The structure of my life has been off track over the past two months and now that there is calm after the storm I can't figure out how to get back on track and doing the things I should be doing, like paying off me debt, going to the gym, etc.

First, I moved. That changed my entire routine because I live with different people. I have to accomodate them. My roommates are super duper organized and I have to work real hard to keep up with them. I can't leave messes all over the place like I used to. I have a longer commute to work, etc. Everything is different.

Second, I spent the past month going back and forth between the hospital because my boyfriend's mother was dying. Instead of the normal routine, I was driving to the hospital and doing favors for the family. I work in healthcare and after this experience I have lost all my desire to go to work.

There is nothing out of the ordinary going on now, but because my routine was disrupted for so long, I can't seem to get back into it. I am back to eating take out, spending money that I don't have, and driving around aimlessly. I just don't know how to get back in the swing of things.

Any advice?

wizephoenix I always begin with a simple question. "What can I do?" If I'm a long way down this road, maybe all I can do is dishes... but whatever it is I find a starting point and begin. If I'm right off the rails I might have to start really really small.

Making a start where I can actually get through the task is key. It just makes me feel worse if I can't even do what I thought was a simple task. I have learnt to start really really small.. and build on those successes. Eventually I get hooked up again and it takes off.

Physical exercise is a good thing for me too. Helps to keep my emotions a bit more robust.

Hope this helps. Ian. :)

wizephoenix, I wish I could offer some advice but I'm in that mode right now also !

My Grandmother past way just before Christmas and with going back and forth to the hospital, cleaning out her house and being forced to take many of her things to my small house, fighting with my brother and sister (we where her only grandchildren) and just palin dealing with the lose of a person who was special to me along with my other daily stuff has thrown me off track in a big way !!!!! :sad:

I did wake up this morning with the goal to clean up and get on track. I have an incentive, we're leaving in 10 days for a 6 day vacation to Florida (thanks to my grandmother ) I don't want to come home to a mess. So today I'm going to throw in my Linkin Park CD have all my Head Banging CDs ready for a long day of cleaning.... :D

If any of you see me here today......... tell me to get off line and go finish my work.....

I'm sorry, I wish I could be more help to you........

Paula

I hear ya. I can get thrown off ridiculously easily. Just this week, my dh went on a business trip, and that threw things off for me. I'm still not sure why... he works such long hours during the week that I manage most of the household stuff myself anyway. A series of disruptions like yours would probably throw me into a tizzy. ;) I agree with Ian about taking things a step at a time. Try not to be too hard on yourself; getting back into a routine is hard for us!

There is nothing quite like a little head banging to get the cleaning groove on.. heh so true fasttalkingmom

I didn't stay on track today but I did get some thing done...

With Linkin Park blaring from my CD player I cleared my kitchen to give the floor a good scrubbing....

Noticed an area that needed some attention, old paper and stuff, so I worked on that for a bit...

Got the bucket filled it with water and soap for the floor grabed the sponge mop and found it all torn up ! .....

Ok, well, I was going to go to Walmart later in the day, so I'll go now,so I can also get a new mop....

I'll bet anyone here can guess what happened.... go ahead, lets see how well you know your ADDer......

Hi wizephoenix,

I'm probably the worst around here...
The structure of MY life has been off track over the past TWO YEARS! Don't feel bad.

I'm still NOT working, although I SHOULD be.
I've stagnated, and I'm paying the price for all this sabotaging.

This is what I get for being non-functional: eviction notices and a BF who threatens to kick me out when money gets tight.

Now he's warning me this time that if i don't work before May 31st when the lease is up, he's closing the apartment.

Now I'm feeling the tension of having to shed the 'stress pounds' I put on in the past month, get back to dancing (after 2 years!) & start a whole new daily routine....budget....FAST!
Not to mention that I am rather tense about my living conditions.

do what you can but do it.. it can get better. Your dance should help.
Good luck and careful planning.
Cheers! Ian.

the journey of 1000 miles begins with one step.

be willing to take 1st step. keep stepping,.

you can do it 1 step at a time.

:)

What everybody else said seems very helpful and logical to me.

When I read your post, I immediatley thought "New place, new people, new routine." Your old way of doing things may not work now, here, with them. I love routines, I'd hate to think where I'd be without them. Every now and then they need shaking up. You can't let your routines get too, ahem, routine. You can't let yourself become a slave to them. Routines are for alleviating stress, trying to fit one in were it doesn't will surely cause you more stress.

Just my two cents. Best of luck to you!

WHOA! You're dealing with a lot of stuff.

If you're working, do you have the funds to support some work with a coach? It sounds like you need someone to help you put another supportive structure in place. (Remember the "two heads" axiom - I strongly believe in that, particularly when I think there's a possibility I might be too close to the situation I'm dealing with.)

Secondly, stop ONE destructive thing. If it were me, I don't know when you do your aimless driving around (I used to do my aimless bookstore cruising after work), but is there a way to go home, do the "organizing" chores (YECH) to keep up w/your mates so they won't be hanging over your head like the Sword of Damocles, and THEN go out and do your aimless driving around as a decompressor reward?

Just a suggestion for a start. You are dealing with a lot and I empathize. I came home yesterday for a very organized and challenging day and tried to clean up some messes that had been hanging over my head for some months, only to end up doing NOTHING b/c I didn't have enough mental or physical stamina in reserve. What that told me was that I need to keep building it up. I'm right there with you. Hang in there.