First the rant:

My husband and I have just moved from northern Michigan to Florida (Tampa area). Having only been here a week, I'm still very new to the roads, how crazy drivers are in Florida (which is saying something after living 10 years in Detroit) and my new car which is half again as long as my old one (also only had the the car a week) Needless to say, driving is a VERY overwhelming experience. When I can I hop in and just drive around alone to get familar with the roads and the drivers etc. Well this evening my hubby and I had to go to the store so he can get some supplies for school. First he starts with the snide remark about do I even know where the store is? When I miss my turn because a duallie (truck with dual rear tires) has stopped in the right hand lane, he yells at me for missing the turn. When I ask why he has to yell at me in the car he says that if I wasn't a terrible driver and would just learn to drive better he wouldn't yell. (it is interesting to note that when we got the Florida car insureance, my record was clean, his upped our rates) I tried pointing out to him that I am trying to learn but that his yelling is what is making me a worse driver. I didn't even bother bringing up the ADHD.

Now the questions:
Has anyone else found that their driving changed when on meds?
How do you deal with all the stimulus of driving in a new place? Especially when not on meds?
How do you deal with the other people in the car? Especially when they keep making you upset (which is the first thing listed on conditions that make drivers distracted)
Is traffic in Florida always so insane on the surface roads?

Any tips and advice would be great. Thanks

I don't know about Florida, but DC (and some areas of MD) drivers always drive in hyperspeed.

It took me a while to get used to it, but once I figured out that I needed to be waaaaaaaaay more aggressive while driving, it was ok.

I drive about the same, on or off ADHD meds.
And I get lost, directionwise, about the same, too.

I'm fine with other people in the car, as long as one of them, doesn't crank the radio to a ridiculously loud level.


Nova

1. If you don't feel like it would put your life in danger, let him drive. Then he can't yell at you for being a "terrible driver."

2. I started meds last week and haven't noticed much difference.

3.I don't like driving in unfamiliar places, especially in heavy traffic. The concentration it takes to find something you are looking for while dodging idiots is very stressful.

4.If I'm driving and my wife is hollering at me, I just try to ignore her. But then, being a man, I guess that part comes naturally to me. Ha!

5.As far as Florida traffic goes, I dunno. But I live in a Houston, Tx. suburb and I have a 40 mile commute to work, one way, so I know a thing or two about traffic and I hate it.

I guess the most important thing to remember is that every car on the road is trying to hit you and you should always leave yourself an escape. Don't be too hard on yourself, when you are a little more familiar with the roads and traffic patterns, you can avoid some situations that are particularly stressful. I don't know about your husband yelling at you, but sometimes I "yell" at my wife but I just think I'm saying things "louder" and with "more of a sense of urgency." Hopefully he's just doing what I'm guilty of doing. To her, it's yelling, and she's right. But that doesn't mean that I intended to come across that way.

Has anyone else found that their driving changed when on meds?

Yes!!! I prefer not to drive at all when not properly medicated. Its just too darn distracting otherwise!

How do you deal with all the stimulus of driving in a new place? Especially when not on meds?

Ugh...I take it very slowly until I can anticipate the "usual distractions" like which stores will have glaring neon signs after dark, for example.

I do not drive in new places off meds, period. I try hard to let someone else drive in new places until I grow accustomed to the expected distraction level.

How do you deal with the other people in the car? Especially when they keep making you upset (which is the first thing listed on conditions that make drivers distracted)

My family all knows and respects my level of functioning with ADHD. They also know I can and will pull over and refuse to drive at all if they do not heed my warnings. IMO it is better to risk embarrassment than to risk possible injury.


Is traffic in Florida always so insane on the surface roads?

My only memories of Fla. is that its very flat...but SC is insane in its own way. Very non-ADD friendly (the sign for the highway you are approaching will more than likely be miles ahead of the exit) and for some reason they believe the passing lane is on the right!

Luck to ya!

Crazy

The worst thing about driving in a new area, is when the streets have a name AND a route number.

Some exits off the freeway will take you to a street with a 'name'...and the next exit down, will take you to that same street..except it now has a route number, which you aren't familiar with.

Maybe I'm on a tangent, because I encounter this all the time, now...and it's a headache for me !!

I never got so lost, in my driving history, as I do now...so it can't be 'all me'.


Nova


Nova

I've always been absolutely amazed whenever I hear that ADD'ers are prone to vehicle accidents because I am an excellent driver. I love driving, always like to drive, and if anything, my reputation from friends is that I'm boring to ride with! No fast acceleration (gee....I must be a real JERK for actually liking good gas mileage, huh?) no passengers getting intertiad into my windows, etc....
I was that way for 10 years prior to diagnosis and I'm still that way.

Maybe it's because my dad taught driver's Ed. but I actually don't think so. I feel most relaxed and in control when driving.

My meds don't change anything about my driving except that if I'm a little tired, they will help me stay alert.


I always tell people that the best way to approach driving is to ALWAYS drive the way you would want your own kids to drive.

I always tell people that the best way to approach driving is to ALWAYS drive the way you would want your own kids to drive.

Easy enough..if they have kids, that is.

Otherwise, the 'grownups' are the kids. :p

Oh, I'm childless. But that doesn't mean I can't envision!

Has anyone else found that their driving changed when on meds?

