This is something I do, and now with the depression its worse. I can be fine, feeling perfectly happy, than my thought process will go like this........ I forgot to check the dogs water, o.k. do it in the minute, no now its important he's old, gosh he is old, hes not going to live much longer, what will I do, it will be sooooo sad..........then I'm crying :confused: What the hell? I do this all the time. Last night I went to bed and thought about the same thing except with my own death. Like life isn't hard enough, I have to make up sad stuff that might happen.

Also I think I can fix this now that the just general depression has lifted. When it was really bad I should have been hospitalized. I didn't know I was that bad off intil now that I'm better. The fix I believe is CBT(cognative behavioral therapy), if I can do it. Its a chore to monitor my thought process and makes me even more distracted.

Thanks for sharing that. I know you asked a question, and I'm not providing an answer (don't have one) - but I very much identify with what you're describing. I think I'm pretty good about NOT going there though. I AVOID contemplating such things as soon as I'm aware that the conversation (and/or my own conversations with myself) start going there. It limits me, I guess. But I know that I'm too fragile at this point and time in my life to wonder about such sad things. Got too much really sad REALITY going on.

I always wonder about people who seem OBSESSED with contemplating the worst of things. My sister's one of them - and I run away from her fast at family gatherings when she starts up conversations like, "I was just thinking about the Holocaust and what it must be like to ________________" She's so upsetting to be around. It seems to be her purpose in life or something.

Sue

I went through a time when I did that to people. I stopped though or they stopped me. Most of my clan is very outspoken and would just tell me to stop it. This is something I do in my own head that, one thought leads to another and bam......I'm there, with tears running down my face. I'm like, wtf, than I realize I just did that to myself. I 'm trying to figure the first thought that starts it and stop. With the stuff I told others it was about facts, animals abuse, child abuse, world going to hell in a handbag stuff. I am over sensitive to this stuff and can't change it. I guess I really thought the rest of the world needed to really notice too. All it did was make me miserable and I would also pull whoever down.

Oh, I'm so sorry. Thanks again for sharing this new info. It definitely gives me food for thought when viewing my sister. I shouldn't be judging her so negatively. I just always felt as if her GOAL in life was to make me miserable, I never thought that it wasn't ABOUT me. Hmmmmm. . . . . . . .

Well, it's great getting to know you. I appreciate all your posts.

I'll bet there are LOTS of people prone to do the same thing. (Then you've got the wimps like me screaming, "STOP IT!!")


Sue

I am over sensitive to this stuff and can't change it. I guess I really thought the rest of the world needed to really notice too.

I don't know - exactly when and where is over sensitive any way. .. no you can't change it all agreed. I can't make the entire world honest but I can be one more honest person it is - I can only change the small portion that is me - it seems pointless until I realize if the entire world decided to be one more honest person in the world there would be no dishonesty = I am doing all I can. I use honest as not to bring another sad cycle mentioning other things - but the same principle applies

I agree it can be due to depression but for me it can be a screwed way of my mind trying to insect balance - like when these thoughts lead to the fact that I may loose a loved one {two or four legged they are the same for me} yes it seems to begin with a thought and spiral but when I look back over the few days prior I can see where there is an imbalance and I have spent too much time on the computer and not enough playing string with my kitty or time conversing with my husband.

Once I realized some times this is more about an attempt at balance I was able to easily break the cycles by turning off the computer and playing string - in other ward moving to correct the imbalance helps these things for me I do not know if it works the same way for you or not.

I didn't have any problem with depression until recently and it can create a deep sense of black whole {mis-spelling intended } when moods take on a life of their own for me something some where needs to be checked out - presently it is hormones and thyroid because depression is not some thing I normally have. . . . .I think about death some times I wonder all sorts of stuff like the various possibilities but that isn't depression to me - that is simply having a curious mind. . . I mean out mortality is some thing we have to deal with some time or another one way or another

I went through a time when I did that to people. I stopped though or they stopped me. Most of my clan is very outspoken and would just tell me to stop it. This is something I do in my own head that, one thought leads to another and bam......I'm there, with tears running down my face. I'm like, wtf, than I realize I just did that to myself. I 'm trying to figure the first thought that starts it and stop. With the stuff I told others it was about facts, animals abuse, child abuse, world going to hell in a handbag stuff. I am over sensitive to this stuff and can't change it. I guess I really thought the rest of the world needed to really notice too. All it did was make me miserable and I would also pull whoever down.

I can relate to you here! I rarely watch the news on t.v. and just skim the newspaper because frankly it's just too depressing. I have found it important to be involved with some volunteer work when I am able to devote the time to it, to remind myself that there are good people out there who also care about the environment, children, whatever issue you want to work on.

You mentioned going back to therapy (CBT) or are you currently working with someone? I wish you success in this journey. This past winter was really tough on me, I feel so much better now that spring is on its way - not sure if I had a bout of SAD or something else, but I definitely feel for you because I know what it's like to struggle with depression.

