:)
Hi all,
New here. I am a British mother to Alexander (81/2 years - only child) and live in Athens, Greece. Firstly, I just want to say how great it is to finally find somewhere to discuss my concerns and, as such, would greatly appreciate your help/opinions. I am looking forward to getting to know you all.

Firstly I would like to apologise for this very lengthy post but I think I should explain our situation so that you have a clearer idea of why I am posting here.

My son has not been diagnosed as having ADHD and, unfortunately, I know very little about it. I have not been to any doctors yet and this disorder is not really known about in Greece. In fact I am not sure where the best place is to go. The only knowledge I have gained sor far is from the internet and from what I have read, it sounds as though my son could have ADHD.

To elaborate, he has difficulty in following requests/instructions (in that I have to repeat the instruction/request many times before he responds, especially if he is doing something else at the time - hates being interrupted and feels he has to finish what he is doing at all costs), appears not to listen, seems disorganised, has trouble with tasks that require planning ahead, forgets things often, is easily distracted, is extremely fidgety (unless he is sleeping :rolleyes:), hums/sings continuously whilst he is playing, runs & climbs inappropriately, blurts out answers, interrupts alot, talks a lot, is continuously on the go and has a huge problem waiting for things (very impatient).

There is no problem with his school work (in fact, he is the top of his class and is very bright) but he gets bored easily and disrupts the class. He is always bobbing up and down and cannot keep still. Lately, he has also developed a habit which concerns me. He flicks his hands to the side (from his wrist) when he is thinking about something, talking, is excited, or is anxious. It looks like a nervous twitch and most of the time he doesn't realise he is doing it. I have avoided talking to him about it, because I don't want him to think that there is anything wrong with him. However, the other day it got so bad, I was worried he would hurt his wrists. I asked him if his hands were bothering him, if he was in pain and gently pointed out the habit to him. In fact, that's exactly how I explained it as a "habit" like biting your nails or picking your nose. He replied that he does it because he likes doing it, but I am 99 % sure he really doesn't realise he is doing it :confused: I am really puzzled about this. He also went through a stage of clicking his fingers continously for about 6 months, but it wore off. This has been going on now (on and off) for about a year. The other thing is that he walks on his tip toes and just practically bounces all the time.

He hates any kind of "group" activity, especially sports (of any kind), although he is quite happy to kick a ball around with his Dad or play basketball with me. More than 2 or 3 people and he is not interested. In fact, he's not a very social person in general and a lot of the time I need to push for conversation and a basic "hello" or goodbye" to people we know. I have tried to get him into some kind of physical acitivity because I think it is important for him to expel all that extra energy he has, but to no avail. His three great loves in life are playing with lego, watching t.v. and playing computer games (I limit the time to one hour for computer every day after he finishes his homework and 1 DVD every two days). He does music classes once a week and is learning piano. He loves building things and taking things to bits to see how they work. He is a mastermind with lego and has a talent for art. We try to take him out on Fridays and at the w/ends as much as possible (especially as he is an only child) with friends who have kids. Week days are hard for me because I work full time and travel 1 1/2 hours to and from work, so much of Monday to Friday we stay at home (apart from his music on Wednesday which is nearby). My husband works very long hours and is usually home late at night, so much of the time, I am on my own with Alex. I live away from my home country and do not speak the language very well, enough to get by, but not fluently.

Alex had a very traumatic birth with emergency C-section and and I had severe post natal depression for 2 years (took antidepressants). I recently had a miscarriage and have been very up and down (hormonal).

My son is a great kid, has a kind heart and a terrific sense of humour. He does tend to look on the negative side of things a lot and has a very sensitive but stubborn character. I tell him I love him and that I am proud of him. I don't push him to excell at anything, but I do expect him to make an effort and try his best. I certainly don't want to label his behaviour and I know that much of it could possibly be boiled down to normal 8 year old boy behaviour. However, my maternal instincts keep nagging me and telling me that something is not right..... can you help? Any advice?
Thanks so much for listening for this long!
Tash

One thing to know, ALWAYS trust your maternal instincts. Sure, there will be times when it's just mother's worry, but NO ONE knows your kid better then you do. If instinct says something is wrong, follow up on it. :)

OK, that out of the way, I'm off to my standars help list. I don't know enough about Greece to say what will work there, but it's always worth looking into, I think.

