Ok i am sick of it. I am so sick of it. What am i sick of? I am sick of people thinking that a person with add or any learning disability has to have a certain look to them or that they have to act a certain way. I mean tell me.what the hell does a person with LD or ADD supposed to look like or act like? let me give an example. my bio professor pulls me aside and asks me how come i am signed up with the disabilities department at my college i tell him, like i told him at the begining of the semester that have add with dyslexia. i found this strange his asking asking me a gain and i said to be polite why do you ask? he tells me that i donnot look like someone with any disabilty whatsoever. i then ask him what he thinks a person with a disability looks like and he then apologetically says he did not mean any offense but the other disabled students he has had in his class where not like me. when i ask him what he means by that he says the LD students he has had in his class where all over the place and they where not as at ease as i was. i shook my head because i could not believe i was hearing this nonsense and i tell him that i have a good support system and lots of help. (i did not tell him about my medication or that i was seeing a psychiatrist because i did not think it was none of his business) And then there is my psychiatrist. AND THIS IS MY PSYCHIATRIST THE PERSON WHO IS SUPPOSED TO BE HELPING ME MANAGE MY DISORDER! He tells me the same thing. that i donnot LOOK like someone with ADD or any other disability. Now can you believe this crap? i mean this person is supposed to be MY DOCTOR HE IS SUPPOSED TO KNOW BETTER! At his saying this i am begining to wondering if he got his ******* license to practice medicine from a ******* five cent bubblegum michine. I mean he is supposed to know that ADD ranges from mild to servere. i mean what the hell is going on? i am so sick of these ignorant people

Just to play devils advocate, if they are saying that they don't think you look like someone with a LD or ADHD, they might be talking about the actions that you take instead of how you look. They might be expecting some impairment/difficulty in social interactions, time management, etc.

If I'm missing the point, sorry about that. Trying to provide another perspective.

If you don't agree with the psychiatrist's behavior and/or attitude, find someone else. Find someone you're comfortable with, and provides you with a level of support and service that want. No reason to stay with someone who you feel is undermining you. Also, search google with the psychiatrist full name. I've done this and often pull up a State or City run licensing association, and can see if there is any negative reports, etc. Just a thought.

-- jolt

Oh that totally burns me up! The whole thing about disability having to "look" like something...

I think that people may have this "need" to attach a certain physical characteristics to certain behaviours so that..well.. they can avoid it or be prepared for it. I think it's a defense mechanism really.

It is tiring having to deal with ignorance on a daily basis. You're absolutely right, totally stupid and so uncalled for.

Hope the rest of your day went better.

Just to play devils advocate, if they are saying that they don't think you look like someone with a LD or ADHD, they might be talking about the actions that you take instead of how you look. They might be expecting some impairment/difficulty in social interactions, time management, etc.

If I'm missing the point, sorry about that. Trying to provide another perspective.

If you don't agree with the psychiatrist's behavior and/or attitude, find someone else. Find someone you're comfortable with, and provides you with a level of support and service that want. No reason to stay with someone who you feel is undermining you. Also, search google with the psychiatrist full name. I've done this and often pull up a State or City run licensing association, and can see if there is any negative reports, etc. Just a thought.

-- jolt
Thanks for your advice. I so need to get a new shrink but because of my health insurance i can't do any better right now. it so sucks because i get the feeling that my shrink has not seen that many add cases or he just ignorant. i would like a therapist that specializes in add but can't afford that right now. as for my teachers? i just keep calm because i know they for the most part are a bunch of idiots

If your psych doesn't inspire respect from you, that's gonna make it pretty hard for you to work with him. There should ideally be some feeling that he has something to offer.
He may have meant what he said in a benign way, but it's still kinda lame.

RRR...I have no great ideas..(typical) it's late, but I can feel your frustration...my immediate offer of advice was totally rediculous( tape your arms behind you back, and go in a wheelchair)..but, hell, that's plain rediculous...

I know how you feel..and I can feel your pain...I hope you get it sorted soon
xxx

I can understand the fustration of people thinking that you should be a certain way if you have a disability. And since I don't climb on roofs or throw major temper tamtrums like those you see on TV, then of course people react with a certain tone of suspicion when I tell them I have ADD.

