View Full Version : who thinks shrinks are a waste of money?


Guest1
07-08-07, 01:02 PM
the lady i went to recently did nothing for me your supposed to talk to her about everything it seems to me she got my money and never fixed me

speedo
07-08-07, 01:28 PM
Your psychiatrist will probably want to get to know you a little before she decides on a course of action.

If you have concerns that you are not getting good care you should mention it to her on your next visit.

I've been with the same doctor for over a year and I'm really pleased with the results thus far. At first, not a lot happend, but after a while my doc decided on improvements to my treatment. My doc did not do much other than take notes during the first 4 months of my visiting once a month. Most doctors won't change a thing until they have a really good reason because they don't like to take silly chances with people's health.

Me :D

QueensU_girl
07-08-07, 01:38 PM
It depends what the problem is, really.

The problem is that many of people's problems stem from:

(a) Childhood (emotionally, physically, socially, or cognitively impacted, if you will) or

(b) Embryology's interaction with the environment as we are forming neurologically in our mother's: and no Psychiatrist/Counsellor can (re)give us a happy childhood, or a new chance at developing in womb.

QueensU_girl
07-08-07, 01:43 PM
The big secret in mental health is that you have to learn to fix yourself. There is no Wizard behind the Curtain. Mental health people are only there to Guide you.

Sargon
07-09-07, 08:26 PM
The big secret in mental health is that you have to learn to fix yourself. There is no Wizard behind the Curtain. Mental health people are only there to Guide you.
This is true. Unfortunately, only the good ones guide you in the right direction, and there are many bad ones.

livinginchaos
07-09-07, 09:53 PM
mary,

Lots of problems can't just get fixed in a few sessions, it takes time. If you're uncomfortable w/ your therapist, look for a new one. It's well worth time and money if you're willing to work through the issues.

MissMadness
07-11-07, 12:29 AM
I have developed a great relationship with my therapist! He is a cool guy and I actually feel comfortable talking to him. I have been going to him for nearly a year. My psychiatrist though....he is different, a strange bird indeed. But he is the one who medicates me.

But back to my therapist.....and my therapy. (Yeah, most of my friends think I am crazy because I tell them I have to goto Therapy and they say didn't you just go...and I am like "no, that was my psychiatrist I saw yesterday." They are probably scared of me for having both! :p )

In regards to you stating that "she didn't fix you."

I don't look at therapy as "being fixed." I look at it as "guidance." Over coming where I have been, where I am at and where I am going. We all have issues....some more than others. Like the quote "Life is like a drawing...without an eraser." Goes hand in hand with we can't fix our past, but we can always take a different route next time!

And as far as not liking your therapist....find a new one. I had a friend who went through 4 before she found one she was able to talk to.

On another note......I feel like I need extra therapy everytime I get their bills because they make me go crazy! haha :D

livinginchaos
07-11-07, 01:48 AM
MissMadness said a key thing:
I don't look at therapy as "being fixed." I look at it as "guidance." Over coming where I have been, where I am at and where I am going. We all have issues....some more than others. Like the quote "Life is like a drawing...without an eraser." Goes hand in hand with we can't fix our past, but we can always take a different route next time! The therapist can't fix you. She/he can help guide you through your issues and help you think of solutions and ways to deal with things. You're the one who has to do the actual work. Therapy won't work unless you put forth effort.

QueensU_girl
07-12-07, 03:13 PM
The key to healing is often based in Self-Awareness of the mind, body and emotion.

#1:
I would suggest making a Mindmap diagram of your biggest problems.

#2:
And learning about the JOHARI Window, so you can ask others what your Blindspot Problems are (problems you can't see, but others CAN *glaringly* see.)

#3:
And learning to hear what your Body says to you.

EXAMPLE:
"Gee, my shoulders are sure tight after talking to that person.
"Interactions with him seem to really stress me/stress my body out...
"Better to learn to (a) avoid him, or (b) establish some verbalized boundaries, (c) or grounding techniques, or (d) learn skills to take back control in our encounters, so i can process things better and not get so overstressed."

QueensU_girl
07-12-07, 03:18 PM
Like, what are your Top 5 problems? (One sentence per problem)

mctavish23
07-14-07, 07:18 PM
LOL,

Great question.

