View Full Version : a poem for those who think men all want the slim/slender girl!

01-30-04, 01:41 PM
I didnt write this poem, but I do think its one of the best ever...Its by a british guy name Attila the stockbroker...its pretty blatant....but its something that doesnt get said enough in my proud of who you are no matter what you look like...


Prepubescent imagery.
Empty, stupid eyes.
Waif thin.
No fat.
No body hair.
No character, no love, no personality -
no brain.
So thin, and yet...
so thick.
By your anodyne complicity
in this gruesome stereotype
you connive
in the corporate enslavement of your sisters
- anorexia, bulimia, self-loathing, fear.
They aspire to be like you
- an unnatural creation of capital -
and wreck their bodies in the process,
destroy their fertility,
tear apart their lives.
But hang on a minute?
Not my place to talk about that?
I'm a man, what do I know?
You're just trying to earn a living?
What I'm saying has been said before?
But when the football blokes look
and make some expected remark
I'm supposed to join in.
I'm supposed to fancy you -
or pretend to.
Well, I don't.
And I won't.
More than that.
You revolt me.
You give me an inversion.
It's quite simple really.
I just don't desire a stupid adman's toy
styled to look like a prepubescent girl
- a real 'babe' -
there in the tabloid
next to the lurid description
of Gary Glitter's downfall.
I love a real woman.
I won't buy the product you advertise.
I won't watch your latest film.
I'm not interested in your poxy TV series
I'll never set foot in that bloody car
and I hate you.
I know I should just ignore you, or feel sorry for you
but I hate you
and your fashionist masters
bringers of misery
destroyers of individuality
harbingers of despair.
Women and men:
Riot against diet!
Sod the microchip revolution -
let's have a fish 'n' chip one!
Cream bun chocolate cream bun chocolate
lard lard sag aloo beer beer beer!
Riot against diet!
Smash fashionism!
Say goodbye to Hello!
Make Cosmopolitan....cosmopolitan!
Let's have a real woman's realm!
Take over the curry house
Fill your freezer full of ice cream
Get real!

Attila the Stockbroker
29 November 1999

01-30-04, 03:51 PM
All I can say is "wow" and I'm going to look for Attila the Stockbroker on the net because I want to marry him.

01-30-04, 04:00 PM
YAY (while you're over there you can send back some british women for me!)......I thought someone might like that poem....he's pretty cool.....

01-31-04, 12:39 AM
My lady love is heavier than I am, and I'm about 40 pounds or more overweight...

I will admit to being attracted to slender women... but that's if all I ever have to go on is a photograph of them. The moment they open their mouths to say something, I will get a much truer idea of whether they are someone who interests me or not.

The mind is the sexiest part of the body! :cool:

01-31-04, 08:09 AM
All i can say is "AMEN", When does the Diet Riot start, i want to join.

01-31-04, 02:44 PM
He's probably (like most artists) a royal pain in the *** to live with, so I guess I won't marry him even if he insists (j/k!!!), but I admire his activism and passion so much.
The rest of his poetry is worth looking at too. He's da bomb. :D

02-01-04, 12:44 AM
also, he's married.... (not to burst your bubble) to Robina. I checked out that link. he's pretty cool. :)

02-01-04, 01:03 AM
I know better than to discuss my wife weight and size

and Im typical 50 ish truck driver

great poem

loved it

02-01-04, 11:40 AM
I think the big thing for me is not body weight, or size, or whatever....its completely about image....if someone is comfortable with the way they are, then it comes out in their behaviour...I used to be a rather portly myself, I was really ugly...I wasnt comfortable in my own body, but I didnt want to be a thin or sporty muscular type (I just dont have that kind of body....wasnt meant to be that way). Anyway, long story short, I did a gruelling routine of sit-ups (usually 150-300 before bed)....I eventually took all/most of the wieght off, and for a while I felt better about myself, but realized that feeling better was based on what others saw in me and not what I saw in myself (not to mention that I was no longer enjoying life....I hate "diets" per se...your diet is everything you eat and people who "go on diets" for a certain period of time to lose weight, are actually damaging themselves I believe....changing your diet is/should be something you do for dont have to stop eating anything, but just be more conscious of what the effects are of food choices...and while doing with out dessert or whatever may help to take off the few pounds, its also important to realize that no one should put others physical judgements before personal pleasure!

PS...the diet riot started already, we're jsut waiting for others to join....(I am eating a can of pringles for breakfast myself...HAHAHAH).

