View Full Version : Delusional Matt thinks he can write...

Matt S.
01-23-08, 01:39 PM
I started this thread because I felt inspired to write a nice story, it isn't very good and I really cannot write very well but hey it's worth trying, right?

Matt S.
01-23-08, 01:41 PM
The Rat, The Snake, The Maggot and The Parasite

The snake is an interesting creature. He dwells where he is least expected to strike. He is intuitive, keen, predatory and devious but he is also a trustworthy and loyal creature. He can be likeable and also has some sense of liking to other creatures in the world. His clever ways and intuition is something that when he taps into it can be helpful to other creatures so they can learn from his experience and when he feels like it, he helps the other creatures gain strength from his experience which has been brutal. He is the ultimate survivor and he plays a rather large role in this story.

For a rather extended period of time, the snake decided to befriend the rat and the maggot, both in their own respects both likeable and similar in some ways. They all have to survive in the world that is brutal and tolerate a lot of pain and suffering in the process. At one period of time, the three were great friends, who despite their differences had things in common that they could relate to. Ultimately, as you'll find out later in the story, their nature ended up predominating and the three feel nothing but pure hatred and discontent to one another.

Allow me to start with the maggot. She is unique because she experiences a process of change eventually that changes her into the more vile of creatures, the fly. She is haughty and grandiose. The ultimate hypocrite, she has no issue with her lies and paradoxes. She is a wolf in sheep's clothing and would stop at nothing to eat her way through anything that she can. She started her process of her true nature with the rat, collaborating with the parasite in order to attempt to eat through the rat and contribute to her demise. Ultimately, later in the story she smite the snake on one cheek and proceeded to get smashed on the other.

Let us move on to the rat. The rat is a dedicated creature, trustworthy to the extent to where she is often blind and taken off guard. The rat and the snake since the beginning of time have always had a symbiotic relationship with each other often helping one another by taking advantage of each one's stronger traits. For a period of time they trust each other with each one's darkest secrets. Then the walls start tumbling down when the snake becomes keen to the two faced nature of the rat and ultimately the loss of trust begins the demise of a wonderful relationship. One night in a devious and despicable way the rat in it's cunning and conniving way decided to unleash the snake's true nature and lost that friendship in the process.

The parasite is barely in the snake's radar. Despite a couple of attempts to smite the snake, the snake ultimately lied and conned his way out of the parasite's grasp. The parasite's role in the story is based on his true love for the haughty and grandiose maggot and his attempt to eat his way through the rat. He is merely a bottom feeder and a follower.

It all started when the rat and the maggot were naive to each other's true nature and befriended and supported each other and they were as close as friends could get. When the snake entered the picture, the rat and maggot accepted him with open arms and the three were part of a team based on their similarities. They offered other creatures support and advice and were respected by one another and the other creatures. After awhile, despite communication with both the rat and the maggot, the snake with his keen and predatory senses, noticed that the rat and the maggot weren't the team players that they once were.

In order to confirm his suspicions, the snake preyed on the rat in a very covert way when the rat was the most weak and the rat in confidence told the snake what he thought all along. The unknown fact is that the weak maggot had to recruit her lover, the parasite, and they both had to work hard in order make the rat's life difficult. At this point, the snake remained indifferent, still liking both the rat and the maggot equally because the situation had no real bearing on the selfish snake.

Then one day, the maggot decided to cross the snake by imposing superiority that simply isn't the case. The maggot's fraudulent liking for anyone was fully exposed. The maggot tried to take control of the snake's domain. She then decided to treat the snake as if he wasn't worthy and the snake's initial response to her was planned in a way to gaslight her by tearing down her ego, the maggot's weak spot. She then responded and the snake called upon the wrath of the highest status in order to smash the maggot into the ground.

The snake shared this news with the rat and they became stronger allies having a common hatred for the maggot. While the rat was civil to the maggot after the betrayal the rat was not as devious as the snake when faced with the fluctuating nature of the maggot and the snake acted to the maggot as if they were loyal friends again although the snake ultimately hated her. The rat was aware of this development all along but the vengeful nature of the rat inhibited her ability to do what the snake does.

Throughout this bond and closeness to the rat, the snake increasingly became suspicious of the rat based on her behavior. She seemed to want to get close to the snake and take advantage of his few weaknesses to get to know him better. He knew what was going on and decided to fraudulent act as though he could trust her by confiding a secret here and there. The relationship from the rat's perspective was friendly and content and on the snake's end it was deteriorating and dangerous.

