View Full Version : Secrets


ah09087
09-14-07, 01:46 AM
Have you told anyone (peers/comrades) about your LD(s)? Parents don't really count...unless your an adult I guess. What about teachers?

3/4 of my best friends know and my teachers know i'm entitled to "extended time" on SATs and the like but I think that's it.

meadd823
09-16-07, 01:34 AM
My family and spouse know. Actually any one who has tried to read my writing un-spell checked pretty well gets the picture. My nurse's notes were some times " very interesting". I worked at a doctor's office and I could find any misfiled chart in the building because I knew of more ways to miss spell a single word than any one the doc had ever meant. My dyslexia is severe enough to be obvious I learned not ashamed of my dyslexia long ago.

ah09087
09-16-07, 02:33 AM
Man! I wish I was as confident as you. I basically try to write or read as little as possible around friends and family especially since I found out I'm not dyslexic.

I thought I was but I went back over my report and I have "Learning Disorder Not Otherwise Specified" which is short for there are two many things going on with you so we don't have a name for it. lol. If I wasn't so ADD I would have read it thoroughly the first time.:o

I have alot of symptoms of most LDs (around 60-75%)but not enough for it to be one thing. So now I don't even know WHAT to be ashamed of.:rolleyes:

hollyduck
09-16-07, 07:18 AM
I'm of two minds about this. On the one hand, I want to talk to my closest friends and my closest relatives about this because it throws so much light on my earlier life, and the prospect of treatment is making me very hopeful. (It is not fun to be a retired person who has " a lot of potential")

On the other hand, so many people have so many misconceptions about ADHD that I'm guessing I would be worse off telling them the diagnosis. It's not that they know nothing, that would be easier. It's that they DO know, and would have to be untaught. Generally, I don't have time to give them the three hour seminar c/w PowerPoint slides on what it is and isn't -- especially since I'm still learning myself.

Plus, all the comorbidities like driving problems, addictions, depression, bipolar, etc. -- those are all things that I don't have which are very common in other ADHD people. (the only comorbidity that I've got is sleep apnea.)

If I were living in the United States, I might think twice about even going for an ADHD diagnosis simply because it might put me in the same insurance class as people with all those comorbidities, making it difficult to get health coverage, or maybe even a drivers license. Perhaps I'm wrong about this, I don't know. Here in Canada, I'm much more comfortable with the health system.

Ducky

Crazy~Feet
09-16-07, 02:02 PM
I'm just coming around to realizing that I've really and truly got a LD :eek: and honestly? Finding out about it is a huge relief. Designated high IQ, brilliance with language and writing skills (despite numerous typos :p I spell like a champ) was not "gelling" in my mind with things like being unable to tell time until 3rd grade, total inability to learn the times tables and counting on my fingers (both of those apply to this day). The only way that equation was working out in my mind was to cancel out the strengths and leave something equal to "stupid".

Which just goes to show you, my math skills are seriously lacking :rolleyes:.

Back when I was in school such things were not known about and I just floundered along in mathematics, and everything was made worse with the ADHD. It took me until very recently to investigate this thing called dyscalculia, although the idea had crossed my mind, since that's a very easy to interpret word with my kind of strengths. Made a bit of sense in light of my weaknesses...and recently I got bored enough and just fed up enough to investigate....and wow! :eek:

It is an enormous relief to realize that I am not, in fact, stupid at all. On the other foot, am I going to tell anybody? Probably not. I am slowly getting around to telling some of my friends here at ADDF, just for the sake of validation and comradery. I told the old man in the hopes that he would finally shut UP and stop asking me to do things that I find tremendously difficult if not downright impossible: I do not KNOW the times tables, so how am I supposed to multiply something for him, and why can't I just use a calculator if its truly important that he know?

He gave me the old "Well, you know, people tend to have an easier time with some things than others..." :eyebrow: (Don't the ones that just find things a bit harder eventually learn those things, given time?)..."I am not as good at spelling or reading as you are... :eyebrow:" (Yes, but you CAN spell and read, can't you?)...and I said "OK fine, take me back in time, to 7th grade algebra class, and YOU show me how it was only a "little bit harder" for me to learn it, and YOU teach me...because despite tutoring me personally, the algebra teacher was unable to get me to understand it, let alone learn it well enough to pass the tests."

