Hi,

I`m new here and also not english native speaking so have a little patience with me :) .
Few weeks ago I was helping a friend to do her paper for school. She choose "Children with ADHD" as a subject. So after few days googling and gathering informations about ADHD, she said to me: "Well I don`t need to writte any paper, I will just take you with me as an example."
Of course she ment it as a joke but after that I got obsessed with finding as much about ADHD as I could. I did few "test"on internet. In one of them there was said: More than 20 checked items on the self ADHD test indicates a strong tendency toward Attention Deficit Disorder or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.... I`ve got 46!
Also after reading many posts I start wondering if maybe I could have ADHD...
But there are some differences in my behaviour that are exact opposite to ADHD symptoms. And all of those opposites turns into an obsession for me....
For example I don`t have a hard time organizing task. In fact I`m an organizing freak. My whole day is "perfectly" organize. Things that suppose to be fun I turn into a time schedule. -13.30 - 15.00 - Shopping with friends.... 15.00 - 15.30 - Groceries. 16.00 - 17.30 - Cooking dinner...And don`t come anywhere near me when at 17.35 the dinner is not ready. I`m literally freaking out then.
I also have a very good memory. Never forget to show up at a meeting. And I`m extremly punctual. When I come late to an appointment it`s only because I couldn`t find my keys....
I always lose them :)
And there are few more I could name...
But in most of the ADHD symtoms I can see myself: Cannot sit still, always playing with something, talking a lot (or totally not at all), get easily distracted, reading 6 books at the same time (and never finish them), always trying to be the best and never feel good enough, I often wonder off with my mind, sort of daydreaming.... I`ve been drinking a lot since my teenage years... After being drunk it seems that the thoughts in my head spin much slower. I also have poor communication skills when it comes to important topics. Generally I talk a lot but hardly ever say something........
Ok just to make a long story short... I`ve been living with myself for 27 years.... Until now everything went quiet ok... I learned to live with the idea that I`m lazy loser who will never achief anything and will never be good in anything (so where is the point in trying).
Anyway my question is: Does any of "official ADHD`s" also this tendency turning the ADHD symtoms into opposite and make it an obsessive behaviour? Is it something that a person with adhd would/could do (because I read that ADHD has to do something with how the brain works and that would be in my opinion imposible to control or affect)?
If yes, maybe I still have a chance to find an explanation for my being this way. If not, that means I really am an lazy loser... But as I said I already learn to live with that.

Welcome Lucia :) My father accepts after my and my children's diagnoses that he is clearly the carrier of that highly heritable gene. He has never been formally diagnosed or treated (yet, but he has not ruled it out either) and I observed him as well as I was able to my whole life and have to agree...the guy is loaded with ADHD.

He is also very concerned with time schedules, and lists. I mean this man has every last detail of his life listed on a spreadsheet!

I believe that for some ADDers the desire to maintain some control in a situation that is baffling results in some very rigid behavior. When you have spent your life paying for the crime of being late, sometimes you become overly concerned with being on time. That does not help the rest of the symptoms but apparently eases some of the stress of living with untreated ADHD.

I can be that way about some seemingly very little and trivial things myself. I have developed a little system over the years that prevents me from losing every last remote for the TV in the house, and I get very cranky when anybody messes with that system. I don't think that's because I don't have ADHD (I do and its severe, believe it!) I think its because I am just sick to death of never having a remote control! I have lost so many its not even funny anymore.

People seem to vary in what will eventually bug them enough to make a point of remembering or becoming rigid about. I know several people here (and they know who they are!) who collect used cups :D and will have several cups going at one time. I could never allow myself to do that, not because I don't forget where I put the stupid cup anymore, but because I am sick and tired of washing 40 cups! I hate washing dishes a lot more than I hate searching for and rinsing out the same cup all day long. To others, the cup collection is a standard part of life.

