I'm a 20 year old male who has severely suffered with what I call extreme panic attacks and now agoraphobia, also severe major depression, and I think ADD. Well, it all started in the 4th grade when I was in chapel mass (I went to a catholic school) and we had to read these petitions (like I pray for people with cancer), well I was up by the alter infront of all these people when it was my turn. I started to read and BAM I lost control of my whole body. It was a surreal experience; I was in a seizure like state while I was like out of my body looking at myself. It was so embarassing. From there on I got violent panic attacks from walking down bus asles to getting exams from doctors. My old psychaitrist tried a bunch of things like atarax and antidepressants, which failed. He put me on klonopin, which made me lose touch with reality and I downed the whole bottle. He then put me on Tranxene which made me so tired that all I did was sleep. Next, Valium and that worked so I didn't need it anymore. I was 17 at the time and things were good, I wasn't depressed, I wasn't anxious, it was fun. Little did I know is that it was all still there and I was still depressed, so I developed a cocaine problem. Well thank god I got get bored with things so I stopped that crap. This is where my life died. About 5 weeks before my 19th birthday, I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. I was crushed. EVERYTHING came right back, but 10 times worse. I tried suicide because I was so depressed and anxious that I couldn't stand it. My doc then put me on cymbalta which cured my depression (I take 120mg), and ativan. One day I went to canada to drink (laws are 19) and came back home, got depressed and downed the whole bottle of ativan. I was in a haze, and ran away. It was a mess. So this stupid doctor put me back on klonopin wafers and my life was from what I can barely remember, a haze. It caused really bad amnesia that I went to take one wafer, I took 20mg (yes 20mg). That was the worst day of my life. I stopped seeing this quack who I forgot to mention was against xanax. I started seeing this new guy and I now am on .5mg four times a day. It works, I feel calm and I can do anything except I have agoraphobia from not being treated properly. If I don't take my xanax I can't even talk to my own mother without getting a panic attack. So I don't know what to do, I was scared of getting panic attacks all these years that now I don't go anywhere or do anything. I feel like my life is just ruined. I'm happy and the panic is gone, but the aftermath of it all lingers. I don't know how to fight this agoraphobia. Sorry about the long story, but I needed somewhere to just vent. Thanks for reading.

Hi, I was just wondering how you are doing? I too suffer from Panic attacks but I seem to have a grip on them at this point without any drugs. I do feel it in the background of my mind and it tends to creep up from time to time. I was just curious how you are making out. My son is 8 and I feel he has anxiety too. Of course he is ADHD as well and the doctor has always mentioned putting him on Xanax which I have been resisting.