knowing more about your other halve how hes life is and how hes family is and how was school for him what medicines he takes what disability he has and hes school life and how hes parents are and hes brother and hes cousins and aunts and grandma etc? is asking and and knowing to much is that bad?

no, of course not. it's completely natural to want to know everything about your boyfriend.

here's where a problem could arise: if you ask all those questions in a five minute window of time. lol slow down, take a breath.

you'll do this relationship much more good if you shift into low gear. as I say that, I laugh though. I'm the perfect example of HURRY UP HURRY UP HURRY UP. I cannot wait for ANYTHING. Being pregnant is horrendous because I want to hurry up to the next phase. nothing goes fast enough for me and I can't even watch regular tv anymore because unless I've tivo'd it, I can't stand to sit through the commercials.

you want to be past this learning phase of a new relationship and just be in that comfy familiar place. It will get there on it's own time. However, because you're not alone here, if you're in high gear, and he's not, you're going to either annoy the poo out of him, or push him away all together.

Slow down, and pay attention. *hard for adhd I know*. you'll likely find a lot of information by simply listening and without even having to ask.

thanks i appreciate this

Not necessarily good to ask all of it at once.. but over the course of relationships, to strengthen bond and trust.. this stuff has to be discussed

asking to much questions in a relationship of your other halve is that good or bad

It can be annoying if too many questions are asked at one time.

Uh, yeah. Been there...wait...am still there. Even worse when i ask a question then forget i asked it, and ask the same thing again.

Well, honey, of course asking "too many questions" isn't good.

My husband,when he gets in his more manic moods, will bombard me with questions and it's like a dripping faucet. It depletes my mind and spirit. It's like my brain is merely some kind of extension of his, and he can use it however he likes whenever he likes. It's very draining, and in some ways, it's controlling. It's not how he is all the time, it's just when he's feeling like his life is especially out of control. He's trying to feel safe by Managing the Universe, which is a really big job and of course he might want some help from me with that... but I don't WANT to Manage the Universe, I just want to have some quiet time with my own thoughts sometimes. And I am looking for ways to more gently redirect him, with love, and in a timely manner, rather than gritting my teeth and taking it until I COMBUST in response to some innocent but mindless question that he did NOT need to interrupt my thoughts for.

So really, stop and think. TOO MUCH is always bad. And if your everlovin' thinks it's too much... it's too much for HIM. And that matters. And honey, if I may - this might seem intrusive and I hope you take this the way I mean it - you do seem, from reading your other posts and threads, to be rather managerial and controlling. It might be a good exercise for you to step back a bit, and just let things BE. Jealousy, for example, that you referred to in another thread: completely pointless. It repels people and makes you LESS secure. I mean, my husband is a real cutie, and he works in a health care field, which brings him in contact with lots of women; some of them have not been bothered by the fact that he's married, and will stop by "to see how Granny's therapy is going" in their tight, short little tennis dresses on their way to the country club, and find excuses to chat and touch him... come ON. The man has to work. And I can trust him, or I can not trust him. And if I don't trust him, I spend a lot of energy chasing down suspicions and worrying, and it makes me miserable and also LESS safe from any possible infidelity because he will be embarrassed that I'm making such a fool of myself about this and his coworkers are seeing it. And the bottom line is, all I can do is be the best ME I can be and trust that it's enough to hold him. The idea of being jealous about that kind of thing just EXHAUSTS me. Waaaaaaaaay too much work, with essentially NO return. I'd rather do housework, which is saying a LOT.

We al have things to work on in ourselves, and it just happens that jealousy is not on my list of issues, so don't think I'm being judgmental. I have plenty of flaws I bet you could give me perspective on, maybe looking at me andsaying "Now why on earth is she doing THAT? Can't she see how useless that is?" I'm just seeing from the outside that it's not serving you well to push so hard. You're a terrific girl. Give life a little more room to breathe. Let go and let God, or the Universe, or whatever you choose to believe in that might bestow blessings on someone as warm and passionate as you are.

I know exactly how you feel. I am 24 and since being diagnosed it was hard for me to realize that thing that i felt were uniquely me... were actually common ADHD.

GRowing up i heard it all... was called it all... went through it all... and here to tell about it.

One of which is my attention to detail... Im sure most people would agree that woman are into details. We often wonder how man could be satisfied with simple tidbits of information.

Me on the other hand, have to know it all. I cant just know where you went for lunch today on your break. I have to know what you ate, did you get fries? What about to drink? Was the sun shining when you got there? who was working at the time, where did you park?

annoying as it sounds, i cant control it. to the people who love me, they affectionately call it, "the 20 question game."

its all in the details...

advice? dont sweat it... its part of you for better and for worse, the point is to find someone who will see it that way too.

and remember that no one ever got anywhere by asking...

Why as Why?

Why as why, good post I know exactly what your saying! Welcome to the group!