This is one of the test I did:
http://www.add-adhd-help-center.com/adhd_test.htm
From all the thing listed I could recognize myself in this points:

- Does not work to potential in school, receives "not working to potential" teacher comments.
- Has short attention span unless very interested in a particular subject
- Is easily distracted
- Lacks attention to detail
- Has sloppy handwriting
- Has difficulty putting thoughts on paper
- Frequently forgets or misplaces things
- Skips around while reading
- Is restless or in constant motion, is always "on the go''
- Concentrates better when moving or fidgeting
- Has trouble sitting still or sitting in one place too long
- Has poor communication skills
- Lacks tact, often spurting out the first thing that comes to mind.(learnd to control it)
- Is easily bored
- Says things without thinking and later regrets having said them (leared to control it, I rather say nothing at all)
- Starts to answer questions before the questions are fully asked
- Makes careless mistakes in schoolwork
- Lies or steals on impulse
- Has trouble getting started
- Starts projects but does not finish them
- Fails to finish schoolwork or chores
- Is inconsistent with school performance
- Spends excessive time on homework
- Has a tendency to drift away.
- Has problems with self-esteem.
- Has trouble maintaining friendships.
- Acts immature for age.
- Has trouble expressing thoughts and feelings
- Avoids group activities or organized sports.
- Has a quick temper, is "short-fused." (it`s nto a rule, depends on a mood)
- Gets upset by minor annoyances. (not a rule, depends on a mood)
- Is argumentative.
- Worries needlessly or excessively. (only in my head, don`t let anyone notice)
- Has tendency toward obsessive behavior.
- Turns words around in conversations.
- Performs poorly under pressure. (or at least I think I do)
- Has difficulty reading unless very interested in the subject.
- Has difficulty falling asleep.
- Has difficulty waking up or feeling fully awake.
- Is frequently tired.
- Is more comfortable moving than sitting still.
- Become upset easily, is "thin-skinned."
- Talks excessively (it become less in last few years, maybe because I speak 3 different languages in my daily life)
- Fidgets, even when sitting quietly
- Has difficulty waiting in turn during group activities
- Frequently daydreams or "spaces out'
- "Blanks out" when taking tests or under pressure
- Is verbally or physically abusive (I don`t do it in real, keep it inside my head...)
- Is impatient (also something I try to hide)
Until few weeks ago I didn`t even though of having ADHD. I was always active person, as a kid I did lot of sport (I spent sometimes 25h a week in a gym). I have a good education, never had problems with parents, teachers, authorities... I`m not depressive or have much of a mood swinging. I tend to think negatively but I learned to live with it.... I would say in general I`m doing a good job to live a normal life. I think if you would ask someone to describe me they would say I`m a happy and positive person. Luckily they do not see inside my head :) ....
Also I`m from a country (I come from Slovakia) where going to a "shrink" is something we don`t do! So if someone has ADHD and was never treated, is there is a chance that it will get worse? I mean I have the idea that some symtoms got less itnensive in the last few years and others I kind of learn to control, but I`m wondering if it`s not just a temporary solution. Well to be honest I didn`t learn to control it, I just learn to hide it from outside world. Just keep it all inside.... So do you think if someone has a suspicion of having ADHD but in general his life is not one big tragedy is there a point to let it diagnoze? What will change then? I mean I`m sure if I would be diagnoze I wouldn`t need to take medication to keep it under control. I`m not such a big mess... So what else is there to it? After you being diagnoze were you more organize, less messy, less negative, got more self esteem, stop trying to be best at everything, stop feeling like a biggest loser of this world, keep finishing things you started? I KNOW in a rational world I cannot be the best in everyhting and if I`m not good in something that doesn`t automaticaly makes me a big loser but it`s not what my subconscious tells me, how I FEEL.
So I`m doubting if I should do something about it or it`s not really necessary since I can function on relatively "normal" level? What would change if I do?

Lucia, your English is excellent.

As you learn more about ADHD, you will discover that a person's coping skills may mask their ADHD. Some people with ADHD struggle with their piles of stuff and drive everyone crazy, while others are obsessive compulsive about organization and drive everyone crazy.