Talk to his doctor. It's awlays a good place to start, espcially when you don't know where to go, or what is avaliable in your area. Explain your concerns, but try to keep from locking yourself into the "he's ADHD" mindset (I know, could have saved a year of trouble if we hadn't done that). You can also speak with the school and see if there's any help avaliable in that area.

Try looking for a psychartrist on your own. Preferable a child one. Talk to parents and see if they know of any. networking is your best friend here. :)

You mentioned he's really into art. Have you ttried an art class for him? Since it's already an intrist he might like a class in that more then something he's not intrested in.


Most importantly, know that you are not alone. We're here for you for support, advice, a shoulder to cry on, or a place to vent without being made to feel like you're a horrible parent. And remember, you are not a bad parent for this. Don't ever let anyone tell you differently.

Has his auditory memory been tested?

It's not that the kids are being bad and "not listening" (on purpose).

Their auditory memory is impaired. (Like they are sort of deaf.)

Thank you for your advice / input, your support means so much ;)

I have decided to go with my maternal instincts and am trying to find a child psychiatrist in my area. Perhaps hubby and I will go by ourselves the first time around to explain our concerns, as we do not want to have to put him through an analysis if it is unnecessary.

I have not had his auditory memory tested, what does this involve exactly - is it a common thing, where do I go to do this?

What do you think about the hand flapping thing, perhaps a nervous energy thing, as opposed to an ADD related problem?

Sorry for these additional questions and many thanks again for your help, have a good day guys :p
Tash

It could be his way of calming himself down. My son grabs his hair (big handfulls). it looks like he's about to rip it out, but all he does is grab and hold. he does that when he's getting frustrated to help calm himself. Odd, I know.

It could also be just random movement, ADHD kids fidget alot. It helps to keep them focused (oddly enough). Or it could be stress. My suggestion, don't make a big deal of it, and it will probably go away on it's on. If you focus on it, it could cause more stress.

:) Lady Lark, thanks for your thoughts - you could be right. Apart from the hand thing though he does seem to fidget a lot. For example, when he is watching t.v. he bumps up and down on the bed, moves his legs from side to side, gets up and then moves around etc. I think the only time he is completely still is when he's asleep:( he also hums to himself pretty much all the time (at the moment it's the Star Wars theme and there are only so many times you can hear the first 5 bars of that without going completely insane :eek: ! Also, once he gets started on talking about something, he just doesn't stop and you cannot get a word in edgeways.

I have still not had much luck in finding a child psychiatrist, they are very far and few between over here.

Thanks again, will keep you updated.

Tash

Humming. Oh how I hate humming. It might not be so bad if it was a real tune, but Steven just randomly picks notes and repeats them over and over and over again. Or he makes these nonsense sounds that are half word have who knows what and repeats those.

Kids are born with the gift of always knowing what your button is, and the inability to keep from always pushing it.

Tash , alot of what you are saying is excatly what my son has, my son constantly flicks his hands and bends them also when hes agitated, he has adhd and apparently its just part of adhd a way of releasing frustration , when his ritolin is onboard these things seem to ease but when he is coming near to the ritolin wearing off the first thing you notice he does is start rapidly moving his fingers and hands, i think we all tend to have funny things we do when we are nervous or agitated i for one always play with me hair!, but for a child with a mental issue i suppose it is more pronounced, i really hope your child gets the help he needs real quick to ease his anxiety , i wish you all the best xxxx

Hi there Tash! My son is 7 1/2 and was diagnosed with mainly inattentive type AD/AD earlier this year. We started Ritalin in May and I have a new little boy. :)

From reading your description our kids have many things in common. Mine also had a emergency c-section birth, is a genius with Lego, loves computer games and loves tv. He is also extremely verbally impulsive and impatient. Shortly after starting Grade 1 this year he also developed a nervous twich or tic, in his case blinking.

It can't do any harm to have him evaluated. If he does have AD/HD proper medication can make such a huge difference, its definately worth looling into.

Welcome to the forums Tash!

Firts of all, I'm not a doctor, but I'm going to share what I know with you. You described what could be ADHD in your child. You also described some other things that could be motor tics or could just be habit, and the tiptoe walking could be an indication that he might have mild sensory issues. You might want to take note as to if your child is bothered by loud noises or bright lights, or has unusual sensitivities to clothes or food texture., because some kids with ADHD are very sensitive and might react to strong sensory input in ways thet seem odd.

Some people are just different, and often really bright kids are just kind of different and often will march to a different tune. If he is having difficuty such that it is causing problems for him, then you want to consider the possibility of disorder.