Seriously though, there's an old saying that goes "Good therapist's are born, not educated (i.e., you can't learn common sense, instincts & empathy in a classroom)."

There's no question in my mind that's true.

When it comes to ADHD, my having it as badly as I do, gives me an advantage over non-ADHD clinicians that they'll never be able to obtain.

However, the price tag is very high, as it really takes a toll on my health in trying to keep up with the overwhelming amount of paperwork; which I can't do.

The other thing that really stands out as far as ADHD is concerned, is that NOBODY ( therapist's / clinician's ) READS ( the literature / research ).

That's my biggest concern.

tc
mctavish23
(Robert)

PrincessJenifoo
07-18-07, 11:44 AM
You definately have to be choosy about who you counsel with because this is someone you are trusting with one of your most important parts of yourself-- your heart. I give every counselor/psychiatrist/etc. a "trial" period of say, 6 weeks or so, during which I just try to tell them about myself and a little about my problems without going into great detail if I can. If at the end of 6 weeks I feel comfortable with them and I feel they'll help me, then I open up to them a little more.

I have been going to counselors, etc. since I was 5 years old and I have to admit I have made some progress, but not the amount I was hoping to get. Most counselors I've had have been supportive and kind, but some were not and others were... well... just plain wierd :confused: My last counselor told me at our last meeting that that day was going to be our last session because she was stepping back from counseling at the time. Gee, thanks for giving me so much advanced warning so I could make other plans, lady! Sheesh! Actually I was relieved when she announced this because in the last year she had begun to be hostile towards me. I felt more like I was being chided in our sessions than counseled/helped.

My psychiatrist at the same place was a real wierdo-- I don't know how else to describe the guy. Even though I showed up on time for appointments there were many times when I had to wait over an hour or even longer-- and this just to pick up a prescription from him! Redicilous! I appreciated that he would ask me how I was doing and spend a little time with me. Trouble is, often when I would talk to him his eyes would droop and he'd get this look that I could only describe as "spacy." It was strange. He's gotten my prescriptions wrong before and he always asked me if my age was 21 when writing my prescriptions! I was flattered, but I'm 37 for crying out loud! I do look young for my age, but 21?! That seems to be quite off. Then there was a counselor I had one time that actually fell asleep while I was pouring my heart out to her.

The first experience I had with a wierdo shrink was with this guy whose wife was the receptionist. In my sessions with him, she would come in repeatedly, interrupting the sessions as if she was checking to make sure nothing suspicious was happening. My mother who came with me a couple of times was very impressed with him and how intently he listened to me. I, however, sensed something was strange. I figured maybe it was all in my head.

He told me that he had developed some kind of award-winning program on the computer that hypnotized people. Oh really? I said. What was I supposed to say. He showed it to me once and I just said it was interesting. Then, during one session he just told me to relax, close my eyes, etc. I knew what he was trying to do-- hypnotize me-- and without my permission. I course I resisted and I never went back to him after that. Flash forward a few months. I was watching the news and suddenly, there he was on the news being taken away in a police car! Come to find out he had been counseling a couple with an unusual kind of therapy by moving IN WITH THEM! Of course he did this with their consent, but I guess this isn't what led to his arrest. Apparently what had happened was when the couple asked him (probably not nicely) to leave, I guess he pulled a gun and threatened either to kill himself or one of them or something like that. I can't recall, but I was shocked. I thank God Almighty that He protected me. What would he have done to me had he succeeded in hypnotizing me? But I would never, ever allow that. I just don't trust anyone.

Sorry. I know this is long but it was good to get it all out, really. Over the years, I've found that most counselors don't have any kind of structure to their therapy, nor do they help you to define the goals you want to reach and then work out a plan with you that could be used during sessions to help you reach that goal. It's basically just going to the session, talking about things that happened during the week, a little encouragement, and that's it. Nor do they give you any practical advice as to how to help you help yourself to overcome your problems. My last counselor said there is no "magic key" to make my problems go away. Okay. I understand that. There is no magic key, or drug or cure-all. I know that, lady. I'm not an idiot. But surely there were some practical exercises or formulas I could employ to help me in a situation. For example, "Okay, well, the next time you're in this situation, try doing this and let me know how that works for you." Not that she didn't give me any advice. The best thing she told me was to learn to "live in the moment," which was good. However, she never really told me how to do that, practically. I am a woman of action. Give me some kind of instruction or method and I'll try it. Anything to help myself feel better.

