Maybe it is time for me to say good bye for a little while to the ADDFORUMS community.

I am replicating a familiar pattern... wanting and demanding what is perhaps obviously not appropriate to this setting.

My thanks go to all who have challenged me with their views of the world, ADHD and myself.

The concept of "Loyal opposition" is a valiant concept in my mind. It keeps company, in my mind, with all those just plain "loyal" roles.

It has been an honor to participate here, and I look forward to doing so again. I need to hit my reset button. Sometimes leaving is enough to do it. At other times it requires more. Time will tell.

Thanks too to all whom I have stressed. Ooops. It really wasn't the POINT, but when you're stressed, "why" really isn't the big kicker. So... a heart felt "sorry."

How log a break is this? Are you kidding? How would I know? Five minutes, five weeks? Five seconds? Other? I don't know.

Keep up the good work and play here.

See ya later, alligator.

David

Wheel, don't be gone for too long. We'll be missing you. And waiting for your return. Till then safe voyage.

Be good, wheel...and we'll look forward to your return, whenever that may be.

Cheers!

:( I be sad to se you go, but ya gotta do what ya got to do...in the short time I have known you..you are an awesome individual and i will miss you. Hope you come back soon and good luck in the mean time.

Well, to continue the tradition of not understanding many of your posts, I have no idea why you are leaving... your logic completely escapes me. :(

However, have a good time doing whatever you decide to do instead, and please be clear that I will never have any problem with you coming back.

Thanks and < smiles >

http://www.nzepc.auckland.ac.nz/authors/wedde/beauty.ptml

Have to admit I was waiting for an opportunity to reply (in Ed McMann voice), "You are correct, sir" or "Old hat, sir".
Just doesn't seem to fit here, though. Bon Chance.

Sorry to see you go! I did enjoy reading your ADD theory threads, but never felt I had a good enough analytical grasp on the questions you were asking to make an intelligent response. Hope your hiatus is a short one, but good luck whatever you decide to do.

Dude, ya do what ya gotta do. Know that your spot here remains open, waiting patiently (HA!!!) for you to fill it again! :D

smoo

I'm no good at this sort of thing so I'll just say "Later!" and hope you do come back. sniff, sniff:(

Leaving because you're not understood or agreed with isn't a solution... hope that's not what you're saying. Stand your ground, man! No one has to agree with you 100% for you to have a voice.

Do something else and get refreshed.
You're a good man.
We'll leave the porch lights on for you.

I know you know how I feel....:)

So I'll just say go in "peace" and go find what you're looking for...and if you're not sure what that is -- go find a way to find what you're looking for:)

Your brains and thought process and wisdom are gifts.......Hopefully the universe will find a way to use them...

Originally posted by joanrdtobe
...Hopefully the universe will find a way to use them...

Yep. Thanks. See ya later alligator...

I have apreciated all of your resposes to my posts.

Thanks, good luck.

I'm appreciating the break... staying out of other threads, and not starting new ones.

I don't understand things that have "formal" errors. I don't "tear apart" someones post to tear them apart, by proxy; I do so to understand their idea - communication, not "them."

Clearly, this is my limitation... others do not need to do this to understand. I do.

The people with whom I have had the most "disagreeable" interactions are also those who, when they have "endured" my explorations, have enlightened me. I like understanding others.

It also seems that it does not really matter if "I take responsibility" for the difficulty in communications or not. If I have difficulty and work it out the only way available to me, it offends others. Many have unworkable suggestions for how to change this. Many point to instances where they feel I have not been disagreeable. But even among external observers, assessments are not in perfect accord (nor would one expect them to be.)

This is a conundrum of sorts. I can ask for what I want, but I do not have a broad range of asking "methods" available from inside the situation. I seem to work with less information than others at the same point.

