Do you ever have a problem taking things personally? It's like a part of you knows that a person isn't attacking you, but you feel mad at them when they disagree with you. It's hard not to do, at least for me it is. The latest thing was when I tried to explain to someone why I liked a certain type of movie. And she just said, "I hate those kind." She's a nice person, and just giving her opinion, but I felt as if she didn't like me when she said that. It's just my mind giving me a false message.

Hey sybil! *waves*

:) i have this too lol!

i know deep down that just because someone disagree's with me doesnt mean they don't like me but i cant help but feel personally attacked and annoyed that they dont agree!

i think its because i make an emotional attachtment to things i like eg music, a movie a book and if someone disagree's with what i like i feel asif they are trying to make a big point that what im emotionally attached to is rubbish therefore im rubbish for liking it.

lol thats a completely negative way of thinking and after my initial reaction of taking it persoanlly i think over in my head how irrational that is and start to feel less threatend!

I think it must be our mind giving us a false message because as with ADD we think too much dont we so we look into things too deeply as a result we feel threatend when someone disagree's! you'v just got to try to correct yourself and think they dont like the music, not me!the music or movie isnt a direct attack to you!

i hope thats helped!
~Maz

You're not alone.

I could write tons about this, but I'm not going to bore you with my ideas on how this develops in the ADD mind. In a nutshell, ADDers tend to have issues with rejection. Rejecting my idea is easily misinterpreted as a rejection of me. The pain of that rejection triggers memories of every single rejection I have ever experienced. The feelings I feel are therefore was out of proportion to the situation.

I've been looking for work this summer and everytime I didn't get a job I felt it a far more personal level than I should have.

Isn't life with ADD fun... :)

David

Yup, I do it too. I do it if someone says, "Eww, why do you like THAT movie?"

I really flip out if someone says, "That isn't normal!" :eek:
It hits me right in the heart, wondering if I am a freak or something.
Chele

Challenge any sports fan about his/her support of their favorite team, and sit back and watch the powerful emotional reaction.

I think the only difference with your situation is that your emotional connection is with something artistic, instead of ... whatever that is that sports fans find enjoyable.

Oh...yeah!!!

I've always been like that too! People will say something that is not ment in a 'attacking' style and it is like my entire body freezes as well as my mind. The first thing that happens...my defenses go up and it feels like I'm going out on a war path!

I've really been trying not to go into defense mode when a situation presents itself. How on earth do you tear something down that has been in place all of your life? I get frustrated too many times in trying not to feel that way when people approach me with things. Then the negative thoughts start rolling. It is kinda like when something good happens there is always something bad that happens right after it.

I sometimes wonder if banging my head on the wall might help! :D I think it would be more fun if I had company! ;)

well this just happened to me... AGAIN! I am far too sensitive sometimes. And even constructive criticism can give me PTSD flashbacks, and I get so bent I can barely function the rest of the day. Not bent angry either. Just hurt, and it makes no sense, because often times no one is even trying to be mean! ACK!

I know the feeling. Sometimes I just THINK someone is thinking negative thoughts about me and I get all flustered, can't let it go. Which is funny, what is it Dr. Phil says, stop worrying about what other people are thinking about you because, they probably rarely do? It's kinda true, I think most people think about themselves most of the time.

I have PTSD also, and, I think 95% of the time that I freak out, I am really reliving the past or being scared that the past will re-occur. EEK!!!:faint:

It's like a part of you knows that a person isn't attacking you, but you feel mad at them when they disagree with you.

I was more easily thrown out of kilter by some ones disagreement when I was younger than I am now. However even at my “tender age” of 40ish I still can get pretty steamed over silly stuff.

I think some of my mellowing is due to age and some is due to treating my ADD for the past 13+ years. Treating my ADD has also allowed me to learn how to use my emotions to control my emotions, by seeing my emotions as energy that can be harnessed.

I think the person below has an excellent explanation with which I agree.


i think its because i make an emotional attachtment to things i like eg music, a movie a book and if someone disagree's with what i like i feel as if they are trying to make a big point that what im emotionally attached to is rubbish therefore im rubbish for liking it.

I can see where this could produce emotional reactions in ADDers.

Although this is a support site people still disagree with each other. I find the same phenomenon here as I do in debates. Two members will disagree on one thread and then be in agreement on another thread.

Diversity in opinions is some thing that happens both here and in real life. Any time you have a large group of people from various walks of life and back grounds opinion differences are going to happen. Learning to deal with opposing perspectives in a healthy way here has helped me learn how to deal with them in my non-virtual world.



I've been looking for work this summer and everytime I didn't get a job I felt it a far more personal level than I should have.

I think this is the rejection thing as already mentioned. It is my opinion that unlike a opposing opinion about taste in movies or music when it comes to job hunting some one is denying you some thing you feel you need (money). It is much harder for me to deal with this kind of “rejection” feeling than with diversities in entertainment preferences simply because having a job is some thing that directly effects my survival.

You are correct in that the decision to hire some one else is not necessarily personal. It could be that some one who was more qualified or experienced came along and applied for the same job.

However I agree, it certainly can feel personal. It can be my personal favorite excuse for procrastination especially if I already have a job and simply want to find some thing more suitable or enjoyable.