View Full Version : Suggestions-advice, Reorganizing house-flooded basement etc-


VisualImagery
04-11-07, 05:59 PM
Last March our basement floooded and cause major damage. The area is finally liveable again- except for lots of boxes of things-mostly from moving 3 times in 2 years-I worked out of town. We have stuff in almost everyroom in the house in boxes still and other stuff in process.

My problem:

This is basically ALL on my shoulders to do
DH sabotages what I do get done by not helping maintain my hard work
There is so much, I truly don't know where to begin
Some of the stuff is my son's-he won't pack it up-#$%@$%$#
I am struggling to do this each day because of the above
I need to

Organize my studio spaces-to start some fine art and also prodution work
Get the rooms liveable-that is put the nice furniture in them and make them look pretty again-once they were.
Know how to get this done and not drag it out
Move some furniture to other rooms
I care and want to get this done, but the stuffing is just plain knocked out of me-All I see is lots of hard work that will not be respected and then sabotaged and ignored and it will all go back to crap-I can't make people care.

I really need a couple of people to help me physically. Maybe when I get through the boxes they could help me with the furniture and deep cleaning of the rooms. My family will not. No comments. I am thinking of hiring a couple of high school kids but it is such a mess-not all of it is mine-so much is DH's too. Ths yard looks terrible but I really cannot do that work anymore and quess who won't-it is trashy and I am sure the neighbors dislike it as much as I do. I need carpet torn out too-have asked DH to do for 10 years. So this is now my job.

Any ideas or a plan that could help me? Sewing stuff, papers, and some art stuff-not much, boxes from past apartments with old school stuff, my husbands tool mess he never has organized in 12 years at this house-OMG!

ADD is only part of the problem.
Thanks for any ideas. Oh, throwing out the husband is on the list. :D Gotta purge.

thewfh
04-11-07, 06:07 PM
Boy! That could be first on your list!!:p Can you schedule things to do in the basement? Maybe schedule one day just to deal with breaking things into piles. Stuff that goes to garbage, stuff to keep, give away. Then schedule another day to deal with each pile. Schedule one day to rip out carpet. Don't do it all in one week. If you want, post a spot here detailing your schedule and maybe your close buddies here can check and send encouraging updates to you!!

I just did the same thing for myself. I've got a test coming up and I need to prepare for it. So, I scheduled my day to make sure I get my studying done.

Hope my suggestions help. Keep your chin up w/ the Hubby. I posted a reply in another area and I hope your are doing well....

the WFH

VisualImagery
04-11-07, 09:13 PM
Thanks wfh-I read the other one.

I will do that. Tomorrow, get the guest room cleared of extras, company coming. Then vacuum it and arrange it all pretty with the nice stuff I have! Inherited. 2 green wicker chairs, treadle sewing machine bases for small desk, double bed, and tv on desk. Will be pretty. Have to wash the bedspread. It is my lavender and thyme room, calming and soothing for guests. Made the drapes a while back. Will check back and let you all know when it is done.

Friday-empty the boxes in dining room and put stuff away, only 3 of them. All my closets are crapped up-from my DH's shove and stuff technique. Auugghh.

Tonight, 1 box!

Thanks so much.

jeaniebug
04-12-07, 03:21 PM
Good luck with all those projects!

I find that when I am feeling overwhelmed by a big project, I have to make lists. I also have to write priorities next to each item. I use #1 for most urgent/important, and then #2 and #3. So everything on the list is a one, two or 3.

Then I rewrite the list with all the ones at the top, the two's next and the three's last.

It helps to be able to cross things off the list.

I have to re-do the list either daily or a couple time a week in a big project. For me it was moving from Houston to Portland, Oregon.

And do hire some high school kids or cleaning people if/when you need them. Ripping up a carpet is a good example of something high school boys would do well at. They can also be good at yardwork, but need direction and supervision.

Good luck, dear! Let us know how it goes!

Doing the guest room first, especially with guests coming, is a really good start. And having someone coming is the best motivator there is (for me, at least).

Not that I always listen to my own advice, you should see my house. My daughter brought home two kittens this summer, so now I have 3 cats. One of them doesn't like the dirtbox, :( so she has to go, but can't find the courage to take her to the shelter. Oy!! And I live in an apartment and already have a med-large dog as well. Things are gettin' hairy! :cool:

VisualImagery
04-12-07, 04:15 PM
My big thing with this project is my mindset-I have to take charge of getting this done and have to get past how I feel about the lack of support and help.

Working on it. Feeling better helps. Forgot I have to get my resume and application polished today. So no cleaning till tomorrow-music really helps loud and rock and roll! So I will turn up the stereo!

Lady Lark
04-12-07, 07:22 PM
I understand the lack of support. I am much more of a neat freak then my husband. Partly his ADD, partly his "artist" mindset. :rolleyes: I give myself some time to grumble and feel sorry for myself then I just stop. Usually my problem with a big project is just getting over hao HUGE it is.