The rat and the snake one night decided to share their battles in life and the abuse they suffered, being the creatures that have a lot in common. That was the night that the rat showed her true colors to the snake and exposed her selfish deviant nature. It is known that rats and snakes have hard lives as animals to which they utilize survival instincts to survive and they are generally left to fend for themselves. The rat however is narcissistic and lacks total empathy although she likes to believe she does have empathy, much unlike the snake who openly admits he has no empathy or conscience. The rat dominated the sharing of experiences and invalidated the snake altogether. He knew this was the moment of opportunity to get out of the grasp of the artificial rat without having to suffer the wrath of this conniving animal's behavior. The rat actually feels guilty so the snake knew that he could end the pain of mistrust by calling the rat on her behavior. The bond between these two ended that night.

The snake can act as if he gets along with the other animals even if he hates them. The snake is also an intelligently devious creature who hoards damaging proof of his interactions with the rat and the maggot in order to avoid the wrath of either one of them if they catch on that the snake is being fake. The snake and the rat made a pact that if their bond were to deteriorate that they would not divulge anything of their interactions, and for safekeeping the snake saved proof of their interactions just in case the rat went against her word. The snake has every intention of being completely fake to the rat as well although he hates her with a passion.

The snake has maturity and like human beings who are mature, he maintains a respectful interaction with those he despises. His lack of conscience and true nature are an advantage there because he can be kind and sweet and not have to resort to the childish nature of revenge. Will the snake strike one who crosses his path the wrong way? Will he strike those who violated pacts that were made in the event of a dissolved bond? Of course he will, but he wants peace among the creatures especially among the former bond, because as much as the three of them hate each other, they help and support other creatures who have similar problems and work well as a team in that support.

Matt S.
01-24-08, 02:01 PM
The Kind and Gentle Soul

It was the first time we met, I looked him in the eyes and thought, "I know you better than you know yourself". I felt a gentle presence when I looked into his blue eyes and emitted this complexity from myself because people always try to get a 'read' on those they first meet. I knew he was the type that was going to get drawn in because his dominant qualities and his inquisitive nature compelled him to want to figure people out. He was unaware of how transparent he was but he was selfless in a lot of ways and didn't have a predatory bone in his body. I picked that up within thirty seconds of meeting him.

People like myself, have a mysterious quality. It is something that cannot be described because I am blithely unaware of how exactly it really works. I just know that people have driven themselves close to insane trying to figure me out and when one is trying so hard that it is bothersome to me, they are rapidly discarded. To me, it feels like people are trying to prey on my weaknesses so that they can subsequently go in for the kill. My upbringing is partially responsible for that, the other half of the responsibility was that I learned to survive in the world that way.

This situation was different though, for some reason I was drawn to his qualities and the fact that he was real and secure as a person showed me that his desire to know me was the only button I could really push. I don't want people to know the real me because I am 'damaged goods' and my spirit was destroyed before I knew what it was. I have no real hopes and dreams and not only do I accept that as a reality, I do not care.

I decided to trust him, as we became better friends to give him a sense of understanding of who I am. I divulged things to him that I have always partially divulged to other people and told him everything. Although he was not judgmental in the slightest bit, his empathy was tearing him apart as if he were taking in my pain. This was where I was lost, I have never felt empathy in my life, I do understand it and display concern for people as if I really do feel it but I don't. I tried to help him shut it down and tried to describe ways to turn it off but I don't really know if it can be turned off.

I felt pathetic and pitied. Although part of me equated that as weakness, I truly understood that this man had true genuine respect for me. His nature and intentions were not predatory. My desire for power and control were strong but I have a limited sense of conscience and didn't personally like the idea of preying on this kind person. It was at this point that I realized that I was preying on him by getting into his head the way I did.

I decided that I needed to tell him this. He was not upset about it at all, in fact he was jealous because he considered it a gift. As I described it in different perspectives, ways that it can be harmful, he understood why I felt guilty about doing it. He still wasn't upset but I told him that I will do my best to take him at face value because from how I see it, it is a total invasion of one's psyche and a sign of a lack of trust.

There is this connection there that enables me to trust him for some reason and trust is so foreign to me that I don't even trust myself. He told me one day during one of my rough moods that he didn't understand how I could be in a bad mood for no reason at all and I made the choice to tell him I have a mental illness and was manic depressive and had a hyperactivity problem as well. That is something that I hide from people because although I have what is considered a 'severe and persistent mental illness', I am someone who shows no signs of it whatsoever. That was the day he looked at me and said, "I don't care, you are my best friend, dude". I knew then that it was a fact from my end as well. I looked at him and said, "you are my first true friend and definitely my best friend".

