Hi there


I'm on my mid-forties, I had not been lucky when it comes to relationships, it's not that I’m some repressed middle-aged who’s never been on a relationship before, don't get me wrong. In fact, I have been on a couple of healthy relationships in the past, but for some reason they never worked out.

For quite a while, after breaking up with my former girl, I know it sounds corny, but I started to lose faith in love because I really thought she was the one. So, as a way of relaxing and having a good time, this friend of mine advised me to take one of these tours to Russia. You know, they’re popular these days, because he said I’d meet beautiful women. At first, I gotta say, I had my doubts, but after thinking it over, I made up my mind. Therefore, with nothing to lose (except for a couple of bucks), I went on the tour, and indeed I met this dead- gorgeous, smart and sincere gal, we just simply clicked after meeting each other, we had the best time together while I was in Russia, and ever since I came back to the states we kept in touch almost every day by phone, chat, and e-mails.



I am very serious with her. We’re on a one-year relationship now. I know it's hard to have long distance relationship, but she’s definitely worth it, plus over the past year I went back to visit her on three occasions.

We have talked about her moving to the states and she’s ok with it. Lately, I have started to think about popping the question once she moves over, of course she doesn’t know about it.



But here are my concerns:



Do you think I am rushing things? Or should I just go for it and propose?

I know it‘s hard to say, but do you think it will work? You know, my being American and her being Russian? Or is it that you think she will have a hard time adapting to America and she’ll just feel like going back to Russia because of homesickness and stuff.


Any piece of advice would be very appreciated.



Thanks

Ask her to contact me. My new, incredible husband has ADD & so do I.

We have an amazing marriage. I think ADDers may have a more transcendent view of relationships.

Be careful!! she may be looking for a ticket to the US.

If she emails me I think I may be able to "read" her.

Worth a try.

bc

We can't be sure whether or not your relationship will work. Because one always runs the risk that things may not work when getting in a relationship. It's up to us if we make them work. Am I being a little pessimistic? but, look at the brightside the fact that she has waited for you all this time would mean that she really cares about you and loves you and that she's not just after a green card as some people may think or say. Nevertheless, I would recommend to wait a little longer to see how she deals with being away from home and after that time if things continue the same way you describe they are between the two of you now I would say....Go for it.
Good luck.

It's funny that I have come across with this thread 'cause few days ago I read this immigration report which I think it may be of the concern of the thread starter. It pretty much said that by marrying a foreign woman you have more than twice the change of staying married than if you marry a fellow American. By marrying an American woman you have a greater chance of getting divorced.

Now, i don't know about you man, but it seems to me the odds are on your side.

If you want to see the report, there you go buddy.

http://www.loveme.com/information/immigration.htm#Report (http://www.loveme.com/information/immigration.htm#Report)

Good luck!

If it's of any help, I am a Russian woman. I have been married to an American for more than 8 years. Also I associate with a group of about 100 Russian women that have married American men. So far I have only known of three divorces out of almost 100 couples. That is a far cry from my husband’s friends who are almost all divorced from American women.

re: rel'p success and wellbeing

We have to be happy with ourselves b4 we can do well in rel'ps, i have found.

Then we can judge what kind of rel'p, and partner, we want.

The most disastrous thing is to take any old rel'p that comes along.

Some Premarital Counselling Websites have good Tests to predict marital compatibility and success.

http://www.aamft.org/families/Consumer_Updates/Marriage_Preparation.asp


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Another Article:
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2004/06/22/earlyshow/living/main625453.shtml


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I sort of feel like Gene Simmons. I"m not getting married, but I'll never have to get divorced.

Is it just me, or does this whole thread look like spam? The people who post -- except the legit members of ADDF -- are all saying these great things about relationships started on a Russian holiday, and insisting that it will work with all of these dubious citations and statistics. And they all seem to be joining just to post messages here. I don't mean to be a jerk about it, but spammers really annoy me...

-g