View Full Version : Nicholai's random crap

10-23-08, 04:42 AM
To rely upon the connection that would take me I was once lost I though I was found only being driven gently to the ground When I was buried panic filled me what do I do when the motion ceases finding myself trapped I had been coddled to the depths fearing the loss of what got me there

Knocked down as my bravery left me a childish fear of making my own way without someone to hold me when i should be fighting The blow struck me down with ease as if I wanted to fall Without self worth I was left defensles without confidence i was helpless Words wounded me and thought nearly killed me I wrote my own downfall by not finding myself before another.

cold as stone gray as winter

Breeding hopes with empty wishes or desires will take us no further than the value of the words of a wandering salesman planting seeds without soil or a house without a foundation a sky without a beginning or end only a cold empty space treading along to maintain a path without direction.

without your love I might have died, with your love I almost lived

When I asked it was courtesy not submission I was weak easilly swayed conveniently subverted Self convincing acceptance wrought by a lack of sensation when i was alone I was one but with you I was without myself But without choice where is life? I cannot accept a lack of decision I drifted with your currents but now I must row against them reach the shoreline set my feet on sandy ground stand without need of a helping hand

If I were leaving I would take my coat forget my shoes and keep my words. I left with such cowardice, no confrontation only escape it's what I've always done

I thought rock bottom was just a place
Better to have love and be loved than to be stripped of it. Better to be lost than to love and lose it to lie down and accept defeat lying down became a standing posture my dreams became life and my life a forgotten dream