I would say "again" but it is really a "still".
Readers digest condensed:
I work for a state agency, doing what is most likely the worst job anyone with ADD could possibly do (lots of detailed paperwork and correspondence, no room for error). I have tried my very best to keep up/be normal and did a pretty good job of faking it up until about a month ago. People are starting to look at me sideways and I even overheard my boss asking a coworker if I had brain damage. The other person suggested I must have been dropped on my head as a child. She went on to say "She is such a sweet, creative person but she is just not getting things, and she makes the most ridiculous mistakes."

I am afraid I am going to walk into work to be handed my walking papers tomorrow.

Add this to the fact that I make next to nothing as it is, and getting fired will probably be the end of my relationship with my extremely wonderful boyfriend who is at the end of his rope with my problems maintaining. I am constantly late for work, oversleep, (no matter that I have 3 alarm clocks, I just get up and turn them all off and lay back down) zone out at work, forget to do things that should be routine by now, and make serious errors that make me want to cry when I see them- I do my work 3x over and still make errors.

I am not a stupid person, and this is making me insane.

I have gone through Voc Rehab in an attempt to get some counseling/meds for cheap, b/c I have not the money for regular doctors. It has taken 12 weeks and I just now got an appt. with a psych, only to be given cognitive tests that didn't make any sense to me. I KNOW I have ADD, have been diagnosed before but as I had no money I couldn't pursue further treatment. The dr. who diagnosed me has since moved out of state and took his patient's records with him. The voc rehab psych didn't seem to know anything about ADD or why I was there, and he treated me like I was mentally retarded.

I am at the absolute, frayed, burning end of my tether.

Any suggestions would be appreciated more than water in the Sahara.

If you are convinced you are fixing to lose your job I would be putting in applications - it sounds like the job sucks any way.

I am unable to tell by your post why your boyfriend would break up with you over loosing a job - if that is all it takes then the relationship is not going to make to through all the wonders of aging, like forgetfulness, chronic illness and pain - so why waste your best years there. Please do note this suggestion is based upon a single sentence .

Well, we have been dating for 2 years and I have gone through 8 jobs. :(

Hello toosensitive! I have been there, and I feel your pain, honestly.

I also work for a state agency...at least in that I work for a private non-profit contracted by one. It gets harder and harder to keep up and make sure I am doing with I need to do.

A diagnosis is one thing, treatment is another. Treatment can help a LOT, and both give you recurse for putting in with HR for reasonable accomodation. Not to make excuses, but to gain time in order to get things straightened out.

Also, people should not be talking about you in that way. I guess we cannot force people to have different opinions, but they should not be discussing your professional life in such a manner at all, especially where others can hear it.

Do you have a union rep you can trust, who could help you figure out a solution to some of this? Someone who might be able to help you push paperwork through so you can get the help you need?

Maybe there are other solutions..I hope someone comes online with a few more ideas! In the meantime, know that others have been there, and there is a way out of it all. Keep posting, we are here to help!

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply..Unfortunately I live in SC, which is a right-to-work state. No unions. And that means they can fire you at any time for any reason, and they don’t even have to tell you why. It’s a good-ol’-boy system, as well.
I am between a rock and an incredibly hard place right now!

Ugh. Unions are not always great, but they can be handy. Hearing that they can let you go at any time for any (or no) reason makes me shudder...that's just awful.

There are state and regional forums on here, so maybe another member from SC can help? In the meantime, I would look for your former doc and try to get your records, especially if it will help speed things along. I think it's a federal law that the former doc has to give you access to your old records (although I am not positive about that.)

Whatever you can do to stay calm will help. Stressing always makes me worse, and this is one situaiton where stress would be a big issue!

Keep talking, it can really help. What have you tried already? Do you have any supports you can contact, like local groups for folks with ADD?

Not to be the little cartoon character that walks around with a rain cloud following her, but there are absolutely no resources in this city for adults with ADD. I cannot be the only one with this issue, and it really drives me crazy sometimes.

The closest place is Atlanta. That is almost a four hour drive, not worth it in gas/stress.

I have checked the sticky for SC and I think I am the only person on this forum who lives here- I could be wrong now. Perhaps I should start a new thread asking if anyone else lives in Columbia, SC.

:P

Start that thread! You never know who is going to turn up, looking for help OR who has found it and wants to let others know.


Not to be the little cartoon character that walks around with a rain cloud following her, but there are absolutely no resources in this city for adults with ADD. I cannot be the only one with this issue, and it really drives me crazy sometimes.

The closest place is Atlanta. That is almost a four hour drive, not worth it in gas/stress.

I have checked the sticky for SC and I think I am the only person on this forum who lives here- I could be wrong now. Perhaps I should start a new thread asking if anyone else lives in Columbia, SC.

:P

Big ((((HUGS))))

I'm in SC, my doc's in North Charleston, hubby's is in Charleston (specialist in addiction).

I have to agree that there are limited resources for those with adult ADD, particularly for those without insurance or money. (I wonder if that would be a contributing factor in our extremely high incidence of meth labs and meth abuse??)

The cognitive tests help the p-doc to rule out or in other stuff (depression) usually.

You say you work for a state agency, have you spoken to your human resources officer?? I can't advise you either way as to do so, as you are the only one who knows whether they would be open to "the possibility that you have a disorder" when you don't have a diagnosis yet. Or if they would possibly fire you before diagnosis, because then they wouldn't have to deal with an employee who would be covered by the disabilities act, once you were diagnosed.

I feel for you. Let us know how things go.

The system, might help to blame the system.

I'm trialing this approach in an attempt to quit blaming myself!

You should hunt your dr. down who diagnosed you. You have an absolute right to your private health information.

Totally feel your pain. Worked as a case manager for people with mental retardation/mental illness and went to work feeling sick to my stomach every day. Why do we waste our lives on these jobs that suck the life out of us? I say, look for another job asap, one that might possibly have some room for your strengths and minimize your weaknesses. Once you get your records, you may want to consider letting your HR person know like the pp said. They'll have to make reasonable accomodations -- whatever that might be -- but even more, they'll be slightly more hesitant to fire you.

Anyway, if you get fired at least you can get unemployment benefits.

Maybe you've had so many jobs because they all sucked.

It's not your fault your brain is wired a little loopy, and you will find something that works for you. If all else fails, move up here to NC. I have a rocking good psych nurse who actually believed me about the ADD.

PS, about the people who think you might have been dropped on your head -- I might wonder if they suffer from RBJ syndrome (aka really big jerk syndrome). I hear it's incurable :)

I dont have much advise for you ... I am trying to figure it all out myself. I just wanted to say that I live in Greenville SC. I also dont know of any resources but wish there were.....