I went in for my montly visit with my doctor, with whom I have been completely honest and forthcoming and realized she thinks I'm full of crap. I had to see a resident because she was in a meeting and he wanted me to fill out a medication evaluation form but they were locked in her office so he just zeroxed one that was in my record and I looked at the bottom scoring and it said
"unlikely"
in her handwriting on the bottom of both sections (one was for inattentiveness and one was for hyperactivity).
I feel like I've almost been accused of something. I've been stressed out and angry for the past 3 days. Every time my brain has down time that pops into it and I just want to hide under a big ******* rock. I'm quite tempted to just cancel my next appt and go to CHADD meetings instead. The wellbutrin isn't doing much for me (but hey, no side effects). The only advantage to continuing is that I have insomnia pretty bad lately and she prescribed Trazadone for me. But If it means constantly feeling like **** about myself I think I'll pass. I may confront her at the next appt, which isn't for 6weeks, but she is a Captain and I'm just a Sergeant and she obviously thinks I'm full of hot air as it is.
I hate feeling like someone thinks I'm bull****ting them when I am being completely honest. I haven't even told my husband about this, because he only half believes in ADD and ADHD, especially my case because I am am a high functioning adhd-er. I'm just so frustrated.
Oh, and I saw the paper she was writing on and there was unlikely in both spaces again (saw her after I saw the resident) and something else. Now that crap is eating at me too.

Sorry about this Angie....certainly a bummer....not being believed when telling the truth....I would absolutely without a doubt confront her at your next meeting.....I would not just miss the appointment......(besides you may wish to address the fact that the Wellbutrin isn't working)

Perhaps this is all happening for some reason......Hang in there....I'm glad you told us:)

Thanks Joan. I wouldn't just miss the appointment, I would cancel it and send her an email. As for the wellbutrin not working, I have high BP, cant take stimulants at any dose that would be effective and she started me off with Strattera and that had WAY TOO MANY side effects. At any rate just venting helps. I feel kinda bad for the resident, I think he realized too late what he had done. Oh well, he's not the one who wrote it, he just passed it on.

It could be that she doesn't really "get" adult AD/HD.

I agree with Joan about asking her what is meant by the wods "unlikely".

You know, I don't want to deal with the conflict. I'm not a big conflict avoider but I don't want to be "put in my place" by a captain. If it were another sergeant I wouldn't hesitate. And it's true, she might not get or believe in AAdd but she seems to know a lot about it. I don't know.

Angie,

First of all I hope that is all just a misunderstanding. But, one thing to also remember she is NOT your captain. You pay her bill I believe that makes her some how in YOUR employ. And it is your right to seek another professional when trust is lost there will be no progress made.

Hugs and good luck
Cherity

It sounds like Angie is in the military. They probably don't hand out ADD diagnosis readily.

I can sure relate to the situation though.

Yes, it's harder in the military.
I still don't trust her, or anyone, to help me with my adhd, but I do feel she was doing the best she could, and she is higly competent. I'm not sure what I did to lead her to believe I was not truthful, but whatever it is, I didn't lie or do any horse crap on purpose. We met again last week. Both decided that I was better off without medicine and I am coping just fine. The wellbutrin caught up with me and made me have panic attacks. Life was rough for a few weeks. I think I'm going to go back to ignoring the adhd and doing the best I can in life. We all have our crosses to bear. I experience difficulty every day, yet I'm also doing better than 70 percent of my peers, at least. Just gotta live. Thanks Doctor T.
I still don't know what I did make you think "not likely", but I appreciate the journey.
Ang
(this will be my last post on this or any adhd board, at least for a long time ;)