I seem to assume others are correct and I am in technical error. Why this is my starting point I don't know. Since I am more technically vulnerable than mostly anyone else this assumption proves false very frequently and tends to prove its self, in public, in uncomplimentary lights, and not in subtle ways... this is a social and political error. My error of assuming they have not made a formal error which has thrown me off, turns into very public expose of some small error or another of theirs... thus, some would say, I turn "my problems" around to be someone elses'."

The situation rapidly unravels as feelings become engaged and assumptions and inferences compound in error....

Others rightly accuse me then of needing them to accommodate me, if i am to understand. In teaching others, I find that most failure to understand requires that the communicator shift into the listeners frame, rather than the other way around, because if the listener COULD shift frames, they usually do so without prompting or delay.

Perhaps people thinking of me as intellectually capable, rather than more accurately, intellectually limited, sets inappropriate expectations for them too.

Once you've started off on the wrong foot nothing works like starting over again on the right foot.

I 'm 46 and none of this is really new to me. i've observed myself and others, and i given it a great deal of thought and discussed it with many.

to me it only makes sense to hold the idea that "you can learn to 'x' " for so long in the face of time and efforts. At some point resignation to the fact of a genuine disability seems appropriate. in the model of #1 task, #2 person and #3 environment (which includes other people) it seems if I(#2) am going to continue the task (#1) (communicating with others) that the environment(#3) is the remaining "free variable."

Obviously, this is politically incorrect. It violates the "therapeutic" premise... change the person, change what they can. direct focus away from the environment.

Curb cuts are an example that really works and violates all these same considerations... but, for some reason unknown to me, this analogous situation holds very little or no truck with others, broadly. Again, this even confuses me.

What is a self to do? <silly smile >

Check mate, eh?

Oh well....

Originally posted by Wheel1975
Perhaps people thinking of me as intellectually capable, rather than more accurately, intellectually limited, sets inappropriate expectations for them too.


My observation of you so far has told me that these are both equally true and false, Wheel, you should not "label" yourself intellectually limited without recognizing your commensurate strengths.

It seems to me you have an extremely powerful logical mind, perhaps to the point of OCD for logic, if you see what I mean. Unfortunately, although I consider myself to also have a very powerful mind, we have diametrically opposite ways of approaching life and the issues we decide to think about and address within it.

My decisions and beliefs are inspired more by an instinctive desire and sense of what I feel is right and wrong. I apply logic to it after the fact to try and justify it, and attempt to find out where I am wrong and why if that logic cannot be made to apply.

You, it seems to me, are more pure in your scientific approach to life. You start with the question and look for the answer. I start with the answer, and then look for the question.

I don't think this means we can't have reasonable, intelligent discourse and learn from each other.

It just means it will be hard and unpleasant sometimes.

I don't think you are to blame for this, either. At least not any more to blame for it than I am. Of course, I just feel that way, I won't bother trying to justify it logically unless you disagree with me. ;)

Hey Wheel, Hang in there and don't get too down on yourself. Read a good book that you enjoy.

You are the way you are and you seem to analyze things quite a bit....maybe you just need to take a break from analyzing so much...if you can. :)

Take care Dude,
James (a non-linear logic person, or as I like to think of it, scattered-shot logic)

< big grin > Ok. < big smile >

See ya later alligator...

Originally posted by jimmmaaa
Hey Wheel, Hang in there and don't get too down on yourself. Read a good book that you enjoy.

You are the way you are and you seem to analyze things quite a bit....maybe you just need to take a break from analyzing so much...if you can. :)


Yep, I am that way.
Nope, I don't think it is possible for me to be otherwise... so I'll drop the drive shaft for a while... < smile >

Take care Dude,
James (a non-linear logic person, or as I like to think of it, scattered-shot logic)

Hey!! I go to school for a few days and come back to read you're leaving the forums for an unknown amount of time???

What ever your reasons; I hope you're not gone for too long. For the short time that I have been reading these forums, I have always enjoyed and appreciated your posts a great deal. Take care!

:confused: :confused: :confused:

I am "driven as if by a motor."