One more question about diagnosis... I know that you have to go to a specialist to do the test. And from what I read to diagnose corectly the doctor need to know your past.
But as I wrote previously, where I come from people are still very closed when it comes to a mental problem. We go to a doctor only when there in something wrong fysicaly. Not mentaly. So when I was last talking to my mother like you know there maybe something "wrong" with me, she just laugh and said you`ll grow out of it, like I did.... I cannot imagine talking to my old teacher and asked them what they think about it...Those kind of issues/topics are still out of question in my country (maybe not the whole country, but definitely in the part where gew up).
So is it possible for a doctor to diagnose an adult without knowing his/her past/history?

Lucia, you know your past history and the doctor will ask you lots of questions. The important thing is to find an expert who really knows about ADHD.

I discovered my ADHD while researching for a friend. I remember thinking, but this is "normal", when are you going to start talking about ADHD.

Well there is a problem with that... Because I don`t know... I just don`t remember how I was at school. I know I was an active child and I liked to talk a lot and fast, but that`s about it.... I have no idea if I had problems with concentration, how I was managing my homeworks, how I acted in class.... I just cannot remember.... I know I had quiet hard time getting through the secondary school, but there were also other issues I had... To be totally honest I`ve been drinking a lot for a long period of time... My teenage years+some years after that are like one big misty cloud. So I`m not the most reliable source of information....:(

ADDers usually have short term memory problems: losing keys, late, forget app'ts. (But we can have *steeltrap* LT memory, once info gets in there.)

However, maybe you do not lose keys or forget app'ts or show up late, b/c you have made adjustments for those things, using various coping strategies. (e.g. alarms, setting clocks early, calendars all over, TO DO list making.)

--------------------------------------

Several things are on that "LIST" of ADD/ADHD 'symptoms' -- that don't always apply to people with ADD. (Every sufferer is different!)

e.g. lying,
stealing,
always moving, hyperactive.

There ARE many subtypes (at least 3) of ADHD, so every person presents differently.
There likely are many more than 3 types. Dr. Daniel Amen says there are 6 types. I think there are more than that...

Also, you may have HYPERACTIVITY or restlessness , without it being "ADD" or "ADHD".

Hyperactivity -=ALONE=- is not diagnostic of ADD/ADHD.

Well actually hyperactivity was not really the reason for me to start paying attention to ADD/ADHD. What really interested me was the way the ADD/ADHDers think or how they see the world. I don`t know how to explain it... But many things in my life were out of line... I just accepted it with the idea it`s just the way it is... And after reading messagess of others I just couldn`t stop thinking about it.
Also now when you said that I might use some coping strategies I do realize that when someone ask me to do something I always try to do it immediately otherwise I will forget it. Or I just write it down not to forget it.
And with my work I don`t have tasks that must be usually finished on the same day. So if I forget to do things from the list it`s not a big deal, I just do it later.
That is also why I`m here. To find out more about it.. Not only from official articles but really talking to the people. Because the more I read about it the more pieces of my life starting to fit somehow.
So anyway... Maybe it`s just me trying to find an excuse for all the weak points of me...

Well there is a problem with that... Because I don`t know... I just don`t remember how I was at school. I know I was an active child and I liked to talk a lot and fast, but that`s about it.... Not everyone with ADHD is hyperactive and even if we are, girls may manifest the hyperactivity very differently than normally active young boys. Girls are often underdiagnosed. Do you or your parents have copies of your school records? I do and the teacher comments, brief though they are, tell the ADHD story loud and clear. I brought them to my first interview with a psychiatrist and the psychiatrist did not want to see them. He preferred to ask me questions for 90 minutes.

Lucia, ADHDers often self-medicate with drugs, sex, gambling, high-risk behaviours.

Ok I`m taking back what I said about never forget to show up on an appointment. I just got a bill from my orthodontist for not showing up on my last appointment :( . Last night it took me some time to fall asleep. And after doing a lot of thinking I realized that maybe my showing on appontments is not so great after all. But mostly it`s not such a big deal, so I don`t pay any attention to it. But once I start thinking about it, I`m realizing how many times it happend to me that I didn`t know exactly what day I am suppose to go to a doctor, so I just showed up whenever I wanted. And it was fine, because she`s my neighbour, so it was ok... And stuff like this. After finding this bill today, I looked for my appointment card and I found out, I forgot to make an appointment with the hospital... Then all over sudden I remembered that I still didn`t go to the agency that found us the aparment to sign some papers. I was supposed to do it a month ago.... And if I would think harded, I think I would come up with more examples in a last 2 or 3 months. But still if I go to an appointment I`m always on time!!!(ok +- 5 min.):)

ADDers usually have short term memory problems: losing keys, late, forget app'ts. (But we can have *steeltrap* LT memory, once info gets in there.)

