and I know you really want to do it, and if you feel you will be able to pay off the debts when you work full time, then girl..go for it:p
It will be great to be off social security, with a good paying job...your parents will be proud when you are a teacher and supporting yourself ..

Okay this is my delima. I am scared to death. I am afraid to get off social security.
I think my parents have held me back so much even though they are doing what they know through love.

I feel like I am being treated like a sick child / adult. I am not sure about paying off the debt , and it scares me. what is the norm to take out. I am at a private school now and love the atmosphere, and feel guilty because my sister said she would have never have choosen a private school. I know the school learning disability isnt the best but I want to go back I have missed it so much since I have been healing from a broken foot.

Does going back to school disqualify you for SS? If so, do you realistically have the finances to live while you're at school (food, etc.) Also, have you applied for finacial aide? The nice thing about student loans is that you don't have to pay anything while you're in school, and then only have to make monthly payments after graduation....have you filled out the fasfa forms?

Maybe the real issue here is about finances, and simply figuring out the logistics of getting this done? I think you'll do great :) And you'll most likly have a better income after graduation anyways, so you'll make up for the finance part of it anyways.

Yeah I think you are right. I think this is about fiances and fear on my part.
I am tired of people tell me Naw take the easy route.
Dont put your self through this torture.

I already have applied for the fafsa. YOu have to every year. I would be commuting. I have my own appartment and No , any money that I get for school can not hinder my social security money, or my food or medical insurance.

I know they are worried aobut me getting a job after gradution and to be honest I am afraid. Will I make it through. I have had teacher tell me because last yr i have had some out burst that they have reservations about me being a lead teacher. That really hurt. I have always wanted to be a teacher. I am sensitive and take thing to heart sometimes.
My therapist says we can work on that in therapy. I cant wait to get back in therapy with him in august. Well what is the average amout to take out in loans for the semester? I am scared so much. I have never been able to stand up for my self with my parents of my family. I feel like they see me as this sick adult who is smart but should not be in school. I dnt know i feel like i rambling now. will stop.

Chris,

Going back to school to get a degree is a smart decision, especially if you're going into education. You will have little problem getting hired due to the dire need for able and trained educators. They will have you for at least 15 years, and that's better than having no teachers at all. Also, I'm not sure what state you live in, but I know that in Georgia, they have a special full scholarship for students who major in education and keep their GPA at 3.0 or higher. The only stipulation is that you have to attend a public college or university.

I would hate to advise you to do anything that diverts you from your dream of earning a degree at the school of your choice, but perhaps a compromise can be made with your family. There are many public colleges/universities that offer great programs that meet or exceed the quality standards of private colleges/universities. Going to a public institution would definately lower your loans significantly, especially one that is in-state.

However, student loans traditionally have the lowest interest rates so you could get a signficant loan and pay it back (consolidated) at a comfortable monthly rate; albeit, it may be for the rest of your life. No doubt, education is an excellent reason to have some debt.

Being a student is tough, and being a non-traditional student is even tougher. I know from personal experience. My family didn't believe in me either until I proved it to them when I obtained my Bachelors and again when I obtained my Masters.

Getting to the point of graduation took sacrifice and unrelenting determination. To save money, I worked two jobs and lived with my parents (although, I would not advise working at all during graduate school). I threw any sense of pride aside and just bit the bullet. "All of this B.S. will be over in just a couple of years..." I just told myself that over and over again. Whatever you do: DON'T GIVE UP! Just keep going....don't stop! You CAN do it. You WILL do it.

Good luck, girl!

-Banana

Chris,

Going back to school to get a degree is a smart decision, especially if you're going into education. You will have little problem getting hired due to the dire need for able and trained educators. They will have you for at least 15 years, and that's better than having no teachers at all. Also, I'm not sure what state you live in, but I know that in Georgia, they have a special full scholarship for students who major in education and keep their GPA at 3.0 or higher. The only stipulation is that you have to attend a public college or university.

I would hate to advise you to do anything that diverts you from your dream of earning a degree at the school of your choice, but perhaps a compromise can be made with your family. There are many public colleges/universities that offer great programs that meet or exceed the quality standards of private colleges/universities. Going to a public institution would definately lower your loans significantly, especially one that is in-state.

However, student loans traditionally have the lowest interest rates so you could get a signficant loan and pay it back (consolidated) at a comfortable monthly rate; albeit, it may be for the rest of your life. No doubt, education is an excellent reason to have some debt.

Being a student is tough, and being a non-traditional student is even tougher. I know from personal experience. My family didn't believe in me either until I proved it to them when I obtained my Bachelors and again when I obtained my Masters.

Getting to the point of graduation took sacrifice and unrelenting determination. To save money, I worked two jobs and lived with my parents (although, I would not advise working at all during graduate school). I threw any sense of pride aside and just bit the bullet. "All of this B.S. will be over in just a couple of years..." I just told myself that over and over again. Whatever you do: DON'T GIVE UP! Just keep going....don't stop! You CAN do it. You WILL do it.

Good luck, girl!

-Banana
I am in the state of ohio. Yeah you are right about lowering my loans by going to a public school, i just felt that I would get more attention in a small school. I felt i would do better in a small college. Do you have information about that scholarship.

Oh yes I would have to commute. I have lived on my own for over 14 yrs. and I have a puppy dog. I dont want to give her up. I know my age is a disadvantage .. i hope not too much.

I'm afraid that scholarship is for Georgia students. Don't worry about your age. I had plenty of classmates that shared your age or higher, and they did just fine. Sounds like your school offers what you need, although I would continue to research other options. Hang in there!