View Full Version : Okay I feel like poop


Spongedaddy
09-10-07, 10:39 AM
SOrry to take up so many threads, but I felt like sharing. I am really down in the dumps and feel like cr@p. I have had a down day three out of the last five and today seems to be the worst of them. This is day five of the Topamax. I am feeling somewhat hopeless and overhwlemed. We have to move in the next few months because moving here was a mistake (it's wayyy too expensive, we never really wanted to got and I went on a mania impulse that being close to her family would change them) and I know I am going to need to change my job in the next few months (they ahve new owners, I am slowly being squeezed out and with my condition I think I need to find something less stressful). Except for my wife I don't have a lot of support. A few of my so called friends flew the coup (is it a coup?) over the last year. So sorry to be dumping all over the forum, but I felt down and just wanted to vent.

Thanks for letting me vent, I will now insert eh obligatory smiley :faint:

kikins
09-10-07, 11:09 AM
Hey spongedaddy,
I'm sorry you are having such a tough time. Where will you move to? Is it someplace better? I dont have alot of advice just wanted to send some support. HUGS!

justhope
09-10-07, 11:12 AM
No need to apologize. If this place...or rather section was full of happy smilies...one ,I would puke because it would all be lies and I would know I was in the BS zone.....or we would all be flying high in mania...and waiting for the bomb to drop.

So STOP apologizing....it goes with the territory..besides if you were posting all roses..I would know you were lying through your teeth.

I know that Lamictal works pretty fast..although even 5 days is a bit much for it. Did you talk to the pdoc on how long the typical time frame is until you feel some relief? I know they like to stick with the 4 week thing usually? I don't know much about it. I will have to do some reading so I know a little bit about it. I wouldnt' get to frustrated yet. Unless you nose dive into really bad depression that is out of charcater for you. Then it might be the meds. Unti then give it another couple of weeks. Sorry I know you dont' want to hear that....but it's often the case it takes at least 3-4 weeks to start reaching the threraputic blood level.


5 days is entirely too early to get a good lift..Spongey....although not to early for crappy reactions as we saw with the Lamictal.

You are in the funk zone....after the wonderful mania zone last week, members? Look at your post last week? Member avoiding the temptations of selling games etc. Are you journaling? Watching the cycles?
I know you are probably NOT in the mood for crap today....I hear you.
But it's always a good thing. Then you can see it for yourself, and anticipate the "normal" flows that are not brought on by "triggers". There is such a thing.
Mine ebb and flow....and then bam hit out of no where because something jolts me into one. ...the normal ones are bearable because I know they are coming.

I relaxed this weekend. Although eating and spending almost the entire weekend , mostly in pj's is not necessarily all a good thing. I did manage to fib enough yesterday to avoid a visit to to my mother in laws...just to have a few hours by MYSELF....I managed to get myself off the bed...do dishes..feed pets....make my bed....and a few other menial tasks..that is a huge accomplishment considering. So I take it in stride. The mess with my son...not sure you are familiar with the saga...under Loss of a Child in the BP/ADHD kid section here.....but that threw me into a mixed cycle..for a while..then I just turned off the tears...turned off the computer and forced myself to sleep at 2am....

Sponge...it's not easy, hun. Even medicated. However, the pulling out is easier. The first thing you need to do is let go of the mistakes you made...there is not a damn thing you can do about it now, except clean up a little at a time, when you are Level. Spending time with your kids on a regular basis is wonderful. And they will remember those days...and the days that you made mistakes will drift away...and be replaced by the consistancy and the dad you will slowly become once meds and your life style changes start working for you.

No easy answers, no magic over night cures...We are not the most patient folks anyway, esp the BP/ADD combos..what a double whammy.

But if you keep it in mind, and perspective you can overcome it.
That is all you can do.
Remember what I said, feel it, own it and then don't stay to long. Put it on the shelf of crap you can't do anything about, 2 of them, 1 shelf for I can't do crap ever, and one that you will work on one day at a time....