However, maybe you do not lose keys or forget app'ts or show up late, b/c you have made adjustments for those things, using various coping strategies. (e.g. alarms, setting clocks early, calendars all over, TO DO list making.)

--------------------------------------

Several things are on that "LIST" of ADD/ADHD 'symptoms' -- that don't always apply to people with ADD. (Every sufferer is different!)

e.g. lying,
stealing,
always moving, hyperactive.

There ARE many subtypes (at least 3) of ADHD, so every person presents differently.
There likely are many more than 3 types. Dr. Daniel Amen says there are 6 types. I think there are more than that...

Also, you may have HYPERACTIVITY or restlessness , without it being "ADD" or "ADHD".

Hyperactivity -=ALONE=- is not diagnostic of ADD/ADHD.Ok I know that not everyone has the same symptoms... And for example stealing (I did it only as a child) wasn`t about the fact that I was getting somehting that I wanted but couldn`t afford, but it was more like going to a shop to buy some candies. And all oversudden you get the urge to do something dangerous (I know stealing is not very dangerous but as a kid I`d seen it differently)... Just for the kick... Now as an adult I found different things that gives me this kick...
Also with lying (that I still do but not so often as I used to)... Well I wouldn`t call it really lying. It`s more like bending the truth so you look better in the eyes of others.... I just read an post on this forum from a mother whose son is doing exactly the same....
But anyway as I said: I myself am not 100% convinced that I have something... But better safe than sorry...

Today for the first time I seriously talked about my still growing suspicion of having ADHD wiht somoeone (person that knows me I mean, not on an anonymus forum). I choose my brother since he`s always the one I turned to when something was bothering me.... The result wasn`t very promising. He told me if I would have ADHD I wouldn`t even finished the school. And that even if I would have it, I lived with it for 27 year and I didn`t suffer under the symptoms (don`t know if it`s a right way to say it. I mean that the symptoms didn`t messed up my life completely) , so why start doing something about it now. Well I have the tendency to believe everything he says and highly respect his opinion. And if he`s says something like this, I don`t think there is anyone else who will take me seriously. And maybe he`s just right and I should just droped it....

He told me if I would have ADHD I wouldn`t even finished the school. Lucia, read more of the forums and you will learn that this statement is not correct.

And that even if I would have it, I lived with it for 27 year and I didn`t suffer under the symptoms (don`t know if it`s a right way to say it. I mean that the symptoms didn`t messed up my life completely) Only you can answer this, but one of the hallmark symptoms of undiagnosed / untreated ADHD is underachievement. Have you been successful with things you have worked hard for? Has your brother spent a lot of time learning about ADHD?

