View Full Version : Help! I'm too depressed to enjoy my ADHD!


A1A5KA
12-06-08, 09:20 AM
Hi everybody,


Since this is my first post on this forum, I should probably introduce myself. My name is Amy, I’m 37 years old, single, never married, no kids. I live in Alaska and I’m currently a full-time college student.

I’ve been treated for depression on and off for years, but I was only diagnosed with ADHD two years ago. The actual diagnosis is for ADHD-Combined Type and I can see that since I do sometimes get hyper and impulsive, especially verbally, but in general I am much more inattentive than hyperactive.


As for treatment, currently I see a psychiatrist once a month and I am taking 15 mgs of Dexedrine and 20 mg of Lexapro per day. I also have access to services through my school’s resource center.

I go to a REALLY small school, our Counseling Center has one Psychologist, who is also the Director of Disability Services. The last few semesters, she saw me almost every week until she finally convinced me first to get tested for ADHD and then, when I was diagnosed, to actually try medication.

This semester, I saw her twice at the beginning of the semester to get accommodations set up for my classes but I haven’t seen her since. Instead, I’ve been meeting about once a week with one of her interns, a psychology grad student who has some training in ADD coaching.


On the ADD side of things it’s going pretty well. I’ve found that for the most part my reaction to ADD is sort of like the line from Fiddler on the Roof: “It doesn’t change a thing but even so, after (35) years …It’s nice to know!” It’s nice to have a diagnosis, a name, a reason, an explanation for why I am the way I am and why I act and think the way I do. And I’m really glad to find these forums and discover that I’m not the only one like this out there!


On the depression side of things, however, things aren’t going so well. And I really need to talk to someone about it, but it’s easier to explain things in writing and in relative anonymity, so I am going to do so here. I’d appreciate any comments or advice you might have. This is going to be a bit long, so if you’re not in the mood, you should stop reading here. But I hope at least somebody reads this. But if not, writing it was good therapy anyways.


Anyhow, this last year, my depression has gotten a lot worse. And I’m not really sure why. It’s not because I’m in a new state far away from my family, I was depressed when I lived close to home too. It’s not because it’s winter in Alaska and we only get 5 hours of daylight, I was depressed in the summer when we got 18 hours of daylight. And it’s not because my Dad died 5 ½ months ago, I was depressed before that too!


This last semester has been so hard. Not in terms of academics, but in terms of ADHD and depression. Luckily, only one of my classes, Chemistry, has been a regular, sit down, full semester type course. I actually took four classes: Chemistry, Trigonometry, Geography, and CPR/First Aid.

The CPR/First Aid course was more of a workshop, it actually only met twice, for a total of eight hours, and was done. We watched a video, practiced CPR on dummies, discussed first aid and we were finished. Easiest class I've ever taken!

The Trigonometry and Geography courses were both distance courses. My Trig class was especially good for someone who has ADHD. The class was taught entirely over the internet and the lectures were all pre-recorded so that I could re-watch them whenever I needed to.


My geography class was a little more distracting. It actually WAS a regular, full semester course, it just wasn’t in a normal classroom setting. Instead, everyone called into an 800-number and we all “attended” class over the telephone. Which was really distracting, I found.

I admit it, I usually listened in for the first few minutes, acknowledged the roll, and then tuned out the rest of the lecture. All the tests have been open book anyways, so if I missed something I can look it up.


Sound great, right? Yeah, well here’s where I am right now. This next week is finals and I’m hopefully getting at least a B in all of my classes except one. Chemistry. That class, I am going to fail.

Why? Because I only went to class 5 times. Because I only handed in two lab reports. Because I almost never studied. Why? Wasn’t I interested? Yes I was and I am. Didn’t I understand the consequences? Yes, I do. I HAVE TO pass this class and it isn’t offered again until next fall, which puts my graduation back an entire year! So what happened?


Here’s what happened and is still happening. I can’t think straight, my life is in chaos, I have no study skills, I have no time management skills, I’m depressed, I have no energy, I have no motivation and all I want to do is curl up in my bed and sleep. My teacher actually bent over backwards and allowed me to make up assignments and hand in reports late so as to pass the class and I don’t even have the energy to open the book.