So I doubt very much I am going to bother telling anybody else. Its been hard enough to tell people about ADHD and bipolar, if I even bothered to tell them at all, and I think adding one more "difference" to the list is just going to make things worse.

Besides, I have hidden this thing for so long, I have become really good at it. As long as I have a calculator and nobody looks very closely, I can play this off. If I ever get back to higher education, I will then demand to be tested and accomodated...because as far as I can see? Algebra has absolutely nothing to do with the field I want to go into, and tormenting me with it is a waste of time. All my recent research has been able to uncover is methods for teaching a dyscalulic at school age; I have seen no methods for reprogramming an adult who missed it the first time around. I don't have time to rewind all the way back to multiplication and learn everything all over again!

MissAdhd
09-16-07, 04:22 PM
my family knows, some of ym friends and my employer is aware of it as well.

Having a learning diability is not an excuse.. it's a hurdle and everyone has them. :)

ergop
09-16-07, 07:14 PM
I don't decide if I want to tell someone or not until it's brought up in a conversation.
I hate it when I tell a friend I'm on medication and all they can do is accuse me of being weak for running to meds.
If a friend of mine had a neurological problem that I couldn't possibly identify with the last thing I would do is pretend to completely understand what they feel and then judge how they should live their life accrodingly.

I don't think ADD/ADHD is something anyone should have to hide. I compare it to hiding your personality.
The people you surround yourself with should accept you for everything you are, adhd or not.

meadd823
09-18-07, 07:20 AM
Have you told anyone (peers/comrades) about your LD(s)? Parents don't really count...unless your an adult I guess. What about teachers?

3/4 of my best friends know and my teachers know i'm entitled to "extended time" on SATs and the like but I think that's it.

In the initial post quoted above I believe the OP meant learning disabiliteis as in Academic learning disabilites (http://www.helpguide.org/mental/learning_disabilities.htm) {dyslexia,dysgraphia,dyscalculia}that occur along side ADD. This site is huge and I spent the first six months lost as a goose in a hail storm. This is the co-existing condition section of the forum.



I do not KNOW the times tables, so how am I supposed to multiply something for him, and why can't I just use a calculator if its truly important that he know?

You mean he wants you to calculate some thing only he needs to know and tell you how you can and can not do it?

That is a rediclious :rolleyes: and it would go over like a lead balloon with me.




Having a learning diability is not an excuse.. it's a hurdle and everyone has them

The relationship between hurdle and method of ambulation would be a consideration as to the amount of difficulty a hurdle would cause.

Hurdles are just that for people who can jump them but for a person who has only one leg or is in a wheel chair then a hurdle could very well become a barrier . What is a hurtle for some to jump over is an obstacle that causes me to trip and fall flat on my ***{posterior aspect}

It would be nice if every one had the same learning disability I did so I would not have to spell check the crap out of every one of my post. The spell checking and sentence structuring take me longer that the actually writing of my post. {which often prevents me from posting an impulsive response= a good thing}


fi i saw usign ym dysxlai sa na excsue lla ym pots wuld lok liek thsi.

{non- dyslexic translation - If I saw my dyslexia as an excuse then all of my post would look like this}




Experts (http://www.childdevelopmentinfo.com/learning/learning_disabilities.shtml#How%20prevalent%20are% 20learning%20disabilities?)estimate that 6 to 10 percent of the school-aged population in the United States is learning disabled. Nearly 40 percent of the children enrolled in the nation's special education classes suffer from a learning disability. The Foundation for Children With Learning Disabilities estimates that there are 6 million adults with learning disabilities as well.***End Quote




Man! I wish I was as confident as you. I basically try to write or read as little as possible around friends and family especially since I found out I'm not dyslexic.


