necromancer
01-16-07, 01:37 PM
i just started taking short-release adderall last week. it makes me a lot calmer and i can get so much done when i'm alone. however, i'm having problems taking it at work.
there's a lot of general distraction in my office - i work in sort of a central area and it's CONSTANT talking, a staff bathroom nearby, etc. when i'm not on medication i am amiable and just sort of embrace all distraction and talk to anyone who talks to me, even though it's a little frustrating. my job is slightly different and more technical than that of the people around me, and i honestly need to be able to think. last night i was alone at the office because it was a holiday and managed, with the meds, to accomplish about what i'd normally do in a week (without meds i'd have been distracted and unmotivated anyway). my question is: i have zero ability to filter background noise on a normal basis. on the meds i'm a little more detached from people and less interested in standard office chitchat, and feel almost as if i'm honing in on all this outside distraction more. and it's like i feel this amplified sense of irritation - i start grinding my teeth and am not aware of feeling calm again until i can get some time to myself. i just bailed for lunch after 2 hours to sort of re-center myself. i'm considering just being a dork and wearing earplugs, which looks highly antisocial but might work.
what i'm wondering is, barring a change in environment, whether i should even bother taking the adderall at work...if i'm sort of actively prevented from focusing on anything, it just seems like it's going to be a source of increased anxiety more than anything else. i may ask for a few hours a day when i can work in an isolated room, i dunno. just wondered if anyone had thoughts on this. i read one post where someone commented that being on the meds made it easier for them to filter out all the background noise, and i feel like with me i've noticed it's doing the exact opposite. i've noticed that on adderall if i let a specific thought take over, i tend to get rather obsessive about it unless i consciously shift focus..i suppose that's what i'm doing here. any thoughts? think about "office space" and that "corporate accounts payable" lady who sat next to peter's cubicle...one would still want to shoot her one way or the other, but is perhaps more likely to do so on amphetamines.
sorry for the length of this, just venting.
-nicole
there's a lot of general distraction in my office - i work in sort of a central area and it's CONSTANT talking, a staff bathroom nearby, etc. when i'm not on medication i am amiable and just sort of embrace all distraction and talk to anyone who talks to me, even though it's a little frustrating. my job is slightly different and more technical than that of the people around me, and i honestly need to be able to think. last night i was alone at the office because it was a holiday and managed, with the meds, to accomplish about what i'd normally do in a week (without meds i'd have been distracted and unmotivated anyway). my question is: i have zero ability to filter background noise on a normal basis. on the meds i'm a little more detached from people and less interested in standard office chitchat, and feel almost as if i'm honing in on all this outside distraction more. and it's like i feel this amplified sense of irritation - i start grinding my teeth and am not aware of feeling calm again until i can get some time to myself. i just bailed for lunch after 2 hours to sort of re-center myself. i'm considering just being a dork and wearing earplugs, which looks highly antisocial but might work.
what i'm wondering is, barring a change in environment, whether i should even bother taking the adderall at work...if i'm sort of actively prevented from focusing on anything, it just seems like it's going to be a source of increased anxiety more than anything else. i may ask for a few hours a day when i can work in an isolated room, i dunno. just wondered if anyone had thoughts on this. i read one post where someone commented that being on the meds made it easier for them to filter out all the background noise, and i feel like with me i've noticed it's doing the exact opposite. i've noticed that on adderall if i let a specific thought take over, i tend to get rather obsessive about it unless i consciously shift focus..i suppose that's what i'm doing here. any thoughts? think about "office space" and that "corporate accounts payable" lady who sat next to peter's cubicle...one would still want to shoot her one way or the other, but is perhaps more likely to do so on amphetamines.
sorry for the length of this, just venting.
-nicole