Do you find that authority figures - - more specifically, people who you see regularly like supervisors at work, teachers, etc -- misinterpret some of your ADD symptoms as insubordination?

I have a supervisor at work like that, and I'm not sure how to explain that when I make a mistake, or have a spontaneous moment, or get distracted or side-tracked, it is not a deliberate "challenge" to her authority.

Suggestions?

I don't have any suggestions that I feel so confident about that I'd recommend them. However - I would like to share that (IMO from personal experience and from articles I have read) a good number of individuals who get supervisor positions are actually some of the WORST people to be in such postions. They are insecure, bully-ish, aggressive, etc. Supervisors (unfortunately & ironically) often don't have very good "people skills."

Again - this is only my opinion, which I shared just in CASE you start questioning whether or not your supervisor is actually someone any human being could work with.

And I'm sure it'll come as no suprise that my last work experience was very negative due to some behaviors of my supervisor at that job.

Best wishes,
Sue

In my long experience with many bosses and supervisors I've found that many are highly insecure and respond badly to any perceived challenge to their authority.

This can manifest itself in being unable to handle their subordinates behaving as anything other than automata. It's as if any tiny issue could be the start of a terrifying chain of events leading to the supervisor losing control... and losing face.

Not a good place for an ADDer to be

kilt

That pretty much describes the situation with my supervisor. I've actually been told that she feels I am trying to take her job.

The funny thing about it is, I'm shy and introverted and generally non-confrontational so I'd be the last person to actively "go after" another person's job. Even in school, I was never a trouble-maker - just quiet and tried to do what was asked of me.

I've thought about being a real smart-*** and suggesting that she seek out the company-provided counselling services so that she can work through her own insecurities. . .but I might wait until I have another job lined up before I do that.:rolleyes:

~Audrey

Luckily for me I have moved past insubordination and I am on to pure anarchy!

Luckily for me I have moved past insubordination and I am on to pure anarchy!

LOL - I like that idea.

yep.

also I find that since I dislike confrontation, I also dislike "bosses" because they will confront me about things. I dislike the confrontations so much that it carries over to disliking them as people, and not listening to them. I've been like this since I was a kid, I was like this with my parents as well.

Not all supervisors are bad, and not all employees are insubordinate..
The challenge of the work place is to feel a connection between you and your superior. Almost always the employee is on the defense, assuming noone understands their opinon or even cares, so in turn you are more likely to over react to lifes daily challenges.
As dificult as it may seem..trying to go with the flow until, you reach a good working relationship is the key..your opinions at this point will be worth a lot more.
Any person, can have bad days, and feel singled out..just try to count to ten, and remember, think before you speak..then speak if you must.
It's a game...trust me...A GAME!

I must say..many supervisors in my career...have been very skilled bullies, and I learned a lot..I learned when to react, and when not...its truly a game..

I had one person tell me once that i thought I was a princess, and it infuriated me, so I replied "well, I am" in my fathers eye. you can imagine the reaction....suspended!
So you see, if I had just walked away...maybe i could have confronted her at a later date, with rational thinking.

With age comes the ability to hold ones tongue. Just give yourself time..and count to ten.

With age comes the ability to hold ones tongue. Just give yourself time..and count to ten.

I thought age brought indifference - which is pretty much where I am

I listen enough to know what they want - I hear what I need to hear - if it isn't useful then I dismiss it - their emotional problems aren't mine and frankly I would much prefer they keep their problems to them selves

If a supervisor half *** tries to be human then I will play the game as described above however when they become pushy I begin to let them know just how emotionally apathetic I truly am In the case of bullies it is best I stay indifferent because pushing beyond that is never a good thing - the smart bullies figure that out pretty quickly and find other prey

Some supervisors I get along fine with - the ones who are human and come with typical human flaws I can co-exist with the bullies are not so fortunate - as a youngster I learned to play the game really well - I prefer not to go there but I can. . . . I have decent boundaries and I am well aware of when the line has been crossed.

I have no problems bouncing folks back on their side of the little white line and I feel nothing special while doing it - apparently this is intimidating to some which is fine as long as they get it and leave me alone to do my job. I put up with moronic crap for decades until my children moved out on their own.

Presently I no longer have bosses but partners, competition and allies. I am impatient by nature thus eliminating the middle man called an employer. . . . .

A friend of mine. Who was about 5 years older than me at the time. I was 19. He was a very confident guy. He had a good job and no reason to be intimidated by me. It was weird though one day. He asked where we should go to lunch or something like that. I said I didn't care. He got ****ed off he told me why I have to act like a tough guy all the time. I think he was really serious. I couldn't believe how my indecisiveness could be interpreted as being "tough". It is wierd how the most seemingly secure people can be so insecure.

I've actually been told that she feels I am trying to take her job.

i've been in this situation a few times. one in particular caused tension. i spoke with her about it. i told her that my intention wasn't to step on anyone's toes and i'm a person who is forward with my ideas and suggestions. if it works, great. if it doesn't, that's fine .. but i'm not going to keep them to myself if i think it'll be helpful to the task at hand. she was ok with it. there was still a bit of tension by the end of the year and that's fine. im not about to change who i am. if we're having a staff meeting .. im part of the staff. if my coworkers don't feel comfortable in sharing their ideas, it doesn't mean i can't.

as for you, why don't you tell her you have ADD so she's not taking your actions personally?

I always have serious problems with any kind of authority figure. I usually think I know everything better than them anyway, and sometimes that may even be true. How irritating and arrogant can you get!
So I've learned to keep most of those opinions to myself resorting instead to using the voice of reason(TM) or, just as likely, to a sultry brooding silence.