When you are my age you probably will be just as confident as I am . Many thing simply take years of practice and learning not to be ashamed of crappy spelling abilities is among them.

Perhaps you have a "touch of dyslexia" if you can spell badly and read bad spelling man that is close enough {IMHO}



Learning Disorder, Not Otherwise Specified: (http://www.psychologicaltesting.com/learning.htm) Can be diagnosed when there is a mild deficit in two or three of the areas listed above (reading, writing, and math) that individually fall short of diagnostic criteria, but together can be considered as a significant impairment.***End Quote



I have alot of symptoms of most LDs (around 60-75%)but not enough for it to be one thing. So now I don't even know WHAT to be ashamed of.

Nothing = no one is perfect. I think that is what MissAdhd was trying to say in her post about hurtles. {but I am not really sure because the word excuse kind of makes me go hmmmmm}

PS Figuring out what made me go hmmm took 45 minutes, two wiggle breaks, a soda and half a cholocate bar :o

ah09087
09-18-07, 07:42 PM
Learning Disorder, Not Otherwise Specified: (http://www.psychologicaltesting.com/learning.htm) Can be diagnosed when there is a mild deficit in two or three of the areas listed above (reading, writing, and math) that individually fall short of diagnostic criteria, but together can be considered as a significant impairment.
Yeah. That's what it says but nobody takes that as a real LD. I think it needs a cool name like...I dunno. I'm blanking. But yea.

The relationship between hurdle and method of ambulation would be a consideration as to the amount of difficulty a hurdle would cause.

Hurdles are just that for people who can jump them but for a person who has only one leg or is in a wheel chair then a hurdle could very well become a barrier . What is a hurtle for some to jump over is an obstacle that causes me to trip and fall flat on my ***{posterior aspect}

It would be nice if every one had the same learning disability I did so I would not have to spell check the crap out of every one of my post. The spell checking and sentence structuring take me longer that the actually writing of my post. {which often prevents me from posting an impulsive response= a good thing}


fi i saw usign ym dysxlai sa na excsue lla ym pots wuld lok liek thsi.

{non- dyslexic translation - If I saw my dyslexia as an excuse then all of my post would look like this}
I was trying to figure out how to say that but luckily you were hear to say it for me mead. lol I don't think anybody here is using it as an excuse nor gave any insinuation that would hint that they were so I don't know where that came from.

Figuring out what made me go hmmm took 45 minutes, two wiggle breaks, a soda and half a cholocate bar
Hey what ever system works for you!http://addforums.com/forums/images/smilies/biggrin.gif

Crazy~Feet
09-18-07, 07:49 PM
You mean he wants you to calculate some thing only he needs to know and tell you how you can and can not do it?

That is a rediclious :rolleyes: and it would go over like a lead balloon with me. Essentially, yes. He absolutely has to have the answer this second and there is no time at all for me to grab a calculator (its 8" square :o and its in the desk drawer right beside me in the desk).

I thought we had previously established that your man and mine didn't have a lick of sense between the two of them. :rolleyes: The truly idiotic thing is that he has no problem with math at all!!

meadd823
10-02-07, 11:16 AM
Yeah. That's what it says but nobody takes that as a real LD. I think it needs a cool name like...I dunno. I'm blanking. But yea.

Inconsistent Divergent Learning Difficulties- IDLD!

What do ya think sounds serious enough?

That is rather silly makes me wonder who has the disability going on. It seems like having some problems with word perception and some problems with word order, comprehension while also having some problems with concepts of math would actually be MORE difficult than simply having dyslexia. My learning disabilities are pretty much confined to a few specific area - phonetics / letter sequencing / perception . . . .okay but it doesn't effect my ability to comprehend in context or calculate.



The truly idiotic thing is that he has no problem with math at all!!

Moronic request combined with the patience of a spoiled three years old ummmm could be symptoms of PMS - pathetic male syndrome.

boone1
10-02-07, 02:30 PM
Some of my friends and a few of my teachers know about my LD but most people don't know.

