Deviate4420
11-19-03, 12:13 AM
Hi, i'm 20 years old. I'v been diagnosed with ADD and prescribed Adderall (20 mg daily). I'v only been on it for a year now, i went almost all my life untreated which is the pitfall in my existance. When they tried to treat me as a kid i went through severe denial and my parents thought they were doing me more harm than good.
I'm not evan sure for how long, probably almost as long as i can remember i'v went through spells of hoplessness and somewhat steady feelings of self worthlessness. My doctor was very careful to ask about this and i told her that as far as i could see it was just relative to having add. The adderall has helped with concentration and focus but i still have these feelings quite a bit. I'v been reading up on different forms of depression and it doesn't seem to have any patterns to it like bipolar but it seems to be triggered by small things sometimes very insignificant. Like maybe i have manic depression. I'v always thought it was just the add and my low self esteem, beating myself up inside and not letting things go when i should, but it still persists.
I also have alot of social issues too, i was picked on alot as a kid which is painful when i think about it. Evan to this day almost all of my friends have either been my friends since elementry school or are ppl i'v met through other friends. I'v only dated one girl briefly my entire life, and god knows that's not because i havent tried. Sometimes it seems like girls like what they see and then are turned off when they get to know me, evan though i try to be the sweetest and kindest person possible. The three months i was in that relationship was the last time i remember really feeling unbridled happiness. Evan then i would get down from time to time though, being unemployed, out of school, and away from some of my close friends for the first time.
What i'm trying to find out is do i have another condition along with add or maybe evan instead of it that can be treated medically?. Or do i just have personal issues from not being treated for all those years and having what i think to be a semi rough childhood?. I looked into seeing a therapist before but it didn't work out so i just finally decided to try and work it out on my own. If anyone could give me there input it would be greatly appreciated....Thanx....Andy
I'm not evan sure for how long, probably almost as long as i can remember i'v went through spells of hoplessness and somewhat steady feelings of self worthlessness. My doctor was very careful to ask about this and i told her that as far as i could see it was just relative to having add. The adderall has helped with concentration and focus but i still have these feelings quite a bit. I'v been reading up on different forms of depression and it doesn't seem to have any patterns to it like bipolar but it seems to be triggered by small things sometimes very insignificant. Like maybe i have manic depression. I'v always thought it was just the add and my low self esteem, beating myself up inside and not letting things go when i should, but it still persists.
I also have alot of social issues too, i was picked on alot as a kid which is painful when i think about it. Evan to this day almost all of my friends have either been my friends since elementry school or are ppl i'v met through other friends. I'v only dated one girl briefly my entire life, and god knows that's not because i havent tried. Sometimes it seems like girls like what they see and then are turned off when they get to know me, evan though i try to be the sweetest and kindest person possible. The three months i was in that relationship was the last time i remember really feeling unbridled happiness. Evan then i would get down from time to time though, being unemployed, out of school, and away from some of my close friends for the first time.
What i'm trying to find out is do i have another condition along with add or maybe evan instead of it that can be treated medically?. Or do i just have personal issues from not being treated for all those years and having what i think to be a semi rough childhood?. I looked into seeing a therapist before but it didn't work out so i just finally decided to try and work it out on my own. If anyone could give me there input it would be greatly appreciated....Thanx....Andy