Not really when it comes to heavy traffic, but boring trips I am less apt to speed in an effort to get it over with. I learned to drive in Dallas back when I was a stoner and lived to write about it(shrug). The big city traffic will make me nervous when I first begin approaching it but I am toooo easily distracted by the need to focus on so many other cars to stay nervous. Three minutes into big city traffic I am like a duck in water . . . . .born crazy I guess. :rolleyes: My driving record has improved sense I began meds due to the drastic decrease in speeding tickets. I used receive them on boring familiar routes.





How do you deal with all the stimulus of driving in a new place? Especially when not on meds?

I make sure I have plenty of gas in the car and plenty of time to get where I am going. I do try to obtain a map before leaving however I know getting lost is a matter of how many times and for how long each time :o . . .so I actually plan for it. Getting lose it is simply part of my life . . .I have acclimated. I am actually good at getting lost because I don’t freak and can usually think my way out of it.





Is traffic in Florida always so insane on the surface roads?

I have been to Florida and the drivers there seem as insane as the drivers in Tulsa, Houston, Austin and Cleveland. It all boils down to the more people there are on the road the crazier traffic things get.





How do you deal with the other people in the car? Especially when they keep making you upset (which is the first thing listed on conditions that make drivers distracted)

Simple I don’t.

I will ask politely only once (if I am medicated) that the yelling cease and desist, immediately, no excuses, end of conversation (btw-yabut is a town in Israel)

If that approach doesn’t work at the next opportune moment I will slam on the breaks and give them two choices:

#1 shut the _ _ _ k up (not one more &^%$ word)

#2) or get out and walk. . . (I don’t care if it is raining, a blizzard or 110 degrees)

Continue to yell and things will get very ugly very rapidly (ie you just thought my driving was bad). I simply do not put up with this behavior at all from any one, especially when driving in my own car.

My thoughts on the matter :Ya knew I was driving when you got in, you choose to get in way, deal with it . . . quietly or I will give ya a reason for screaming! :eek: :D

I will ask politely only once (if I am medicated) that the yelling cease and desist, immediately, no excuses, end of conversation (btw-yabut is a town in Israel)

If that approach doesn’t work at the next opportune moment I will slam on the breaks and give them two choices:

#1 shut the _ _ _ k up (not one more &^%$ word)

#2) or get out and walk. . . (I don’t care if it is raining, a blizzard or 110 degrees)

Continue to yell and things will get very ugly very rapidly (ie you just thought my driving was bad). I simply do not put up with this behavior at all from any one, especially when driving in my own car.

My thoughts on the matter :Ya knew I was driving when you got in, you choose to get in way, deal with it . . . quietly or I will give ya a reason for screaming!
Right ON! Runs in the family...and no doubt my anxiety when distracted is higher than yours when driving alone, that's why I am the Missing Link after all :D...and then I flip to your mode when driving with others.

Story from back in the days of having 7 kids/stepkids...ask me about that sometime.

Crazy

Thanks for all the great tips folks. It's really helpful and supportive. It's so nice to know that a) other people feel like this too and b) insane drivers are EVERYWHERE.

My thoughts on the matter :Ya knew I was driving when you got in, you choose to get in way, deal with it . . . quietly or I will give ya a reason for screaming! :eek: :D I love this. I'm printing it on a sticker and putting it on the passenger side sun flappy thing just for him.

Hubby and I worked the issue out...by which I mean he drove on our date last night. Got lost I might add.

I am thinking about this one Proscrire will have more input later.

Wondering :D Should this go in the Women's Forum. :D

RADD

I am thinking about this one Proscrire will have more input later.

Wondering :D Should this go in the Women's Forum. :D

RADD:eyebrow: absolutely NOT!!

Gotta ask BDH what he has to say about this later on today...my unmedicated driving scares the bejeebers outta him and I never even knew what a bejeeber was until his came rushing at me.


Crazy

Please don't move it. I really am more concerned with dealing with the driving and with the hubby's reaction. I have a clean record and great insurance rates and don't want to mess that up. The more commentary the better, in my mind.

Story from back in the days of having 7 kids/stepkids...ask me about that sometime.


I remember kids in the car fighting and yelling, I can tolerate children’s behavior to some degree, as long as they aren’t screaming at me or beating each other bloody with stuff they found on the floor.

In extreme case where their behavior is dangerously distracting (and would be to a deaf NTer with the nerves of steal)

I have been known to pull over stop the car, haul children out and apply firm rapid pressure in a repeated fashion using my hand on the posterior aspects of their anatomy. Unless they too are old enough and we are close enough for them to get out and walk! Trips in the car and children engaging in extreme distracting behavior (i.e. spitting, loogie flicking, throwing stuff that could hit me in the head , swinging fist, sticks, belts, feet ect) is one time I will use “corporal punishment” I mean what was I going in the middle of BFE 200 miles from home send them to their room? If I sit and wait refusing to move until they behave I will be too old to finish driving the rest of the trip.

7 kids shoved into a Ford Crown Vic, and someone found a hair :eek: and the battle was on...whose hair was it? When did it get there? Who was gonna or not gonna touch it? It was curly, OMG what if... EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWW...lather--rinse--repeat until Moogie completely loses her cool, slams on the brakes and puts the car in Park, in the middle of a back road! I got out and started screaming and yanking my hair and ya know those kids had the nerve to look at me like I was the stupid one?? :eyebrow:


Crazy