Also, sessions usually consisted of just hashing out the same things over and over again without really coming to any resolution.

I would never say "stop going to counselors because you're wasting your time." Look at it like shopping for a pair of jeans. You have to try on many "pairs" many "brands" before you find one that fits. Along with counseling, I would recommend this book, which has been a tremendous help:

Shortcut Through Therapy-- Ten Principles of Growth-Oriented, Contented Living by Richard Carlson. He really helps you in this book to cut through a lot of the bull in therapy and get to the practical nitty-gritty of actually helping you to feel better! My personal copy is beat up and highlighted everywhere. This is what one reviewer said of the book:

"Consequently, I started the book with a negative impression, primarily due to the title, but the title is precisely what the advice in the book offers: Specific principles the majority of therapists never teach their clients, principles that if practices regularly, would put a GREAT number of therapists right out of practice. (In fact, most therapists have harped on and on indoctrinating principles in their clients for decades that are the antithesis of the ten principles that Dr. Carlson teaches. Their attempts at assisting their clients usually result in needlessly prolonging one's therapy rather than curtailing it when it is time to move on to a happy, meaningful life."

You can read about it/order it here:

http://tinyurl.com/252l2q
I hope my long rant and this book will help you! Thanks for your patience!

merlin8015
07-18-07, 12:05 PM
Ok, umm, that's alot of reading don't know if i can get through all that in one sitting, haha. Anyway, I saw the shrink less then a month ago for the first time ever, this was after I had been thinking about everything that was going wrong in my head and my life. I didn't have any answers for why though. I went to the shrink and worked through the list of stuff that i came up with, in about 25 min. the shrink started to smile, I got ****ed and said,"can you fill me in on something cause I am getting mad at you smiling at me like that" she said, you just diagnosed yourself with ADD. So I did more research and its like reading a biography just in a different environment. So no, i think i would be alot worse if i never spoke with the shrink when I did. As anything though I am sure there are plenty of people out there that don't care and are there for the $.

mctavish23
07-23-07, 12:47 PM
I would look for someone who has good "word of mouth" referrals,especially if you're looking for a clinician who specializes in a specific area of interest.

Most, if not all, of my referrals come by "word of mouth" referral.

I'm really proud of the fact that this is the 4th summer in a row in which I've had a word of mouth referral from the Minneapolis/St.Paul/Twin Cities area;which is roughly 3 1/2-4hrs away.

They've all gone well and each one has returned ( or will be returning later this summer) for a follow up appointment before school starts.

A valuable resource is whether or not the clinician/therapist has an Informed Consent Memo.

This should tell you what they specialize in and /or their competentcies.

I've had my own since 1995;even though our community mental health center has one too.

With mine, I advertise an "evidence based" practice;which essentailly means research supported questions & issues shown to work in the real world.

Thanks for the feedback.

tc

mctavish23
(Robert)

Scribeman01
07-30-07, 12:19 AM
I think that everyone has interesting thoughts on psychiatrists. Essentially, their job is to diagnose you and to prescribe the right meds to help you be able function well enough to make the additional steps you need to move forward. I have been going to the same therapist for over 20 years now. He is very supportive and has found what seems to be the best med combination for me. I think that you have to also engage a psychologist, social worker, or ADHD coach/advocate to help you develop from the stages that the medication allows you to function. Your psychiatrist and/or advocates will help you to focus and leverage to what works best for you and what makes you the happiest when you get out of bed each morning.

You bring up a great question and also I enjoyed reading everyone's take on this here.