And keep venting it's nothing to stuff, be ashamed of or apologize about, it's healthy and that is where the hope begins and the hopeless ends.

Hope ;)

TeLL
09-10-07, 11:21 AM
hey spongedaddy! no need to appologize! : ) we all need to vent sometimes.

my add coach showed me the stages of depression in AD(H)D, I don't know if you've come across them but when your down, the ONE thing that will help you get back up is having something to look forward to. just trying to keep up with the daily bull will keep juat about anyone down. just figure out what it is you want to manage to do with yourself. even jsut finding something you enjoy doing will give you that much more reason (subconciously) to find a solution.
trust yourself, and beleive in what your doing. :) were here if you have another bad day!

Spongedaddy
09-10-07, 11:32 AM
I know that Lamictal works pretty fast..although even 5 days is a bit much for it. Did you talk to the pdoc on how long the typical time frame is until you feel some relief? I know they like to stick with the 4 week thing usually? I don't know much about it. I will have to do some reading so I know a little bit about it. I wouldnt' get to frustrated yet. Unless you nose dive into really bad depression that is out of charcater for you. Then it might be the meds. Unti then give it another couple of weeks. Sorry I know you dont' want to hear that....but it's often the case it takes at least 3-4 weeks to start reaching the threraputic blood level.


5 days is entirely too early to get a good lift..Spongey....although not to early for crappy reactions as we saw with the Lamictal.

You are in the funk zone....after the wonderful mania zone last week, members? Look at your post last week? Member avoiding the temptations of selling games etc. Are you journaling? Watching the cycles?
I know you are probably NOT in the mood for crap today....I hear you.
But it's always a good thing. Then you can see it for yourself, and anticipate the "normal" flows that are not brought on by "triggers". There is such a thing.
Mine ebb and flow....and then bam hit out of no where because something jolts me into one. ...the normal ones are bearable because I know they are coming.

I relaxed this weekend. Although eating and spending almost the entire weekend , mostly in pj's is not necessarily all a good thing. I did manage to fib enough yesterday to avoid a visit to to my mother in laws...just to have a few hours by MYSELF....I managed to get myself off the bed...do dishes..feed pets....make my bed....and a few other menial tasks..that is a huge accomplishment considering. So I take it in stride. The mess with my son...not sure you are familiar with the saga...under Loss of a Child in the BP/ADHD kid section here.....but that threw me into a mixed cycle..for a while..then I just turned off the tears...turned off the computer and forced myself to sleep at 2am....

Sponge...it's not easy, hun. Even medicated. However, the pulling out is easier. The first thing you need to do is let go of the mistakes you made...there is not a damn thing you can do about it now, except clean up a little at a time, when you are Level. Spending time with your kids on a regular basis is wonderful. And they will remember those days...and the days that you made mistakes will drift away...and be replaced by the consistancy and the dad you will slowly become once meds and your life style changes start working for you.


Hope ;)
I am on Topamax now because I started getting a rash while on Lamictal although now six.seven days off lamictal I am still having a slight itchy problem so I am not certain if it was the Lamictal.

It's so hard to let go. I was supposed to be this smart creative guy and every time I got close I would blow up the damn bridge (forget about burning it). I know I am where I am supposed to be (how can one argue with what is..well one can, but it is futile), but it is so hard some days.

I guess I am getting hit with a ton of triggers right now and that isn't helping. I really find it hard to give myself some slack. Hmmm guess that never happens to Bipolar/ADHD people :eyebrow:

justhope
09-10-07, 12:18 PM
I am on Topamax now because I started getting a rash while on Lamictal although now six.seven days off lamictal I am still having a slight itchy problem so I am not certain if it was the Lamictal

I member...that sucks...but glad there is something else......