Crazy~Feet
10-02-07, 03:43 PM
Moronic request combined with the patience of a spoiled three years old ummmm could be symptoms of PMS - pathetic male syndrome. LMAO...honestly, he is so good at math, he has been able to remain patient and teach it to Space AFTER HER VYVANSE HAS WORN OFF :eek:...which just goes to show ya, she does not have dyscalculia. Finally, I can say she missed the scourge of one set of my genes. Her 'sperm donor' was a whiz at math, too.

QueensU_girl
10-04-07, 01:56 AM
re: #3

Those darn DSM _NOS_ categories, yeesh. (NOS - not otherwise specified)

I really think that's where they put people who they haven't figured out yet. :)

supersomeone
10-15-07, 04:45 PM
for some reasson i am much more open about my add like if i were to have a couple of conversations with people and i know who they are then yeah lol i would tell them about add.But with my ld(not sure i think it is non specific..no disgraph (sloppy hand writting weak hand mussles) and very very mildily dislexic)) i do not tell anyone i guess because it all goes back to elementry school(sad i know :)) and i was unmedicated for majority of it.So i was made fun and i was also chuby little kid hehe .............oh right (sorry lost train of thought for a second) so i do not say anything about it because i dont want any comments on it or ???? also for that matter .I only tell ppl who HAVE to know about it and my very close inner circle of friends(2)lol

meadd823
10-17-07, 05:22 AM
so i do not say anything about it because i dont want any comments on it or ???? also for that matter \

Gee some times I wish I had a choice in the matter but when I whip out one of these post (http://www.addforums.com/forums/showpost.php?p=461933&postcount=25) it makes my dyslexia very obvious.

I edit re-edit and edit again not because I am ashamed but because I try to be responsible for my own impairments. Most people are not dyslexic and if I want my post read I have to write them like most read. So as you look over my blunder realize I probably read the damn post five times and spell checked it four before posting so it couldn't even be categorized as a careless mistake . . . . I get comments on it as can be seen a few post down but I have learned to have a sense of humor about it. My spelling sucks and has for decades now. Getting all upset won't change that{I tried} . . . .nothing I do has changed it so I figure the only thing I could change was my perceptions thus my attitude so that is what I changed. I accept it as a part of who I am and I have learned to see the positive with the negative.

Yea I get laughed at but I also see the benefits. Had I not been dyslexic I would probably not have been able to remain a member here much less a members of staff. I have a sarcastic streak a mile long and can whip out an insult faster than billy the kid could draw his gun. . . my dyslexia prevent me from being able to write legible insults. . . the massive editing time gives my ADHD brain time to consider other more appropriate ways of approaching conflicts.

Looking for the good along with the obvious bad gives me the ability to not feel bad about it. I am in my 40's and people still laugh but frankly I have to admit some of my blooper are funny. I not only write things wrong I also read things wrong which can paint some pretty interesting pictures in my mind. . . . a member wrote in a post about having cake and clowns at her party . . well I read she was going to have cake and clowns in her panties. . . it painted an interesting picture in my head. Good thing I was too busy laughing to respond to that post for a while.

supersomeone
10-19-07, 09:46 PM
lol that is really great ! : ) yeah sarcasm and spelling errors are things i do not lack

Skully
10-26-07, 08:36 PM
Funny thing is, I haven't really told my family (father, brother) but some of my coworkers know. I will make mistakes that are really stupid like spell a simple word completely wrong so I kind of had to explain. They never really say much. I am always shouting out "how do you spell...." from my cubicle.

meadd823
10-31-07, 02:41 AM
I used to get the look it up in the dictionary okay I did until I pointed out the fact that one must know how to SPELL a word to be able look it up - if I knew how to spell the damn word I would not need to look it up because I know what it means - hello

So I spell badly but my logic is intact.

ah09087
01-05-08, 07:27 PM
I used to get the look it up in the dictionary okay I did until I pointed out the fact that one must know how to SPELL a word to be able look it up - if I knew how to spell the damn word I would not need to look it up because I know what it means - hello


haha. I tried explaining this to my parents all the way through elementary school.