02-01-04, 12:57 PM
Judit -- I'm crestfallen! Actually it makes no difference whether he's married, gay or whatever. Thanks for doing the research, though. His attitude is so rare it's depressing.
And I'm not male-bashing. It seems sometimes like we're all under some spell of unrealistic expectations of each other.
Women have their own form of "pornography" (which I define by imposing one's own desires on someone and objectifying them as something other than pure fantasy rather than deal with a real person). For us it's the romantic movies, novels, magazines etc. Not a a problem and reletively harmless unless we actually believe or expect to permanently manifest those fantasies.
Most of us interpret our world from the vantage point of popular culture (ie magazines, tv shows, romance novels and movies, soft porn etc). Don't most women want what they see as ideal as well? We all forget that everthing in media world is airbrushed, starving, constructed and in no way representative of reality. (I saw an interesting study that the male tolerence for less- than - perfect women has declined due to media exposure to "perfect" women -- they think they actually have a shot at the 1% of 15 yr old supermodels!). They see geezers in action movies with hottie wives/girlfriends and want that too (who wouldn't). The gals at work are now talking about how if their boyfriends/husbands don't cough up certain gifts and gestures at Valentine's Day, they'll be in the doghouse. Or they express dissapointment that he isn't "romantic" enough or isn't always there for them. Sometimes I think we expect more of one another than we are personally prepared to deliver. Sometimes I think that we want our lovers transform themselves into something closer to our "ideal" in which case they'd be phoney.
Apologies for the long rant. I guess I feel more passionate about this than I thought.

02-01-04, 02:06 PM
MY GOD! MARRY ME NOW! PLEASE! speaking of peoples views/attitudes being are officially the first woman I know to recognize that the perfect romantic dude with sensitivity/compassion/great job/always thoughtful with a nicely chiseled body is "pornographic" (and quite unattainable for most guys). I agree with you whole heartedly that men, unfortunately have ridiculously high standards for what they want in a woman...there does have to be some degree of mutual attraction but unfortunately most guys have a really screwed up idea of what attractive women are (I would really like to burn down the headquarters for both COSMO and MAXIM magazines....both of em are a pox on society in my opinion...and yeah, I ahve done quite a few of those "is he worth a darn" surveys in womens magazines (usually for a laugh)....and I always end up rather depressed because I will never measure up...I apparently also dont measure up to the standards set to me in the male mags either...I am just not a big enough prick (get yer minds out of the gutter) to be a real guy...I only know how to be one thing...human...anyway, yeah, I agree with you....its not wrong to have romantic expectations and what not....but we also have to realize that A) the lusty lovey part of the relationship lasts about a year and a half to two years and there had better be a darn good friendship at the end of that or the relationship will go kaput! B) that we are only human and we will screw up...(especially us ADDers) we have to learn to forgive each other for wrong doings and to forgive ourselves as well....anyway....yeah, be good to each other....and dont always focus on the bad things someone has done....everyone is gonna do something stupid from time to time....weigh the good and bad things and make a decision based on that!...SO....I think I just said exaclty what you did in a off the wall kind of way...I have never been good at summarizing anything....hehehehe

02-01-04, 03:07 PM
I married a man 13 years older then myself and it had nothing whatsoever to do with his checkbook or looks; but, had everything to do with his attitude, stregnths(which counter balance my weakness's).

First thing I notice on anyone is their eyes then I look at their smile or lack thereof.

Outside beauty is only going to get you so far,,,eventually gravity WILL take over.

02-01-04, 03:35 PM
wooohooo...way to go....

02-01-04, 03:45 PM
I'm rather proud of myself too...

02-03-04, 10:39 AM
I hope my views aren't rare (although many would disagree with the idea that what some women want can be pornograpbic). I am in no way saying it's bad to be romantic -- I just believe that it's a quality we have, not something to "get" (ie. to buy or sell) or get fetishistic about. I absolutely agree that a tolerant and forgiving attitude is IMO are more important than being or having the "right" person as defined by popular media. Unfortunately, what's "right" changes every 15 minutes. Even the most dedicated ADDer can't manage that.
So here are some big questions I have:
How much are the expectations we have of each other informed by the pack instinct ?
How important is it that our friends, family and general public see our lover as a "trophy"?
What about biology? Doesn't it make sense that we would want the best deal to mate with? Are we animals? Is this ok?