It's so hard to let go. I was supposed to be this smart creative guy and every time I got close I would blow up the damn bridge (forget about burning it). I know I am where I am supposed to be (how can one argue with what is..well one can, but it is futile), but it is so hard some days.
You are a smart and creative guy...BP can't take that away. You will find over time...your self destructiion will become less and less, as you overcome little obsticles..and see that you are not a screw up. I understand...if we always screw things up and always feel like failures .....when things begin to go right...we can't take it...feel it's just a matter of time before it's screwed up again..and often times , instead of waiting for the bridge to fall down...we blow it up. Yep guilty....and that is exactly what my son did....



I guess I am getting hit with a ton of triggers right now and that isn't helping. I really find it hard to give myself some slack. Hmmm guess that never happens to Bipolar/ADHD people :eyebrow:

yep you are...and you are spinning the hamster wheel obsessively right now....That is a part of the beginning stages ....
I hope you were being smart.....abouit the last line...right that never happens

Spongedaddy
09-10-07, 01:01 PM
Yeah I was being a wisenheimer (sp) about the last part. I am so bad at cutting myself slack and it seems like so many of us who need to give ourselves slack, don't.

To make matters better there was a huge mess that wasn't my fault and I wound up having to return my 360 machine and am waiting on a correciton before I can get it back....which is one of my bigger triggers...which is nice....

Crazy~Feet
09-10-07, 05:16 PM
Sponge, I am late to the party today, and I am glad to see that you've had so many great, supportive relies already. I couldn't have done any better :) and there's no need to repeat it.

I am just relieved that you keep on posting. Its not taking up space, that's what this place is here for!

So sorry its hard on you these days. Patience can be so hard to come by. I don't have much myself! Its a point in your favor that in spite of all this, you are able to maintain a great sense of humor, and I suspect that you will improve by inches...no..centimeters...no...FEET :D...one day at a time.

Spongedaddy
09-10-07, 05:24 PM
THanks everyone. I have gone from sadness to nervousness and irritability. PLUS we found out my daughter has scabbies AND what I though was a Lamictal rash might indeed be mites caught from my daughter (it's still around). The dermatologist gave me a script as well.

I am not certain if it's me or not, but there have been, oh say about three times, when my eyes went in and out of focus...I hope it's not the Topamax. I am going to bring up the mites issue with the PDoc and see if I should go back on Lamictal...actually it occured to me that I really am having trouble focusing my eyes which is unusual so I am calling the PDoc right now...


...ugh I hate that office...my PDoc works there part time and the woman is telling me that he's not there today and she doesn't know if she can find him..I'm like lady he's a doctor in your office and you don't know how to page him????? OKay I am abusing this smiley but....:faint:

Crazy~Feet
09-10-07, 06:34 PM
That's awful Sponge! The rash might really have been the scabies. Dangit! Have you seen a GP to determine that, or can you? That might shed some light on the situation. I know you had an initial good response to Lamictal. Man! No wonder you're overwhelmed!

:faint: <--- I love this smiley. I don't think it can be overused, especially at times like this.

As for Topomax...I am not one to give an unbiased answer about it. I know it works well for certain people, and is supposed to be great for those who have a hard time taming mania, but...I hated it. I was not hypomanic at all while I took it, true, I have to admit that. Did you get over to my blog and read about my experiences while taking it? If not I'll post them here if you'd like to see my story.

I will say this much, qualified by the fact that I am not a doctor and cannot make medical determinations...I would not be a bit surprised to discover that the Topomax was making your eyes have difficulty focusing.

Spongedaddy
09-10-07, 06:47 PM
How do I read those particular posts on your blog? We saw a dermatologist today so the scabies is official.

I am pretty certain the Topamax is making my eyes go batty and to top it off I am now so overwhelmed I have starting having a panic attack...and hit italics apparently....

busyhermit
09-10-07, 07:58 PM
Hang in there Sponge. Deep breaths - it'll be ok. Hunt down that pdoc tomorrow!

justhope
09-10-07, 08:11 PM
Ok Spongey....