Guest1
09-04-07, 08:25 AM
no no not the one dignosed me some other lady i went to talk to recently

mijahe
09-04-07, 08:49 AM
I've always thought that shrinks were for 'mad people'. Until I discovered that my son and I had ADHD. Now, I've only had a couple of interviews with shrinks, and they have gone well so far. However, I read an interesting thing in "Driven to Distraction", (sorry I'll have to find exactly where later), where the author made the point that you have to really get along with your shrink. It's no good going to see someone where you just don't click. This can make all the difference IMHO between a really bad experience and an effective counseling tool.
This issue is made worse by the fact that you might have limited choices in your area. In the US I can imagine there are plenty of choices, (correct me if I'm wrong), as there's not so much of a stigma attached to going to a shrink. In other parts of the world, like Oz for example. I have a choice of 2 in my state that deal with ADDers.

busyhermit
09-04-07, 09:51 AM
Essentially, their job is to diagnose you and to prescribe the right meds to help you be able function well enough to make the additional steps you need to move forward. ... I think that you have to also engage a psychologist, social worker, or ADHD coach/advocate to help you develop from the stages that the medication allows you to function. Your psychiatrist and/or advocates will help you to focus and leverage to what works best for you and what makes you the happiest when you get out of bed each morning.

That's what I was thinking about, Scribeman. Lowering my expectations down to the level of reality. I've had lots and lots of go-nowhere, wasted-time therapy over the last, oh --- 25 years. Here are a few of the mistakes I made: During much of it was drinking alcoholically. During all of it, I was looking to be saved. Well - therapists are not angels sent to save anybody, so needless to say I was disappointed. I had no problem talking openly about most things, but kept the worst bits to myself, I'm afraid. ...Worried that even the therapist would be shocked and disgusted by me. Yeah, I'm a sick individual - quite a few issues other than attention/focus - and I tend to end up twisting the therapist-client relationship into something far from useful.

I've only recently gone back after 10 years without, and am trying to take a different tactic this time. Rather than catering to this twisted need of mine to be "saved", I decided I would choose just two realistic "goals" - things that were the most important to me, and that I actually have some hope could be changed - which are to be a better wife and a better mother. Lots of issues involved in both of those - plenty to work on, and there is a real desire for change there.

Biggest mistakes my therapists ever made?

1) Focusing on my depression and never bothering to look for the real problems behind it.

2) Constantly trying to force me to participate in social situations, based on the a**-backward theory that this would fix my depression. As far as I know, my social anxiety (which appears to actually be schizoid personality disorder) was never even diagnosed or addressed even though it is an integral part of my being. NOTE: If you have no desire to change something, it ain't gonna happen!

In the very first meeting with my new therapist, we were speaking of my goals for therapy and she was wonderful enough to ASK - "do you want to look at/work on these social issues?". No I do not - that is who and what I am, and I have no desire or need to change it at this time. And she just said OK! What a relief! For once, I feel she is someone who is willing to listen and help me find ways to cope with what I am, rather than try to change me into an NT. :)

ProcrastN8R2
09-04-07, 11:28 PM
the lady i went to recently did nothing for me your supposed to talk to her about everything it seems to me she got my money and never fixed me

Psychiatrists don't fix you. They help you fix yourself.

Grimlock
09-05-07, 01:18 AM
You have to PAY?!?? :eyebrow:

Michiko74
09-08-07, 01:12 AM
When someone described to me the different functions of mental health professionals, it made the relationship with my psychatrist much better. As far as I'm concerned, my psychatrist looks after my body.. so to speak. Although he can help me to manage my ADHD, any feelings, rants and rages have to be addressed by someone else.

Once I understood each person's role, I would say my visits with my Dr. went very well.

mctavish23
09-12-07, 09:31 AM
Those were all very well articulated.

Please remember, YOU are the consumer.

My biggest frustration is that very few(psychologist's) seem to read the research.

That's a MUST if you want to "get the right answer."

tc
mctavish23
(Robert)

lostwitness
09-26-07, 09:42 PM
You definately have to be choosy about who you counsel with because this is someone you are trusting with one of your most important parts of yourself-- your heart. I give every counselor/psychiatrist/etc. a "trial" period of say, 6 weeks or so, during which I just try to tell them about myself and a little about my problems without going into great detail if I can. If at the end of 6 weeks I feel comfortable with them and I feel they'll help me, then I open up to them a little more.

I have been going to counselors, etc. since I was 5 years old and I have to admit I have made some progress, but not the amount I was hoping to get. Most counselors I've had have been supportive and kind, but some were not and others were... well... just plain wierd :confused: My last counselor told me at our last meeting that that day was going to be our last session because she was stepping back from counseling at the time. Gee, thanks for giving me so much advanced warning so I could make other plans, lady! Sheesh! Actually I was relieved when she announced this because in the last year she had begun to be hostile towards me. I felt more like I was being chided in our sessions than counseled/helped.

