Everytime I try to talk to her about the possability of me having ADD, she fires back with a compelling argument that the drug companies created ADD in order to medicate people. And how when she was younger, if kids didnt work or pay attention they just got the crap beat out of them. Thinking about it though, has ADD really been around forever? And by beating the kids back in there time, did that infact condition any ADD people to concentrate despite having the disorder. I don't know, my parents are always droning on about how when parents could beat there kids without worrying about child services, that kids behaved much better and everything wasnt blamed on a disorder. Ehhh I dont know what believe anymore, I sometimes wonder if I was hit if I would have turned out better. Anyones thoughts on hitting there kids?

First off, welcome to the forum! The topic of corpral punishment of children is pretty hot these days. Personally, I think that a spanking (within reason) is ok, but as for whipping, switch, etc. I dont agree. And when it comes to dealing with an ADD child, I think imposing corpral punishment is just going to give the poor child even more emotional baggage to carry through their life. How old are you? Are you able to seek treatment on your own?

<Nervious "HEhE">

Umm...Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa......


Take it from me,

Beating, doesn't work.
Neither does, yelling, screaming, threatining, or totally ingoreing...
If anything, the stress just makes me "zone out" more, alltough it does provoke me to find new and interesting ways to cheat....

Well, I can see how beating your kid could release some dopamine... :rolleyes:

I know how it is when the people in your life refuse to take ADD seriously.

Take a look at this thread: http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=36986

Spanking is almost a debate topic but it is a legit ADD topic if we keep it to how well it treats ADD.

Okay now I get to practice my Scuro act. . . haven't done this one is a while.

Spanking children for every little problems teaches children that physical violence and intimidation is the way to solve all conflicts, difficulties and struggles. To display how well this method works we can take a look at prison systems and the success rate of old fashion corporal punishment is for treating ADD type symptoms.

medscape (http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/517583_2)

Dr. Spencer went on to acknowledge that the actual incidence of ADHD in the prison population is quite high and referred to a study from 1994 by Eyestone and Howell, which noted that the incidence is 25%—more than 5 times the estimated prevalence in the general population.[10] "This is an enormous percentage of the population," he lamented.***End Quote

This is a partial discussion about untreated adult ADD.

I was spanked every Sunday because I wiggled in church although I did not end up in prison I did end up hating church. . . . parents who just want to hit children instead of work with them are taking the easy way out (IMHO). It is so much easier to simply strike a child then to sit down and try to figure out ways to solve the problem. If any one is being lazy it is a parent that resorts to this every time they have a problem with their child. . . . it truly benefits all to exercise the brain some times instead of the belt.

Child at 20 after being hit for so long for being who they are leave little doubt why some become violent them selves? Not only does the use of physical violence teach violence is okay for problem solving it robs the child an opportunity to learn how to productively solve problems.

Due to the prevalence of this "all a kid need is a good a55 beating" attitude that was very common until recently many of the cause of some of the things we currently blame on ADD, when indeed these problems may not even stem from the ADD itself but how the person was treated due to the symptoms. Relying solely on corporal punishment as a mean of directions would not only impact how a person learned to deal with anger, but how they learned to relate to problems, others, authority, frustrations, . . . .how is this for a decent counter.

I am not for or against spanking as this is not private debates but as far as corporal punishment being used to treat ADD symptoms it is worse than nothing at all. All children do require structure and discipline how ever striking should not be the only method of discipline with any child ADD or not.

First off, welcome to the forum! The topic of corpral punishment of children is pretty hot these days. Personally, I think that a spanking (within reason) is ok, but as for whipping, switch, etc. I dont agree. And when it comes to dealing with an ADD child, I think imposing corpral punishment is just going to give the poor child even more emotional baggage to carry through their life. How old are you? Are you able to seek treatment on your own?I'm 19, and I'm not really able to seek treatment because I'm broke and have yet to be hired anywhere. (when they tell you that they will call you by the end of the week, you didn't get hired). And I'm not blaming my not having a job on the ADD, it simply is too difficult for me to get one. It's pretty much my fault I don't have a job, I'm just not motivated to get a job because I see all my friends and family working long and hard and getting almost nothing for sucking there entire life away working. It just makes me depressed when I think about having to work for the next 40 or 50 years. Unlike other people, I have never gotten any sense of euphoria from working, and it just makes me tired and aggravated. I explained to a therapist once that it felt like I was trapped in a bubble, with no way to escape. Anyway, enough of my droning on...