I will post this..since I"m thinking linkies are not in your most important things to do today....
And buddy, please stop...hyperfocusing on everything that can go wrong...poor thing...you are making yourself a wreck....gosh I'm sorry...this sucks for you...

This is all found on PDR or the lovely Physcian's DeskTop Reference...love this thing..miss the real one at my mom's...

Ok now take a breath.....

<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=2 width="90%" border=0><TBODY><TR><TD width="80%">Brand name:

Topamax

Generic name: Topiramate

<HR>Why is Topamax prescribed?

Return to top (http://www.pdrhealth.com/drug_info/rxdrugprofiles/drugs/top1541.shtml#TOP)
Topamax is an antiepileptic drug, prescribed to control both the mild attacks known as partial seizures and the severe tonic-clonic convulsions known as grand mal seizures. It is typically added to the treatment regimen when other drugs fail to fully control a patient's attacks.

Topamax is also prescribed for the prevention of migraine headaches (also known as prophylactic treatment). However, due to a lack of studies, it's not known whether the drug can treat acute migraine attacks.

<HR>Most important fact about Topamax

Return to top (http://www.pdrhealth.com/drug_info/rxdrugprofiles/drugs/top1541.shtml#TOP)
Do not abruptly stop taking Topamax. If the drug isn't withdrawn gradually, the frequency of your seizures could increase.

<HR>How should you take Topamax?

Return to top (http://www.pdrhealth.com/drug_info/rxdrugprofiles/drugs/top1541.shtml#TOP)
It is important to take this medication exactly as prescribed. It can be taken with or without food. Avoid breaking the tablets; the medication has a bitter taste.

Topamax capsules may be swallowed whole, or the capsule may be opened and its contents sprinkled on a teaspoonful of soft food. To open the capsule, hold it so you can read the word "top" and carefully twist off the clear portion of the capsule. The drug and food mixture should be swallowed whole and not chewed. Do not store the mixture for future use.

Topamax increases your risk of developing kidney stones. To prevent this problem, be sure to take this medication with plenty of fluids.


If you miss a dose...
Take it as soon as you remember. If it is almost time for your next dose, skip the one you missed and go back to your regular schedule. Never take two doses at once.


Storage instructions...
Store Topamax at room temperature in a tightly closed container. Protect the tablets from moisture.
<HR>What side effects may occur?

Return to top (http://www.pdrhealth.com/drug_info/rxdrugprofiles/drugs/top1541.shtml#TOP)
Some side effects, such as fatigue, are more likely to surface with high doses of Topamax. Others occur regardless of dosage. While many tend to disappear after the first 8 weeks of therapy, it's still important to report them to your doctor. Only your doctor can determine if it is safe for you to continue taking Topamax.


Side effects may include:
Abdominal pain, abnormal coordination, abnormal vision, agitation, anorexia, anxiety, appetite loss, back pain, breast pain, chest pain, confusion, constipation, depression, difficulty with concentration, difficulty with memory, dizziness, double vision, drowsiness, fatigue, flu-like symptoms, indigestion, language problems, leg pain, loss of coordination, menstrual problems, mood problems, nausea, nervousness, nose inflammation, rash, sinusitis, slowing of movements, sore throat, speech problems, tingling or burning sensations, tremors, weakness, weight loss
Topamax has also been known to cause a number of very rare side effects in adults and children (typically striking less than one person in a hundred). If you develop any unfamiliar problems while taking Topamax, report them to your doctor.

(I am leaving the full blown version out to save reading time, the link is below for you if you wanna...go....

Because Topamax sometimes causes confusion, dizziness, fatigue, and problems with coordination and concentration, you should not drive, operate machinery, or participate in any hazardous activity that requires full mental alertness until you are certain how the drug affects you.

And please don't freak out...but since you can pull the slip out of the script bag if you kept it....this one last thing....

Topamax has been known to trigger severe nearsightedness along with increased pressure inside the eye. The problem usually occurs within 1 month of starting treatment. If you develop blurred vision or eye pain, call your doctor immediately.