Break things down into smaller section. Take a room, or a pile at a time. If it help, make a list (some people it doesn't since it makes it look like so much more then), cause sometimes it helps with that psycological boost to see things getting marked off. Do whatever organizing/cleaning style works for you. I hate those shows that say "this is how to do it, and that is that." I'm always looking at them thinking I would never organize that way cause it's stupid. :p

For me, I sort into piles:
"know it's trash"
"it might be trash"
"not trash, Goodwill!"
"keeping it"
and I get rid of the trash piles right away. It clears up more room to deal with what's left, and it looks like I got something done. :D

*hugs*
Good luck.

VisualImagery
04-14-07, 10:35 PM
Started on this project, just taking a day at a time now. Somehow it will all get done. Thanks for the encouragement LL!

meadd823
04-15-07, 02:49 AM
I would put my stuff up first . . .my hobby stuff so I can relax when I am feeling like pitching a fit. . . Gary I put his stuff into Gary piles which are areas that are out of sight. He puts his own crap up if he wants to be able to ever find it again {maybe} He does have the one place in the living room he picks it up when it gets to be too much or I will God only knows where I will put his stuff because five minutes after I do I will not remember. . . . Gary hates hide and seek so he does pretty good when asked {or threated by me volenteering to do it for him} I threaten with murder and mayhem people who mess up what I just cleaned up . . . ask my kids one is a member here. They were only fearful of me two times when they messed up what I just cleaned or when I paid bills.

VisualImagery
04-15-07, 09:45 PM
Well, they will now know the fear of dog when I get the closets organized again! They know what happens when mamma ain't happy. Ain't nobody happy-or getting anything. Hold no quarter! I do have to label things too. Yesterday I demonstrated how to fold bottom bed sheets.

I like the idea-Jack piles here, he couldn't find Jack in them either! I am doing my stuff first-absolutely. My loom is beckoning to be reassembled!

They-husband mostly-needs to be afwaid, vewy afwaid. The shove and stuff mentality will be verbotten-or he will die a slow painful death....... I will talk and never stop! :D He will go catatonic in 30 minutes.....

One box a day-if I can do that, it will not take too long that way-I hope! Feeling better helps too-I have been sick since January. Amazing what it is like to be healthy!

Thanks meadd...

Lady Lark
04-15-07, 11:37 PM
*ugh* I hate making Mark piles, it always leads to a mini fight. I finally asked him what he wanted me to do. I get yelled at if I nag him to put his stuff away. I get yeled at if I put it away myself. Well, if I'm going to get yelled at either way, I might as well have a clean house to show for it! He finally got the hint then, and he's doing much better. :)

EYEFORGOT
04-16-07, 02:29 AM
I agree with Tammy. You first. The only other thought that came to mind was telling your son (who is grown, yes?) that his stuff needs to get out of your way or you will find a place to put it. Either in your trash pile or your Goodwill pile. Is that too harsh? Just thought it might help with the feelings of lack of support. Mum's serious. Help out or she'll do what she needs to do to get'er done.

VisualImagery
04-16-07, 08:50 PM
EYE and all, I am putting son's "stuff" in boxes-plopping quickly-not organizing. As soon as he finishes school I will take all the boxes to him (he has no car) and say, Voila! We do have room to store boxes, but he has to minimize the # of them. I will not organize his stuff-I promise!

This is me first time-momma gotta be happy. Going through one box of MY stuff tonight!

Thanks for all the ideas and encouragement! We moms tend to put ourselves last-not healthy at all. My mom got into martyr mode-it was so unpleasant.

I think I will put signs in closets-put it back where it goes-or die! :D

Lady Lark
04-16-07, 09:19 PM
That may not work. I've noticed that death isn't much of a threat. Tell them put it back where it belongs or I stop cooking! That'll get their sttention. ;)

VisualImagery
04-16-07, 10:46 PM
I already stopped cooking-walked out one day because of constant criticism or telling me how to cook. I teach freakin foods and nutrition! I love to cook too, so that should tell you how frustrated and po'd I was and how worn down I was from years of that crapola. And withholding you know what? ha-non-existant. So, wtf is there? Talk DH into a stupor? :confused:

I just need to focus on me now-and make my 5 year plan. This cannot go on. This feels selfish, but I gave up so much for so long.... Not something any woman should do. Oh, honesty and discussing feelings and needs? If a woman speaks in a room full of men, does anyone hear? How many times? Let me count..... Mamma needs to be happy.

It isn't just a flooded basement and tons of work to do-they are just details in the big picture.

Enough for now-Thanks all for the support. Will keep ya'll posted. To tired to do a box tonight-two long days of driving and I am really tired.

Hugs