While I would not wish any kind of physical disability on anyone (not even my worse enemy) there have been times when I have, because no one goes up to a blind person and asks "Hey, how come you can't read that sign in front of you", or to a person in a wheel chair, "Why aren't you running around that football like everyone else?" No, from my experience if you "look normal" there's nothing wrong with you, and when I do have any kind of ADD moment; well of course I'm just acting silly.

Consider situations like this as a learning opportunity. Exposure to different people with the same diagnosis teaches us the differences within the diagnosis. As someone has already said, someone who has developed good coping skills, a good support network and the right medication is going to "look" different than someone who has none of these. I don't mind people knowing I take medication; another opportunity to dispell the myths.

.....on the other hand, congratulations!!!! If you aren't sticking out like a sore thumb then you must be coping. And if you're coping, despite the AD(H)D, then you must be pretty darn capable, and the more intense your ADD, the more capable you must be. See what I mean? If you can sit through classes and act normal enough that the prof thinks maybe he's being scammed then you must be doing a whole lot right. So congratulations! (again).

I'm watching my daughter figure this out. ODD, blaming, flaming, taking hard classes, then not doing the homework, throwing stuff around. You only have to be about half clued in to see what's going on with her. But I can also see her begin to build coping strategies. With any luck, by the time she hits college she'll be able to fool 'em as well as you.

I can feel what you are saying, but I'm trying to offer a different spin. I'm past school, but it does bug me when my friends are dismissive of ADD or blow me off. ("well, doesn't everyone procrastinate sometime?" "we all have our off times" "isn't ADD one of those new psych-fads?" "have you tried meditating?") Sometimes I want to scream.....or cry. But eventually I can get back to being secretly proud of my ability to maintain, against all odds.

I'm not trying to placate........or offend. -u

so at 22 i was diagnosed with depression after struggling my whole life with not just severe depression but major LD and a massive temper. my doctor was way against meds so she had me do all this stuff before she would even think about medicating me (this is in norway). nothing worked so she put me on prozac. i hated this doctor because she wouldnt listen to anything i had to say. i siwtched and went to a new doctor. he is also against medicating, but he had the gull to say you dont look depressed, you dont look like someone who loses their temper... i wanted to kick him right there but i didnt. so i start going to a psychologist. finally someone who actually pays attention to me. turns out she specializes in AD/HD and has me takes some tests. she talks to my mom about my history (she has been convinced my whole life that I had ADD) and after a couple of weeks diagnoses me... will go to a psychiatrist tomorrow to get prescr. for ritalin. so next day after diagnoses i go to normal doctor. "oh my god, you definately dont have ADD!" he says. I have seen this doctor 3 times at this point. I ask him how he can tell that. "Because just like you dont look like you are depressed, and that you dont have a temper, you definately dont look like you have ADD" I got so ****ed just by that I started screaming at him that he doesnt look like a complete *******, but he is one. i threw the papers on his floor and kicked his computer and walked out. I was so ****ed off 2 days later still that when this complete stranger started being a complete dick to me in the grocery store i kick him and smacked him. I just got so sick of people completely denying how I feel just because I am a blonde hair blue eyed girl who knows how to fake a smile in public. This was all about a week ago and since then I dont seem to be able to calm down my temper. Its like I feel like I need to show at least all of Oslo that just because you seem someone who looks nice and sweet doesnt mean that you can get away with treating them like crap. I know this is a terrible thing to do and I am beginning to calm down, but I feel your pain and frustration when someone completely denies that you feel a certain way or experience the world in a certain way. its funny though because since i have been diagnosed and telling some people, all of my really close friends all say they arent surprised, but my friends who arent so close all say that they cant believe it... by the way, i have to find a new doctor again. my current one refuses to see me now.

Se DR's just don't see the ADD IMHO, because that's not their specialty.
They can assume you have it, and send you to someone that specializes in this field, for a proper diagnosis.
If they don't, then you don't know for sure.
Now you know, you have ADD.
It's not a bad world actually, and maybe medication will help you with your ADD.
Over time you may learn to live with it unmedicated.
If not, that's okay.
Cruise around this whole board, and you will find a huge network of people across the globe, that have learned to start dealing with their ADD, and go about their lives as best they can.
At least ADDers have figured out how to use the internet, or this board wouldn't exist.
Today the internet, tomorrow the world! LOL