Ok dang it...there it is...DON'T STOP Taking it until you talk to the doctor. It appears unless it's really bad...it's normal...cripes...

www.pdrhealth.com (http://www.pdrhealth.com)

</TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE>

Spongedaddy
09-10-07, 08:43 PM
I called the PDoc office again and hit the prompt for the emergency line. My eyes feel very heavy like I had been up for days on end ( I haven't) and focusing is a big strain. I don't know what to do with the pill. I am hoping he calls me back tonight. From what I have read this eye thing is a deal breaker for this pill. However, since it now seems my rash is mite related I can probably go back on the Lamictal soon. The downside to this is that even if I am back on Lamictal the on again off again is going to wreck hell with my allreayd messed up system.

Yes my mind is now running on everything negative...my job sucking..having to find a new one..moving...etc..unfortunately I can't stop it full-blown panic attack in progress I hate to say it but I have a bad feeling the mania swing is coming...ugh...

Crazy~Feet
09-10-07, 08:46 PM
I know it sounds very trite, it always does to me anyway, but deep breaths are probably a good idea right about now. You can recognize it for the panic attack that it is, so as awful as you feel right now, remind yourself that its going to pass, if you can. Try not to become focused on the distress of it. I know that may be asking a lot, and if you cannot manage to do it, that's OK too. Can you keep posting and let us listen? You can say anything at all.


After it has passed and you feel better, please try not to get trapped by focusing on the bad stuff. That may trigger another panic attack, and nobody wants that to happen to you! Sometimes, a little distraction will help you move away from focusing on your problems for a moment. Dwelling on things isn't always good for us.

In other words, I am sending you a PM ;). Hang in there, buddy!

Spongedaddy
09-10-07, 09:20 PM
The other PDoc in the office (the one who owns the practice) called back and said to discontinue the pill. He said my vision should return to normal in a few days. Let's hope it does. He also said he will let my doc know of the situation and about my mites issue and ask my doc to call me tomorrow.

I feel like I have been ten rounds with the champ. Needless to say I am also itchy. I took a Nyquil and am goin gto sleep. THanks for the support guys. This day has really sucked but it was nice to have some friends who cared.

Crazy~Feet
09-10-07, 09:29 PM
I am so relieved that you got a call back! Please relax and take care of yourself tonight. :)

justhope
09-10-07, 10:28 PM
I want Nyquil? Does it work?


TG Spongey....poor thing....

Night night...sleep well.

Glad you were here CF...

Let's hope all is well tomorrow.....I am so grateful.....well you know....

(((( Nighty Night HUGS to Sponge }}}}}}}}

Spongedaddy
09-11-07, 02:27 PM
Okay I am having the hardest time getting a hold of my PDocs office to find out if I should go back on Lamictal. He didn't return my msg from yesterday and now they aren't picking up their main line. Are most PDoc offices this frustrating to deal with?

My eyes are still bothering me which kind of stinks. It takes 42 hours for Topamax to leave the system, but the eye problems are still here. I guess if it stayts for a few days I will have to go to the eye doctor to be safe.

Crazy~Feet
09-11-07, 02:51 PM
In my experience, Sponge, yes indeed, a pdoc is a PITA to get ahold of. I usually bug them :D and the desk staff gets annoyed, but its not them that treats me, now is it? Sometimes they apparently get tired of me and chase the doc down. I can imagine the conversation:

"Doctor! I really need to talk to you!"

"Yes, what is it? I'm very busy!"

"Well its about your patient, KZ. She has been calling every 2 hours since yesterday! Will you please return her call before we all become your patients too??"

:D Squeaky wheel gets the grease.

Typically a pdoc is pretty much jammed schedule-wise...they have back to back appointments, and if a patient has a crisis, they might need to respond (well they have to respond at some point, but the nature of the crisis tends to dictate how fast they choose to make an appearance).