Matt S.
01-29-08, 11:35 AM
I can hear their breathing.

Always following me.

The footsteps invoke this feeling of fear. It is as if my heart will jump out of my chest. "Just ignore it." But I can't as much as I want to I can't.

Always following me.

I can feel their eyes staring through my walls. They watch me constantly, searching for a weak spot.

Always following me.

I can hear their heartbeats. They will never leave me alone, the seek my demise.

Always following me.

All I can hear is them talking about me, screaming at me. They know everything, things I have told nobody. They suck you into the vortex. How did they know? I never told anybody that. They are spies from the CIA, they admitted it and they say if I step outside I will be killed. Everywhere I go they are following me, screaming at me and they always hide in the shadows.

Always following me.

The doctor says "you are paranoid and manic" and I don't believe it. My ears ring like crazy making this noise I cannot describe. "Florid Psychotic Mania, take this medication it will help". This is real, I know it is. He is in on it too, the machination. He seeks to sedate me because he intends to follow the law.

Always following me.

"Command Hallucinations", he calls it. They are just voices and they are telling you to do things that have no connection with reality. But this is real, I know it is. I will be apprehended if I take these pills. And regardless of what anyone says...

They are always following me.

Matt S.
01-30-08, 12:26 AM
The Rat, The Snake, The Maggot and The Parasite vol. 2

The Killer Bee

Tired of the nature of this childish escapade among the younger rat, snake, maggot and parasite. The Killer Bee drew the line and took complete control. The killer bee has heard all ends of their drama and as distracted by both the tension and melodrama and the behavior the bee is that he decides to establish two main boundaries, Keep it outside the group because I am failing to learn over the banter and do not vent to me because I do not care and do not want to hear it.

The killer bee is an odd one, definitely the quiet one the others need to watch out for. He has a lot of energy, tends to get distracted and has the tendency to go crazy. He is a moody one and the behavior of the children, well not literally but they are all younger than the killer bee, is completely intolerable. It could potentially ruin his status and measured potential because this five person group is 'mandatory' issued from those of the highest standing.

He is ultimately out for himself, but half of the group are basking in their pride and the other half is simply either passive or dramatic. They are all part of the typical college age soap opera, she slept with him, he was drunk and told me this, my life was harder than hers... whaa whaa whaa. Poor little rich kids. But the bee, he doesn't want to hear it or allow his boundaries to be crossed any longer because he has more serious things to worry about.

The bee was wilder at that age, he adopted an appearance that scared people at a young age and isn't as scary or harmful as one would think. He is just serious and dedicated because he understands the importance of a meaningful life and had an extended course of adolescence of his own. If these other animals continue to agitate him by not staying focused on what they all should learn in their group he was chosen randomly to join, they will understand the point of the proverbial sting.

The energy of the group sure will change when the bee goes in and takes over and it will not be tension, it will be dominance, the bee absolutely refuses to suffer a loss when he is the only one who really wants to learn. Of course, the downfall is that if these other animals are not compliant the bee will most likely do the work himself, take credit for the group and not suffer the loss. They will be rough but they will interact and contribute or else the highest order will be notifed by the bee about the situation and will effectively seek immunity from suffering the loss.

*That's a boundary that I will set with the professor, trust me, these punks will not ruin my education... hope you guys liked my metaphor, college is frustrating and I am glad that I found a creative way to vent, had to decide on a plan of action before finishing my incomplete story*

Matt S.
02-01-08, 12:35 AM
The Rat, The Snake, The Maggot and The Parasite vol. 2

Part 1: Recruiting the snake

The snake was essentially the killer bee's first move because he was the dominant one among the creatures. He was slick and conniving seeking to ultimately be in charge and the killer bee tapped into that when he manipulated the snake. If there was anyone in that group who knew how to work the creatures it was the snake.

It was a matter of the killer bee offering to do most of the work and to delegate tasks. Feedback alone was fine enough as long as there was participation and allowing the snake to believe he was in charge was al pert of the bee's master plan.

Through comprimise and the hidden agenda of the bee these other creatures will merely be puppets because the bee will orchestrate the whole fiasco. The snake made it his priority to check back with the bee.

*stay tuned for the part 2*

Matt S.
02-19-08, 07:49 AM
Psychosis and the Holiday caused the delay in my metaphor for the study group, and at this point I am not sure whether or not I will even bother, I will probably forget once the mania levels out, if anyone has been keeping up, which I doubt, then I am sure to say it is a good possibility that I will not continue on in the story. I may???

I will use my head.