Only you can answer this, but one of the hallmark symptoms of undiagnosed / untreated ADHD is underachievement. Have you been successful with things you have worked hard for? Has your brother spent a lot of time learning about ADHD?No not really... He did not... But it`s my brother we are talking about.... He was my only hope for emotional support....Anyway....
Few weeks ago a very nice guy broke up with me... It was something I took very hard. One of the things that went wrong was my lack of comunication skills... I mean a statue in the middle of a square was more talkative about the way it feels. At a certain point I decided to write some of my emotion down.... (not a big success) few days later (maybe weeks, I do not keep track of time) he broke up with me... Major blow.... I still am strugling to get used to be without him.... Well I wrote him few letters (he did not recieve all of them) but after comparing the things I wrote with the way most of the adhders feel/think. It`s just incredible simularities.... Well I never met a person with ADHD in real. So for me it`s difficult to compare the way I feel with the way most of you feel. I mean I alway though that dealing with ADHD it`s something incredibly hard. Like being in a different world. then I read the messages (written on this forum) about the most embarrasing things that an ADHDers did.... And I though is it all??? I mean things like this happens to me all the time, and I just though oh well **** happens.... Not something I should worry about....
Also I learned to cope with most of my emotions in a pretty good way. Always look at the bright side of life (even if I spent most of my evenings crying), do not be too hard on yourself (even if everytime I start doing something, I`m almost sure I`m not good enough to finish it). Losing things: I develped really strong back-tracking ability...so if I cannot find something I just stop for a while, think really hard when I used it last time and what I`ve been doing afterwards. And it works just great...
Being late: I start getting ready 1.5 hour before going out.... It takes me about 25 min to get ready... The rest of the time I`m spending with collecting the stuff I need, and remembering the things I should do before leaving.
Forgeting apointments : well I have 2 agendas (and still I forget to show up)
Forget doing things (short term memory`s not working properly): as I said I`m organizing freak. But I`m not sure how much of my action is really organizing and how much is just rembering what I`m still suppose to do. (OK I go shopping: Before steping into the bus I repeat all the thing I have to buy, then all the things I have to do once I`m back... Sitting in the bus:repeating all the things I have to buy+all the things I have to do once I`m back.... Being in the shop: slowly repeat all the things I have to buy+all the thing I have to do once I`m back. Ok I`m done with shopping... Repeating few more times the things I have to do once I`m back.... Is it really organizing or is it just a good way to "steal trap" the to do things into my memory???

Not everyone with ADHD is hyperactive and even if we are, girls may manifest the hyperactivity very differently than normally active young boys.
Yup, I have to agree. I believe the 'hyperactive' aspect of ADHD in girls is not so much physical (difficulty staying still) but more 'mental' if I can say. Things that I know a lot of people would find exhausting. For example, I can jump from topic to topic whenever I'm talking to someone. My friend pointed out this is one of the things she likes about me.
:D

Lucia as supportive as your brother is, I'm not really sure if his limited understanding of ADHD can really help you. I mean, the ability to finish school really isn't much of an indicator of ADHD. I managed to finish school too. Now ask me how hard I struggled throughout and how many times I failed classes, got poor grades.. Ask me about how hard it was to focus.. etc. etc.

As you said, he is there for the emotional support and trust me that's something that you cannot have enough of. If you eventually do get diganosed with ADHD, you'll need a good sounding board.

Some of the symptoms you've described certainly does sound like ADHD.

Lucia, check out www.chadd.org (http://www.chadd.org)

http://www.help4adhd.org/documents/WWK9s.pdf

here are a couple of links

Welcome to the forums Lucia.

ADHD is a disorder involving an inability to control attention. Some people who have ADHD also tend to be hyperactive, and a few ADDers experience hypersensitivity to one or more senses.

ADHD is very often acompanied by anxiety disorders ranging from a generalized anxiety disorder to disorders in the ocd spectrum. It varies a lot from one person to the next.

If you believe you have ADHD you might wish to consider going to a specialist for a proper evaluation. This might require a referral from your general practitioner, depending on the insurance you have.

Once you have gone to a specialist for evaluation and diagnosis, your next step might be to seek out a psychiatrist to treat your adhd.

Some people elect to forego a formal diagnosis and treatment and just go to their general practitioner for treatment. If this works for you, that is fine. My personal experience has been that a regular medical doctor can treat adhd adequately, but you get much better treatment if you go to someone who specializes in adhd...

Lastly, some people elect to not treat their adhd, and many people do manage to get by without medications. If you do opt for a non-medication approach to dealing with your adhd, I would recommend doing so under the care of a psychiatrist who specializes in attention disorders.