My psychiatrist at the same place was a real wierdo-- I don't know how else to describe the guy. Even though I showed up on time for appointments there were many times when I had to wait over an hour or even longer-- and this just to pick up a prescription from him! Redicilous! I appreciated that he would ask me how I was doing and spend a little time with me. Trouble is, often when I would talk to him his eyes would droop and he'd get this look that I could only describe as "spacy." It was strange. He's gotten my prescriptions wrong before and he always asked me if my age was 21 when writing my prescriptions! I was flattered, but I'm 37 for crying out loud! I do look young for my age, but 21?! That seems to be quite off. Then there was a counselor I had one time that actually fell asleep while I was pouring my heart out to her.

The first experience I had with a wierdo shrink was with this guy whose wife was the receptionist. In my sessions with him, she would come in repeatedly, interrupting the sessions as if she was checking to make sure nothing suspicious was happening. My mother who came with me a couple of times was very impressed with him and how intently he listened to me. I, however, sensed something was strange. I figured maybe it was all in my head.

He told me that he had developed some kind of award-winning program on the computer that hypnotized people. Oh really? I said. What was I supposed to say. He showed it to me once and I just said it was interesting. Then, during one session he just told me to relax, close my eyes, etc. I knew what he was trying to do-- hypnotize me-- and without my permission. I course I resisted and I never went back to him after that. Flash forward a few months. I was watching the news and suddenly, there he was on the news being taken away in a police car! Come to find out he had been counseling a couple with an unusual kind of therapy by moving IN WITH THEM! Of course he did this with their consent, but I guess this isn't what led to his arrest. Apparently what had happened was when the couple asked him (probably not nicely) to leave, I guess he pulled a gun and threatened either to kill himself or one of them or something like that. I can't recall, but I was shocked. I thank God Almighty that He protected me. What would he have done to me had he succeeded in hypnotizing me? But I would never, ever allow that. I just don't trust anyone.

Sorry. I know this is long but it was good to get it all out, really. Over the years, I've found that most counselors don't have any kind of structure to their therapy, nor do they help you to define the goals you want to reach and then work out a plan with you that could be used during sessions to help you reach that goal. It's basically just going to the session, talking about things that happened during the week, a little encouragement, and that's it. Nor do they give you any practical advice as to how to help you help yourself to overcome your problems. My last counselor said there is no "magic key" to make my problems go away. Okay. I understand that. There is no magic key, or drug or cure-all. I know that, lady. I'm not an idiot. But surely there were some practical exercises or formulas I could employ to help me in a situation. For example, "Okay, well, the next time you're in this situation, try doing this and let me know how that works for you." Not that she didn't give me any advice. The best thing she told me was to learn to "live in the moment," which was good. However, she never really told me how to do that, practically. I am a woman of action. Give me some kind of instruction or method and I'll try it. Anything to help myself feel better.

Also, sessions usually consisted of just hashing out the same things over and over again without really coming to any resolution.

I would never say "stop going to counselors because you're wasting your time." Look at it like shopping for a pair of jeans. You have to try on many "pairs" many "brands" before you find one that fits. Along with counseling, I would recommend this book, which has been a tremendous help:

Shortcut Through Therapy-- Ten Principles of Growth-Oriented, Contented Living by Richard Carlson. He really helps you in this book to cut through a lot of the bull in therapy and get to the practical nitty-gritty of actually helping you to feel better! My personal copy is beat up and highlighted everywhere. This is what one reviewer said of the book:

"Consequently, I started the book with a negative impression, primarily due to the title, but the title is precisely what the advice in the book offers: Specific principles the majority of therapists never teach their clients, principles that if practices regularly, would put a GREAT number of therapists right out of practice. (In fact, most therapists have harped on and on indoctrinating principles in their clients for decades that are the antithesis of the ten principles that Dr. Carlson teaches. Their attempts at assisting their clients usually result in needlessly prolonging one's therapy rather than curtailing it when it is time to move on to a happy, meaningful life."

You can read about it/order it here:

http://tinyurl.com/252l2q
I hope my long rant and this book will help you! Thanks for your patience!I found your situation so comical! A counsellor actually fell asleep on you? hahahahaha

QueensU_girl
09-30-07, 07:21 AM
I really recommend what others say about getting referrals from friends.