03-09-04, 01:28 PM
Personally, I think the anorxic look is disgusting. This is not just because of a lack of chest size, it's because of a lack of muscle and fat. Yes, a lack of fat is disgusting. I want to be able to see a girl who has curves, and I don't mind if there are curves in her belly, or how big the curves of her thighs are. I just want to be able to see that she has curves somewhere, to have a fgiure of some sort, rather than being a straight line ( || = figure of fashion ) As for personality, if it isn't a good one, the girl is not worth being with, no matter how "good" she looks. I must admit that I am also occasionally attracted to thinner girls who really should have more meat on them, but, like everyone else here, I am human! And futs is right about gravity, a perky chest will only be perky until it's been around long enough to be dragged down. The same thing with large chests on tin women, it just causes back problems and looks odd when gravity finally does do it's job. And implants, now those were society's worst invention yet, besides death sticks (cigarrettes)! Don't feel good about yourself? How about we put some unnatural bag of silicone in you to make you more shapely according to what is fashionable. And for anyone who wants a girl that is super thin, has no rounded chest because she's so small, and will stay that way until she dies, and won't get warped by gravity, and will have a cuddly personality, get a fixed female cat. Mine will love me no matter what I do, and will always be cute. Society needs to be smacked, and hard. Love is a function that the hearts do, not the male/female organs, and real love is not simply attraction, which is what society wants us to believe. And this perspective is coming from a guy that girls are lining up for, just ask melanie... lol. I personally don't care about my looks, I mean, I like to look good, but that's because I like seeing myself in a muscular manner, not because others like the way I look. I even put on about 20 lbs of fat this year, and I am loving it! I have a cushioned seat now! I can sit without feeling my hips hit the chair! Anyone who says fat is a bad thing is out of their mind. And as for burnin down the cosmo building, I'm all for it. Send me an email and we'll get together. :-p

03-23-04, 12:07 AM
To me its all about body image, own and the image of others in magizines.

Loved the poem BTY,....will check out more og his work topo.

Being a larger woman, body size has always in the past directly affected my self esteem. It took me many yrs to accept who i am as a person and not who i am based on my size. I know im smar, others tell me im pretty but i dont feel like i am. I have come along way but i still have a long way to go.

Thinking back on my life, i also realize my perseption of myself as a person, " fat and better take any guy who shows an interest in be or be alone " has led to some very unstable and even abusine relationships. I now realize that because i felt unworthy i often settled.

I do know for myself and many others, women in particular, body size and self esteem is directly linked to personality too. Others can see the beauty within that i have never seen. These days i dont care about my body size as much as i do about being fit and happy. It all comes down to accepting oneself before others can accept you as a person. And i am still learning to accept myself.

04-15-04, 08:16 AM
BnB is so totally right. i have felt that way all of my life, and that is probably why i have had alot of short relationships. and for some reason because of my size i always thought that in order for a guy to like me i had to put out....well they liked me alright, at least until they got bored, or they got thier conquest. it is hard being a bigger woman...hard on the body, the heart and the soul. i still complain about my weight...right now i am the biggest i have ever been (310 roughly) and i hate it and am trying to change it for me. because it is hard on my body...i am only 5'7 my back hurts, my hips ache, and my feet swell. and it is hard on my heart because of all the strain on my body and it is hard on my soul because of the low self esteem. i dont know how many times i have told myself that the world would be better off without my fatass. but then i look at my kids and think that i need to do something before i end up with a heart attack and not able to watch them grow up and my grandkids grow up (although that better be a long time from now) anyhow i am rambling and i apologise. just wanted to let people know they are not alone.

04-15-04, 11:19 AM
The health issue is the kicker! I have a friend I can't go anywhere with on foot, because it is so hard for her to get around. I kind of secretly resent that because I am woried to lose her.

I like myself thinner mostly cause I have more energy, also then my facial features show up better. I have more curves (waistline) when I am thinner. But I am not talking skinny anorexic, I do think the very skinny women/girls are gross.
I don't diet, just get busy and active so I don't have as much tme to eat.
What makes me sad is that women as far as looks go, are considered in their prime before they are women.

04-15-04, 02:38 PM
Getting back to what was said earlier about how the romance novels, etc act as pornography. If you want to see how vain our teenage daughters are becoming, just sneak your way into a conversation between 7th and 8th grade girls. Being a teacher of those grades, I've heard my fair share of them. It sickens me when girls continue to lust after and persue boys whose personalities would make lice barf because "He's hot".

I'm overweight - have been most of my life. I spent my teens being ignored by girls because of the way I looked. My wife is heavy, but she is the most beautiful woman I know. I fell in love with her mind long before I noticed the body (long story there).

Where are our children going to start getting that looks are good for lust, not for love?


04-15-04, 02:53 PM
took me this long to read this and it literally put me in tears. To have a man, act as a man, protect like a man, stand up like a man, and be an individual------I felt protected and loved by that poem. I want to reprint at my site but need permission. Do you know how to reach said writer?

04-16-04, 03:39 PM
I would be lieing if i said i didnt have fantasies while reading a harlequin romance novel....i am only human and love thinking about romance and love and all of that. and although my man isnt Fabio by any means(if he was i wouldnt be marrying him) but he satisfies my mind which is more important. we have been together for almost 3 yrs and the sex life just isnt what it used to be. but there are times i daydream about what it would be like if we didnt have any kids and were starting out just the 2 of us....he came into a ready made family and then i had my 3rd and his 1st child. and the sex life has just gone to almost nothing.
anyhow this is not a sex discussion.....the point i was trying to make is that it is okay to think of what if......i looked like this, or what if....he was like that......but it is going to far when you can not accept yourself because you DONT look like that...does any of this babbling make any sense cause it isnt making much to me

04-17-04, 08:39 AM
The poem is brilliant, it has been printed out and taken its rightful place on my refrigerator. I live in England, home of the sickly looking waif, but things seem to be changing, designers and clothing lines catering for the "real" woman, with super curves. Even "Dove" dont know if you have that in the states, have huge billboards with curvier women on them, YAY I say. The only reason a person should diet in my opinion is if weight is affecting their health.

04-28-04, 10:24 PM
I donít like this kind of stuff. If itís wrong to make fun of fat people it is also wrong to make fun of skinny people. If you are not attracted to someone, move on and find someone more to your liking. To me the guy is just being a jerk.

(No I am not thin by the way.)

11-15-05, 11:40 PM
I didn't like this poem. Not all skinny people are stupid, hollow, or boring. You shouldn't judge people by how they look.

12-02-05, 01:11 AM
i agree only ashes. since when was it ok to bash thin people? if i posted a poem about how horrible i think fat people look i doubt i'd get this much encouragment

03-18-06, 09:58 PM
I'm not going to lie and say I"m not jealous of thin women. i am. It's really hard not to believe that thin women have it easier. Though you can have an unrealistic view of yourself no matter how small, the current social idea of beauty is made for small women.

Personally, growing up it was always hard seeing my sisters (both thin) have multiple boyfriends, while I sat on the sidelines. I couldn't help but think there was somthing fundamentally wrong with me and that I would always be alone. Trying to reason that I didn't need anyone to fullfill me didn't help, because as independant as I am i still get lonely.

People have always told me what a funny and sweet person I am but so far that hasn't been enough for men to really take much interest in me. It's hard to avoid making generalizations about what men really care about.

I often wander what would happen if I was a normal weight for my height. If I was and then found myself in a relationship, how would i know if I was loved for my true self and not because I was thin and "beautiful"?

03-18-06, 11:18 PM
never seen this before..

Just be happy with who and what you are.

My husband says no matter how nice of a body, or how gorgeous a girl is.. there is a guy out there somewhere who has had enough of her crap. :) :)

03-29-06, 03:28 AM
I know a lot of these posts are really old but I resent the fact that it is socially acceptable to tell a thin person that they look sick or disgusting but if a thin person tells a heavy person they look sick or disgusting it's seen as cruel and hurtful. It is cruel and it does hurt and I would never say it. Complete strangers, usually women, come up to me a lot and actually say things like....You make me sick, look how skinny you are. Don't stand near me because you make me look fat. You look anorexic. Do you eat? You need to go eat something. And my all time favorite, How do you stay so skinny? Hmmmm....I exercise twice a week and I eat right. What a concept, right? Lately I have actually lied a few times and said "I just have a good plastic surgeon, would you like his number?" It's easier on me to lie because then they don't start calling me names.

I would never say the things that are said to me to a heavy person or a skinny person. Everyone has their own idea of what attractive is. I just wish that people would be a little more considerate of other peoples feelings.

03-29-06, 03:29 AM
Oh my gosh Lettie....I love what your husband said.

04-29-06, 10:40 PM
I think the poem is meant as a way for people who are heavy to vent their frustrations about the stigma around weight. I agree that people shouldn't be judged on their weight, but the reality is, they are, and i think people like the poem because it says all the things that many people want to say out loud but can't. There's nothing wrong with being honest about the way magazines and models make heavy people feel.

04-29-06, 10:57 PM
Aizlyne, I think you missed the point of the poem. It's not about fat people at all IMO, it's about the opposite - people who diet 'til they're model-thin to be accepted by society.

04-30-06, 05:05 PM
yes cham by being happy with ourselfsss as best we can be an not what others wish us to be fiting in is not about being happy if i dont fit in an iam happy then thats fine with me thanks cham dorm

04-30-06, 05:30 PM
You have the best outlook, Dorm. (0:

Always find a way to be happy with who you are- all of you you are.

If you try to live up to other's expectations, or lay blame on other's that you can not do so, life will perpetually be disappointing.

04-30-06, 08:22 PM
thank you nova for your kind wordsss your right we find to meany things not to be happy about or what get us down true theres enough ofve them but its how you look at it an how you see be alive even with a blesssing or a curessss 1 tree makes a millon matchsss one match can destyoer a millon treees do we given into them who dont understand us an light that 1 match thats the qution ;.)))))) thanks nova hugs dorm