Meditation, prayer, exercise ,journaling - these are other things that have helped me in my really down times. That's in addition to therapy and meds.

Take care and I hope you find the right combination of things to help make the skies brighter for you.

I don't know - exactly when and where is over sensitive any way. .. no you can't change it all agreed. I can't make the entire world honest but I can be one more honest person it is - I can only change the small portion that is me - it seems pointless until I realize if the entire world decided to be one more honest person in the world there would be no dishonesty = I am doing all I can. I use honest as not to bring another sad cycle mentioning other things - but the same principle applies

I agree it can be due to depression but for me it can be a screwed way of my mind trying to insect balance - like when these thoughts lead to the fact that I may loose a loved one {two or four legged they are the same for me} yes it seems to begin with a thought and spiral but when I look back over the few days prior I can see where there is an imbalance and I have spent too much time on the computer and not enough playing string with my kitty or time conversing with my husband.

Once I realized some times this is more about an attempt at balance I was able to easily break the cycles by turning off the computer and playing string - in other ward moving to correct the imbalance helps these things for me I do not know if it works the same way for you or not.

Mead you got it for me on the not spending enough time w/ my animals. I have tremendouse guilt over that and a lot of my doom and gloom is because in being depressed its taken from them. I have young ones that need to be played with (example Marty my avitar)

I can relate to you here! I rarely watch the news on t.v. and just skim the newspaper because frankly it's just too depressing. I have found it important to be involved with some volunteer work when I am able to devote the time to it, to remind myself that there are good people out there who also care about the environment, children, whatever issue you want to work on.

You mentioned going back to therapy (CBT) or are you currently working with someone? I wish you success in this journey. This past winter was really tough on me, I feel so much better now that spring is on its way - not sure if I had a bout of SAD or something else, but I definitely feel for you because I know what it's like to struggle with depression.

Meditation, prayer, exercise ,journaling - these are other things that have helped me in my really down times. That's in addition to therapy and meds.

Take care and I hope you find the right combination of things to help make the skies brighter for you.

Thank You, I dont have SAD, but I live in the south. I am not looking forward to summer, the heat and humidity is so draining. When I went to couples counselling, they recommended a meeting for recovery, that I could also go to, that was good for what ever issue also. The group is online to so I will proably start that too. Its free, the face to face meetings are donation only. Its called SMART recovery and it teaches you how to use CBT. You can use it for any addictions or issues.

I very much see where you are coming from texasmissb. I would do quite a lot of the same. In the Marine Corps, I was diagnosed with a dysthymic disorder (chronic depression). That was almost 6 years ago. I just realized I had ADD a few weeks ago. Now I wonder... which caused which. Was I depressed and had a hard time focusing on anything because of the depression, or did my lack of focus create problems that caused the depression. I now believe that I've had ADD my whole life. However I also believe that I've had depression problems for the majority of my life. I suppose it no longer matters. I have these issues, I know about them, and I must fix them to move forward. Good luck to you. You are not alone.

This is one of the latest, well-written articles by pdocs on differential diagnosis/treatment of Depression and ADHD:

http://www.princetoncme.com/pdf/programs/2006-191-1.pdf (http://www.princetoncme.com/pdf/programs/2006-191-1.pdf)

Power Point Slides from the first of those pdocs:

http://www.princetoncme.com/pdf/programs/2006-190.pdf (http://www.princetoncme.com/pdf/programs/2006-190.pdf)

They've got great graphics. Hopefully, they will answer most of your questions :cool:

Also see this thread: http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=50605

Good luck fellow travelers! :cool:

This is one of the latest, well-written articles by pdocs on differential diagnosis/treatment of Depression and ADHD:

http://www.princetoncme.com/pdf/programs/2006-191-1.pdf (http://www.princetoncme.com/pdf/programs/2006-191-1.pdf)

Power Point Slides from the first of those pdocs:

http://www.princetoncme.com/pdf/programs/2006-190.pdf (http://www.princetoncme.com/pdf/programs/2006-190.pdf)

They've got great graphics. Hopefully, they will answer most of your questions :cool:

Also see this thread: http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=50605

Good luck fellow travelers! :cool:


You know, In the first link it gives a lot of statistics. One being that more women suffer depression (makes since, horomone fluctuations), that the onset is usually about 32 (thats the age I think when people loose the magical thinking, that they still have their whole life in front of them) but this and everything I've read sugest that ADHD is very common in children but not adults. IMHO, I find this hard to believe, it doesnt just go away does it? I really believe in my own case I was just destined to become worse if I didnt know what it was. Knowing you have these problems but not knowing what it is and the fall out from being treated badly because your annoying makes a person worse. I guess maybe it has to do with the times too. Its a newer disorder and more accepted now. Thanks, addaway as usual great links!

Based on the info from your other posts, i tend to think your 'mood issues' are trauma-based.