I also really (really) recommend doing a good group therapy program at least once.

It will teach you about yourself (and your thinking/beliefs/feelings/hangups/unconcious habits) and how you come across to others, and show you how you are "getting in your own way", in ways that you and a shrink would never get to in 1:1 conversations and 1:1 appointments.

"Groups are for therapy" [bumper sticker]

lamour
10-01-07, 01:01 AM
My shrink didn't do much either in the first few months.. and then... slowly started giving me all kinds of pills.. lexapro, xanax, paxil, zoloft.... i've been through so many that i've lost hope... i think shrinks ARE a waste of money... now she'll prescribe me with parnate (http://www.drugdelivery.ca/s3929-s-PARNATE.aspx).. I just hope it's more effective than others! i just hate being as I am! I wish i were normal!

Crazygirl79
10-02-07, 06:16 AM
Marytza.

Most shrinks as Speedo said generally do more talking in the first and sometimes the second visit in order to get an idea of what your situation is, however if they do more talking and no action after the second visit then my advice would be not to go back to them and find another therapist...after all we go to them for advice that is practical not a chit chat.

Overall I don't think shrinks are complete waste of money but you do have to shop around for a good one.

Selena:)
the lady i went to recently did nothing for me your supposed to talk to her about everything it seems to me she got my money and never fixed me

ADDrienne
10-04-07, 12:49 AM
Find a Dr you like, one that will work with you. As far as "fixing you" you will have to get a good dr, and work with them. You sort of have to help yourself there. I really like my dr. But, I had a bunch of jerks before him.

QueensU_girl
10-04-07, 03:01 AM
re: 25

that is disturbing to hear you doc is a pill pusher. i tend to like my docs a little tighter with the Rx pad. :) ime, some who aren't so skilled rely on meds too much, rather than teaching people how to help themselves and 'resource' -- internally and externally.[U]

re: PARNATE

Can't you have a reaction w/ that?

Skully
10-14-07, 10:58 AM
Some are really bad. I work in mental health and I come into contact with a lot of shrinks. Some should be stipped of their license for sure. Mine is pretty good, the best in my area in my opinion.

Matt S.
10-20-07, 10:42 AM
I think that in the event of a person taking the same meds at the same dose and being stable for a significant period of time, it is probably not hard to have the meds faxed to the GP and having him write the scripts for you, but until that point I try not to think of my shrink as a waste of money.

randomthoughts
10-24-07, 09:56 PM
if im just starting out looking for a therapist and psychiatrist, how would i go about finding them? Just a matter of googling up someone local and trying them out? Certainly, like everyone else, I would want to find someone who actually cared about their practice and (in my case) specializes bipolar/psychosis type disorders.

Draga
10-25-07, 09:51 AM
I used to think that, .the other shrinks would just throw a prescription at me and anyting I tell them they wrote down but got the info jumbled and obviosuly didn't listen :mad: But then, after my lil nervous break down(gee I wonder y) I met my previous doctor and the new doctor I am seeing now..they are total professionals who knows a lot about the meds they prescribed to me on how to take them, the side effects, and what to look for about the results.

The doc I am seeing now, did not put me on ADHD meds at first, he seen my hyperness and depression more of an issue and wanted to get that more stable before we worried about the adhd....I was kinda annoyed about not being put on ADHD meds at first but when I thought about it...it made a lot of sense and obviously he (and the other doc) had listened to me and my problems, sure they made notes too, but also shared their advice and views on what I shared.

It was kinda funny when I was wearing a shirt that said "Bad Girl" on the front and he asked me if I was really a bad girl, well, since I dont get out much, dont mean I cant be a lil devil when I can,...I wont exactly tell ya'll bout what I confessed...but I will say...I cant believe he asked me if my Mother knew about the things I been doing? :eyebrow: :foot:

Hello!! Doc, I am 31 and even if I am still living at home, there are things mommy dont need to know..lol....he actually agreed and it was kinda cool that he didn't pass judgement but even understood.