Work is rarely going to cause euphoria.
Well, if I drink too much caffiene I get a high, but that's about it Xeon.
It's rare for someone to find a job they like, in a field that interests them, which is why we have hobbies.
Some people are gifted enough to turn their hobby into a money making deal
(writing, painting, auto design, etc).
At 19, I wanted to stay home all day, play video games, and listen to hairbands. (they were going out at that time)
I did my time at work, and then thought nothing more of it, as I enjoyed life.
I'm an unmedicated ADDer.
Now I'm in management, and I'm hopefully about to move up again.
More management, less euphoria (I can guarantee that), but more money.
I can further my hobby (my 1929 Essex Streetrod) by putting up with BS every week.
Who knows what they want to do at your age?
I sure didn't, which is why I hired on with a place that was diverse, where I could move around if I didn't like what I was doing at the time.
Look at gov't jobs, Home Depot, or anything else to get your foot in the door.
Get a degree with your money (some states pay for classes if you have ADD, etc), and move up in the company.
You can do this....
Now I gotta go to work.
Really. LOL

Perhaps the problem is depression related.

Not every one gets euphoria about working how ever it is necessary to pay bills provide a roof over my head. . . I get tired of working however other people would get tired of supporting me = I have to do what I do not want to so I can be free to do those things I do. Your example is seeking treatment By allowing employeers to suck away about 40 hours of my life per week I can afford to see a doctor. Catch -22 I am aware however if I knew how to change it I would have done so long before now believe me.

Everytime I try to talk to her about the possability of me having ADD, she fires back with a compelling argument that the drug companies created ADD in order to medicate people. And how when she was younger, if kids didnt work or pay attention they just got the crap beat out of them. Thinking about it though, has ADD really been around forever? And by beating the kids back in there time, did that infact condition any ADD people to concentrate despite having the disorder. I don't know, my parents are always droning on about how when parents could beat there kids without worrying about child services, that kids behaved much better and everything wasnt blamed on a disorder. Ehhh I dont know what believe anymore, I sometimes wonder if I was hit if I would have turned out better. Anyones thoughts on hitting there kids?I honestly believe if my Mum wasn't so strict...and I was so scared of her, I would have been so much worse with the ADHD..etc..I am not condoning it, in fact it totally ruined any relationship we had, but it kept me out of a LOT of trouble I probably would have gotten into..
It DID NOT in any way HELP with attention, learning, concentration, but it helped with impulsive stuff..as I was sooo scared of my Mum I often managed to stop myself..:eek: ..

I got good a *zoning* out during lectures and slaps :D

No doubt about I am lazy. I know it everyone else does. They still make do things to my utter dismay. But Dead Wieght on Velveteen I must do it. I do belive you should read that thread saying that Scientific proof that AD/HD exsists.

I do belive you should read that thread saying that Scientific proof that AD/HD exsists.

Good idea, link to thread below.


No scientific basis" - Here's the Proof (http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=16810)

She is very wrong and being very ignorant - no offense

Gstien, you're tooo funny. "Euphoria" is a genius word to ply, there.

Yeah, it took me a while to come to terms with doing what one must. Longer than I care to admit. It comes down to, suck it up and do it. And still, once you've sucked it up and say, learneda job, and do it to keep a roof overhead, and meet this baseline of responsible adulthood; there is so much more we can be, that ADD holds us back from until we learn to direct it, harness it, keep it at bay... whatever applies. I mean, some of us have ADD and other issues much worse than the majority and I don't mean they're irresponsible if they're not doing as well as I am. I mean, as mature adults, we're each doing the best we can, whatever our own best is.

Kiddo, find a thing you like to do. If you don't like to do anything, find a thing to do and start doing it. Do it fora while and then reevaluate. I mean, take up a musical instrument. Join a service organization. Get a certificate to work as a CNA and do that job for a while; it's very worthy work, and hard, and will give you a sense of work ethic and humility and help you see just how hard people have to apply themselves to stay alive and keep their families alive.