Unresolved trauma causes memory and attention and mood/anxiety issues. Even very old stuff can continue to play out in its effects today. (Esp. if the whole family has 'stayed sick'.)

I learned a lot about this at a 12-week day hospital program for survivors that I attended in 2006.

Oh..it looks like mood disorder. Mood Disorders include Major Depression, Dysthymia (Chronic low-level depression) and Bipolar Disorder (Manic Depressive Disorder.) These are present in many individuals with AD/HD. Usually, depression starts later than the first onset of the AD/HD. There has been some debate about the incidence of Bipolar Disorder in individuals with AD/HD. Some might say that rapid mood shifts and frequent irritability are characteristics of AD/HD. Others diagnose a rapid cycling mood disorder. Recurrent major depression is more common in adults with ADHD than in non-ADHD adults. However, one must also be aware that depression can be a side effect of stimulants and several other medications. Because stimulants have been known to exacerbate depression and mania, one should usually treat the mood disorder before treating the AD/HD.

You all were right! ADD and mood disorder.

Based on the info from your other posts, i tend to think your 'mood issues' are trauma-based.

Unresolved trauma causes memory and attention and mood/anxiety issues. Even very old stuff can continue to play out in its effects today. (Esp. if the whole family has 'stayed sick'.)

I learned a lot about this at a 12-week day hospital program for survivors that I attended in 2006.


I agree, I kept asking him about PTSD and couldn't go into the reasons I would have that is it would have takin to long. But I briefly told him some of the recent stuff that really affected me and he seemed to rule it out based on I don't have flashbacks. I dont think I made myself understood though. I have nightmares about stuff that did happen or simialer happenings. I stay in a very watchful constantly aware of my surroundings state. Anytime there is conflict I am over reactive in my mind of doom that may happen. Ex: Bf sales a piece of equipment on Ebay, buyer (who is some freak) insist on using his own trucking co. to pick it up, company picks item up, bf takes pics again when truck is here, equipment leaves, buyer gets it and its missing main part, trucking co, lost it, buyer files claim but also threatens bf???, this isnt the first Ebay nut we have dealt with, he claims bf didn't send it, personally I know its sent because I saw it get loaded on truck. Anyway, buyer makes phone threats, says he is going to come and "see bf", he lives in another state, than he calls from motel 40 mins from here, I realize he may have used spoof card but who knows, I than worry, I worry he will kill are injure my horses in the pasture, or just show up and start shooting, so I hyper viligiantly watch, I watch my dogs to see if they scensing something, I watch the road, I dont shower that day (because I need to hear, remember the movie Pscho), I dont sit in front of the window (driveby shootings). Boyfriend goes around making jokes about hillbilly thats coming to see him. I'm like its not funny, some people are absolutly crazy and you may be the last straw that stirs them up. He thinks I'm crazy for over reacting but because of my poor choices and just some tragic events, I feel like I have to. This is an example, stuff like this happens probably weekly, yesterday it was a conforrtation with a person that drives by our house (we live on dirt road) going 70mph, BF told him off so now I'm worried about that because this person is a local crack addict.
Because of my past I don't ever feel completely safe. I mask this with anger and covertly watching and listening when I think there may be danger. In my perception its warrented and I dont understand how others dont see the threat. But coversly sp? I will do dare devil actions like riding ATV full throttle not knowing what is around the corner w/ no helmet :confused:. I also will go to the store late at night in the crappy part of town (its the only one open by myself) and I feel safe doing that. Then there are times when my anxity gets the best of me at night and I become fearful that someone will break in and I listen to every little noise in the house. I am now rethinking taking the sleeping pills because I dont want to be knocked out and something happens. I was sound to sleep and my house burned down, I went out the window. I fill like I almost didnt wake up because of the smoke. This is one of my traumas that I see would make me this way and Im o.k. that I'm this way because its understandable. But since I know this it seems that I would know that its likely that would stop behavior that really does no good. I'm going to talk to a therapist since the PDOC doesn't do any talk therapy. They will be able to probably put it all together where I will have more of a plan. It also will be nice to get it all out to someone whos doesnt know me and its their job to listen.

texasmissb,
You are not alone in the way you feel. I get caught up in those thought processes too.
Things being bad and getting carried away with the chain reaction thinking.
I too suffer from depression. It really affects my relationships and then turns into the "self fulfilling prophecy" thing.

For a long time I thought my depression was trauma induced. I did see several counselors over several years. None could seem to unlock the mystery.
I feel it is not likely anymore.

Then when I got my ADD diagnosis it seems to me that even though there is a sense of relief I still feel like it does not quite hit the nail on the head.

Then I go into the spiral of if it is not ADD then what is it? I am just crazy? Was I dropped as a child? Am I just a defective human? Maybe I am the cause of all the problems in my life? Kind of what you have been talking about here taking one thought and then running with it?

Anyway, I think I get where you are coming from and I really appreciate that you wrote about that way you feel.