Any chance this doc has a nurse practitioner on staff, or anybody who can get most of the details wrapped up, then present them to to doc basically for the purposes of filling out the RX? Wild shot, but you never know. My office has a nurse practitioner on certain days. :rolleyes: Pdocs are annoying to reach!

Spongedaddy
09-11-07, 04:14 PM
That's a great idea, but unfortunatley this office doesn't carry such a thing. I finally got a hold of the office and they said they would call his cell phone again. Good grief!

All my 360 problems worked out though and the errors Paypal made last week were corrected so I'm back in business with my hobby at least.

Crazy~Feet
09-11-07, 04:17 PM
Which hobby is that? That might help a lot. Keep your mind off things and entertain yourself. :)

Spongedaddy
09-11-07, 05:20 PM
Okay he called me back today. Because of the mites he would like me to try Lamictal one more time and I agree. I think a lot of my previous problem is mite related since A) The dermatologist thought so and B) it didn't go away after the Lamictal stopped and C) It doesn't look like any of the rashes I saw for Lamictal. We are all getting treated with cream tonight and I will see the PDoc next Wed after 8 day of Lamictal. I feel somewhat less cranky now.

justhope
09-11-07, 09:33 PM
Mites...yuck...that must be the ONLY thing my boys haven't brought home yet....yikes....


Yipee....back to the Lamictal...goodie I hope it all works out for you..

Waiting....tapping.....fingers crossed....

Let us know...kay? ;)

Spongedaddy
09-12-07, 06:28 AM
Will do. Thanks again everyone for helping me through while I roar through the rapids.

justhope
09-12-07, 09:09 AM
Well I am riding the rapids with you today. The biggest problem is my old friend "hypomania" is back...and apparently I didn't think I needed a paddle......yipee....I am praying for normal later today.....at least I know now...

Glad I am at work , closed my bank account...and have no access to funds...I am safe for now...but the people I work with not so lucky.....they are wary because I am too happy today..LOL that is funny isn't it.

Hope :eek:

Matt S.
09-12-07, 09:29 AM
I've been Out of Commision for a bit but had some time after my 3 mental Hospital trips and the move to another town (impulsively I might add) to say hi and check my 1,000 new posts, stable and overmedicated, too.

justhope
09-12-07, 11:24 AM
Hi old friend...

I was just talking about the "missing" guys....you and Jesse yesterday...
I must have had a sixth sense about you...or talked you up?

Sorry to hear you have been out on a hiatus...however I am happy to see you back!


;)

Spongedaddy
09-12-07, 11:49 AM
Hang in there and please keep your hands and feet inside of the boat. Hold on to all your valuables, especially the wallet, because the first dip over Impulsive Falls is a doozy.

Sending calm thoughts your way...

Spongedaddy
09-12-07, 11:50 AM
P.S. If it helps I got a case of the old pressured speech and volunteered for something I DO NOT want to do at work. Hopefully they will say no thank you.

THANK THE LORD...the guy running the project is very controlling and did not want my hands dipping in his pie...whew....okay now if I can control the impulsive urge to return and buy...

Spongedaddy
09-12-07, 11:53 AM
I've been Out of Commision for a bit but had some time after my 3 mental Hospital trips and the move to another town (impulsively I might add) to say hi and check my 1,000 new posts, stable and overmedicated, too.
I don't know you per se, but man I hope you are doing better now. It sounds like you had a rough patch there.

Crazy~Feet
09-12-07, 02:40 PM
Okay he called me back today. Because of the mites he would like me to try Lamictal one more time and I agree. I think a lot of my previous problem is mite related since A) The dermatologist thought so and B) it didn't go away after the Lamictal stopped and C) It doesn't look like any of the rashes I saw for Lamictal. We are all getting treated with cream tonight and I will see the PDoc next Wed after 8 day of Lamictal. I feel somewhat less cranky now.:) Now that's really good news, Sponge. I'm really glad you get to go back to Lamictal and give it another try, since you initially responded so well.

