Background: assessed January Adult ADD low attentive type, and depressed, by a psychologist. Prescribed Adderall 20mg XR and 10mg 'as needed' in the afternoon by my general MD who was not comfortable with psychiatric drugs but went ahead. I was also taking Chantix the nicotine-receptor-blocking drug to quit smoking since last October (have not smoked since 11/28/07)

First 2 weeks - WOW great, didn't snap at my kids, could attend to everything calmly in my chaotic household with three kids (12,9,2).
Did not, however, help me with being focused - in fact, this seemed to get WAY worse where I would run off into whatever idea I had at the moment and never get back to any kind of "to do" list I had for the day.
Stopped sleeping, stopped eating. Started seeking a pdoc for dosing or med change.

NOTE: Psychologist has known me for 30 years and has been treating my son for the last 7 years. He says "let's try to correct the ADD first and then if you are still depressed, we can see about treating that."

2 months: disaster strikes my home and many stressful events combined in a 5-day period and I lost it. I also took myself off Adderall and Chantix on Day3 partly so I could get a good night's sleep. Had arguments with people, and 3 panic attacks in one week and ended up hospitalized for a couple days.

Monday
Saw a new pdoc. Self-reported symptoms in a 1 hour period while my father was also with me. She says Oh you sound bipolar, and describes that. She says I have racing thoughts and pressured speech.
Let's try you on Depakote.
I say well what about my psych says we should really work on the ADD first. She says Oh well this might really help you with some of those symptoms.

I come home and do research. I DO NOT LIKE THIS AT ALL. I am not comfortable with this. It doesn't fit - the mania or hypomania... that is not what I experience.
Pressured speech? That is because I am trying to tell her everything I think is relevant, and since I don't always know which details are relevant, I am trying to give a picture, and I am still adjusting to Adderall.
Racing thoughts, I didn't know what they were according to the DSM (?) , no I don't have that after all.

My psych... and many other people in my 'world of recovery' (mainly AA) - we all believe that while you have the degree, I can feel what fits for me and what doesn't. I really do not like when someone just disregards that or worse:
is NONCHALANT about "hey let's try this drug" !!!!!!!!!!!

We are not choosing f****ing wallpaper colors here!

UGH!

So I have been trying to get into another doc while maintaining on 10mg 2-3 times a day so I don't lose my mind and end up in the hosp again. But focus is still not even there. I feel sort of depressed and overwhelmed with everything, and I don't have any motivation (how's that for mania? yeah right)

I WOULD LOVE ANY FEEDBACK or understanding or anything.

I feel SO ALONE with all of it.

Hi Your not alone and I'm pondering over your post. Just wanted you to know that while I write the longer one!

Background: assessed January Adult ADD low attentive type, and depressed, by a psychologist. Prescribed Adderall 20mg XR and 10mg 'as needed' in the afternoon by my general MD who was not comfortable with psychiatric drugs but went ahead. I was also taking Chantix the nicotine-receptor-blocking drug to quit smoking since last October (have not smoked since 11/28/07)

First 2 weeks - WOW great, didn't snap at my kids, could attend to everything calmly in my chaotic household with three kids (12,9,2).
Did not, however, help me with being focused - in fact, this seemed to get WAY worse where I would run off into whatever idea I had at the moment and never get back to any kind of "to do" list I had for the day.
Stopped sleeping, stopped eating. Started seeking a pdoc for dosing or med change.

NOTE: Psychologist has known me for 30 years and has been treating my son for the last 7 years. He says "let's try to correct the ADD first and then if you are still depressed, we can see about treating that."

2 months: disaster strikes my home and many stressful events combined in a 5-day period and I lost it. I also took myself off Adderall and Chantix on Day3 partly so I could get a good night's sleep. Had arguments with people, and 3 panic attacks in one week and ended up hospitalized for a couple days.

Monday
Saw a new pdoc. Self-reported symptoms in a 1 hour period while my father was also with me. She says Oh you sound bipolar, and describes that. She says I have racing thoughts and pressured speech.
Let's try you on Depakote.
I say well what about my psych says we should really work on the ADD first. She says Oh well this might really help you with some of those symptoms.

I come home and do research. I DO NOT LIKE THIS AT ALL. I am not comfortable with this. It doesn't fit - the mania or hypomania... that is not what I experience.
Pressured speech? That is because I am trying to tell her everything I think is relevant, and since I don't always know which details are relevant, I am trying to give a picture, and I am still adjusting to Adderall.
Racing thoughts, I didn't know what they were according to the DSM (?) , no I don't have that after all.

My psych... and many other people in my 'world of recovery' (mainly AA) - we all believe that while you have the degree, I can feel what fits for me and what doesn't. I really do not like when someone just disregards that or worse:
is NONCHALANT about "hey let's try this drug" !!!!!!!!!!!

We are not choosing f****ing wallpaper colors here!

UGH!

So I have been trying to get into another doc while maintaining on 10mg 2-3 times a day so I don't lose my mind and end up in the hosp again. But focus is still not even there. I feel sort of depressed and overwhelmed with everything, and I don't have any motivation (how's that for mania? yeah right)

I WOULD LOVE ANY FEEDBACK or understanding or anything.

I feel SO ALONE with all of it.


I think when your adjusting to a new med and then taken off of it and given another right away, and also have some trauma come in your life, all of this will mimick symptoms of BPD. We were just discussing this in another thread. If you really dont feel right about her diagnosis and that she really "heard" you I would find a new doc. If you go to a new one and they tell you the same then maybe you need to go along with them. IMO I think that we have some intuition into what we need and what feels wrong. I can see where you would have pressured speech in trying to explain yourself in the appointment time. I felt that way, it like I dont have enough time to tell him all and if I only get out half my symptoms I may get half a diagnosis.

Here is the other thread that relates.
http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=51106

You have been on Chantix sense October?


Bipolar and ADD can not only look a lot alike they can travel together.

I have been diagnosed bipolar when I am really just hyperactive ADD - my bipolar sister was diagnosed ADD while bepolar missed for decades.