It's true both ways. ADD does exist. It gets in the way. Also, being a lazy, self-indulgent, unseasoned adolescent exists, and THAT part you need to suck up and overcome. Maybe you can give your Mom a bone, and grit your teeth and dig in in some way that she can see and appreciate, and meanwhile show her some research regarding ADD.

There's an online questionairre, you can do that, as a starting point. Does someone have the link? I'll try to get back to you with it, but maybe someone has it handy.

your mom is just as annoying as mine...........she still believes its all bull despite my suffering...........she smacked me a lot and it worked for me to get all A's........when i grew big and more responsible for myself at 13-14 she stopped and that is when all my grades plummeted to c's and d's my senior year..........im 17 now a normal person after years and years of suffering and feeling weird.....im glad i decided to do a search on ADD and realize that inattentive ADD exists and that I have a very severe version of it.......it really stopped me from my acedemic potential.....especially classes that i like such as calculus and economics........hopefully medication is just like it is advertised here to be and it will treat my ADD......and my mom will start to respect my decision and will see improvement as proof that I have this disease.........oh man........how much emotional pain i suffered from my mom........you are going to be this....you are lazy.....you are disorganized....you don't listen......where is your head (even though i am smarter then her)....then she will share embarrasing stories and share my what she calls "laziness" to her friends.....and i had to listen to that and answer with college is not the answer for big money.......business is........even though i attempt to not be all those things........with ADD mental and consequential physical exhuastion and misconcentration it is impossible to be organized, remember things, do HW, pay attention in class.............nobody knows this but us....its painful....it sucks.......but what can we do about it.......just get treated........be happy that we have unique creativity and that in reality, we have a stronger heart and stronger will then everybody else because of the suffering we went through

.... if kids didnt work or pay attention they just got the crap beat out of them. ...

Where's the implication in this sentence that beating is effective? I suppose that it theoretically could have an effect, though. If one causes another enough anxiety, it might have an effect on some ADHD symptoms. However, this still would not imply that the problem is one having a beating deficiency. All humans are chemically wired to be more alert when under stress. Not always necessarily more focused, but more alert, generally. Though I don't think such would have an extreme impact, it might give a small boost for all I know.

Irrespective... it is not the appropriate treatment. It is not healthy, neither physiologically nor psychologically.

Irrespective... it is not the appropriate treatment. It is not healthy, neither physiologically nor psychologically.
Totally agree, personally.

She's got other things to sort out with her own head if she thinks that way.

Its just like a grandmother saying " BACK IN OUR DAY, WE COULDN'T AFFORD A CAR"

yeah big whup

back then it was more fun......................there was always people and social gatherings.........education was not important...................that is what we where missing....the interactivity and the numerous amounts of people all the time.....we are not good at making friends on the go

ADD and/or Executive Dysfunction used to be called MBD ('minimal brain dysfunction') in the 1960s.

Hippocrates even described it back in 493 BC.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attention-deficit_hyperactivity_disorder#History

They've been observed and documented and treated for many years in the clinical literature by neurologists.

Your Mom's fighting science, there. :) Good luck to her. :)

Even a Poem dating back to the 1800s described boys who could not "sit still". (Was it in one of the Hallowell books?)


Story about "beating children into obeying":

You know what happens to those kids who get beaten for being 'poor performers', right?

They can't learn (or their learning problems worsen) and they become violent and anti-social (cruel). This perfectly describes one of my Uncles. (My Grandmother whipped him 'into shape' alright....)

---
N.B. When a parent thinks such a thing as ADD is VOLITIONAL (by choice; "choosing to be Lazy"), it gives the parent a sense of belief that there is a control over it. That might be easier than admitting that a child has an illness beyond the child's control, and that the parent is helpless to "make it better".

For example: Victims of sexual assault tend to blame themselves. Part of why this happens is b/c it is easier to blame oneself (gives hope for predicting/preventing it next time).... than to admit that one was overpowered and is vulnerable to others we trust in the world.