Well I am riding the rapids with you today. The biggest problem is my old friend "hypomania" is back...and apparently I didn't think I needed a paddle......yipee....I am praying for normal later today.....at least I know now...

Glad I am at work , closed my bank account...and have no access to funds...I am safe for now...but the people I work with not so lucky.....they are wary because I am too happy today..LOL that is funny isn't it. P.S. If it helps I got a case of the old pressured speech and volunteered for something I DO NOT want to do at work. Hopefully they will say no thank you.

THANK THE LORD...the guy running the project is very controlling and did not want my hands dipping in his pie...whew....okay now if I can control the impulsive urge to return and buy... Do I need to tie you both to strings and fly you like balloons? How about kites? Astonishing as it is, I am having no trigger responses to a terrible incident that happened yesterday (I'll get to that soon enough), so I am available to act as an anchor for the two of you. Y'all know where the PM button is. :)

Hope, you have a good plan in place. You know what to do and last I checked you still had a telephone ;) if typing gets to be a problem. It can for me when I get to moving too fast to make sense sometimes. Let's keep our fingers crossed that your employees are only nervous about a good mood, and not running for cover from extreme irritability.

Sponge, we all accept the pressured speech and we're used to you, man. ;) Type if you gotta type, its no biggy. Less cranky is better than its been, right? However much you manage to hold it together, that's enough for today. Hypomania is a rough ride...but let's face it, you could be in The Hole and then how would we reach you? :(


I've been Out of Commision for a bit but had some time after my 3 mental Hospital trips and the move to another town (impulsively I might add) to say hi and check my 1,000 new posts, stable and overmedicated, too. Good lord, Matt. Its really good to see you again, man. I had a funny feeling that you'd been doing the hospital tour...I am glad to hear that that's all it was. After that last trip you took to the ozone layer....well, I have to admit I was also worried that you visited the flip side, and didn't make it back out. :( Not an unreasonable fear, unfortunately. Stable is good news! Overmedicated, you can live with that. You'd better live with that, because we do NOT want to think that you'd died without it.

you and Jesse Last I spoke to Jesse, he was about to start the new school term, and was very nervous. He had just started a new med, and was unsure about it. I am hoping for the best with respect to him, maybe he needs all the energy and focus he has to function and get through his school responsibilities. I have to admit I don't like that he just vanished,and I have tried to track him down through a mutual friend no no avail.

I guess all we can do is send good thoughts out there and hope he gets them, and wait...

meadd823
09-13-07, 02:25 AM
If the rash goes way with the mite medicaine it is the mites!

Good luck on your second round of the Lamictal 25 mg

Spongedaddy
09-13-07, 05:59 AM
If the rash goes way with the mite medicaine it is the mites!

Good luck on your second round of the Lamictal 25 mg
Thanks. I broke out a bit yesterday...but...I also had the mite cream on for 14 hours so I don't know which one caused it. I figure if the rash doesn't go away by tomorrow it's probably the Lamictal. If it goes away today it's probably the cream. I will say this, the Lamictal has a quick impact on the depressive part of my disorder.

Mania..not so much...but I know when (really more of an if at this point) I get to the right dose it will be better.

Crazy~Feet
09-13-07, 06:32 AM
It can be a real drag titrating up up on Lamictal. can you imagine how long it took me to get to 300mgs? :faint: The good news is I felt a lifting of depression right away the first week, and you seemed to be having the same response at 25mgs. :) I also found its effects were better on depression, but adding a little Abilify did wonders for hypomania.

You'll find your combo, I know it.

justhope
09-13-07, 01:17 PM
Hang in there and please keep your hands and feet inside of the boat. Hold on to all your valuables, especially the wallet, because the first dip over Impulsive Falls is a doozy.

Sending calm thoughts your way...