Good Luck
Me :D

Hi,

I`m new here and also not english native speaking so have a little patience with me :) .
Few weeks ago I was helping a friend to do her paper for school. She choose "Children with ADHD" as a subject. So after few days googling and gathering informations about ADHD, she said to me: "Well I don`t need to writte any paper, I will just take you with me as an example."
Of course she ment it as a joke but after that I got obsessed with finding as much about ADHD as I could. I did few "test"on internet. In one of them there was said: More than 20 checked items on the self ADHD test indicates a strong tendency toward Attention Deficit Disorder or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.... I`ve got 46!
Also after reading many posts I start wondering if maybe I could have ADHD...
But there are some differences in my behaviour that are exact opposite to ADHD symptoms. And all of those opposites turns into an obsession for me....
For example I don`t have a hard time organizing task. In fact I`m an organizing freak. My whole day is "perfectly" organize. Things that suppose to be fun I turn into a time schedule. -13.30 - 15.00 - Shopping with friends.... 15.00 - 15.30 - Groceries. 16.00 - 17.30 - Cooking dinner...And don`t come anywhere near me when at 17.35 the dinner is not ready. I`m literally freaking out then.
I also have a very good memory. Never forget to show up at a meeting. And I`m extremly punctual. When I come late to an appointment it`s only because I couldn`t find my keys....
I always lose them :)
And there are few more I could name...
But in most of the ADHD symtoms I can see myself: Cannot sit still, always playing with something, talking a lot (or totally not at all), get easily distracted, reading 6 books at the same time (and never finish them), always trying to be the best and never feel good enough, I often wonder off with my mind, sort of daydreaming.... I`ve been drinking a lot since my teenage years... After being drunk it seems that the thoughts in my head spin much slower. I also have poor communication skills when it comes to important topics. Generally I talk a lot but hardly ever say something........
Ok just to make a long story short... I`ve been living with myself for 27 years.... Until now everything went quiet ok... I learned to live with the idea that I`m lazy loser who will never achief anything and will never be good in anything (so where is the point in trying).
Anyway my question is: Does any of "official ADHD`s" also this tendency turning the ADHD symtoms into opposite and make it an obsessive behaviour? Is it something that a person with adhd would/could do (because I read that ADHD has to do something with how the brain works and that would be in my opinion imposible to control or affect)?
If yes, maybe I still have a chance to find an explanation for my being this way. If not, that means I really am an lazy loser... But as I said I already learn to live with that.

Also I learned to cope with most of my emotions in a pretty good way. Always look at the bright side of life (even if I spent most of my evenings crying), do not be too hard on yourself (even if everytime I start doing something, I`m almost sure I`m not good enough to finish it). Losing things: I develped really strong back-tracking ability...so if I cannot find something I just stop for a while, think really hard when I used it last time and what I`ve been doing afterwards. And it works just great...
Being late: I start getting ready 1.5 hour before going out.... It takes me about 25 min to get ready... The rest of the time I`m spending with collecting the stuff I need, and remembering the things I should do before leaving.
Forgeting apointments : well I have 2 agendas (and still I forget to show up)
Forget doing things (short term memory`s not working properly): as I said I`m organizing freak. But I`m not sure how much of my action is really organizing and how much is just rembering what I`m still suppose to do. (OK I go shopping: Before steping into the bus I repeat all the thing I have to buy, then all the things I have to do once I`m back... Sitting in the bus:repeating all the things I have to buy+all the things I have to do once I`m back.... Being in the shop: slowly repeat all the things I have to buy+all the thing I have to do once I`m back. Ok I`m done with shopping... Repeating few more times the things I have to do once I`m back.... Is it really organizing or is it just a good way to "steal trap" the to do things into my memory???How about writing down the things you need to remember. Keep a grocery list, a to-do list, an organizer. This will make things easier on your poor frazzled brain insteadof trying to remember it all in your head.

Looking on the bright side of life is very important. Find something pleasent to do in the evenings instead of crying. Make a list of all your assets and blessings and read it every morning and evening. What you focus on expands - If you focus on the good in your life more good will come to you and if you focus on all the things that are going wrong then more will go wrong.

Have you heard of The Law of Attraction? You attract to you what you think about most of the time. So be happy and think positive thoughts. And above all be grateful for all that you have. Gratitude opens the door to more abundance.

Has anyone heard of www.livingwithadd.com (http://www.livingwithadd.com)
This is Tara's site, she has a organiser for the computer.


Sometimes I think of writing what I need to do down but forget. This past semester, I made a list of the chapter and assignments I needed to accomplish and the due date. There are also Google gadets that may help. You would go to www.google.com (http://www.google.com) and download the individual gadets you perfer.