At this stage of the game there is too little information to speculate as to what he has going on, but disorders like adhd, ocd, touretts syndrome, and pdd can present themselves in much the same way you have described when they are mild, so don't rule out anything at this early stage.

Below is a link to the diagnostic criteria for adhd.

http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=23276

good luck!

Me :D

:)
Hi all,
New here. I am a British mother to Alexander (81/2 years - only child) and live in Athens, Greece. Firstly, I just want to say how great it is to finally find somewhere to discuss my concerns and, as such, would greatly appreciate your help/opinions. I am looking forward to getting to know you all.

Firstly I would like to apologise for this very lengthy post but I think I should explain our situation so that you have a clearer idea of why I am posting here.

My son has not been diagnosed as having ADHD and, unfortunately, I know very little about it. I have not been to any doctors yet and this disorder is not really known about in Greece. In fact I am not sure where the best place is to go. The only knowledge I have gained sor far is from the internet and from what I have read, it sounds as though my son could have ADHD.

To elaborate, he has difficulty in following requests/instructions (in that I have to repeat the instruction/request many times before he responds, especially if he is doing something else at the time - hates being interrupted and feels he has to finish what he is doing at all costs), appears not to listen, seems disorganised, has trouble with tasks that require planning ahead, forgets things often, is easily distracted, is extremely fidgety (unless he is sleeping :rolleyes:), hums/sings continuously whilst he is playing, runs & climbs inappropriately, blurts out answers, interrupts alot, talks a lot, is continuously on the go and has a huge problem waiting for things (very impatient).

There is no problem with his school work (in fact, he is the top of his class and is very bright) but he gets bored easily and disrupts the class. He is always bobbing up and down and cannot keep still. Lately, he has also developed a habit which concerns me. He flicks his hands to the side (from his wrist) when he is thinking about something, talking, is excited, or is anxious. It looks like a nervous twitch and most of the time he doesn't realise he is doing it. I have avoided talking to him about it, because I don't want him to think that there is anything wrong with him. However, the other day it got so bad, I was worried he would hurt his wrists. I asked him if his hands were bothering him, if he was in pain and gently pointed out the habit to him. In fact, that's exactly how I explained it as a "habit" like biting your nails or picking your nose. He replied that he does it because he likes doing it, but I am 99 % sure he really doesn't realise he is doing it :confused: I am really puzzled about this. He also went through a stage of clicking his fingers continously for about 6 months, but it wore off. This has been going on now (on and off) for about a year. The other thing is that he walks on his tip toes and just practically bounces all the time.

He hates any kind of "group" activity, especially sports (of any kind), although he is quite happy to kick a ball around with his Dad or play basketball with me. More than 2 or 3 people and he is not interested. In fact, he's not a very social person in general and a lot of the time I need to push for conversation and a basic "hello" or goodbye" to people we know. I have tried to get him into some kind of physical acitivity because I think it is important for him to expel all that extra energy he has, but to no avail. His three great loves in life are playing with lego, watching t.v. and playing computer games (I limit the time to one hour for computer every day after he finishes his homework and 1 DVD every two days). He does music classes once a week and is learning piano. He loves building things and taking things to bits to see how they work. He is a mastermind with lego and has a talent for art. We try to take him out on Fridays and at the w/ends as much as possible (especially as he is an only child) with friends who have kids. Week days are hard for me because I work full time and travel 1 1/2 hours to and from work, so much of Monday to Friday we stay at home (apart from his music on Wednesday which is nearby). My husband works very long hours and is usually home late at night, so much of the time, I am on my own with Alex. I live away from my home country and do not speak the language very well, enough to get by, but not fluently.

Alex had a very traumatic birth with emergency C-section and and I had severe post natal depression for 2 years (took antidepressants). I recently had a miscarriage and have been very up and down (hormonal).

My son is a great kid, has a kind heart and a terrific sense of humour. He does tend to look on the negative side of things a lot and has a very sensitive but stubborn character. I tell him I love him and that I am proud of him. I don't push him to excell at anything, but I do expect him to make an effort and try his best. I certainly don't want to label his behaviour and I know that much of it could possibly be boiled down to normal 8 year old boy behaviour. However, my maternal instincts keep nagging me and telling me that something is not right..... can you help? Any advice?
Thanks so much for listening for this long!
Tash

:) Thank you all for your input and ideas. I am definitely going to get my son evaluated. It means so much to have somewhere to share and have people who understand what our children and we are going through.
Will keep you updated ....
Have a good weekend everyone.
Tash