View Full Version : ADD and Office Problems
I have a problem, rather my co-worker has a problem which is annoying me to no end. My co-worker is a junior engineer. He has been just given salery and in return they want him to do more of the engineer work vs the technical work. To accomplish this, he is to work with the senior engineer to learn a few programs and to "learn the ropes". This is the problem:
Every day I hear the senior engineer insult and put down the junior engineer. I hear comments like: Are you even thinking? Figure it out yourself! Are you stupid? Can't you figure out this simple thing?
And to make things worse, the junior engineer is afraid to tell anyone about it. It drives me crazy, I see the senior engineer crippling the junior engineers training and confidence but I'm torn in what to do about it, or if to do anything at all.
What would you do?
02-15-04, 02:04 AM
I think the "wise" course of action would be to stay out of the way... sticking your neck out can only result in your head getting chopped off.
I have never been any good at making the "wise" decision. I would let ALL of the people involved know what I thought of it. :D
A good compromise might be to see if there is some way you can alert the office manager anonymously...
02-15-04, 04:24 AM
I agree with WC...I'm all for the little guy who hasn't found his voice; but, I assume the reason you work is because you NEED your job. Is there any way possible to alert the boss without sticking your neck out? And if not you have to do what is right for you. Hugs and I pray you find the right answer to your dilemma. It show's a good and thoughtful person to worry about another's mental welfare. I admire that.
02-15-04, 11:47 AM
this is where empathy gets us. we feel bad for the underdog so much so that we begin to feel like *we* are the ones getting picked on. o.k., maybe i am projecting how *i* felt in similar situations. but, that reaction seems fairly common among adders.
i think i would pick an option not in you survey. i would make myself available to the junior engineer when he needs to vent. can you guys do lunch together? if you know him well enough and want to share how you would feel if you were in his situation, that might help him open up. and even if he said nothing, he'd *know* that he wasn't overreacting to the senior engineers comments.... you may even find out that your coworker *is* dealing with this in his own way (like by biding his time at the current job while looking for a new job).
another idea is to build up your co-worker whenever you get a chance. find things to comment on that will give his ego a stroke. giving him some self confidence back may help him find his own voice. if you get the chance to compliment him in front of the senior, even better. (i would avoid saying anything to the senior directly about what a great worker the junior is, just let the senior overhear you complimenting the junior).
basically, give your co-worker the power to stop it himself. that in and of itself is a great gift.
you've gotten some *great* ideas from everyone. i hope you are able to find a solution that works for you.
and finally, as always, take what you need from my post and leave the rest. :)
02-15-04, 02:37 PM
Kassie: Just kidding of course -- but how about writing that senior engineer an anonymous letter -- telling him to get a heart, get a conscience, etc. -- and ask him how he would like to be treated the way he is treating the junior engineer??????
Maybe he has no idea what a jerk he really is.......SOMEONE has to be treating HIM this way.....in some other part of his life....or he wouldn't have the ability to treat anyone else this way......
In other words, this senior guy may not have a freaking clue.....:(
P.S. Good luck Kassie.....I know you will do the right thing......You have a good head on your shoulders and a big heart.....:)
By the way -- I am very appreciative of the fact that you ALWAYS come up with very sophisticated, interesting and compelling issues for us to provide you with input, suggestions.....:)
What makes the decision so much harder is that I value an office where one is safe and respected, which most of us do for each other. The senior engineer is rediculously rude and insultive. It makes us techies alittle nervous. As the other CAD person said, we have to keep the senior engineer at arms length.
Its just if only someone would speak up and it can't be me. For even though I did get a raise, I'm still the low man on the totum pole.
02-20-04, 01:11 PM
Kassie: What would be the consequences if you did speak up? Being the "low man" -- does this put you in danger?
02-20-04, 06:16 PM
If it effects you, I would say something. A hostile work environment is bad for everyone and listening to someone be berated is hostile as far as I'm concerned. How is it the office manager doesn't already know? But I guess it might be easy to hide from him/her.
Let us know what happens.
02-21-04, 11:22 AM
Is there just one senior engineer? This guy, while he may be good at engineering, is probably not the best mentor. If you are comfortable doing so, you could suggest to the jr. engineer that he might request another mentor. I think the anonymous notification is a great idea, too.
Then again, maybe the way the junior engineer is being treated is part of the process, like hazing or an attempt to make him tougher in anticipation of increased expectations.
If you are the low man on the totem pole, what do you really have to lose by sticking your neck out? What would you want someone to do for you if you were in his shoes. I think I'd listen to Jiminy Cricket and let my conscience be my guide.
Good luck. You are so sweet for caring about people like you do!