I hate this! Here I am living out two lifelong dreams – I’m living in Alaska and I’m studying Marine Biology – and what do I do? I spend all my time locked up alone in my room. I should be out taking pictures, walking the beaches, looking for wildlife, snow-shoeing, etc, etc. But I just can’t work up the energy to even try.


I should not only be studying for my actual classes, but I should also be reading books and science journals to supplement my studies. Normally, I’m a bookworm and I own dozens of books, but it’s been months since I read one. I’m just not interested any more. In the words of the country song “My give-a-d**n’s busted!” I wake up every day and think to myself, ‘I hate my life.’


Now let me make one thing clear, I am NOT suicidal. I would never ever consider that. I don’t believe it’s an option. Why not? Well, to answer that I have to step delicately so as to not disobey the “don’t talk about religion on the forums” rule, but I will try to explain.


I believe that we existed, as ourselves, before we were born and that we will continue to exist after we are dead. I believe that this life is like a test in school. Luckily it’s open book and helping your neighbor is encouraged. But getting frustrated, tearing up the test and storming out of the room won’t solve any problems.


And that’s how I see suicide. It doesn’t solve anything; you just end up out of the classroom with a half-finished test. So I say again, I don’t hate LIFE, I hate MY life! I wish this was a computer game and I could press “Start Over”.


I don’t want to be somebody else, for the most part I like who I am. I’m just tired of being tired and depressed. The real me, the ‘me with just ADD’, is happy and energetic and a chatterbox. I love science, especially marine biology, the outdoors, plants, animals, and I am a total bookworm.


I make friends easily, I’m great with kids and animals, and if any of you want to come to Alaska, I have it on good authority that I’m a fabulous tour guide.
I flit from interest to interest, I can be reading six books at the same time, I’ve been known to have 16 webpages plus the radio plus a movie going all at the same time. I collect things, ideas, facts, and stories, I love to tell jokes and I’m great at photography.


I love something I read on a “You know you have ADD when” site that said “…you take your crocheting everywhere because by golly if I’m going to fidget, I wanna fidget productively!”. And so I do cross-stitch, calligraphy, and both regular and thread crocheting. That’s the real me!


But the me that exists right now is tired and sad and unmotivated. I feel like my mind is asleep. I don’t have the energy to do anything. I stay inside all the time, I don’t even know where my camera is, and I have no interest in books or crafts.


Even my ADD meds, which are supposedly stimulants, make me drowsy. I wish there was some way to wake myself up. Unfortunately, the only ways I’ve found that even temporarily wake my mind up are also things that I shouldn’t be doing because they border on being, as the saying goes, immoral, illegal or fattening. Not that I’m the sort to do anything too terribly wrong.


Mostly I get my adrenaline rushes vicariously, which is one reason I’m such a bookworm and why I love action movies and fanfic sites. But I’m tired of living my life on the sidelines, I’m tired of being depressed. I want to start actually living my life. Does anybody know how I can build a fire under myself and get some energy and motivation back in my life? If you do, I’d love to know! Or if you could just let me know you understand what I’m going through, that would help too.


Thanks for reading,


Amy

Bluerose
12-06-08, 09:46 AM
Amy,

Hi! I'm sorry for your loss. And I'm sorry to hear about how bad you have been feeling for some time now it seems. I'm not saying this is what is wrong with you but have you considered that it might simply be a mid-life crisis kind of thing where we tend to look back and take stalk of our life and wonder about the choices we made. Or do you think it is something much more serious? I wonder if a change in meds would help. Sorry I don't have much more to offer but I hope you will stick around and keep posting. I'm sure someone else will come along with some better suggestions. Take care.

sloppitty-sue
12-06-08, 10:16 AM
Hi Amy,

After reading your post, I said to myself, "Amy. Welcome to my world."

I have been in weekly therapy for over three years. I've been taking Zoloft and Adderall for several years too - and at least I don't freak out all the time like I once did. I just met a guy who loves me and will do anything for me - and whom I really dig too. Still - the relentless lethargy keeps me from participating in life to the degree I'd like. I don't know what the answer is, but I understand.

Thanks for joining the forums. I look forward to hearing more from you.

Sincerely,
Sue

Retromancer
12-07-08, 09:44 PM
Welcome to the forums Amy!

Your post's title caught me eye as I was scanning through the list. I can definitely relate to it. It's clear your going through a depressive phase. I do not have any ready answers. What I can say is "this too shall pass".

