I've been having rather awful panic attacks directly before auditions and during lessons. I have heard about beta blockers and how it minimizes panic attacks.

The idea of not having any performance anxiety symptoms is simply wonderous, but the majority of my attacks are caused by poor self esteem, negative inner voices, which in that case...Beta Blockers will not work. However, People are convinced that with Beta Blockers, won't get tremors, won't have clammy hands, chest won't feel as tight, and breathing won't be as strained...

Wonderful? maybe....the idea of becoming physically dependent on the Beta Blockers scares me.

I don't like the idea of taking drugs for something this trivial. Especially if it's something I can work on getting over in a matter of months...

Unfortunately, I don't have a matter of months. my auditions for numerous Conservatories are coming up early January. I'm not sure if i'll have the time or mental commitment to being able to properly focus/meditate before/during/after a performance. I've attended numerous Performance Anxiety workshops and masterclasses as well as studied The Inner Game of Music, but I seem to have some sort of negative mental block that refuses to let me perform at my best.

Taking Beta Blockers at this point, does not seem like such a bad idea...
Should I? or Shouldn't I??

What are your thoughts and opinions on Beta Blockers?

Interesting thing I noted is I did have mild panic attacks in which I noticed my breathing was odd so I held my breath to avoid people noticing and that just made me nearly pass out. Anyway I took beta blockers a few times when I had to be in a difficult situations (months of total isolation followed by the need to go in public). I never notice them having amazing results but I think the idea that a substance can block the panic attack from happening had a lasting effect. Im very avoidant but I do not panic anymore.

Theres a learned /conditioned response to anxiety/fear that one in theory can
condition to be less stressful. So if a doctor says beta-blockers are OK for you I would not hesitate to use them. Though certainly used them before you need to so your familar with the side effects.