Is it commn for ADD/ADHDer's to use speech fillers? My mother is sooo nice
~dripping sarcasm~ I told her that I thought I have ADD, first thing she says is, " if you get treatment, does that mean you will stop saying, "You know" all the time!
I have done this my whole lfe, I don't even know I do it. It happens when I'm high anxiety and have diarrhea of the mouth. She is the only one who points this out and repeats it back when I do it. Tha I can't even talk or start talking really slow. Other speech fillers people use are the words uh, like, ........

might be bc of the uncertainty .. but I think a lot of people use these speech fillers.
When I'm uncertain or cant sort out my thoughts I may do it too.. don't know, actually. I think I just grind to a halt.

hehe - reminds me of a cartoon that I saw some time ago .. this man in a car on a freeway .. he looks at this big billboard with the text: "how many times did your teenage daughter say 'like' in the past hour?" - and underneath that a counter, currently displaying a number in the millions :-)

I hear a lot of people do that anyway.
It'll be better when you feel more certain I think!

Luthien I think you may be right! Low self esteem has always been a problem for me and I do this more at those times. The reason I though it may be because of this disorder is I have been doing this since I was a kid. Jeez I'm middle aged now.

Luthien I think you may be right! Low self esteem has always been a problem for me and I do this more at those times. The reason I though it may be because of this disorder is I have been doing this since I was a kid. Jeez I'm middle aged now.

add can cause low self esteem and anxiety .. so it could indirectly be responsible I suppose!

Because teenagers are typically uncertain too, maybe that's why they do it a lot as well ..

NAH, EVERYBODY, and I mean EVERYBODY uses speech fillers. Trust me, all you have to do is teach one law school writing class where you have to teach people to do oral argument, and you'll become convinced of that. Everyone says "uh," "I think," "I believe," etc. It's something that you have to break people of when they become lawyers. We use these kinds of expressions to soften our opinions and be more socially acceptable. In fact, what I always tell law students is that they have to teach themselves to become utter bores at cocktail parties. They need to be the person who never says, "I think the sky is blue," just, "The sky is blue." Declarations are much harder edged, much more likely to fall flat in a social situation, so we all do it. And you can train yourself not to do it if you really want to.

But then I guarantee that no one will want to talk to you at a cocktail party.... :rolleyes::D

My big speech fillers were always "ummm" and "aaaa". I agree, most people probably due this, not just ADD'ers. My wife for one, says "you know" and "like" all the time (and I'm pretty sure she doesn't have ADHD). To be honest, I don't even think she realizes she is saying it most of the time.

I really think most of these are just habits. It gives you a little time to think about what you are going to say next. And most people think that there should be no "dead air" when they are talking. What I have found is that a small gap in your speech is no big deal. It is not even noticed by others necessarily, even though it feels like an eternity in your head. And even if they notice, it sound much better than "ummm", "aaahhh", "you know", etc.

I started getting much better with this when I started working after school. Part of it was that we used voice mail extensively. I would always listen to my message before I would send it. Hearing your own voice like this really helps. Also, I ended up having to do a lot of speaking for presentations, meetings, sales type stuff. Many times, it seems it is only a matter of practice and comfort level.

Yes, listening to yourself, reading a transcript of yourself, having law school professors say, "Counsellor, I'm not interested in what you THINK. What does the law SAY?" etc. Over time, you learn to accept the space in the conversation and not feel anxious about it. And it's always so stark when you hear law students do oral argument. The ones that have already learned to eliminate the fillers always come across as much more polished, much more convinced of the correctness of their positions, etc.

That said, I think (heh heh) that you want to actually learn to turn them on and off. In social settings it's better to qualify your statements a little. Always speaking in absolutes puts people off.

But the other fillers like ummmm, like, etc. are rarely worth keeping. I use "like" on occasion, mainly as a way of being colloquial (so, mainly just for fun).

The law thing was interesting!
With me its 'sorta thing', and 'its like' the most. I agree with whats been said here - I'd attirbute it to low self esteem and being unsure of yourself. Or simply runnign out of things to say ^^;

People usually use them to buy time while they think through what they want to say. It's like people repeating a question. They don't do it because they're confused. They do it to buy time.

Other people use qualifiers a lot because they want to remain vague, so "sort of," "kind of," etc. are just ways of avoiding a commitment. There's nothing wrong with those if you want to soften a statement's effects. Or, there's sort of nothing wrong with those if you want to soften a statement's effects. Get the idea?

Yeah, I use all these fillers and qualifiers a lot as well. Not nearly as much as I used to. And I've managed to mostly eliminate my nasty habit of using the word 'f___ing' repeatedly and snapping my fingers when trying to think of the next thing I was going to say. :P

If you think of all the people you know, the majority would be doing the same thing. Honestly i don't think its a big deal, i think you're just down on yourself, and no wonder when you're mum seems so keen to point out your so-called flaws.
People just get so critical over the most meaningless stuff. Its not like you're climbing a clock tower with bad intentions. What about your good points?:)

Good points???

Ummm, like, snap fingers, f*$^, sorta', "I think, you know, therefore we are" whatchamccallit, kinda' thingies???

Yes.

http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:XEc2fIdM8AscbM:http://www1.istockphoto.com/file_thumbview_approve/1107726/2/istockphoto_1107726_good_points.jpg (http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www1.istockphoto.com/file_thumbview_approve/1107726/2/istockphoto_1107726_good_points.jpg&imgrefurl=http://deutsch.istockphoto.com/file_closeup/%3Fid%3D1107726%26refnum%3D489619&h=253&w=380&sz=34&hl=en&start=10&um=1&tbnid=XEc2fIdM8AscbM:&tbnh=82&tbnw=123&prev=/images%3Fq%3DGood%2Bpoints%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26rl z%3D1T4SUNA_enUS266US267)

Its not like you're climbing a clock tower with bad intentions.

Ha! What a brilliant way of putting that.

Is it commn for ADD/ADHDer's to use speech fillers? My mother is sooo nice
~dripping sarcasm~ I told her that I thought I have ADD, first thing she says is, " if you get treatment, does that mean you will stop saying, "You know" all the time!
I have done this my whole lfe, I don't even know I do it. It happens when I'm high anxiety and have diarrhea of the mouth. She is the only one who points this out and repeats it back when I do it. Tha I can't even talk or start talking really slow. Other speech fillers people use are the words uh, like, ........
I really dont think this is just an ADD thing. Ill bet if you really listen to your mother she will have some speech fillers of her own that she does not even know she is doing. some do it with words others do it with there hands. It makes us who we are. I say cool beans a lot.