In other words, Cha', some shrinks are such quacks they developed webbed feet from the start....but their are the other ones who make ya glad to have them help you...n they are the easiest to open up to....the trick is to find this dude!!! :eek:

~boots~
10-25-07, 10:13 AM
the lady i went to recently did nothing for me your supposed to talk to her about everything it seems to me she got my money and never fixed mesomehow, I don't think we can be *fixed* but we can be helped..maybe you could look for some else to talk to

Arei
11-12-07, 03:04 AM
Its sure a waste of my gas money. I'm really not getting the results I want. I like my shrink, but shes a ways away from my house and I don't think I'm getting enough for the distance I have to travel and the traffic I have to sit in and the stupid drivers that cut me off like 3245 times, and all the gas my truck burns like its nothing to go over there and back =P

Iamscattered
11-18-07, 01:34 AM
In my experience therapy only works for me if I am really motivated and willing to work (reading, journaling, meditating, attending workshops, etc.) between sessions. Just showing up each week didn't work.

I once held a job for a couple of years where one of the benefits was unlimited therapy sessions with no co-pay. Yet each time I tried therapy it didn't work out well. I don't think I had enough personally invested, and because it was free I figured I could always get serious about it in the future.

The best (and first) therapist I ever went to (for about 3 years) was unlicensed and I paid full retail. I worked hard. I have been to many therapists since and none have come even close to her in terms of intelligence, knowledge and empathy. Since I stopped seeing her in the mid 1990s she has gone on to get her P.H.D. and has written several respected books on the subject of therapy, and now makes her living training other therapists in work-shops all over the world. So you never know.

I would not visit someone unlicensed again, but it does go to show, you don't want to pick your therapist by degree only. Most Master level therapists I have met have been better than psychologists (P.H.D.) and for me M.D.s (psychiatrists) are the worst of all.

Also I want to add that Group Therapy (as a previous poster recommended) was huge for me. It was scary (I have done it twice), but transforming in ways individual therapy could never be.

Iluvpoptarts
02-08-08, 06:54 PM
Psychologists suck imo.
They sit n "hear you out" n take tons of money and tell you "you're fine" which you're obviously not.
See a psychiatrist/neurologist or smt.. they actually help.

ozchris
02-08-08, 07:32 PM
With psychologists you generally get out of it what you put in I've found. They can be extremely helpful for lots of people and not at all for others.


It's important to have someone you feel comfortable with and it often takes a few sessions for each of you to get to know each other.


You've got the wrong idea about this lady 'fixing' you. Maybe read up a little bit on basic psychology before spending more money? Just so you know what to expect.

busyhermit
02-09-08, 01:30 AM
With psychologists you generally get out of it what you put in I've found....I agree, even though that was always very disturbing for me to hear. Perhaps because if I thought I could do a d*** thing for myself I wouldn't be there to begin with. But mostly because I couldn't stand myself. Ever been asked to do something for someone you hate? I didn't want to take responsibility for my recovery. I just wanted to stop hurting. I wanted to be saved. Needless to say, I found therapy (and medication) to be disappointing, over and over.

I'm happy to say that this time is different. Finally I am willing to do something myself - but I give most of the credit to my therapist. Never have I met someone so understanding of the craziness that I live with in my head. She is the first person in a long long time to tell me something about myself that I didn't already know. That impresses me. But that's not all, because all the talk in the world does not make me better. Fact is, something needs to be done and done by me. This is the first therapist I've ever had that has been able to give me things to do, ways to take action, ways to make changes - even if they are teeny, tiny ones - because every teeny, tiny change paves the way for more. I feel different. I feel empowered. I feel less of a victim.

Therapy can definitely work. But perhaps much depends upon the person's readiness and the therapist's methods. If it's anxiety and negative thinking you're dealing with - find one who practices cognitive behavioral therapy.

Scattered
02-09-08, 02:06 AM
Good post, Busy Hermit!

When you say shrink (going back to the initial question), I guess it depends on who you call a shrink. If you're talking about psychiatrists, they're generally not going to have the time to talk to you much and are primarily helpful in handling medication rather than talk therapy. A good psychologist or counselor on the other hand who has been trained to understand and work with ADD can be a real asset. Cognitive Behavioral therapy seems to be the most effective approach in dealing with ADD.

I've benefited greatly by working with my shrink (psychologist). And I definately think what you take out is proportional to what you put into it. No one else can "fix" you, but they can educate you about ADD, help you see your blind spots and unhelpful thinking patterns, and support you while you make changes.