So It will take an out of town trip, away from technological linking mechanisms to get me "off the board" completely for 72 hours.

Don't move, change the locks, and redecorate my "room" while i'm gone!

< smile >

I am bitter in specific, but not with anyone here... and bitterness is always, in my experience, an indication of error on the part of the one being bitter... I have never known an exception, and I do not expect that I am an exception in this case...

For those of you i have not embarrassed, chided, demeaned, invalidated, put down, offended or otherwise injured, I'm glad you have enjoyed my participation. For the rest, I'm sorry. It wasn't my intention, but i don't expect that to lessen the sting. i really am trying to observe "precursors" to that result and progressively intervene against myself progressively earlier. Thank you for being my Zen Masters.

Affection to all, -- david

Hey David, Did you enjoy your "break"? :p

I hope you find your way home soon for I enjoy reading your posts. I happen to find your thought's both educational and at times inspirational. And quite truthfully I admire your "moxie" the ability to think outside the box and ask the pertinant question's. It is something I am striving for in my everyday life as I tend to accept what other's tell me as the golden rule.

One last thought if we did not strive to understand those around us and the universe around us,,,would we still believe the world to be flat?

Hugs and hoping to see you soon,,,Cherity

I went to Memphis, TN with an EUCC church group (8 children, 7 adults) for Dr. Martin Luther King Day, 2004.

The context of the museum, ... , many things were quite moving.

I'm concerned that we are headed into a McCarthism... and our US led multinational corporations seem too willing to acquire land and inexpensive labor through real, honest, murder.

It puts all things in a humble perspective for me.

See you around here, some... Thanks all... David

http://www.mecca.org/~crights/

http://www.civilrightsmuseum.org/

http://www.civilrightsmuseum.org/

Sadly... none of this is news to me... :(

Thanks paul and cherity, and all.

i find i am still bitter about needing to do much of this "effort" at all.

In the National Civil Rights Museum was a fragment of a quote that expressed tiredness at have to work and strive and fight and wrestle for that which should have been granted at least when first simply asked for.

I find myself embittered. I don't like it. I don't like the implications. The implications correctly indict me. I don't know what to do about that.

Anger is a powerful emotion. Teen agers dwell in anger and feel and learn their strength and power. Effective as it may be, I don't want to spend my time there.

If I weren't ADHD I don't think I could beg layers of questions concurrently with multiple questions...

Not only do i struggle with which battles should be fought, and which won, (, all that i can be aware of, / there is a difference!) but i am called to beg the question of how to conduct such efforts, for effectiveness, and for my own mental and spiritual sanity. And is sanity or service the higher good? or is a hierarchy of "goods" simplistic and unworkable? Am i called to co-utilize all such things concurrently based on "judgment" rather than rules? And If my judgment is not reducible to rules, on what should it be based? Rules none the less?

How many concurrent contradictions am i able under which to run myself? Coherently? with integrity? to what?

David, I can't tell whether you are travelling, or at home, but it is good to hear from you.

You say, "i find i am still bitter about needing to do much of this "effort" at all....I find myself embittered. I don't like it. I don't like the implications. The implications correctly indict me. I don't know what to do about that."

Could you tell me whether it is these forums and threads you are referring to, or something in your "live" life that is causing you to find yourself embittered? It would be easier to respond if I knew in what sphere you are finding indictments and implications that you don't like.

Do you think it could be not just be nettlesome "words" that are the barriers?

i don't have time to answer your specific questions in detail right now. i will return.

But i can say that the hearts of men take time and hard experience as the teacher, and i am impatient with myself and others in the reality of this...

Big vocabulary not with standing, i find it very difficult to communicate in words. They are cumbersome and so much more that i do not admire. And yet, in the hands of a genius poet, like Dr. Martin Luther King, they speak the message of the soul of God himself. And still hearts stay hard and even those that turn are stiffer than one might expect.

Being bitter is clear evidence of "wrong headedness" in my experience, and I am guilty of it, as are others IMHO.