You're sweet. I made it. I actually had no access to money. I have blocked myself off at the pass. I actually was "awake" enough to get a lot of messes cleaned up last night. Phone calls on issues I have been avoiding were done. I have avoidance issues. So I felt good about that. The ozone wasn't too bad. Thanks for the thoughts.

Do I need to tie you both to strings and fly you like balloons? How about kites? Astonishing as it is, I am having no trigger responses to a terrible incident that happened yesterday (I'll get to that soon enough), so I am available to act as an anchor for the two of you. Y'all know where the PM button is. :)

Hope, you have a good plan in place. You know what to do and last I checked you still had a telephone ;) if typing gets to be a problem. It can for me when I get to moving too fast to make sense sometimes. Let's keep our fingers crossed that your employees are only nervous about a good mood, and not running for cover from extreme irritability.
Surprisingly...no irritability. Work went off without a hitch. They were happy I was happy! Home I just managed to get a lot done, and all my family was gone while I was doing it. So that helped.

I do have plans in place. But yes I do have a phone and believe me if I need it, the fingers work fine. Thanks for offering the groud staking if needed. Today I am level, so far.


Thanks. I broke out a bit yesterday...but...I also had the mite cream on for 14 hours so I don't know which one caused it. I figure if the rash doesn't go away by tomorrow it's probably the Lamictal. If it goes away today it's probably the cream. I will say this, the Lamictal has a quick impact on the depressive part of my disorder.

Mania..not so much...but I know when (really more of an if at this point) I get to the right dose it will be better.
I didn't see as much of a lift in the mania department either Sponge, not until the higher doses. The depression seems to be the biggest and faster relief. That's pretty normal...it appears to be the case wiht all of us. I think that is why the Risperdal needs to be a normal everyday thing for me, instead of just for the non-sleeping and PMDD. Just gotta get in and see pdoc. Missed last appt, I was sick. I have a reschedule put in....


Thanks guys/gals...

Hope :)

Spongedaddy
09-13-07, 01:41 PM
Cr@p! The Wolfman(ia) came out today and I didn't get a chance to lock him in his room. I went a little nutty with returning stuff to buy other stuff and I can feel the madness overtaking me.

Darn it darn it darn it.

I am sooooooo wired right now and I just sent my poor wife off to retun something for me and buy something else. She isn't too good at this whole BiPolar thing yet so she kinda sorta not exactly wondered out loud if this was mania but didn't intervene...hopefully when I am calmer I can give her some tips on how to tell if I am gone and maybe what to do about it...awwww pooooooop......I hate this disease..

justhope
09-13-07, 03:55 PM
Good grief....do we all cycle together?

Give her your wallet, give her the receipts..and tell her to tell you no..get in the car....take the keys....and leave.

Spongedaddy
09-13-07, 07:42 PM
LMAO we are in the cycling club after all. Well I was able to undo almost all of the Wolfman(ia)'s damage and nothing major happened...whew..doged a bullet there...I am somewhat calmer now...

Crazy~Feet
09-14-07, 04:40 PM
Very glad to hear that, Sponge. :) Wondering how you are today...sorry that I missed you.

Spongedaddy
09-14-07, 07:49 PM
Very glad to hear that, Sponge. :) Wondering how you are today...sorry that I missed you.
I'm okay..still on the manic side which is now the stressed side...also getting a cold so bleah...

Crazy~Feet
09-14-07, 08:37 PM
I'm okay..still on the manic side which is now the stressed side...also getting a cold so bleah...:( Agitation when you should be resting? That's gotta suck. So sorry, Sponge.

Spongedaddy
09-14-07, 09:03 PM
It's okay. This whole trapped in an expensive area needing to move + job squeeze + dealing with new bipolar awareness is a lot. However, I am glad I am at least on the road of recovery and healing.

Crazy~Feet
09-14-07, 09:42 PM
I am glad for you, too, Sponge. I believe you are determined and that you can do this thing!!

(PS I just got done watching Shippuuden 28) :cool: