I'm a 32-year-old man, diagnosed Inattentive-ADD about 8 months ago and taking Adderall daily. For the past month, I've been seeing a 29 year-old woman about once a week. We've really hit it off well; lots of common interests and similar outlooks. Plus, she had a friend with Inattentive ADD, and has (so far) been patient with my quirks.

Here's my problem:

I have rarely dated long-term (tons of first dates, fewer second dates, even fewer third dates...), and I have little idea of what's expected, what's to be avoided, etc, etc. I'm looking for some very simple, step-by-step information on dating & romance. I've read a few books on ADD & relationships, but they all lack "Dating 101" info. I'm looking for a crash course to give me a framework for how this relationship might progress. Anyone know any books or websites with that kind of info? Or anything from your personal experience?

Here's my main question: how long is normal to see each other once a week? We're still in a getting-to-know you phase, but I've no idea how long that should last. Two months? Six months? I realize the answer can vary from couple to couple, and that ADD is a wild card, but I am completely clueless.

Thanks for reading and thanks for any help!

i think everyone is different. go with the flow..

I have dated people where in the beginning i saw them every day, and than others less frequently.

Also are these planned activiy dates, or just relaxing doing nothing

Mostly planned activity dates. Why do you ask?

Hello there, I am in a similar boat to you. I am just now trying to start on the dating scene, but I have no idea where to start. I am 29 years old, and finally living on my own.

I have been told numerous times that I have ADD, but it was not until 3 years ago that I believed it. I am also hoping for some advice, especially in regards to online dating.

My biggest problem is that I am going to a college which is practically all male, and my degree does not help either, which is Game Development.

I realize this is not the advice that you are seeking, but I would just go with the flow like the other guy suggested. I am one of the few people on this board that believes ADD is a blessing and not a curse.

I made this realization about two weeks ago when I was hit by a car while riding my bike, and no I am not referring to a motorcycle. I had good enough reflexes that I knew I was going to be hit, but because of ADD I was almost able to dodge a car. The back wheel of my bike is ruined, but I left without a scratch.

Go with what feels right for the both of you. Some people meet, date, and marry within 3 months whiles others it takes years. Just don't be too pushy in the beginning. Being pushy would be like calling her everyday and suggesting you get together all the time. Sometimes a phone call is all that is needed. If you are comfortable going out every week then do so. She will let you know if she is not ready that much togetherness.

I just know one thing...just make sure you let her know you are not just after her for the ...;)

And be honest,but not cruely honest so it hurts,be honest in a nice way,but dont lie, be honest.


be kind!