The term that gets used is "internal locus of control".

it depends if the child is actually cognitively able.....i was...........and not all add is "can't sit still"

Everytime I try to talk to her about the possability of me having ADD, she fires back with a compelling argument that the drug companies created ADD in order to medicate people. And how when she was younger, if kids didnt work or pay attention they just got the crap beat out of them. Thinking about it though, has ADD really been around forever? And by beating the kids back in there time, did that infact condition any ADD people to concentrate despite having the disorder. I don't know, my parents are always droning on about how when parents could beat there kids without worrying about child services, that kids behaved much better and everything wasnt blamed on a disorder. Ehhh I dont know what believe anymore, I sometimes wonder if I was hit if I would have turned out better. Anyones thoughts on hitting there kids?Add, has always been around the only difference is that they had names for adders, Lazy, Stupid, Degenerate. The idea that if something was not recognised earlier it did not exist is a sort of exercise in advanced retardation.
Essentially your mother loves and embraces ignorance.

Put it this way, Add is nothing more than a label, that classifies whats going on with you.
Most people are not in the least bit interested in understanding this and therefore talking to them about it is a waste of everyones time.
Accept the labels and move on, you're not going to change the mind of anyone who isnt already convinced.

Anyones thoughts on hitting there kids?

It doesn't do any thing for the attention span. Inattentive normally with draw even further often developing anxiety and depression and those with hyper components are more likely to become increasingly rebellious and violent them selves.

It doesn't do any thing for the attention span. Inattentive normally with draw even further often developing anxiety and depression and those with hyper components are more likely to become increasingly rebellious and violent them selves.

If anyone wants to know years of personal experience as evidence of this...just let me know.

I recall many times my father would line us up to beat our bare backs with a belt and tell us:

"You're just a bunchy of lazy kids who will never amount to anything."


Fortunately for him we repeatedly forgot about our plan to ...

Yeah beating never worked for me either. Neither did yelling.

Telling me to do something, then reminding me a few minutes later did work however

Ya violence, (and using weapons to threaten violence) never helped me in way either, and I would always say, "let go of me, and if you ever do this again I will call the police"

My experience is that spanking doesn't teach anything...especially with ADD or ADHD. My daughter, no matter what she was punished for, has forgetten exactly what she had done to begin with by the time the punishment is over!! So why make it physical?!

Hope your parents realize that this disorder has been around for a long time, and catching it early (instead of ignoring the symptoms or making excuses) could greatly improve a childs life!

Ya violence, (and using weapons to threaten violence) never helped me in way either, and I would always say, "let go of me, and if you ever do this again I will call the police"


Well Edward back in my day the police didn't care if your parent beat you with a belt, shoe, fist, electrical cord, coat hanger, leather strap, paddles, tree branches ect . . your parents could whip you until you had huge whelps and / or bruises because the police / teachers figured you probably deserved it This was a parents right to discipline what every way they choose plus it was considered a domestic problem not a police problem.

There was no such thing as CPS or any state or government agency that served to interfere. The police might question a parent if the beating got bad enough to warrant hospitalization. . . as in critical . . . . . criminal charges were rarely pressed. I have gone to school with visible bruises and had teacher make comments like "you must have been a bid girl this week end"

I had friends show up to school with black eyes given to them by drunk fathers. . . . that was the way it was for some. It wasn't real common but it wasn't unusual. It certainly was not was it considered a crime of any kind unless the beating hurt you really badly. At best you the child would have been sent off to a home elsewhere. Women were often as trapped in this abuse as their children. My mom was great she rarely resorted to physical punishments. When my step dad began drinking and becoming abusive mom tried to protect me she even had teeth knocked out I in turn tried to protect her, we worked together to survive. Back then most of us simply lived with what ever was dealt to us it until we were old enough to move out on our own.

I am gathering FightingBoredom is closer to my age than most of the rest who are responding.


I remember those days myself so the answer to the question would being hit have helped ADD. No I was still ADHD however I always believed my hyperactive ADD helped me survive the beatings

I was older{12} before I was exposed to this sort of parental violence had I been younger it may have effected my basic personality even more.

I remained pleasant and was not aggressive unless provoked, if I was provoked enough to feel threatened I became very aggressive in a dangerous sense with little or no warnings.

What did physical violence do for me and my ADHD . . . . I went from a pleasantly hyper 12 year old who wouldn't even stand up to bullies my own age, I never drank smoked or did drugs never planned to. At 14 year I would take on grown men without a second thought. . .and . . .I drank smoked and did drugs regularity . . . . . it took 2 years.


Perhaps the hitting idea for treating ADD isn't such a good thing after all.