I can testify emphatically that you can go through such a phase while taking stimulant medications. At best such drugs will keep you on your feet. It can feel like trudging through a snow storm. Your focus narrows down to just putting one foot in the other.

It sounds like you are in a supportive institutional environment at the least. I have have to admit I'm actually envious!:)

As far as contemplating suicide goes I believe Dorothy Parker put it best:

Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.

(I have been told that I have a dark sense of humor. I just can not see why people tell me that...)

I too am missing that intellectual spark. I am just too well behaved these days -- no interrupting people with something I just have to share!

I wish you success in finding your lost intellectual passion.

P.S.

I am curious about your decision to go to school at your advanced age. ;) When you have the time could you share with your fellow forum members your motivation for doing so? (I am thinking of doing so after having a decade passing since I was last in a classroom...)

A1A5KA
12-19-08, 12:59 AM
Hi again!

Sorry it's taken me a while to post again, but now finals are over and I am free again to play on the internet!

Thank you Blue-Rose, Sue, and Retromancer for your replies. It's really nice to know that someone is out there and understands me, even if it's just a little.

I'm doing a little better. Like I said, finals are over. I actually passed all my classes! The grade I got for Chemistry (D-) was an absolute gift, the teacher felt sorry for me. But I'll take it! Good news, because I didn't actually fail, it won't affect my financial aid. Bad news, I still have to retake the class, you have to get a C or higher to advance to the next class. Oh well.

I also went to see my psychiatrist and told him what has been happening lately. He was very concerned, especially when I told him that I hadn't left the house in days. He upped my Lexapro from 20 mg to 30 mg and my Dexedrine from 15 mg to 22.5 mg. How do I get a 1/2 milligram, you ask? Well, I was taking a 5 mg tablet 3 times a day, now I am taking 1 1/2 five mg tablets 3 times a day, so that's 7.5 mg per dose and 22.5 mg per day. Don't ask me if it's improving things yet, I think so, but this is only the second day I've taken the new dosage. So far, I'm a little less depressed, I think, but that could also be because I'm finished with my finals. So I'll have to give it a week or so and see how I feel.

Blue-rose: You asked if I was having a mid-life crisis... I hope not! I'm only 37, doesn't that mean I'm way too young for one of those? After all, didn't you know that middle age is always 10 years older than you are? LOL

Retromancer: I liked that poem, thanks for posting it! As for why I am in college, I would be happy to share that. I think I will post it sometime in the next few days over in the College/University Forum. So, keep your eyes out!

And everybody, please go check out my poll on the Chit-Chat forum!

TTYL,

Amy

stef
12-19-08, 03:56 AM
Hi,
I liked your long post! I wish I had seen it sooner. I've felt like this at times; but much less so since I actually found out about ADD. The first thing I thought was "lack of light!". (that is my major problem right now).
I just wanted to say, congratulations on finishing the semester & I hope you keep feeling better!

Retromancer
12-19-08, 01:18 PM
Congrats on finishing the semester. Take time out to recharge yourself, okay?

vixthenomad
07-02-09, 09:57 AM
Hi Amy,

Your post title made me chuckle in the midst of my own bout of severe depression, so well done - you've achieved where most others are failing at the moment. I totally relate to what you've written in the post as well.

Can I just say how much I admire your energy and zest for life. That comes through very strongly in your writing in spite of the depression that must be putting a hell of a dampener on it. Please keep coming back and posting more!

I don't have any advice really but just wanted to say I hear you and empathise.

Vix

weasel_tart
07-02-09, 05:10 PM
Hi, I just joined today. I feel for you, and totally understand how you feel. I feel the same. I am tired all the time. unmotivated to do anything. Sad, feel hopeless alot. The only thing that seems to help is to move. I have to get up, and make myself do something. It is really hard to do, and sometimes I just can't, but once I get going, it is alot easier to keep going. It can be very frustrating at times though. I will have a couple days, where I am really productive, which makes me feel good about myself, and then a little something happens, and I fall right back into my bad routine. I am very suseptable to bad vibes, and emotions. I get lost inside my mind, and it takes a long time to find my way out. Hang in there. There has got to be relief somewhere. You are not alone though, at least there is that thought :)